Chapter 16
Christine sat on the ground between the two men as Antoinette tried unsuccessfully to contain her laughter.
"I fail to find any humor in my situation, Antoinette." She hmmphed indignantly. "Please, stop."
As she considered the sight she must present, she too began to laugh. For one brief moment, Erik and Raoul forgot their differences and exchanged a glance of complete bewilderment before their territorial instincts prevailed once again.
As her laughter subsided, Christine looked from one man to the other, waiting for one of them to assist her from the ground. Both men reached for her but as Raoul's hand neared her, Antoinette put a restraining touch on his arm with a sympathetic squeeze. When he looked at her, she barely shook her head in an attempt to make him see it was no longer his place, but Erik's. His eyes registered reluctant understanding as he straightened, watching Erik lift Christine gently into his arms.
"You are still too weak to be on your feet for long. We need to go back and begin to make our plans."
"And Raoul? Did the two of you manage to work anything out, Erik? Or are you going to continue to wage war on each other?"
"We have yet to reach an agreement on that." His eye caught Raoul's for a moment before he turned and led them back to the other grotto, Christine cradled against him.
----------
Erik had retrieved a blanket and wrapped Christine in it upon their arrival back at the table. They gathered as a group around the old table, the air remaining thick with tension as Raoul continued to watch Erik warily. Antoinette and Claude shared an uneasy glance as Christine sat serenely, waiting for either man to make a move. The silence grew oppressive as all eyes looked from Erik to Raoul and back awaiting the storm they knew was about to be unleashed. Claude finally broke the tension.
"Erik, we went to see M Legarde. He is willing to assist us in any way we may need."
"Assist you?" Raoul looked with surprise at the four. "What do you mean assist you? What do you think is going to happen? Christine, you need to return with me. I'll – drop all charges if that's what you need to hear, but you cannot still want to stay here. I just don't understand."
"Well, this isn't exactly coming to terms with each other, Raoul, is it?" she asked, incredulity written on her face. "Erik and I will be leaving Paris. We are going to make a life for ourselves, Raoul. How many times must you hear this?" She shook her head slowly, sadly, knowing he refused to accept the inevitable. As she watched him, a dawning realization crossed his face.
"Christine, earlier, when you were, when we…you said to-, that you accepted his proposal? He has asked you to marry him? And you said yes?" He looked at her aghast, disbelief in his eyes.
"He did, and I said yes." She turned briefly to Erik, smiling. "I told you, Raoul, I love him." Claude and Antoinette smiled broadly as Claude began to rise, congratulations on his lips, but seeing the look on Raoul's face, he hurriedly sat back in his chair. Christine reached out imploringly. "I cannot deny my feelings, to you or to myself. You must find a way to accept my decision and find a way to accept Erik as well. For me, Raoul. Please."
Antoinette stared at the table, sorrow filling her heart at Raoul's plight. It was obvious to her how much he loved Christine, but what kind of love? It did not reflect his heart as Erik's love did
his. Erik seemed to always want Christine to do what she wished. Raoul wanted Christine to do what he wished. It seemed to Antoinette that one was selfless while the other…
Without thinking, she reached her hand and placed it on Raoul's arm for the second time that day. Lifting her eyes to his, she tried to convey her compassion at his heartbreak. He looked back, briefly covering her hand with his own.
Christine watched with interest the exchange between them. Raoul's arrogance had gone, and in its place she saw a dawning maturity. She only hoped his acceptance would come as well. Perhaps things could change.
Raoul sighed and looked down at the table for the longest time. When he gazed at Christine once more, the tears she saw were of the same type witnessed during her last night on the stage, when she knew that betrayal was imminent, but not realizing whose betrayal it really was. She had betrayed them all. Erik, when she removed his mask, exposing him to the world. Raoul, when she left him and pushed the boat away, returning to her true love. But herself most of all, for not following her heart in the first place, creating the chaos they now found themselves immersed in. She was as helpless to stop it then as she was now, because she'd refused to accept what she knew in her heart to be true. It had always been Erik. No one but him.
