TITLE: Naughty Talk

AUTHOR: Aero
EMAIL: aerogrrl (at) gmail (dot) com
ARCHIVE: Of course (email)
DISCLAIMER: Digimon doesn't belong to me.
WARNINGS: Shounen-ai, taito, mild talk about locker hand-jobs (yes, you read that right. XD)
AUTHOR'S NOTE: Let me just apologize to anyone who reads this one-shot and is completely traumatized for the rest of their lives…I suggest taking a cold shower. XD And, this was just one of those things that happened. This is you stepping into my mind. Scary, I know. XD OK, I had almost an entire chapter of Imaginary Friend written…but, when I reformatted my hardrive I lost all my progress…so, I'm starting from scratch. I wouldn't expect a chapter for any of my longer work-in-progresses because of that reason. I'm looking through all my backed-up discs to make sure I really don't have them, though.

---

It was the first day back from break, and Taichi was almost glad to be getting back into the groove of things. Those 'things' being school. Okay, so maybe it should be singular, 'thing'. But, that doesn't really matter right now.

He dashed up the stairs to the second floor, but tripped on the last stair--falling flat on his face, skidding across the hallway. "Ow," he muttered into the floor. Lifting his face off the floor, he looked down the hallway. Giving an embarrassed laugh, he waved sheepishly to all the students staring at him. He picked himself off the hard floor, and looked around for his runaway book-bag. "Ah-ha!" he said, grabbing his bag that had went further down the hallway.

Saying 'hi' to the few people that were still staring at him, he continued down the hallway towards his locker. He hoped he could remember his combination--if not, he'd have to ask Yamato. The blonde was the only person that knew Taichi's combination--he hadn't had much luck with his locker this year. Taichi swore up and down that it hated him.

Stopping in front of his locker, he put in the combination. He pulled up on the lever, but it was still locked. It didn't faze Taichi though, and he just re-did the combination. He got the same outcome as before. Glancing around the hallway, he sighed frustratedly--he tried once more.

"I hope you rot in the deepest depths of hell," he mutter aloud to the locker. "Melting away into nothing but a blue puddle of metal and paint."

"No wonder it doesn't like you," interrupted a voice. "You say mean things to it." Taichi looked up at the voice's owner. He grinned lopsidedly.

"Hey, Yama."

"Hey."

Taichi stepped back and gestured for Yamato to do his combination. Yamato obliged. When the locker popped open easily, Taichi grunted.

"You did that just to spite me," he said to the locker. Yamato laughed.

"Y'know, maybe if you would be nice to it; it wouldn't give you so much trouble."

"What do you want me to do? Kiss it?" Taichi said, his hands wildly waving around. "Talk naughty to it? 'Cause I'll try just about anything."

"I don't know about the kissing thing…if that's what you're into, I guess…but, the talking naughty thing might just work," the blonde said with a smirk crossing his arms over his chest.

Taichi smirked back as he closed his locker. "Turn it on a little, huh?" he said as he stroked the front of his locker. "Hey, baby…wanna come over to my place? I'll make it real good for you," he said as he spun the combination dial. Yamato raised an eyebrow and shook his head.

"That's not exactly what I meant…at least, I don't think that's what I meant."

Taichi shrugged. "I'm really not all that keen on what a locker's sexual pleasures are. I'm not usually trying to turn on lockers, y'know." He turned the dial as he entered his combination. The brunet's mouth dropped open when the locker opened with ease. Taichi glanced at Yamato and said, "That's a little creepy."

"See? I told you. You gotta be nice to the locker," the blonde said with a smirk. Taichi shook his head.

"That wasn't being 'nice' that was me giving a locker sexual pleasure…I can't believe you even suggested that!" Taichi shut his locker again and stared at it.

With a laugh, Yamato said, "Now it'll be expecting you to give it the real deal." Taichi watched Yamato wriggle his eyebrows suggestively. "But, I didn't suggest anything…I just said for you to be nicer to the locker…not give it a hand-job."

"Since when was that a hand-job? Who says it's a guy?"

"You just did."

The brunet's mouth dropped opened. "I did not! I would never give a locker a hand-job. I may be kinky, but not kinky enough to give some locker a hand-job."

"It was a hand-job," Yamato pointed out with a laugh. "Not only that, but you gave it a hand-job while a witness stood here and watched."

Taichi smirked slyly. "Yeah, you did just stand there and watch, didn't you? Bet you were turned on too. Did you want in on the action, too?"

"Oh, yes, so turned on," Yamato said sarcastically. "Because you giving a locker a hand-job was so sexually arousing." Taichi nodded.

"It was sexually arousing…I am aroused…you should be too."

"Since when do you use the word aroused?" the blonde asked raising an eyebrow and shaking his head. Taichi shrugged.

"Next time, maybe I'll just rub my ass on it and hope for the best…I'm never giving another locker hand-job again. I'd rather a locker be sexually aroused by me rubbing my ass on it then giving it a hand-job." Taichi contemplated this for a few seconds as he stared at his locker. "Or, maybe I'll just have you continue to open it because I need to go take a cold shower…all this hand-job talk--locker or not--has…well, yeah."

Yamato smirked and gestured to the empty bathroom across the hall. Taichi grinned suggestively, grabbed Yamato by the shoulders, and pushed him into the bathroom.

At the end of the day when Taichi opened his locker on the first try. The brunet smirked triumphantly and closed the locker. He looked up at Yamato; flung an arm over his shoulder and said, "Wanna come over to my place? I'll make it good for you."