Title: Three Days
Author: SpikesLittleBit (AKA Joss is Boss, or hpjossisboss)
Pairings: Remus/Sirius
Rating: PG-13 to mild R
Word Count: 4304
Summary: Sirius initiates a challenge on Remus which ultimately backfires.
Author Notes: Please oh please be kind, as this is my first Remus/Sirius fic. Ok, real notes, this takes place during the summer between their 6 & 7th year at Hogwarts, and the pair are staying with the Potters. Peter isn't there, I don't know why. I must give credit to my darling beta, Chels because some of the beginning Remusness is from her. This actually started as part of a RP we are involved in at GJ, and I just decided to elaborate on it. I really hope you all like, considering I'm pretty much pants at summarys and AN's and I'm probably going to end up on that list of horribly bad fic summaries. :D

Archived: As of right now, just at and Padfoot's Stash LJ and RemusxSirius LJ

Three Days

for Chels

Remus Lupin could never quite understand why he woke up so early every morning, especially during the summer. He knew that he hadn't any reason to be awake at first light, yet his eyes were open and his overgrown feet had dragged his gangly form into the kitchen for his morning tea. After steeping the pot and pouring himself his first aromatic cup, he sat down at the breakfast table nestled comfortably within the confines of the Potters' household.

Three, perhaps four hours, he thought to himself. Three or four whole hours all to myself. That's all he needed really. A few short quiet hours before James and Sirius would awake and the house would be practically trembling in fear of whatever summer debauchery they would have up their sleeves. He blew against the surface of his cup and took a sip, not realizing he wasn't the only one awake. He heard footsteps descending the stairs and rolled his eyes.

Sirius.

Sirius padded heavily into the kitchen, the portrait of a dream filled night, his pajama trousers wrinkled at the bottoms from sleeping sprawled across his bed, his already shaggy hair thoroughly mussed from tossing and turning. He blearily rubbed his eye with the heel of his hand as he crossed past where Remus was sitting to the counter.

"Mornin'," he said with a yawn. "There coffee?"

"Would it kill you to make your own?" Remus asked exasperatedly as he took another sip.

"Berk," Sirius muttered as he set about making a pot of coffee. He blinked and glanced over at Remus. "What time is it anyway?"

"It's 5," Remus answered, "why are you up? You'd think with all that racket coming from your room that you'd still be sound asleep."

"Dunno," Sirius replied as he took his filled cup to his lips and sat down opposite Remus. "Just… woke up, I suppose. And I do not listen to racket. You're really starting to sound old, my friend." Remus shot Sirius an annoyed glare from over his teacup. "Why're you up?"

"I always wake up this early. You know that." Remus pursed his lips and set his cup down as Sirius quirked an eyebrow. "And it is racket. There's no way you could call that noise music."

"Again. Remus. Shorts. Tight," Sirius drawled.

"Again. Sirius. Shorts. Fine."

"If you say so, mate," Sirius muttered as he took another sip of his coffee. "If you ask me, you're in a bit of denial about your shorts being wound just a bit too tightly. You should try a day without them."

"Hmph," Remus grunted as he began to turn his cup aimlessly in his hands. "And just what would you know of it?" Sirius furrowed his brow and set down his cup.

"I haven't worn underwear in two years," Sirius pronounced with a pointed look. "Where have you been?" Remus flushed a bit at this revelation. He knew that Sirius was always a bit of an exhibitionist, but he had always supposed (or at least hoped) that Sirius had at least a little bit of dignity.

"Hm…" Remus managed trying to cover up his slight embarrassment as he took another sip of tea. He glanced up just to see a slight smirk forming at the corner of Sirius' mouth. "What?"

"Nothing," Sirius replied casually. "I just think that you could do with a bit of freedom, that's all. I'm sure your bits would properly thank you for it." Remus almost choked on the teaspoon of liquid in his mouth before he managed to swallow it.

"I do believe," Remus began, "that would take freedom to an entirely different level, altogether. No, I think I shall prefer to keep my shorts on, Sirius." He met Sirius' wicked gaze, and inwardly reminded himself just how much trouble Sirius' wicked gaze had garnered over the years. Sirius took a sip of his coffee.

"Your loss, mate," Sirius drawled over his cup, wriggling an eyebrow.

