Shuukaku: Sake for everyone!
Fire: Uh…I don't drink.
Sasuke: Yeah, Fire's not old enough.
Fire: I'm old enough! Look! (holds up ID)
Sasuke: O.o I didn't know you were that old!
Fire: I'm not old!
Sand: This is my fanfic! (grabs Sasuke and throw him out of the dialogue window)
Fire: Sasuke! (runs after Sasuke)
Sand: (sighs) Sorry for taking so long for this chapter to come out. Gaara, my co-writer, was captured by Akatsuki.
Gaara: (groans slightly) Wha… Shuukaku?
Shuukaku: (stares at Gaara) That's what you look like? No wonder I was captured.
Gaara: (sand swirling around him) Sabaku kyuu!
Shuukaku: (dodges the attack) Not going to work, gaki! (runs away)
Sand: So, for the next few weeks, I'm going go after Akatsuki and try to get Shuukaku back.
Gaara: Who needs that bastard?
Sasuke: You?
Gaara: (sand grabs Sasuke by the feet, throws him out the window into the toilet, and attempts to flush him into the sewers) …
Fire: (grabs Sasuke away from Gaara's sand and attempts to fix his hair) Sasuke!
Sand: Someone pull up chapter 3. I'll be in Kawa no Kuni.
Fire: Baki, pull up chapter 3!
Baki: Why me…? (pulls up chapter 3)
0o0o0o0
Disclaimer: Sand owns nothing, but this doesn't mean that Suna isn't strong! All original terms are owned by Fire, not Sand. How pathetic is that! (Sand whacks Fire in the head) Which original terms will be brought up later if they appear in the fics.
0o0o0o0
Warning: All Japanese terms are used for the purpose of Sand's sadistic amusement by confusing fans. A glossary of all the terms used in every fanfic is now available at the Fire and Sand user profile. If you are confused about any term used in the story, please refer to the user profile for the complete definition.
0o0o0o0
Chapter 3: Response
Gaara was tapping his pencil impatiently on his desk. He really hadn't wanted to be around Kankuro for the past week. He had become nicer to his siblings, but his older brother was still a loser and a baka. And he was annoying.
"Oi! Gaara!" Kankuro ran up to his little brother, his face fully flushed.
Gaara turned to look at Kankuro. His brow furrowed with worry. 'Kankuro shouldn't run. Taijutsu isn't his best ability. He's not Lee.'
Kankuro's hands pressed down on bent knees as he tried to anchor himself to the ground. "I just overheard the elders talking about you!" His heavy panting caused his face to flush red in asphyxiation. He pushed himself up to look Gaara in the eyes. "You know...how a...kage...is supposed to...you know, promote good FAMILIAL ties..." His face reddened even further as he drew in each breath.
Gaara's eyes widened. 'What is he trying to tell me?'
"Ano..." Kankuro averted his eyes and began to blink VERY rapidly. "The elders think you should find a wife." His arms crossed across his chest, as if Gaara was going to smack him across the chest and send him out the window for that remark.
But Gaara was frozen. His eyes wouldn't even blink.
"At least a girlfriend." Kankuro shook his hands in front of himself in a joking manner, as if that would make the comment easier to swallow. The smile etched on his face only widened as he slunk to the red-head's side. "I heard that...you're... racking up...some...fangirls." He nudged his little brother in the side with his elbow and winked even though Gaara hadn't really heard him.
Gaara didn't even move a muscle. He became catatonic for the rest of the day.
Snapping the pencil in half, Gaara sighed heavily as he pushed his chair back and rose from his seat. He walked to the open window. A frown crossed his face as he stared down into the main street, then to the main gates.
'What is Temari doing? I assigned her the mission almost two weeks ago.' He was trying to get his mind off what Kankuro had said. 'She better have a good excuse this time.'
Gaara knew that getting a response to his request shouldn't have been that hard. Of course, Temari had a tendency to be too overbearing, or too shy around that guy, but…
'Kankuro should've gone with her.' Then the thought of Kankuro slacking off, hitting on girls then getting rejected enough to depress him out of remember his mission crossed Gaara's mind. His hand shot up to his shaking head as he cringed at the thought. His dark-rimmed eyes closed tight. 'Maybe not sending Kankuro with her was a good idea.' The mission didn't need two people to get a response, so Kankuro would've wasted the entire week.
The sand from the large gourd near his desk swirled and opened the door.
The painted-face jounin suddenly threw whatever was behind his back down the hall, grabbed his twisted fingers hanging in the air readying for a knock, and pulled them down. A wonky smile crossed his face. "G-Gaara... Hahaha... I was going to hand you the new order forms from the grocers and meat shops. I wasn't trying to hand you a sack of potential girlfriends." The large potato sack that he had thrown, had nearly hit Baki in the head. The handful of papers flew across the hall as the sack hit the ground.
