This is part 2 of our glorious fanfic. Once again, we don't own these
characters.blah blah blah...yakkity smackkity.
And on wth the show....
"Damn, it's Chewbacca!"
"Shut up Jenny!" yelled Kelly while she dragged Jenny away from the yeti. The evil wookie smacked Logan really hard and he flew back and snapped three trees in half. Jenny and Kelly cheered Logan on from a good distance away. Marie lay like a slug in Logan's make-out vehicle. She decided that she was cold so the dumb whore started a fire. Logan's shaggin' wagon bust out into flamage and Marie acted all wimpy and started to scream for help.
"She should just inhale the smoke and take it like the shim she is." said Jenny. Kelly started to dance around like the crack smoker that she was. The two beautiful girls stood by helpless as the sasquatch beat the living crap outta poor sexy Wolvie. Logan let loose his claws and then Jenny and Kelly really went nuts. "He can stab me to death anytime." said Kelly all dreamily.
"Yeah," replied Jenny, also dreamily. Suddenly it got all windy and shit. Two figures appeared.
"It's Obi-Wan coming to take me away!" exclaimed Kelly joyously.
"No way!" replied Jenny. "It's a possessed girl and a scary guy with red blue blockers on!" Well, the taller very unsexy oogly man shot red beams out of his eyes and the girl with the white eyes started to make it snow. The red beams caught that Bumble in the stomach and he went flying like a Magneto wannabe. They pulled that hooker Marie out of the flaming truck just before it blowed up reeeeeeeeeeeeeal good. "Awwwwww!!" moaned Jenny angrily, "I wanted to see her burn!"
"Yeah!" agreed Kelly, "Like a marshmallow!" The two odd people took Jenny and Kelly's Logan and that hookerface Marie with them. The girlsplotted their next molestation on Logan. DA DA DA!!!!
Meanwhile at gay Eric/Magneto's base..
"Weren't you supposed to bring someone back with you?" Toad asked, looking up from the giant penis he was spray painting gold. ::Ahhhhh,:: he thought, ::This is going to be one big Golden Rocket::
"Mutha fucka, are you out you're damn mind?" Sabertooth said. "Blehleh!" and then walked the fuck out. He walked to Mag-gayto's office o' Gay.
"What happened?" Magayto asked.
Sabertooth looked at him all crazy, cuz he was wearing pink lingerie. He could hardly tear his eyes away from his master's sexy, muscular, Gillette smooth legs.
"They knew, blehleh."
"I have made the first move, that's all they know." Magayto uncrossed his legs and let it all hang out. His shit fell on the floor.
Sabertooth almost creamed his jeans, while at the same time singing "I wish I was an Oscar Meyer wienerblehlehogarth."
Magayto looked at him all gay-like, and floated the hell outta the room.
Sabertooth looked down at Wolverine's dog tag on the metal table. It was encrusted with white filth. Sabertooth decided he didn't want to know.
::"Move the hell over," Jenny said to Kelly as they were typing this.::
Location: A random hospital-like room
The sexiest man in the universe, Logan, lay unconscious.....and shirtless on a metal table. Footsteps approached. They sounded like whore brand high heels. They were. They belonged to none other than Jean Havesexwithmenow Grey. She started feeling Logan up and touching him like a professional hooker would. Jenny and Kelly had somehow gotten into the place and were crouched under a metal wheelie bed.
"Oh hell nawwwwww," whispered Kelly angrily, "That whore is feeling on my man and doing a pretty piss poor job of it!!"
Jenny looked pissed. "Whadaya mean 'your man' ya dumb ass-snorting beeeeyyyyyatch?!"
Kelly and Jenny started to bitchslap each other and poke each other with various medical appliances. "Take that!"
"Taste this syringe ya penis nibbler!!"
While the two were fighting Logan woke up and started to choke Jean. He was throttling her dumbass!
Kelly and Jenny started to cheer him on, when Logan suddenly stopped. He saw the beautiful Jenny and madly fell in love with her. "Oh my love," he swooned," I love you!!" Jenny started to move forward into his open arms when Kelly the Evil tripped her the hell over.
"Bitch," screamed Jenny while rolling on the floor. Kelly started to grab at the shirtless Logan's biceps and nipplies. "Hey, what do you think you're doing, Bub?" Logan asked the still fondling Kelly. Jenny got up and tied Logan up with an IV tube.
"We got him," she sang happily while dancing around the room. Logan unsheathed his claws, which drove Kelly and Jenny wild, and cut the tubes. He ran away down the hall, his chest bouncing with every step. He ran into a corner where he found a sweatshirt. As he pulled it over his head, he thought he heard a girl yell, "Nooooooo!" He kept walking anyways.