"Berk," Remus retorted quietly. Just as he put his cup back on the table, a strange sensation overcame him. It was as if there was a draft breezing around him, and then the realization occurred to him as he looked up to find Sirius twirling his now absent shorts around an index finger as he casually took another sip of his coffee: Sirius had been working on his non-verbal spell casting.

"Alright, that's enough," Remus demanded. "You've had your fun, now give them back. This is positively uncalled for, even for the likes of you." There was a soft POP! and the shorts disappeared from Sirius' hand, his grin almost malicious.

"There's a nice unopened package of Gorant Glooby's Truffly Fudge, which I know is your favorite, in the bottom of my trunk. If you can go without for, let's say three days? you can have it and your precious shorts back." Sirius put down his cup and propped his elbows on the table, resting his chin on his hands. "What say you?"

"It's cruelty!" Remus exclaimed as softly as he could so as not to wake the Potters. "It's madness! It's indecent! I won't do it. You give them back. This. Instant." Sirius merely waved a hand in the air as he rose to refill his cup.

"Tis not cruel," Sirius replied, "and it's not indecent if you're still in your trousers." Remus narrowed his eyes, a burn of anger rising through his skin.

"You can be so… so… irritating, you know that!" Remus raged. Sirius simply let out a soft chuckle and padded back across the kitchen for the stairs.

"Three days, mate."

"Today should count!" Remus said gruffly as Sirius reached the doorway.

"Remus?" Sirius said. "It's 5:30 in the morning. Of course today counts." With that, he started up the stairs, sipping his coffee and leaving Remus alone in his discomfort.

After supper, Remus retreated to his makeshift room in the Potters' den, muttering curses to a not-present Sirius. He sat down rather harshly on the hide-a-bed and continued to fume over the events of the day.

Remus had returned to his quiet quarters after cleaning up both his and Sirius' messes in the kitchen to find not only the shorts he had been wearing missing, but every pair of his shorts had disappeared. When James had finally emerged from his room, apparently Sirius had caught him on the stairs and told him of the wager, for Remus distinctly heard James call, "Brilliant!" rather loudly. It was also painfully obvious by the shared smirks between the two black haired boys at Remus as they forced him to play quidditch with them in James' backyard. There had been mutterings over lunch and supper, as well as smart remarks coming from Sirius all afternoon. At last, Remus was allowed to finally escape to the confines of his room without having any argument from his two evil friends.

"I'd like to show them one day," he said aloud to himself. "Sirius, at least."

What would piss Sirius off more than anything?

"Well," he said aloud, again to no one in particular, "he rather likes to hear himself talk, I could Silence him, but that would just wear off in an hour or two, and then I'd have to listen to him whine about that. Owling his mum is out or the question, as that's going a bit far, and she probably wouldn't care at any rate."

What happens when Sirius tries to get a rise out of someone, and it fails?

The thought shattered above Remus' head as if a light bulb had just exploded. Sirius always sulked and pouted for days when he pulled a prank that got no immediate reaction. Because to Sirius, it wasn't worth it if there was no contrasting reaction. He swung his legs up onto the bed and lay back against his pillow, his hands behind his head.

"That's it," Remus said to himself with a grin. "I'll pretend it doesn't bother me. I mean after all, it's only three days. I could go three days." He sighed and closed his eyes, still smiling.

"Remus, you're bloody brilliant!"

Much to his own surprise, Remus woke later than usual the next day. He stretched and took a look at the old alarm clock on the end table. 8:30. He closed his eyes again, thinking it would be alright to have a bit of a lie in, but the enticing scents wafting in from the kitchen told him that it would be foolish to try to go back to sleep.

He sauntered into the kitchen to find Sirius and James sitting at the breakfast table, each sipping a cup of coffee while Mrs. Potter stood at the stove stirring a skillet of eggs.

"Ah, there's the sleepyhead," James said, breaking the silence.

"Ready for day number…" Sirius trailed as he held up two fingers and took another swig from his cup as Mrs. Potter began setting plates down in front of the boys. James stifled a laugh as he picked up a piece of bacon and popped it into his mouth.

"Coffee or tea, dear?" she asked Remus, who pointed at the teapot in response. She gave him a warm smile, poured him a cup of herbal tea and set it down in front of him. Remus simply shrugged at the pair as he took a sip.

