Mabel mentally giggled as she sat on the couch with her brother, their antics about to ensue. "Oh, no, Mabel. I-I don't feel so good!" Dipper said like he was sick. "I . . ." He made a retching noise and sprayed silly string all over her, and she groaned.
"Oh! Grunkle Stan, what did you feed us?" she asked. She retched, too, and sprayed Dipper right back, and then it was all out war, his pink string against her purple. They both laughed.
"Guys, guys, stop!" Wendy said frantically, walking up. Antonio followed her, looking just as, if not more, alarmed. "Something terrible just happened!"
"The world as we know it is at stake!" Antonio added.
Both twins kind of looked up at the teens, not really sure whether they were joking, though, if Mabel knew her twin as well as she thought she did, he was probably freaking out inside.
Then, at once, retched and sprayed them, and Mabel laughed even harder when she was bombarded with green and yellow. They hopped off the couch, and Mabel grabbed a bag with golden confetti in it and chucked some into the air. "Comedy gold!" she shouted.
"All right, all right!" Stan said, sounding annoyed as he grabbed the cans of silly string and her bag of comedy. "Party supplies are now off-limits." She pouted. He was gonna be grunkle for "grumpy" if he kept this up.
Soos, who was actually helping, asked, "Mr. Pines, whose birthday is it again?"
"Nobody's. Thought this party might be a good way to get kids to spend money at the Shack." He unfurled a roll with a pin the tail on the donkey game. Meanwhile, the twins wandered over to the snacks to get a glass of soda.
"Nice!"
"The young people of this town want fun, I'll smother 'em with fun!"
Dipper, unscrewing the lid of the soda, deadpanned, "Maybe comments like that are why kids don't come to the Mystery Shack."
Antonio laughed, that unhinged look back in his eyes. "Oh, that's nothing. At least he's not saying he'll make a human sacrifice to the god of fun, and he'll use their grind-up bones as a euphoria-inducing confetti." Everyone stared at him in horror, and he shrugged. "That would be much worse."
Mabel paused. That wasn't one of the reasons she had a crush on the teen, that was for sure.
Stan, shaking off the weirdness of Antonio's words, finally noticed that Dipper was pouring her a drink, and he seized the soda and screwed the cap back on. "Hey! Hey! How's about you make yourself useful and copy these flyers?" He handed them a clipboard with a pink sheet of paper.
PARTY AT THE MYSTERY SHACK, it read. KIDS AND TEENAGERS WELCOME. And then, further below, next to some party hats and a deer, FREE?
"Oh, boy! A trip to the copier store!" she said excitedly.
"Calendars, mugs, t-shirts, and more! They got it all at the copier store," Soos said exuberantly. "That's not their slogan, I just really feel that way about the copier store."
"Save the trouble," Stan said, waving it off. "You know the old copier in my office? I finally fixed the old girl up. Good as new!"
Something about her doubted that, and sure enough, when Dipper pulled off the tarp, it was smoking and covered in ropes, cobwebs, and duct tape. It flickered with electricity, and she gasped at the bugs flying around. "Butterflies!"
Dipper looked at her oddly, though she didn't quite get why. He lifted it open and asked, "Does it even work?", which was a fair enough question. He poked a couple buttons, and as he looked at the sheet they were supposed to copy, his arm rested on the screen. There was a mechanical humming, and a bright green light scanned his arm.
They both stepped back, and with an explosion of smoke that had them both coughing, a sheet with his arm on it came out. She pulled it out with a smile and said, "Success!" Then it wrinkled in her hand, moving of its own accord, and she yelped, dropping it.
It fell to the floor, and after a moment, the arm came off of the paper, even coloring itself. They both screamed and jumped back even further, and it started to crawl toward them, zombie-style. "Stay back!" Dipper shouted, and he grabbed her soda and splashed it on the arm.
It dissolved to the bubbles, and then they both stared at the puddle of fizzing soda that was left. "Oh, my gosh. Mabel, I think this copier can copy human beings!"
She gasped, and saw the perfect opportunity. "Do you realize what this means?" She pulled out the can of silly string that Stan hadn't managed to take from her, and she retched it in his face.
She smiled, but he didn't return it.