Gaara turned to look at his brother. His expression was unreadable, as usual.
Kankuro laughed nervously, rubbed the back of his neck and placed the sloppily-picked-up handful of papers onto the neat, yet cluttered desk. "So, Temari hasn't returned yet?"
"No."
Kankuro was a little uneasy with his other sibling. At least Temari was normal and brought up like him, but...Gaara was special. He was different.
"She probably has a good excuse this time." Kankuro was trying to do what older brothers do...reassure. "Actually, she always has a good excuse," he said with a smile. His smile wasn't helping.
Gaara dismissed what Kankuro had said. It made his older sister sound like a slacker, and she wasn't a slacker. He looked down at the neat piles of paperwork on his desk, then at the messy pile from Kankuro. 'There's no end to the paperwork,' he inwardly sighed as he picked up a report from the immediate attention pile and his eyes instantly widened. 'Why is this here?'
0o0o0o0
Temari leapt through the forest in silence, but within her head, chaos reigned.
'That good-for-nothing, baka-Shikamaru!' She bounced off a trunk. 'I can't believe he said that!' She was steaming. 'He can't just tell me that then walk away.' Her fists were white-knuckled at her side as she suppressed her cataclysmically destructive anger.
'Uggh...' Her anger subsided, but it was replaced by frustration. 'WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME!'
The next few miles of forest instantly disappeared.
0o0o0o0
Ino's stare was becoming very uncomfortable. Her face was close...really close. She really didn't know the meaning of "invasion of private space."
"So...Shikamaru...I noticed that Temari was here. She was here just a few days ago and the day before that." She pulled her face away, but the look that she shot him sent a chill down his spine. "So, tell us! What was she here for?" The excitement in her voice made her sound very childish.
Shikamaru tilted his head up to look at the clouds as he let out a sigh. When he tilted his head to look at his teammate, a frown was etched on his face. "It's too troublesome to say." He closed his eyes as he scratched his head. "Besides..." He turned to look at Ino. "…you'll probably spread it around the village then it'll become even more troublesome."
Ino pouted and crossed her arms across her chest. "It's not my fault that the entire village depends on me for information. Anyway, did she come back to ask you for a date?" She was practically bouncing. Her excitement exploded, but the loud munching at her side was grating at her nerves. "Ah! Chouji! Stop eating for a second and help me prepare Shikamaru for his date."
"Munch munch I don't think that Shikamaru is munch munch going on a date with munch munch Temari-chan." Chouji slowed down his shoveling of food, slow enough to allow a few words out of his mouth.
"Of course it's a date! What else could it b—" Ino stopped in mid-sentence. She took her hands off her hips and straightened her back. She turned to the boy with the spiky pony-tail. "Shikamaru..." Her eyes bore into Shikamaru. "Did you do something to Temari? Something to hurt her?" 'He is a lazy good for nothing. Maybe he forgot their anniversary or something and now she's going to have her little brother kill him, or...'
Shikamaru's eyes widened a little before narrowing. "What are you trying to say, Ino?" He sighed. 'Ino's been around Team Seven too much. She's adopted some of Kakashi-sensei's perversion.'
Ino abruptly turned her head away from the clouds to face the brown-haired chuunin. "Huh? Oh, I didn't hear you." She was too busy dreaming up dirty scenarios in her mind. "Well, Shikamaru, what I'm trying to say is that you might have done something that might have hurt Temari's feelings or maybe she feels a little neglected. You do have a way of making a girl feel that way."
Shikamaru raised an eyebrow. "Ino…" The blond haired girl focused her attention on the brunette. "You couldn't be any further from the—"
"Ah! I'm glad everyone's here." Asuma interrupted Shikamaru's response. "Now I can tell you why I can't go w—"
"Asuma-sensei! It's rude to interrupt another person's conversation, especially when it's a private conversation!" Ino angrily scolded. The expression on her face caused Asuma to take a few steps back. His eyes widened in fear and confusion as he scratched his beard.
'She yells at me for interrupting her and she doesn't even take her own advice.' Asuma let out a long and exasperated sigh.
"Well, you can finish your conversation at the Yakiniku Shop."
"Asuma-sensei's the best!" Chouji chimed. His sensei's offer couldn't have come at a better time. He was down to his last three bags of chips and two cakes.
0o0o0o0
Shikamaru ignored Ino's pressing questions. He was too busy staring out the window...and thinking about that night.
"Well?" Temari needed his response.