"It could be worse," he said casually.

"Yeah, You could have taken all his books and chocolate, too," James mused, elbowing Sirius conspiratorially. Remus tried to conceal a small smile as he stabbed a bit of egg lightly.

"I'm only saying that there are more dire situations than being without one's shorts," Remus replied, earning a slightly shocked look from Mrs. Potter. "Don't look at me, it's their fault."

"I resent that!" James exclaimed. "I, for once in my life, have absolutely nothing to do with this." She quirked an eyebrow at Sirius, who had busied himself digging into his plate of eggs and bacon, avoiding her look.

"You boys are going to be the end of me," she sighed with a shake of her head as she picked up her teacup and left the three to their breakfasts.

Remus inwardly smiled the rest of the day at how well his little strategy was going. He hadn't quite made Sirius squirm yet at the prospects that his plan was doomed for failure, but it was only a matter of time before the sulking would begin. He had noticed that slowly but surely, Sirius had grown quieter and quieter towards him. Perhaps he had started to sulk, perhaps he was just thinking. He couldn't really decide which, and it was growing too late to try and figure it out.

He changed into his pajamas and laid down on the hide-a-bed, a hand tucked behind his head. He blinked a few times and let out a sigh. Too many thoughts were wrestling in his mind for him to ultimately drop off to sleep.

One more day.

"One more day," he repeated to himself aloud. "Then this whole bloody mess will be over, I'll be one package of Gorant Glooby's richer, and I'll have my shorts back."

Are you so sure about the shorts bit? He sighed and shook his head.

"Just because Sirius Black has the stones to walk around without a shroud of decency between his pants and his privates, doesn't mean that I should as well," he answered himself with a furrowed brow.

Tell me you've never thought about it before… Sirius… walking around decency free? Remus let out a grunt of frustration and turned on his side. That the thought never crossed your mind?

"It bloody well hasn't," Remus protested to himself. But the thought of Sirius walking around unfettered kept swimming at the front of his mind. It was starting to become inevitable: his inner voice was driving him nutters.

I'm beginning to concur that you very well may be enjoying this, yourself. Remus turned again to his other side, clutching at his pillow. He closed his eyes, hoping against hope that his inner voice would fall asleep too, and that his newfound freedom, as Sirius had put it, was only temporary.

Remus awoke early again the next morning. His thoughts had seemed to subside sometime in the night, and the visions that had plagued him had recessed into the back of his mind. He padded to the bathroom and showered, not one single thought entering his mind, much to his joy. He returned to his makeshift room, a towel draped around his hips, a second being rubbed against his damp hair. He stretched and cracked his neck, dropping the towel he was drying his hair with into a chair.

Day three, his inner voice reminded him in a singsong voice. Whatever will you wear to celebrate?

"Shut it," he told himself. He sulked over to his trunk and opened the lid. "Sodding hell," he groaned. His trousers were all in the laundry, and he was left with only a pair of jeans. He pulled them out of his trunk and examined them with a sigh. He couldn't even begin to muster how he was going to keep up the pretense in a pair of constrictive jeans. He shook his head and cursed himself before slipping them on, allowing the towel from around his waist to drop on the floor. He padded over to the mirror on the wall of the den and took a good long look.

It's not that bad.

"Not that bad?" he asked himself. "How in all of Merlin's name am I supposed to walk in these?"

But his inner voice did not answer. The visions of Sirius walking around in jeans had awoken and began to flood his mind. For once, he wished that the voice would come back and shoo away the image of Sirius removing said jeans to step into the shower. He closed his eyes, willing that it would all stop, but it just made the visions that much more clear. He sighed as he opened his eyes again to regard his gangly form in the mirror, wearing naught but a pair of slender jeans.

"Fuck."

Sirius reluctantly sauntered into the kitchen to find Remus at the breakfast table already showered and dressed, sipping his morning tea and reading a book. He gave a great yawn and padded over to the counter to find the coffee already made.

"You made coffee?" he asked in bewilderment.

"Mhmm," Remus replied as he turned a page, trying not to regard the fact that Sirius was there. Sirius pulled a cup from the cupboard and filled it. "Figured I'd be nice to you, day three after all." he drawled evenly.