It was later that night, and they were finished getting ready. They all stood at attention. "All right, party people," Stan said, "and Dipper." Her brother frowned from next to her. "Let's talk business. Soos, because you'll work for free . . . and you begged . . . I'm letting you be DJ."
"You won't regret it, Mr. Pines," the handyman said, looking excited. "I got this book that teached me how to DJ r-r-right." He held up said book, and Stan did not look impressed.
"Not encouraging," he deadpanned. "Wendy, you and Antonio are working the ticket stand."
Mabel froze. Her plan of spending the night with Antonio going out the window. "What?! But, uh . . . um . . ." She went a little red at how obvious she was being.
"I-I could work with Wendy," Dipper offered, and she grinned at him. Him having a crush on Wendy was super helpful sometimes, since it meant they could both get what they wanted.
Stan looked at him. "You realize if you do, you gotta commit to staying at the ticket stand with Wendy. No getting out of it, just the two of you, alone, all night."
At least, she was pretty sure that was what he'd said. The rest of them had stopped paying attention, and Wendy silly-stringed a face on Soos's belly and he made it jiggle. They all laughed, and Antonio took the can and added evil eyebrows, making them all basically roll on the floor with laughter. She literally did.
Then they went upstairs to get a little more dressed up. Dipper was there already, with a little bow tie on and everything. He was going to put on deodorant when he noticed her standing next to him. He yelped. "What?" he demanded.
"Uh, uh, I can work the counter with you, Wendy!" she said mockingly. "Let's kiss! Mmm . . . mmm . . ." She mimed making out with someone.
He fired it right back. "What?! But, uh, uh, um, uh, Antonio!" he mocked, and she went a little red. Maybe she should stop making fun of him for that, since he had just as much ammunition. "You can laugh all you want, but I've devised a plan to make sure my night with Wendy goes perfect." He fixed his bowtie and shot a finger gun at himself.
"Plan?" she asked, her stomach sinking. "Oh, you're not making one of those overcomplicated listy things, are you?" she moaned.
He scoffed. "'Overcomplicated'? Let me just . . . All right, fold that there . . . okay . . ." He unfolded a massive sheet of paper, and with a frown, she sat on the floor. He always did this! Why couldn't he just . . . do it? "Step one: Getting to know each other with playful banter. Banter is like talking, but smarter."
"That sounds like a dumb idea for poop-heads," she informed him, rolling her eyes.
"Yeah, see, this isn't banter. This is what I want to avoid with Wendy. The final step is to ask her to dance." He started staring into the distance, and she already knew he was daydreaming. "If I follow steps one through eleven, nothing can get in my way."
"Dipper, you're the one getting in your way," she told him, annoyed he couldn't figure it out. "Why can't you just walk up and talk to her like a normal person?"
"Step nine, sister . . ." He showed her and pointed to it, though it didn't fill her with a ton of confidence, since the one below it said, "Describe how she smells", which was disturbing, to say the least. She rolled her eyes again. "And you might wanna use this, too. It would help you get close with Antonio . . ."
She shook her head. "Nope. I'll do it my own way, the Mabel way!" She stood up very suddenly, pointing upwards, and she accidently poked him in the face. He yelped. "Ack! Sorry."
Then they headed downstairs, and the party was pretty cool. She'd gotten as dressed-up as she could be, with fancy clothes, leg warmers, triangle earrings, and a big ribbon around her head. Even Stan was dressed up, though she mentally shuddered at the peek of chest hair, remembering the disaster from the other day.
"Can your uncle throw a party or what?" he asked. "And if anyone wants to leave, I'm charging an exit fee of 15 bucks!"
She laughed evilly at that, then looked around. Antonio wasn't there yet, so she figured she should go dance, and she was out there, rocking it, cheering herself on, when she got a drink of water, only to find two girls sitting near her, one of them with a lizard. "Wow! You've got an animal on your body! I'm Mabel."
"Hi, I'm Grenda," the one with the lizard said in a very deep voice. "This is Candy." The other girl waved, and Mabel noticed there were forks taped to her fingers. Intrigued, she asked, and the smaller girl demonstrated, poking the popcorn. It got on the forks.
