Harry was bored, bored to the point that he found the word walrus entertaining, bored to the point that he had began to come up with names for his future children (so far he had come up with Lily, James, Mia, Mara, Xizor, Xavier, dlanoR, and Beelzebub), so bored that he began to count the number of hairs on his right arm, so bored, well you get the point.
It was the summer after Harry's fifth year at Hogwarts, the year he had christened "The year of Sucking." He had gotten over the death of Sirius by reasoning that it wasn't really his fault and that as long as he avenged his death, got laid, and pranked Hogwarts a dozen times, Sirius would be happy. So here he sat on his bed, on the eve of his birthday, waiting for the infamous clock to strike twelve so he could officially say he was sixteen, Wohoo!
'I am so bored' thought Harry. He watched the clock until it struck mid night. Then everything went black.
-----Scene Break of Utmost Importance-----
Harry opened his eyes slowly, and then quickly closed them, to ward off the bright light. He began to slowly sit up, when a voice to his left drew his attention.
"Oh goody goody goody! Finally a new one! Super just super!"
Harry quickly looked up to find an old man clapping his hands and bouncing on the balls of his feet. 'This guy looked a lot like a tall version of Professor Flitwick.' Harry thought.
"Where am I?" Harry asked.
"The Realm of Knowledge, of course." The man said excitedly. "Three Plaines below heaven, two above hell. Right between the Pencil Pushers and the idiots, that's yours, where all knowledge is found."
"Why am I here?" asked Harry, He was now officially confused.
"That would be, because the pencil pushers deemed you a worthy recipient of this gift. Must have taken an a lot of Karma points to get you here. I meen, the last person to come here was Budah." The man replied
"Karma points?"
"Yeah, Karma points. Like power points in a video game."
"I've never played video games."
"There's a Karma bonus. Well how about RPG's, ever played RPG's?
"No." Harry was even more confused now.
"There's another Karma bonus. Well then, think of them as money you can use for self improvement."
"Ok?"
"The Pencil Pushers check your karma points and give you talents, skills, and gifts accordingly. This is one of your gifts. Five years here."
"FIVE YEARS! I don't have five years! I have to get back. I have to save the world. Again." Harry yelled
"Oh don't worry." The man laughed. "All you are sacrificing is five seconds on the idiot plane and your appearance and that's only because we can't stop humans from aging."
"What about you?"
"Oh. Well I kind of got kicked out of heaven for sleeping with Gods daughter. But dang, was it worth it. But we have to get moving and get your gift going."
The man grabbed Harry's shoulders and pushed him into another room. The room was huge and filled with billions of shelves that were in turn filled billions of snitch-sized orbs. In the middle of the room was a chair that reminded Harry of a dentist's chair. Well, that is except for the three inch hole in the middle of the head rest but what ever.
The man led Harry to the chair and forced him to sit down. He then proceeded to strap Harry's arms and legs down with thick leather straps. He forced Harry's head back and strapped his head down. Harry was now panicing. Obviously.
The man smirked. "This may hurt a little." He then pressed a button and a twelve inch steel spike stabbed through the back of Harry's head and rammed its way through his fore head. Harry screamed. The man grabbed an orb off a shelf and put it in a hole in the arm of the chair.
Harry's Eye's snapped open and went blank. Ten seconds latter his eye's widened a bit.
Harry smiled. "I know Kung Fu."