"Huh?" Sirius asked as he turned around and took a seat at the table. "Oh. Right. Day three." He took a sip of his coffee and took in the sight of Remus. Remus could tell that the gears in Sirius' head were starting to turn, and by the expression his face wore, he was completely flummoxed. The inner voice inside his head began to laugh. He glanced up for a moment before marking his page and closing his book. He picked up his cup with his long deft fingers and began to turn the cup in his hands.

"You know, Pads," Remus began casually, "I'm thinking that this wager is rather silly. I mean, I think I've learned a viable lesson. I never really thought about how uptight I was until having gone through this experience." He paused, making sure that Sirius was mid-swig before continuing. "I don't think I'm going to have much use for my shorts after today." Sirius choked a bit on a mouthful of coffee before managing to gulp it down without spitting it across the table.

"Come again?"

"You were right," Remus said, a playful grin creeping across his lips. "This has been exactly what I needed. Thanks, mate!" He patted Sirius on the back as he rose from the table, gathering his teacup and his book. "I think I'm going to spend some time down by the pond reading." He took in a refreshing breath and exhaled as he remarked, "Lovely day," and headed out the back door, leaving Sirius with his jaw hanging wide open.

Remus spent the day inwardly laughing at himself at how much this whole ordeal was starting to make Sirius squirm. After spending a good deal of time by the pond in solitude, reading his book, he made it back to the house for lunch, in which Sirius sat at the table in a foul mood, refusing to speak with anyone, even James. Later on, they tried to get Sirius to join them in a game of Exploding Snap, but Sirius just huffed and stormed up the stairs, slamming his door shut.

"Whatever it is that you did to make him cross with you, Moony, I do believe it's working," James mused with an amused chuckle.

"Just giving him a taste of his own mischief, I'm afraid," Remus drawled as he dealt the cards.

At supper, Mrs. Potter remarked at the change of personalities in the two boys, in which Sirius huffed and Remus beamed. His little plot had worked like a charm, but somewhere deep inside his belly, he knew that it couldn't last forever.

After supper, they retired to the sitting room to listen to the Cannon's quidditch match on the Wireless. Mrs. Potter sat in a poufy chair as she worked on her embroidery as Mr. Potter read the Daily Prophet, and James and Remus had become engorged in a game of wizard chess. As Remus' queen viciously overthrew James' knight, Sirius let out another soft growl of frustration and retreated upstairs to his room.

"I wonder what's upsetting him," Mr. Potter observed, drolly oblivious.

Remus retired to his room after thoroughly decimating James' chess set with a small pang of guilt in his gut. He never meant to go this far with it, and never meant for Sirius to be this angry with him. He knew that Sirius deserved it of course, but still, his convictions kept him from feeling any true animosity about it.

"It was only a silly bet," he told himself. "He won't be upset with me forever." He padded back to the mirror again and took a hard look at his reflection. He pursed his lips in annoyance and furrowed his brow.

"It really wasn't all that bad," he told himself, "after I got used to it and all." He heard a soft knock on the door and tore his gaze away from his mirrored self. The knock sounded again, a bit more persistent the second time. He took another quick glance toward the mirror before sighing and going to the door, opening it cautiously. There, sulking and defeated, stood Sirius holding two bundles.

"Here," he said, pushing the packages into Remus' arms, not crossing the threshold into the room. "You win, mate. You can have your sodding shorts back."

"I, er…" Remus stammered, "thank you. Would you like to come in for a bit?" he added, opening the door a bit wider. Sirius looked past him for a moment into the room and shook his head.

"Nah," he replied gruffly. "I'm going to turn in for the night. Enjoy the fudge." Sirius turned and walked away from the door, Remus staring after him. He glanced down at the packages in his arm. The smaller, he suspected, was the fudge, which he placed on the end table near the hide-a-bed. The larger one was wrapped in brown paper and tied with a bit of twine. He sat down on the edge of the bed and unwrapped it to find his supply of clean, neatly folded shorts. He let out a sigh again as he took the package and set it in his trunk.

"No thinking tonight," he told himself aloud. "Better not to think on this at all." He unbuttoned his shirt and laid it neatly on the chair next to the mirror and looked at himself once again. He took in every scar across his middle and his arms and shook his head. "No thinking."

He went back to his trunk and rummaged around until he found a pair of pajama bottoms and grabbed a pair of shorts from the package. He held them for a moment in his hands, thumbing the threadbare cotton.