"All right, Christine. I have no choice but to accept your decision. I do not however, have to accept his-Erik's, attempt on my life. I want him arrested and brought to trial."
Erik had taken in the scene and wondered at the outcome. Raoul's response did not surprise him.
Christine spoke softly to Raoul, pleading now for Erik's life.
"Raoul, he could have killed you, but he didn't. I knew he would not have. He was no less desperate than you. Can't you see that? He let you go. Please, don't do this to him, to me. Please."
"Christine, you don't know what you ask of me!"
"Yes, I do. If I didn't think you could do this, I wouldn't ask."
He hesitated a moment before he spoke.
"I need time to think." He rose from the table stalking to the far side of the grotto.
Erik looked at the other three, still seated with him.
"Well, Christine, that went well."
----------
The four sat at the table running through their plan for some time, no one noticing that Raoul had been watching from across the room. He tentatively approached the table and all eyes turned to him in surprise.
"I've been listening to your plan – Erik. You have a serious flaw. How do you propose M Legarde to get you past the checkpoints? You've already raised suspicion once. You won't get past them a second time."
"And what would you suggest, Raoul? Only a moment ago, you would have been delighted to have me captured by the gendarme."
"Perhaps…but it is no longer what I want that needs to be addressed. It is Christine's desire that I need to honor. She has asked me to set aside my differences with you. I am willing to try. She wants to leave the city – with you," he sighed deeply, "and I can help. I do this for her, Erik, not for you."
Claude had left sometime earlier and returned now with M Legarde. Erik watched as the man looked around in apprehension and awe. For him, this place had been his home, all he'd ever really known. For anyone else, he knew it must be a place of questions and uncertainties. Claude had asked how he could have spent most of his life here. He was sure Jacques wondered the same.
"Jacques, this is my good friend, Erik. Erik, this is Jacques Legarde. He has agreed to help us in our plan to leave the city."
Once again, the word "friend", struck Erik, as if it was one from another language he was hearing for the first time. He watched the hesitation on Jacques' face before he nodded and reached out. Erik smiled bemusedly and shook Jacques hand, probably the first time he'd ever done so in his life.
"So, monsieur, you think you will be able to assist us in our journey? I hope you are ready for what you will encounter. Our lives may depend upon your willingness."
They continued to make their plans until Claude looked at his watch and mentioned the time.
"Antoinette, perhaps you should start dinner. We shall be getting hungry soon and I think we have little left to discuss for the time being." She smiled at her father and rose from the table to begin preparations. Christine had become more tired with each passing hour until she had finally rested her head upon Erik's shoulder. Raoul had watched the two throughout the conversation, noticing for the first time how gentle and patient Erik seemed to be with her. The adoration she felt for him was obvious every time she looked at him. Raoul fought against the pain of wishing for the impossible; that she could love him that same way, but the more he watched their interaction, the more he realized it would never be. As long as this Erik lived, and perhaps beyond, her heart would always belong to him alone.
Erik reached his hand to Christine.
"Christine, my love, it's time you got some rest. I'll bring your dinner when it's ready. This was your first day up and it's been a long one. Let me help you to your bed."
"No, Erik. I can find my way. You have things to finish here." She nodded knowingly in Raoul's direction and smiled at them both.
"Please. I will be fine." She rose slowly and headed for her bed, Antoinette following behind.
"I shall see to her, Erik, and will return shortly."
The two women left. Raoul looked around the table and, clearing his throat, made his move to leave.
"Raoul." Erik spoke quietly but his tone stopped Raoul cold to question what was on Erik's mind. Erik's face rapidly changed from intense to bland as he addressed Raoul.
"Don't worry, Vicomte. I have no intention of anything other than to suggest you take the back way out this time instead of traipsing through the lake again. Much easier on the health." He turned back to Jacques to finish making a point, a devilish smile playing about his lips.
"Monsieur Vicomte. Allow me to show you the way out, sir." Claude approached him, extending a nervous hand in the direction of the proper tunnel. Raoul thought it interesting that, after having spent the day with them all, Claude should still be uneasy around him. He had never noticed before how others treated him. He'd never had reason to. Everyone was either a peer or servant. Until now.