He ran down the hall some more, skin glowing (what you could see of it anyway, since he put that damn shirt on. Bastard directors.) He ran into a random room and hid. When he turned around, he saw an old bald guy sitting in a chair, talking to a bunch of brats.
"Logan. Hello. Would you like some breakfast?" Baldy asked.
"Heeell mutha fucking naw! I wanna know where the fuck I am first!" Logan yelled.
"Rioght," he said, Dr. Evil-ish. "Welcome to my underground volcano lair. Ahem, I mean, my school for the gifted."
At that moment, a tall black girl with white hair strolled in like she owned the damn place. A tall oogly gay man wearing red Blu-Blockers followed her. He had a mad unibrow, too.
"What's all this shit about?" Logan asked perplexedly.
"This is Ororo Munroe, also called Storm. And Scott Sommers, also called Cyclops. They saved your life," Baldy said.
Logan raised an eyebrow in that sexy way he has. He looked at Storm. "Storm, right?" he asked, making that click-clacky noise. "So, what do they call you? Wheels?"
(authors's note: Jenny and Kelly were laughing their asses off at this point.)
"Yo mama," said Baldy to Logan.
Logan moved towards the door but ole Clopster was in the damn way. "Hey Unieye," Logan said while poking Clops roughly on his narrow underfed chest," Wanna get outta my way?" Logan's face was all scary and twisted.
Baldy piped in from behind Logan. "It's been 15 years of running," started Baldy," Running from the repo men. Not knowing where or how they could find you. They want that pinball machine that you never paid for. Why don't you just give them the fity bucks?"
"How do you know," asked Logan, totally mystified. "You're the not only one with powers," said Baldy psychically, while chanting," Pinball machine, repo men, pinball machine, repo men." "What is this place you whacked out mutha fucker," Logan asked, while doing that weird quirky thing with his mouth. "Yo mama's house ya bitch azzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz nigga," replied the Great Baldini," I mean, my school for gifted freaks, I mean mutants."
The scene shifted from Baldy to a bunch of random naked kids having a maaaaaaaad orgy. Logan's voice piped in, "Ummm, no."
(Okay, so they weren't naked and they weren't having an orgy. They were playing B-ball. Pretty damn close if you ask me.)
Another random kid ran across water. A random horse that has absolutely no relevance to the story whatsoever blew a mighty horse rip. Fffffffftttttttt. Random pieces of shit rained down everywhere. Logan picked Baldy's wheel chair and held it over his head like an umbrella.
"Poop's on you!" he shouted, giggling like a child.
(Rioght. Back to the story)
"The school is just a cover for something more," Baldy said, "The lower levels are an entirely different story."
Logan thought the X-Jet was pretty pimplicious, and the street walkers were hot. It was like Vegas down there. Slot machines at every corner, as far as the eye could see. Dancers were everywhere, with very few clothes on. Jenny and Kelly happened to be two of them.
"Can we give you a lap dance?" the two said in unison.
"Heeeeell yeeah!" Baldy said.
"Not you, mother fucker," and since we couldn't make him siddown, we pushed him the hell down the hall, where he fell off the edge. (This is actually true. Patrick Stewart DID actually almost fall off the hall in Cerebro.) His screams echoed all the way down, then there was a THUD as he hit the floor. The clang of metal on baldness could be heard throughout the country.
"LOOOGAAANNNN!!" yelled Baldy, from the bottom of Cereblo, "IIFFF YOOUUU HELLLPPP USSS, WEEE WILLLLL HEELLLLPPP YOUUU DISCOVERRR YOURRR PASSSTTTT LIIIIIFFFE!"
"Okay," Logan said, shrugging.
"WWHHHHAAAATTT? YOUUU HAAAVVE TOOO SPEEEAKK UPPPP!" echoed Baldy's voice from below.
"I SAID OKAY, GODDAMMIT!" yelled Logan.
"OOOOOOOOOKAAAAAAYYYY. CAAAANNN YOUUUU HEELLLLPPP MEEEE? II"VEEE FALLLLENNN DOOWWWNN THHHE WEELLLLL! THIIISS ISSS WHEEERRE JEEEEEEEEANN THRRRROOWWS HEEEEEEERRR OOLLLDDD USSEDDDD TAAMMMMPONNNS. IT'SSSS REEEAAALLLY GROOOSSS." replied Baldy.
Logan rolled his beautiful eyes and walked the fuck out.
"LLLOOOOOOGGGGGAAAANNNNNN!" he continued," SSSMMMMMEEEEELLLLL BBBBBBBBAAAAAAAAADDDDDDD!!!!"