"Improvement of human being," she said in a Korean accent. Grenda fed a bit of popcorn to her lizard, and they both laughed.
Mabel's eyes went wide, and she smiled. "I've found my people."
"Remember, dudes, whoever, um, party hearties . . . what? . . . gets the party crown!" Soos held up a pretty crown with pink jewels. "Most applause at the end of the night wins!"
She gasped, and Candy and Grenda murmured their amazement. However, something else happened. A spoiled-looking rich-looking girl walked up with two goons and said, "Party crown? I'll take that. Thank you very much," with the valley girl accent and everything.
"Who's that?" she asked.
"The most popular girl in town: Pacifica Northwest."
"I always feel bad about myself around her."
"Uh, I can't just give you the crown. It's sort of a competition thing."
Pacifica laughed. "Honestly, who's gonna compete against me? Fork Girl? Lizard Lady?" She laughed patronizingly and gave the mic back to Soos.
Mabel watched her two new friends clutch each other sadly, and determination filled her . . . and then it promptly disappeared, because at that moment Antonio wandered over and she saw what he was wearing.
A white collared shirt that went really well with his darker skin tone. A little black bow tie, similar to the one Dipper had been wearing. A golden vest that shimmered as she looked at it. And he'd even fixed his curls a little bit, so they were just the right amount of wild.
Okay, yeah, she was basically drooling, but he didn't seem to notice. "Hey, girls, are you okay?" Grenda shook her head and pointed to Pacifica, and when he saw her, his face immediately set in annoyance. "Ugh. Entitled rich white girls. Somebody oughta put her in her place." He glanced at Mabel and raised his brows. Apparently, he already knew what her plan had been before he showed up.
"I, uh . . ." If she spent the night partying as hard as she could, she couldn't get to spend the night with him! But on the other side, people like Candy and Grenda were being hurt by Pacifica's insults, and she really did need to be taken down a peg. Her determination filled her again, and Antonio smiled and nodded like he'd expected it.
She strode over to where Pacifica and Soos had started arguing over the crown again and excitedly said, "Hey! I'll compete!"
Several people in the crowd gasped.
She turned to Pacifica and held out her hand. "I'm Mabel."
Instead of shaking the hand, Pacifica just rolled her eyes and said, "That sounds like a fat old lady's name."
"I'll take that as a compliment."
Pacifica rose to the challenge and confidently said, "May the better partier win," even shaking her head from side to side a little. She snapped her fingers, and she and her buddies backed up into the shadows.
Mabel waved at her. "Nice meeting you!" Then the girls and Antonio walked up and she happily said, "She's going down."
Dipper was having a good time working the ticket stand, now that he'd let the banter drop for a little bit. He was practically grinning just from sitting next to her for an extended period of time.
"Whoa! Sounds like the party's gettin' nuts!" Wendy commented.
He could just make out Soos calling, "Let the battle for the party crown begin! Mabel comes out strong. Watch out, Pacifica!" They both watched his sister dance.
"I've gotta get in there!" she exclaimed. "Cover for me?"
He chuckled nervously. Covering for her would make her like him more, but it would also throw his plan for the night in the garbage. "Um, well, I—"
She just flicked his hat and said, "Thanks, man," and left. He blinked. Well, that made his choice easy. Still, he sadly looked inside at her dancing, and then down at his list.
He flipped the OPEN sign around, much to the frustration of the waiting people. "I'll be back shortly!" he said. "I'm sure Stan won't mind if I'm gone for a few minutes." He moved to step away, only to be immediately caught be the scruff of his neck.
He dangled there, questioning his life choices, while Stan demanded, "Hey! What are you doin', kid?! These suckers aren't gonna rip themselves off."
"Yeah!" one of the kids said.
"You promised. Remember?"
Of course he remembered, but in an attempt to be innocent, he asked, "I did?" Stan pulled out a recorder which said, in his voice, "I promise." He gaped and awkwardly rubbed his arm as Stan sidled away. He reluctantly sat back down and flipped the sign back around. So much for a fun night with Wendy.
He sighed. "If only I could be two places at once." The wind rustled the posters they'd photocopied, and the lightbulb went off in his brain.