"Fuck it," he muttered to himself as he tossed the shorts back into his trunk, slipped out of the jeans carefully, pulled up the pajama pants and stepped back towards the bed. He turned down the covers and tucked himself in, taking a deep breath, muttering "no thinking" once more before drifting off to sleep.

Remus awoke surprising late the next day. He supposed that he had slept too soundly and didn't realize that the sun had come up. He took in a great deep yawn and stretched as far as his arms could stretch before throwing back the covers and hesitantly climbing out of bed. He padded down the stairs to find James and Sirius sitting at the breakfast table, just as they had on the second day, sipping coffee and thumbing through the Daily Prophet.

"Morning," Remus yawned as he sauntered over to the counter. He pulled a cup from the cupboard and filled it with coffee. He turned to regard the glare that Sirius had fixed on him. "What?"

"Mind if I have a word, mate?" Sirius said through gritted teeth. He stood from the chair, crossed over to Remus and took the cup from him, almost slamming it on the counter. He grabbed Remus' elbow and began to lead him out of the kitchen and up the stairs. He opened the door to his room and practically threw Remus inside.

"What are you on about?" Remus demanded as he rubbed his elbow where Sirius had dug his fingers in. "Are you mad?"

"What am I on about?" Sirius barked. "What are you on about?"

"I haven't the slightest as to what you are referring, Sirius," Remus replied. He could feel the anger pouring off of Sirius, and he would not have been afraid to admit that it was starting to frighten him.

"Why are you still rubbing this in my face, Moony? You won, alright! Now go put your goddamned shorts back on!" Sirius howled. Remus just blinked at him, thoroughly perplexed until he realized that he hadn't put them back on the night before when Sirius had brought them back to him. He shook his head and let out a soft chuckle.

"Sirius, this is ridiculous," he managed before Sirius had grabbed him by the scruff of his neck and crushed his mouth against Remus' lips. His eyes remained open in shock for the majority of it, but Remus finally told his inner voice to fuck off, closed his eyes, and began to return the kiss, just as fevered and hungry as Sirius. When they finally broke apart, both were panting heavily and at a loss of words. Finally, Remus cleared his throat and attempted to break the silence.

"Sirius, I-"

"No. You have no idea how agonizing these past two days have been," Sirius began. "I never thought that it would go that far, that you might actually…" he paused for a moment, a pleading glimmer in his eyes that Remus had never seen before, "enjoy it."

"Sirius…"

"Let me finish, Moony," Sirius barked as he ran a hand through his hair. "And then, and then you had to parade around yesterday in those fucking jeans. Do you have any idea why I kept running up here all day?"

"Well, I thought you were just cross that I had gotten the better of you, for once," Remus replied quietly.

"I CAME UP HERE TO WANK, YOU SOD!" Sirius shouted, cupping his hand to his mouth, realizing that they weren't the only ones in the house. He took a deep breath and continued. "I came up here to wank and get it out of my system, because I know I shouldn't be thinking things like this. And now here we are, day four, and you're still not wearing your bloody shorts, and I just can't take much more of this." He paused once again, waiting for Remus' reply, and found Remus quietly furrowing his brow. After several moments Remus finally spoke.

"Really?" he said softly. Sirius let out a nervous chuckle.

"Yeah, really," Sirius said with a small smile as he ran his hand through his hair. "And if you don't go downstairs and put on a sodding pair of shorts, I'm going to have to kick you out to wank again." A small smirk began to creep across Remus' lips, and he crossed his arms playfully.

"And what would happen if I didn't particularly want to go downstairs and put on a sodding pair of shorts?" Remus remarked drolly as he stepped towards Sirius, closing the gap between them. "Then what would you do?" Sirius let out a barking laugh and shook his head.

"I may just have to start humping your leg, you git," he mused and pulled Remus into another kiss, this time harder and more fiery than before, walking the pair of them towards the wall, his hands beginning to explore the scars and wonders of Moony's skin. Remus quickly pulled back as Sirius began to grind his hips against him, a few staggered breaths escaping his mouth as he looked into Sirius' silvery eyes.

"What about James?" Remus whispered. Sirius quirked an eyebrow and smirked.

"Sod him," Sirius replied with a teasing shrug. "Let him steal Lily's knickers on his own."

FIN