Yoga?


Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight. It belongs to Stephenie Meyer. Boy, she rocks.

Summary: You would think that the Cullens and Bella would never do yoga, right? See what happens when they have to do a mandatory class. What troubles will occur?


It's a Friday. The last day of school right before the weekend. Nothing bad could happen, not on a Friday.

Unfortunately that myth has been broken, the Cullens and Bella's day has just been dampened. Actually, there Saturday has just been ruined.

'Students, please report to the cafeteria for an announcement.' Squawked the speakers across the school.

Bella looked confused while Edward was searching people's minds to see if they knew what was going on.

When Bella and Edward reached the cafeteria, they went to sit with the rest of the Cullen family at there table. Alice looked overly excited and everyone else was waiting patiently to see what lame announcement needed to be said.

Bella sat down next to Alice and said, "What is this announcement about Alice." Alice just shook her head and hissed to Edward, "Stay out of my head."

Everyone then turned there attention to the podium because the principal had just come. He began with very boring things like, "Remember to take home fliers for some little hiking trip." Finally he came to the big announcement.

"I called you all from class to announce that the next two weekends we are going to have a yoga class. We have divided the school into those four days so that everyone has a chance to do yoga. We believe that it is a great thing to try other cultural forms. Yoga has a deep philosophy that is rooted down through the many ages. So we have a yoga instructor who will help you to experience this. Your name and class date is posted on the back wall so go check it out."

The Cullens raced, at a top notch human speed, to the back to see where they were placed. Edward dragged Bella with him so that she could also see where she was placed.

Fortunately they were all placed in the same class together, even Bella. They were in the class on Saturday at 3 pm. Edward was slightly upset because Mike was also in that class and Jessica was not placed in the class with him.

But new problems arose. "I don't have an outfit that is suitable for yoga!" said a slightly nervous Bella. Who wouldn't be nervous when, A) you just told a vampire that loves to shop that you need and outfit, and B) you are horrible at balancing.

Bella looked at Alice whose face was slowly cracking into a maniac like grin. Alice's eyes flashed as she wordlessly grabbed Bella and ran outside to Edward's nearby Volvo. Edward laughed as he followed.

Emmet, Jasper, and Rosalie just went to the red convertible and sped off home.

Meanwhile Alice, Edward, and Bella arrived at the mall. Alice immediately went to a sporting store with an expensive line of sporting goods. She started grabbing random stretch pants suitable for the stretching of yoga and good sports shirts. Once Alice had a mountain of things she pushed Bella into a stall and forced her to try on everything.

Bella sighed as she looked at all the clothes. They were all good looking but one outfit really stood out. Black Capri's that was snug against her legs and waist and a deep red tank top shirt that also fit snugly. After trying it on to make sure that it fit, she emerged with the out fit and proceeded to pay.

However Alice was not going to have this, she quickly made an appearance and grabbed the items out of her hand and went to the cashier. Edward stopped Bella from going to attack Alice for paying for the out fit.

After they were done at the store Alice attempted to get Bella to go to other stores. But Alice's plan was thwarted when Bella said no and headed to the car.

When they got to the Cullen's house Bella was grabbed by Edward and was raced up to his room. Bella and Alice were going to have a "sleep over" tonight, at least that was what they told Charlie.

Thus night descended amongst them, but all too soon did the next day come bringing with it there doom. Well, not really but it wasn't going to be to pretty.

They all showed up for the class and they went to the mats in the front since nobody was there.

Soon student began to file into the room. Mike took a mat behind Bella's. Edward sent a low growl to him, and Bella put a hand on Edward's arm.

The class had barely begun and things were starting to go downhill.

After everyone had taken a mat did there yoga instructor come in. He was tall and of a muscular build. He had brown eyes and brown hair. Once he had seated himself on his mat did he begin with having everyone sit comfortably, Indian style, with there palms up and there eyes closed. They began with the simple breathing in and out with there own rhythm. The goal, to allow thoughts to pass through your head, but to not invite them or engage with the thoughts.

So far the Cullen's were bored out of there minds. Bella however was finding this comforting; she was able to just live in the moment and not have to worry about the future, or the past.

Then the instructor continued with a chant:

Asatoma sadgamaya

Tamasoma jyotir gamaya

Mrityorma amritam gamaya

(A/N: This is and actual chant, it means, May this practice lead us from the unreal to the real, from darkness to light, from time-bound consciousness to the timeless state of being.)

Emmet and Jasper decided to have a contest to see who could say it faster.

After they had done the chant they began the poses. The first pose was child's pose. So far so good, nobody was dead, yet.

They proceeded onto there hands and knees to start to head into triginasana which is a triangle pose. Bella struggled a little with her balance but she continued using the breathing that the instructor told them to use. Edward was stiff for a moment and then he was growling in a low voice. Mike was starring at Bella and Edward was not at all thrilled with his thoughts. But Bella was so into the breathing technique that she could care less what was happening around her.

That was far from the case with the other Cullens.

Emmet: Bummed because he lost to Jasper at the contest. He was now officially bored and was not at all interested in this class. He was close to trying to fake being ill to get out.

Jasper: Proud that he won was happy except that he was stuck doing poses. He was praying that this class would end.

Rosalie: So angry that you could probably see steam coming from her hears. She was constantly thinking of her car and driving as fast as possible from this place. She was also thinking of Emmet but let's not enter that door.

Alice: Was waiting for the grand finale were everything would come to a very funny ending with a loud bang. She was just biding her time.

Edward: Was beyond angry, he was furious at Mike. His thoughts were so gross and disgusting he wanted to kill the guy.

Then the instructor decided to go around fixing poses. He went to Bella, her pose had little wrong but nonetheless the instructor still came to fix it, he stayed a little too long "fixing" it though. Edward was stiff and angry.

He then went to Rosalie. She had the pose perfect and he still came to "fix it". He had skipped Edward, Emmet, and Jasper.

Just as he started on Rosalie, Emmet came up to the guy and was dragging him outside Edward right with him. Jasper looked amused. Alice was waiting for the inevitable, Rosalie was looking bored.

The rest of the class just went into social mode. Talking and such. Mike decided to try and talk to Bella. Bella was sitting on her mat waiting for Edward to return and then Mike sat down next to her. He put his hand on her knee and was about to try and talk to her about dumping Edward because he was all wrong for her when Edward appeared and grabbed Mike by the collar. He was dragging Mike outside were Emmet and the instructor were.

Bella took this time to go to Alice. For when Bella had looked at Alice, she had an amused face on.

"What is going to happen Alice?" asked a very suspicious Bella.

"It is going to be a big bang." said Alice.

Suddenly there was a huge bang coming from the parking lot. Everyone rushed outside to see the instructor's car and Mike's car smashed together.

Apparently, in there haste to escape the furious vampire's they did not see each other.

Alice was grinning because they had feebly tried to escape her brothers clutches and it was funny to see them squirming to escape. They had taken off with Emmet and Edward gaining on them.

"Well, class dismissed." said Rosalie to Alice and Jasper, ignoring Bella.

"Let's go home, we'll see those two in a few hours, after they have beaten up those two guys."

"So, who do you think will last longer against Edward and Emmet?" asked a thoughtful Jasper.

Alice smiled and said," The instructor because Edward is after Mike. Edward is faster and will get Mike first. But I think once Emmet gets the instructor his odds will go down."

Jasper laughed a booming laugh as they, Rosalie, Alice, Jasper, and Bella, went home.


So,….did you like it? By the way, you all should at least try yoga. It is very calming and relaxing. At least try it. Oh and if you liked this and would like me to continue some funny one shots tell me.

Review please!

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