About five minutes later, he was lying on the photocopier and powering it on. After a moment of smiling to himself, he commented, "I wonder if this is a good idea." But it was too late. It scanned him, and a moment later, there was a paper Dipper in front of him. The paper person turned around to look at him. "Whoa!" He paused. "I have a really big head."
They got in front of each other, staring at each other curiously. "So, uh . . ." they both said at once. "Ha! Sorry. You first. Stop copying me!" They both laughed, and Paper Dipper hit his elbow on a shelf while trying to slap his knee. "Ow! Ow! Funny bone." He rubbed it with a wince, and while his head was down, Dipper wrote a 2 where the pine tree would normally go on his hat.
"I will call you, 'Number Two.'"
"Definitely not," Paper Dipper said immediately, then thought. "You know what name I've always wanted . . . Tyrone," they both said at once, grinning at each other.
Dipper backed up. "Okay, Tyrone, let's get down to business. I'm thinkin' you cover me at the ticket stand while I ask Wendy to dance."
"I know the plan, buddy," Tyrone said.
They both unfolded their lists in sync, and Dipper narrowed his eyes at his clone, edging away. "Hey, we're not gonna get jealous and turn on each other like the clones in the movies, are we?"
"Dipper, please. This is you you're talking about. Plus, hey, you can always just disintegrate me with water," he said with a snap. They both pointed to their temples and said, "Yeah . . ." Then to each other's temples. "Yeah . . ."
That continued on for longer than he cared to admit.
Before long, Tyrone was working the ticket stand, and Dipper was at the party. He walked up to Wendy in a great mood. "Great news, Wendy. I got somebody to cover the concessions for me."
"That's awesome! You can hang out with me and Robbie."
His good mood abruptly ended.
"Robbie, you remember Dipper from the convenience store."
"Uh, no," the "edgy" teen said. "Yo, Wendy, check out my new guitar." He pulled said new guitar out and showed it to her, with a fancy lick and everything.
"Whoa, cool."
Dipper cleared his throat, trying to stop his gasp. "Don't you, uh, usually hang out with Antonio?"
She nodded. "Yeah, but he's having a ton of fun with your sister, and I don't wanna ruin that."
He went into a jealousy fantasy, with Robbie and Wendy dancing, and she punched him, and she wanted to get married to him. His cell phone ringing brought him away from his delusions, and he answered it. It was Tyrone. "Hey, buddy, it's me. You. I just had the same jealousy fantasy."
"We gotta get rid of Robbie if I ever want to dance with Wendy!" Dipper hissed.
Wendy called, "Hey, Dipper! We're gonna go sit on the couch. Meet us when you're done."
He gave her a thumbs-up and immediately went back to the phone and said, "Oh, no! They're sitting on the couch! We gotta think of something quick!" He glanced left and right, and he spotted Robbie's bike. "I got an idea."
"I got the same one. But we're gonna need some help."
One scan later, and Number Three was made. "And that's where you come in, Number Three."
"But what if Robbie catches me? I'll be all alone." That was a good point, so there was another scan, but there was a little explosion and a paper jam.
Tyrone hopped off the table. "Uh-oh, paper jam." He pulled out the paper, but it still came to life as a wrinkled Dipper spouting nonsense and laughing distortedly. Tyrone stared at him, disturbed.
Number Three complained, "Come on, you're not gonna make me partner up with him, are you?"
"Shh! Don't be rude," Tyrone told him. "Hey, buddy, hey. It's okay." Paper Jam Dipper pulled on his face and said a whole bunch of gibberish.
"Okay," Dipper said, "just one more clone."
"Always means forever," Pacifica sang. "Alwaaaaaaaays!" It was very high. And then, breathlessly, "Forever."
Mabel felt terrified.
"I used to sing like that . . ." Grenda said. "Before my voice changed."
"Pacifica pulls ahead!"
Pacifica handed the mic to Mabel sassily. "Try and top that. Oh, Grenda? By the way, you sound like a professional wrestler." And then she walked away, laughing at her own joke.
"I wanna put her in a headlock and make her feel pain!" Grenda shouted.