~End Part 2
And on wth the show....
"Damn, it's Chewbacca!"
"Shut up Jenny!" yelled Kelly while she dragged Jenny away from the yeti. The evil wookie smacked Logan really hard and he flew back and snapped three trees in half. Jenny and Kelly cheered Logan on from a good distance away. Marie lay like a slug in Logan's make-out vehicle. She decided that she was cold so the dumb whore started a fire. Logan's shaggin' wagon bust out into flamage and Marie acted all wimpy and started to scream for help.
"She should just inhale the smoke and take it like the shim she is." said Jenny. Kelly started to dance around like the crack smoker that she was. The two beautiful girls stood by helpless as the sasquatch beat the living crap outta poor sexy Wolvie. Logan let loose his claws and then Jenny and Kelly really went nuts. "He can stab me to death anytime." said Kelly all dreamily.
"Yeah," replied Jenny, also dreamily. Suddenly it got all windy and shit. Two figures appeared.
"It's Obi-Wan coming to take me away!" exclaimed Kelly joyously.
"No way!" replied Jenny. "It's a possessed girl and a scary guy with red blue blockers on!" Well, the taller very unsexy oogly man shot red beams out of his eyes and the girl with the white eyes started to make it snow. The red beams caught that Bumble in the stomach and he went flying like a Magneto wannabe. They pulled that hooker Marie out of the flaming truck just before it blowed up reeeeeeeeeeeeeal good. "Awwwwww!!" moaned Jenny angrily, "I wanted to see her burn!"
"Yeah!" agreed Kelly, "Like a marshmallow!" The two odd people took Jenny and Kelly's Logan and that hookerface Marie with them. The girlsplotted their next molestation on Logan. DA DA DA!!!!
Meanwhile at gay Eric/Magneto's base..
"Weren't you supposed to bring someone back with you?" Toad asked, looking up from the giant penis he was spray painting gold. ::Ahhhhh,:: he thought, ::This is going to be one big Golden Rocket::
"Mutha fucka, are you out you're damn mind?" Sabertooth said. "Blehleh!" and then walked the fuck out. He walked to Mag-gayto's office o' Gay.
"What happened?" Magayto asked.
Sabertooth looked at him all crazy, cuz he was wearing pink lingerie. He could hardly tear his eyes away from his master's sexy, muscular, Gillette smooth legs.
"They knew, blehleh."
"I have made the first move, that's all they know." Magayto uncrossed his legs and let it all hang out. His shit fell on the floor.
Sabertooth almost creamed his jeans, while at the same time singing "I wish I was an Oscar Meyer wienerblehlehogarth."
Magayto looked at him all gay-like, and floated the hell outta the room.
Sabertooth looked down at Wolverine's dog tag on the metal table. It was encrusted with white filth. Sabertooth decided he didn't want to know.
::"Move the hell over," Jenny said to Kelly as they were typing this.::
Location: A random hospital-like room
The sexiest man in the universe, Logan, lay unconscious.....and shirtless on a metal table. Footsteps approached. They sounded like whore brand high heels. They were. They belonged to none other than Jean Havesexwithmenow Grey. She started feeling Logan up and touching him like a professional hooker would. Jenny and Kelly had somehow gotten into the place and were crouched under a metal wheelie bed.
"Oh hell nawwwwww," whispered Kelly angrily, "That whore is feeling on my man and doing a pretty piss poor job of it!!"
Jenny looked pissed. "Whadaya mean 'your man' ya dumb ass-snorting beeeeyyyyyatch?!"
Kelly and Jenny started to bitchslap each other and poke each other with various medical appliances. "Take that!"
"Taste this syringe ya penis nibbler!!"
While the two were fighting Logan woke up and started to choke Jean. He was throttling her dumbass!
Kelly and Jenny started to cheer him on, when Logan suddenly stopped. He saw the beautiful Jenny and madly fell in love with her. "Oh my love," he swooned," I love you!!" Jenny started to move forward into his open arms when Kelly the Evil tripped her the hell over.
"Bitch," screamed Jenny while rolling on the floor. Kelly started to grab at the shirtless Logan's biceps and nipplies. "Hey, what do you think you're doing, Bub?" Logan asked the still fondling Kelly. Jenny got up and tied Logan up with an IV tube.
"We got him," she sang happily while dancing around the room. Logan unsheathed his claws, which drove Kelly and Jenny wild, and cut the tubes. He ran away down the hall, his chest bouncing with every step. He ran into a corner where he found a sweatshirt. As he pulled it over his head, he thought he heard a girl yell, "Nooooooo!" He kept walking anyways.