Shikamaru stuffed the envelope into his pocket. He turned to face the blond kunoichi with his usual frown. "What's the purpose of this meeting?" Shikamaru mumbled under his breath, "It's very troublesome that the invitation doesn't include it."
"How should I know? I wasn't given a lot of information about it. All that he said was that he wanted to meet you." Temari's eyes sharpened. "Maybe he found some flaws in the modifications you gave him." She still didn't want to be here. She wanted to go home and scream at Gaara for making her do this. "I need a reply to report back to him as soon as possible." 'Hurry up and give me your answer already. I want to go home.'
Shikamaru scratched his head and began walking away. "If that's the case, why isn't he talking to you? You DID look over the modifications before you gave them to him."
Temari's eyebrow twitched and her white-knuckled fist was raised in suppressed anger. "What are you trying to say, baka!" She whacked him in the head. "Of course, I looked over them!" She was walking ahead of him now.
"Tch..." Shikamaru rubbed his head. "Well, the Kazekage is a smart guy. If he found any problems, he'd probably figure them out himself." He let out a sigh. "The other outcome may be that he needs more people to help with the paperwork." He stopped in mid step.
Temari stopped as well. They were standing in the middle of the main street that ran through Konoha.
"But, this outcome is incorrect. He has other advisors and he has his older brother who was originally trained to become the next Kazekage." Shikamaru frowned and let out another sigh. He squatted down and curved his fingers into a shaky circle. After some time had passed, he opened his eyes and got up. "I guess I'll go and pay him a small visit. It's been a while since I've last gone to Suna."
'What is going through that thick skull of his?' Temari looked apprehensively at him. 'What conclusion did he get?'
"Ja ne." Shikamaru had walked Temari to an inn. "It's late and this is the only inn with rooms still available." He waved a hand, turned around and was about to head back the opposite direction when a hand grabbed his wrist.
Temari was surprised to find herself in front of an inn. 'I thought I was walking HIM home!'
"Oi. Why did you accept? What prompted you to that decision?" Temari tried to read Shikamaru's face, but found nothing. His face—as emotionless as Gaara's—was always unreadable unless he was annoyed by something troublesome. "You can't just accept and walk away." She released her grip. "It might be something serious."
"I'll be fine." Shikamaru stuffed his hands into his pockets. "Besides, it's nothing serious." He shot her a reassuring smile, causing her to relax a little.
Temari stared at him before a smirk crossed her face. "Yosh!" She whacked him in the head. "I guess I have my answer." She waved before entering the inn.
Shikamaru rubbed his head. 'Why does she always hit me?' He slowly walked down the street. 'I hope what I'm thinking isn't correct.' But that wasn't likely, especially for a boy with a 290 IQ.
"Ah! Chouji! That was my piece of meat!" Ino glared at the abdominous boy.
"But that was the last piece of meat."
"It's still my meat!"
"Asuma-sensei..."
The table became silent. Ino stopped teasing Chouji about a broken stomach and Asuma stopped searching his wallet for money. All eyes turned to Shikamaru.
"I guess you can't come for this." Shikamaru sighed. 'Mendokuse.' His mind began to whine again.
0o0o0o0
The knocking at his door snapped Gaara back to reality. He was thinking up several excruciatingly painful ways to hurt Kankuro indirectly so that no one would notice when he executed him.
"Enter." The doors swung open at the command, and a blond-haired kunoichi stepped carefully inside.
Temari walked up to Gaara. She was one of the few people who didn't need to be completely formal towards the boy. It gave him a little freedom from the duties of a Kazekage. He was still a teenager after all.
"He said that he will be coming in a few days. Most of the academy students just graduated...and I had to force him to do some of the preparations. He's still as lazy as before," Temari said smirking with her hands placed heavily on her hips.
Gaara should've known that Temari would've stayed in Konoha to supervise the lazy chuunin's work. If she didn't, he would never do anything.
"He said yes?" Gaara would've cocked a brow if he had any. He speculated that Temari probably had a pretty hard time trying to ask the question, but she would've asked the brown haired boy sooner or later. And getting it out of the way was easier than having it sprung upon him unexpectedly.
Nodding, Temari's smirk faded. The thought of Gaara wanting to kill Shikamaru suddenly crossed her mind. But she shook the thought away. Her brother wasn't like that anymore. Of course, she still didn't know his true intentions of wanting to meet the baka. And asking him directly would just lead to the same answer.
"I'll have a room prepared for him."
Temari was still perplexed by her brother's unusual behaviour. 'He wouldn't do anything to Shikamaru...would he?' Usually after submitting her report, Temari left the office and rested in her own room; however, she was still really annoyed by the two scrolls she had seen on his desk a week and a half ago.