Antonio put a hand on her shoulder. "Hey, what's wrong with sounding like that? It just means your voice matches your sheer power," he said, grinning and saying the last words deeper. Then he turned to Mabel. "And you've got this, Mabel. Your enthusiasm is gonna take you to the top."
"Yeah! It's not over till it's over, sisters!" She grinned. "Watch this!" She ran onstage. "Soos! Give me the eightiesest, crowd-pleasingest, rock-balladiest song you got!" A song started playing, and she nodded. "Excellent. Don't start unbelieving, never don't not feel your feelings!"
The crowd cheered loudly, and when she looked at Antonio, his eyes were closed and he was mouthing to all the words.
"Now I'm gonna do a flip!" she screamed, and she attempted to do so, but she only landed on her face. "That was for you guys!"
She spotted Dipper talking to Soos, and a moment later Soos asked, "Dudes, would the owner of a silver and red dirt bike please report outside? It is being stolen right now."
And a moment later, Robbie was shouting out and running outside. Mabel narrowed her eyes. That sounded like shenanigans.
Well, she couldn't take care of that right now. She had a competition to win!
"Now we're gonna bring it down for a minute. Ladies, dudes, now's the time."
The music changed to slow dance, and she swallowed, glancing at Antonio as everyone found a partner and started dancing. Here it was. The chance . . . to ask him. She didn't know what to do! Candy and Grenda were dancing with each other, and Mabel and Antonio were the ones who were left.
She walked down off the stage and took a deep breath. "Antonio? I . . ."
He smiled at her and held out a hand. "Would you like to dance with me, Mabel?"
She nearly choked on her own breath and, not trusting herself to speak, she nodded. They got all close and started dancing, and she felt her cheeks heating up from being this close to his chest. He was a really good dancer, too.
"I . . . I like your vest," she said after a moment, when she felt like it was safe to talk without coughing and dying from embarrassment. "It's pretty."
"Thanks," he said easily, as if this dance wasn't totally awkward. There was a pause. "I like your earrings."
"Thanks."
They danced, and slowly, she started to relax. This was fun! She smiled and leaned up against him, and a moment later, the song ended, so they split apart. She noticed Pacifica staring at them, or, more specifically, at Antonio. In a very obvious way.
Mabel smirked on the inside. Ha! Pacifica had a crush too!
As a kind of test, she walked a couple steps away, pretending to not be paying attention, and sure enough, the rich girl walked up to Antonio. "Hey. What's your name?"
"Antonio," he said, looking a little surprised.
"Well, I'm Pacifica."
"I know. You're literally competing against—"
"Named-like-an-old-lady Mabel. Yeah. I noticed. Anyway, I was wondering, if I go bribe that guy over there to put another slow dance song on, would you dance with me?"
Mabel turned around just enough to see Antonio's usually light-hearted expression going sour. He looked at her in a way that suggested she phrased her next words carefully. "What did you call Mabel? You realize she's my friend, right?"
She scoffed. "Please. I can do much better than that."
His warning expression turned into one of slight anger. "No." She blinked, surprised. "You're not bribing anyone, and you're not gonna be talking to my friend that way."
Pacifica made a couple gibbering sounds like she was struggling to come up with words, and then she huffed and walked away. Mabel beamed. Antonio had stuck up for her!
Dipper was walking in circles with Tyrone, trying to figure out a way to get him to dance with Wendy.
"Oh, I agree," Tyrone said. "You can't just go and dance with her."
"The dance floor is a minefield! A minefield, Tyrone!"
"What if there's a glitch in the sound system?"
"Stan might get in the way!"
"Robbie might come back!"
"There's too many variables!" Dipper exclaimed. "We need help."
They exchanged a look, and many, many scans later, there was an army of Dippers planning. He hit his pencil against the oil lamp and called, "All right, Dippers, gather round." His army lined up, smiling at him. "Now's the time. You all clear on what to do?" They all nodded in unison, and the army of identical preteen boys marched out.
Number Ten went to go distract Soos. "Hey, Soos, look! A glowing dot!"
He turned on the laser pointed, and Soos said, "Oh, man, I am so glad I turned my head. That dot does not disappoint." His eyes followed it wherever Number Ten moved it, and he proceeded to try and catch the dot, just like a cat. Number Ten stuck in a new music disc and gave a thumbs up to the Dipper in the sky.