He ran down the hall some more, skin glowing (what you could see of it anyway, since he put that damn shirt on. Bastard directors.) He ran into a random room and hid. When he turned around, he saw an old bald guy sitting in a chair, talking to a bunch of brats.
"Logan. Hello. Would you like some breakfast?" Baldy asked.
"Heeell mutha fucking naw! I wanna know where the fuck I am first!" Logan yelled.
"Rioght," he said, Dr. Evil-ish. "Welcome to my underground volcano lair. Ahem, I mean, my school for the gifted."
At that moment, a tall black girl with white hair strolled in like she owned the damn place. A tall oogly gay man wearing red Blu-Blockers followed her. He had a mad unibrow, too.
"What's all this shit about?" Logan asked perplexedly.
"This is Ororo Munroe, also called Storm. And Scott Sommers, also called Cyclops. They saved your life," Baldy said.
Logan raised an eyebrow in that sexy way he has. He looked at Storm. "Storm, right?" he asked, making that click-clacky noise. "So, what do they call you? Wheels?"
(authors's note: Jenny and Kelly were laughing their asses off at this point.)
"Yo mama," said Baldy to Logan.
Logan moved towards the door but ole Clopster was in the damn way. "Hey Unieye," Logan said while poking Clops roughly on his narrow underfed chest," Wanna get outta my way?" Logan's face was all scary and twisted.
Baldy piped in from behind Logan. "It's been 15 years of running," started Baldy," Running from the repo men. Not knowing where or how they could find you. They want that pinball machine that you never paid for. Why don't you just give them the fity bucks?"
"How do you know," asked Logan, totally mystified. "You're the not only one with powers," said Baldy psychically, while chanting," Pinball machine, repo men, pinball machine, repo men." "What is this place you whacked out mutha fucker," Logan asked, while doing that weird quirky thing with his mouth. "Yo mama's house ya bitch azzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz nigga," replied the Great Baldini," I mean, my school for gifted freaks, I mean mutants."
The scene shifted from Baldy to a bunch of random naked kids having a maaaaaaaad orgy. Logan's voice piped in, "Ummm, no."
(Okay, so they weren't naked and they weren't having an orgy. They were playing B-ball. Pretty damn close if you ask me.)
Another random kid ran across water. A random horse that has absolutely no relevance to the story whatsoever blew a mighty horse rip. Fffffffftttttttt. Random pieces of shit rained down everywhere. Logan picked Baldy's wheel chair and held it over his head like an umbrella.
"Poop's on you!" he shouted, giggling like a child.
(Rioght. Back to the story)
"The school is just a cover for something more," Baldy said, "The lower levels are an entirely different story."
Logan thought the X-Jet was pretty pimplicious, and the street walkers were hot. It was like Vegas down there. Slot machines at every corner, as far as the eye could see. Dancers were everywhere, with very few clothes on. Jenny and Kelly happened to be two of them.
"Can we give you a lap dance?" the two said in unison.
"Heeeeell yeeah!" Baldy said.
"Not you, mother fucker," and since we couldn't make him siddown, we pushed him the hell down the hall, where he fell off the edge. (This is actually true. Patrick Stewart DID actually almost fall off the hall in Cerebro.) His screams echoed all the way down, then there was a THUD as he hit the floor. The clang of metal on baldness could be heard throughout the country.
"LOOOGAAANNNN!!" yelled Baldy, from the bottom of Cereblo, "IIFFF YOOUUU HELLLPPP USSS, WEEE WILLLLL HEELLLLPPP YOUUU DISCOVERRR YOURRR PASSSTTTT LIIIIIFFFE!"
"Okay," Logan said, shrugging.
"WWHHHHAAAATTT? YOUUU HAAAVVE TOOO SPEEEAKK UPPPP!" echoed Baldy's voice from below.
"I SAID OKAY, GODDAMMIT!" yelled Logan.
"OOOOOOOOOKAAAAAAYYYY. CAAAANNN YOUUUU HEELLLLPPP MEEEE? II"VEEE FALLLLENNN DOOWWWNN THHHE WEELLLLL! THIIISS ISSS WHEEERRE JEEEEEEEEANN THRRRROOWWS HEEEEEEERRR OOLLLDDD USSEDDDD TAAMMMMPONNNS. IT'SSSS REEEAAALLLY GROOOSSS." replied Baldy.
Logan rolled his beautiful eyes and walked the fuck out.
"LLLOOOOOOGGGGGAAAANNNNNN!" he continued," SSSMMMMMEEEEELLLLL BBBBBBBBAAAAAAAAADDDDDDD!!!!"
~End Part 2