"Gaara..." Temari said uneasily.
Gaara raised his head. He was cleaning his desk from the splinters of earlier crushed pencil.
"Ano...I was just wondering...what those two scrolls were about." Temari was really nervous now. "The scrolls with Shikamaru's name on them." She—with Kankuro—usually advised Gaara on subjects that would help reinforce the security of the village, or other matters that would benefit the village but she never asked about what he did in his spare time…if he had any.
Gaara's expression was still blank. He took out a box of pencils… "Nothing. You should forget about them." …picked up a new pencil, and tried to get back to work. But he found himself rationalizing whether to give the scrolls to the girl or not. 'So she did see them...'
"Souka." Temari said with her eyes to the ground before raising her head with a fake smile. "Well, I better rest up. There's probably plenty of work to catch up on. I still don't trust Kankuro with the details." She was about to leave when a wall of sand blocked her exit.
'Che! If I don't tell her what they were about, she would just keep bringing it up and then Kankuro would start to annoy me about them.'
Turning around quickly, shocked and wide-eyed, Temari faced Gaara.
Gaara reached into his desk and furnished two neatly tied scrolls. One red and one blue. Then slowly walking towards the quivering girl, he handed them to her. The sand receded back into the large gourd on the ground.
Without saying anything, Temari rushed out of the office. Her heart was attempting to leap out of her chest. She had literally felt her life shorten a few years.
End Chapter 3
0o0o0o0
The crazy ranting of Sand:
Sasuke: (smoothing his hair back into place) Nani! I missed the story?
Baki: You were too busy fixing your hair, narcissistic freak.
Sasuke: What did you say! (eyes go sharingan)
Gaara: (sand whacks Sasuke away from Baki) …
Sasuke: A kage and a jounin against one, cheaters!
Fire: Sasuke! Don't start a war! (grabs Sasuke) But…you're with Oto now, right? (puts him down again) Never mind. Start a war between Oto and Suna. I don't care.
Orochimaru: Sasuke-kun, don't start a war between Oto and Suna.
Sasuke: (falls back) Fine.
Gaara: You're whipped.
Sasuke: Am not!
Sand: Swirly! (grabs Orochimaru and runs into the bathroom)
Kabuto: (runs into the bathroom at the sound of flushing) Orochimaru-sama!
Fire: So…he's your sensei?
Sasuke: O.o Not anymore.
Sand: (runs out of the bathroom with Orochimaru tied with several lengths of thick rope and chains, and gagged with several thick strips of cloth, stuffs him into an airtight box and grins) I can trade you for Shuukaku!
Fire: Won't he die if you don't give him air?
Sand: Akatsuki won't care as long as they get the ring bac— (pulls the box open and grabs Orochimaru's ring) They just want the ring!
Kabuto: Orochimaru-sama!
Fire: Doesn't this temporarily make you an Akatsuki member? You have the ring.
Itachi: No.
Sasuke: Itachi!
Itachi: (runs away) …
Sasuke: (runs after Itachi) Teme, die!
Sand: (runs after Itachi) Hey! Take me to your leader! I'll trade you this ring for Shuukaku!
Kabuto: (untying Orochimaru) Orochimaru-sama, daijoubu des-ka?
Orochimaru: Just get my ring, baka!
Kabuto: (runs after Sand) Sand-sama!
Gaara: (flies on a cloud of sand after Sand) I guess I have to go with them.
Fire: That just leaves me. (smiles)
Kisame: That's scary.
Fire: What is?
Kankuro: That smile.
Fire: Really? (stops smiling)
Shikamaru: Why are you hugging Kisame?
Fire: I want to.
Kisame: (trying to get away) Help! Fire burns!
Shikamaru: Kind of obvious, isn't it?
Chouji: (drooling over cooking Kisame) Mmm…fish… (thinks for a moment) Mmm…shark… That's supposed to be a delicacy.
Kisame: (shouts) Don't eat me!
Ino: You'll break your stomach eating him, Chouji.
Kisame: (pulls himself away and runs after Itachi) They're all cannibals!
Zetsu: Want to join the club?
Everyone: No!
Fire: Well, it might take a while before Sand returns. Hopefully they'll all be back by the next chapter. In the meantime, please open a review window and review.
Suna bunshin Gaara: (appears holding a sign) Review or I'll kill you.
Fire: That's not nice. We should just ask them nicely. They'll review.
Suna bunshin Gaara: (flips to the second sign) I'm not supposed to be nice.
Fire: Well see you next chapter where I'll torture Baki even more!
Baki: Nani! That's Kakashi's job!
Kakashi: I'm taking the fanfic off. Union orders.
Baki: (shouting) What union?