Number Seven returned it and stuck a pink sheet over the light before sending a thumbs up to the next Dipper, Number Five, who closed the blinds. Number Eight distracted Stan with a dollar bill on a fishing pole. Number Six pulled the rope, and Tyrone and Dipper looked up as the bell rang.
"There's your cue," Tyrone told him. "It's the perfect moment to ask Wendy to dance. Good luck, me."
"I don't need luck," he said confidently. "I have a plan." He patted his pocket and headed downstairs, going around the corner . . .
. . . only for his plan to immediately go to shambles.
There was Wendy, leaning against the wall, in the wrong place. "Oh, hey, man, what's up?" she asked when she saw him.
"W-what are you doing here?" he asked nervously. "I mean, wouldn't you rather be out on the dance floor, uh, in, like, exactly 42 seconds?"
"I'm just waiting for the bathroom," she said, gesturing to the door.
"Um, um, okay." He frantically looked at his plan, already sweating. "Uh, small talk, small talk, small talk . . ."
But she was the one who instigated it. "So, hey, let's say everyone at this party gets stuck on a desert island. Who do you think the leader would be?"
"I . . . uh . . ."
"I think I'd go with this lunatic." She gestured to a man in a suit, who'd taken off his jacket and was sweating himself a puddle from the sheer force of his dance.
Dipper laughed at the thought, and looked at his plan briefly before sticking it back in his pocket. "I'd probably go for stretch over there," he said, pointing to a very tall man. "Uh, because tall people can reach coconuts? But, uh, I feel like Antonio would start a separate little cult or something."
Wendy laughed. "Yeah. Hey, and speaking of tall, want to see something?" She pulled out her wallet and showed him a picture, covering a little bit. "Those are my three brothers, and I'm . . . boop!" She moved her thumb, showing that she'd been twice as tall as her tallest brother. Also, she'd had braces.
"Ha! You were a freak!" The words slipped out of his mouth before he knew what he was saying, and he covered his mouth, horrified.
But she just said, "Yep."
"You know, kids used to make fun of my birthmark before I started hiding it all the time," he said.
"Birthmark?" she asked with a growing grin.
He went red. "Uh, no, it's nothing! I-I . . . uh . . . why did I say that?!" he asked himself.
"No way, dude," she said. "Now you have to show me. Show me, show me!"
Embarrassed, he handed his cup to her, took off his hat, and lifted up the hair on his forehead, revealing the constellation-esque birthmark on it. "The Big Dipper!" she gasped. "That's how you got your nickname! I thought your parents just hated you or something." He put his hat back on. "Hey, I guess we're both freaks."
She extended her cup, and he blushed, picking up another one from the floor and sticking them together. They both laughed, and then the person came out of the bathroom. Wendy went in, and he smiled after her.
At least until there was the sounds of his army walking up from behind him.
"Hey! What are you doing up here?!" Tyrone demanded. "Number Ten has been distracting Soos for fifteen minutes! He's gonna get tired of that dot eventually."
In the distance, Soos called, "Never!"
"You won't believe it, guys," Dipper said. "I bumped into Wendy accidentally and things are actually going great!"
"That's nice, but not the plan," Tyrone replied. "Do we have to remind you?" All of them pulled out their plans and started talking at once.
He ran his hand through his hair. "Oh, man, you guys sound crazy. Look, maybe we don't need the plan anymore, ya know? Maybe I could just go talk to her like a normal person."
They all gasped in horror. Well, they were his clones, after all. "If you're not gonna stick to the plan, maybe you shouldn't be the Dipper to dance with Wendy," Number Five said. All the others agreed.
"Guys, come on," Dipper said. "We said we weren't gonna turn on each other."
"I think we all knew we were lying," Tyrone said, and he was seized by the Dippers. They pulled him to the floor and dragged him around the corner, back to the attic, where they proceeded to lock him in the closet.
"No, wait!" But it didn't work. They shut the door on him. He got an idea, and he said, "Aah! I can't breathe in here!"
"Yeah, you can!" one of the clones shot back. "Plus there's snacks and a coloring book in there for you!"