"Thank you, Claude. Will I be able to return the same way in the future?"
Erik's head shot around and he eyed Raoul with suspicion.
"Do not worry, Erik. I gave Christine my word. I will not go back on that. But I shall need to return of course, and I do prefer the drier path as you said." Erik reluctantly nodded his understanding then turned away again, dismissing Raoul.
Claude led Raoul some way through the tunnel before Raoul spoke.
"Have you known Erik a long time, Claude?"
"Oui, Monsieur. He has been a part of my family for many years now, though he would never say that he is."
"And how is it that you came to know him?"
"He saved my Antoinette's life when she was very young. She had been attacked in the street, at night. He rescued her and returned her to my wife and me. He has been my responsibility ever since, though he does not know that."
"You have a wife then?"
Even in the torchlight, Raoul could see the dark cloud that passed in front of Claude's face.
"Had, Monsieur. She…died some time ago now. I miss her very much."
"What happened?" Raoul found the little man interesting. Until he asked about Claude's wife, the older man seemed to always have a spark in his eyes that Raoul had rarely seen in anyone. Perhaps in some ways, he is not so different from me. Tragedy can strike each of us after all.
"Some type of blood disease. At least that's what Erik called it. A 'poisoning of the blood' for which there is no real cure. He fought for her life for days but in the end - well, God took her home. Erik could do nothing to stop it. For a long time he blamed himself. I'm not sure he has ever really stopped." His voice dropped off as if he spoke his last words to himself. Raoul listened with a new awareness of his enemy. Perhaps this monster has a heart – even a soul - after all. He had seen how tenderly he cared for Christine. He'd even watched Erik at the table, as if Erik was a human being after all. He knew he could have given Christine everything she could have ever needed, but not what she wanted-the kind of love that Erik could share with her. He'd watched them during Don Juan as they pledged their souls to each other, in front of hundreds, something she could never bring herself to do to him, even in private. I love you Christine. I love you enough to give you what you want. He would not go back on his word to her. He would help them escape the city.
Antoinette had just finished getting Christine settled when Erik came round the corner.
"Well, Christine, I'll be going to get dinner ready. I'm sure you'll have company until then. Erik." She nodded at him, winked at Christine and left. Christine watched Erik approach her bedside.
"You need to sleep, Christine. I shall wake you when your meal is ready. I wanted to see that you are all right first."
"I am fine, a bit tired perhaps but…" She looked at him pensively for a moment. "Erik, do you think you and Raoul will ever find a way to exist together in the same world? It pains me to see you both circling the way two bull elk do when they vie for their own territories. You must believe in my love for you. Raoul will eventually let go of his feelings. But you ruffle his feathers at every opportunity and that does not help things."
"Christine, I merely have a bit of fun at his expense. If it hurts you, my love, then I shall stop. He 'ruffles' so easily though, that it makes it quite amusing – "
"Well, I don't care for it. I know he is hurting. I have pledged you my heart, but I did care for him at one time, though only as a childhood friend. Please, Erik. I am yours. Leave him to find his own heart without hatred. He will never take mine from you." She looked at him with eyes full of tenderness, willing him to accept her and to trust her.
-----------
Raoul entered his town home, discouraged and heavy hearted. If he had kept his eye closed before, they were wide open now he could no longer mistake Christine's intentions. She would stay with Erik, and nothing else mattered to her. Sighing, he went to the library and poured a brandy. The servants had a fire burning and he swirled the amber liquid before it, watching as it coated the snifter, running down to join its source; swirling up the side again, to repeat it's path, over and over. He realized he was the brandy in the glass, swirling up the side of his life, trying to reach the rim, and Christine, only to run down to pool and start once more. Bringing the snifter to his lips, he threw his head back, draining it in one swallow. He must do the same with his life. Swallow it whole and hope to begin anew.
Pouring another drink, he went to his desk and, with pen and ink, began to make notes of the things he would need to arrange within the next two days. For you, Christine. Only for you.