He sighed, sat on the floor, and started eating the cheese and crackers, trying to find a way out while also eavesdropping.
"Okay," one of the clones led, meaning it was probably Tyrone, "so now that Original Dipper, or 'Dipper Classic' is no longer fit for it, I nominate myself to dance with Wendy instead. I've been around the longest, so it should be me." Yup. Definitely Tyrone. "Right? I mean, logically. Logically, guys."
"Fair point, fair point," another clone said. "Counterpoint: maybe I should get to dance with Wendy because I've been around for the least." Ah, so that was Number Ten. Dipper started picking the lock on the door as quietly as he could manage.
"That makes, like, zero sense."
"You make zero sense!"
"Watch it!"
"Don't shove people!"
Then there was the annoying "Nyi-nyi-nyi-nyi" sound of Paper Jam Dipper. He screamed some more.
One of the clones, probably Tyrone, since he was the only one who actually liked Paper Jam Dipper, said, "Hey, you want some cheese and crackers, buddy?" There was a pause, and the sounds of struggle. Dipper managed to get the door open, and was sneaking out when Tyrone said, "Hey, guys? What would you do if you were trapped in a closet?"
"Break out," they all said simultaneously, and Dipper started running, now that his cover was blown.
He made his way into the dance area, and he spotted an oh-so-familiar red-headed teen. He tried to call, "Wendy—!", but he got cut off by one of his clones grabbing him and pulling him backwards. He faced the army.
"Come on, man, give it up," Tyrone said. "You're overpowered."
"Hold on, guys, think about it," he said in an attempt to gain time. "We're exact equals mentally and physically. If we start fighting, i-it'll just go on for infinity!" To his surprise, it actually worked, and they started to murmur about it, so he took the opportunity to punch Tyrone in the face. All the clones kind of stared at him for a second.
"CLONE FIGHT!" Number Nine screamed, and then it was all out war.
He managed to wiggle out of the chaos, but Number Ten called, "Hey! Classic Dipper's getting away!"
Dipper turned around with a seven taped on his hat and said, "No, friends. It's me, Number Seven."
The actual number seven screamed, "That's not me, guys, that's not me!"
The seven on his hat peeled to reveal the pine tree, and they went for him again. He backed up, pulling out a party poppers, but it was completely underwhelming. Except for the fact that the smoke triggered the fire alarm, which triggered the water, which melted the clones.
"Huh. How 'bout that?" he said, watching himself melt. Well, that was going to feature in his nightmares tonight.
He realized there was one clone who hadn't melted, Tyrone. "You!" said clone shouted.
"Uh-oh."
Mabel hopped around the dance floor, tired from her partying but still ready for more. Everyone cheered, and Pacifica looked down on her, disgusted.
"One more song, dudes, and then it's time for the bestowing of the party crown! It's gonna be the . . ." He pressed the bomb key, and smiled. "Nailed it."
"Pacifica, I just want to say that whoever wins, it's been a super-fun party," Mabel said, holding out a hand to the rich girl.
She clicked her tongue. "Aww. It thinks it's gonna win. Hey, did you hear that? People clapping for the weird girls? Yeah. Me neither." Mabel pouted, and Pacifica's dramatic walking-off was interrupted by Antonio stepping in the way.
"Hey, she's just trying to be nice," he said, and she went red. "You could at least be polite. Rivals don't have to hate each other's guts. It can be friendly, too."
She just huffed and stepped off to the side, but Mabel could see how embarrassed she was. "Thanks, Antonio," she said.
"No problem."
Tyrone put Dipper in a choke hold, and tried to punch him. "Say it! Say I can dance with Wendy!" he demanded.
Dipper escaped the hold and put Tyrone in a matching one. "Never!"
Then they heard Wendy laughing in the distance, and at the same time, they asked, "Wendy?" They both ran to see what was going on, and Robbie had come back and was chatting with Wendy. She laughed, and both of their faces fell. "We blew it, man," they said at the same time.
They both fell to the ground at the same time, and wore the same expression. "I don't know," Tyrone said. "Wanna go grab a couple sodas, or something?"
Dipper smiled.
"Let the party crown voting commence!"
Mabel stood proudly next to Soos, with Pacifica on his other side. "Good luck, Mabel," the rich girl said, then she narrowed her eyes at her.
"Applaud to vote for . . . Mabel!" He gestured to her, and she swelled with pride to see how many people were cheering for her, Antonio being by far the loudest. "Let's check the applause-o-meter!" He moved his arm over her head. "Oh . . . oh . . . pretty good . . ."
She beamed.
"And your next contestant, Pacifica!" There was some more scattered applause, but Pacifica narrowed her eyes and glared at the crowd, and it grew louder. Soos moved his arm for her, but something occurred to him. "Uh-oh," he said, holding his arms up. "A tie. This has, like, never happened before."
Pacifica glared, looking around for someone to bribe, and the smell of money was enough for Old Man McGucket. Soos moved his arm a little because of the change and said, "Ladies and gentlemen, we . . . we have a winner."
He looked down sadly, and so did Mabel.
"The winner of the contest is Pacifica Northwest."
She grabbed the crown and put it on her head. "Thank you, Jorge," she said. "Thank you, everyone! Everyone come to the after-party at my parent's boat!" She cheered, and everyone else did, too, and before Mabel knew what was happening, Pacifica was being carried out and the room was empty.
Mabel sighed and stepped forwards, towards Candy and Grenda, and Antonio. "Sorry I let you guys down," she apologized. "I understand if you wanna leave."
"But then we would miss the sleepover," Candy said, and Mabel frowned, looking up.
"The what?"
"We wanna call our moms and sleep over here with you," Grenda told her. "You're, like, a total rock star!"
"I have magazine boys!"
Antonio came up and playfully punched her in the shoulder. "You stood up for the losers, which means you came closer to winning than any of us could. Come on, that's awesome, Mabel!"
Her smile was so big that she thought she might permanently ruin her face.
"Maybe we don't have as many friends as Pacifica, but we have each other," Candy said wisely. "And, that's pretty good, I think."
"Do you wanna stay for the sleepover, Antonio?" Mabel asked hopefully.
He shook his head with a little smile. "Nah. I'm gonna be needed elsewhere. But hey, the party's not over till it's over, am I right?"
She grinned and called, "Soos! Play another song! This thing's going all night!"
"Way ahead of ya, hambone!" He stuck another disc on, and the four of them partied like no one had ever left.
Dipper sat with Tyrone on the roof, and he handed a soda to him. "Some night, huh?" his clone asked, looking up at the stars. A shooting star passed overhead. They opened their sodas in unison, and Dipper sighed.
"You think we even have a chance with Wendy?" he asked. "I mean, she's fifteen, we're twelve."
"I dunno, man," Tyrone said. "I hope so, but we're making zero progress the way we're doing it. The only good conversation you had with her was when you didn't do any of that list stuff."
"I know. Mabel was right, I do get in my own way."
"Literally!" they said at the same time.
"Whoa," Tyrone gasped, and he made a little explosion sound at the realization. They drank their sodas at the same time, but soda was a liquid, and Tyrone was paper, so that didn't end up so well. "Oh, boy. Don't look now."
Dipper glanced over at his quickly melting clone. "Tyrone!" he shouted.
"It's okay, dude. I had a good run. Remember what we talked about."
"O-of course!"
"Hey, and quit bein' such a wimp around Wendy, okay? For my sake!" And he disappeared into a puddle, the two on his hat being the last thing he saw.
Dipper fell to his knees. "Tyrone!" He picked up his soda in a toast. "You were the only one who understood." Then he poured some soda down as a sacrifice before heading back down. Stan was cackling and counting his money, the girls and Antonio were having a good time, and Wendy was nodding along to the music off to the side.
He moved to go in, but before he did, he took a look at his list before tearing it up. He didn't need no plan. He dusted his hands off and went inside.
"Dipper, where've you been?" Mabel asked. "Meet my girlfriends!"
He didn't know if he had a shot with Wendy, but it looked like Mabel was doing pretty good herself.
All right, so . . . sorry about the hiatus, I was on vacation for a week, and I also have my other fic that I'm working on and real life to deal with (ugh), but we're back! I think Double Dipper is probably one of my favorite episodes, I don't know why, but I love it. Anyway, see you again real soon!