I've rushed this out because the previous chapter was painfully short. Sorry to keep you guys waiting for some action. Hope this makes up for it.
Irrevocable Decision Part 9
They sat at a table furthest from the stage yet still their ears were assailed by the loud country music that was produced by a group of four musicians belting out a rhythmic beat on their two violins, guitar and big bass whilst a mass of swirling dancers wreaked havoc on the dance floor.
Watching his face, the woman twirled her glass then making up her mind leaned close so as to be heard and stated, "I never took you as one who needed his hand holding, Jack."
He winced at the observation but had already spotted Jacob approaching their table. His eyes passed the Tokra and alighted on the person following closely behind. She stood out even here, her height setting her apart but it was something else that kept Jack's eyes riveted to her, making Olivia turn to see what had caught his attention.
"Ahh," she whispered knowingly.
He was drawn against his will to her eyes which were just as blue as the first time he'd met her and just as...no, there was no light of challenge shining in them now; they were just pissed and looking for trouble.
Jack had been in the eye of a sniper's sights more than once but right at this moment he was feeling uncomfortably vulnerable as Sam's visceral gaze pierced him with a venomous glare. Warily he stood, nodding to the two latecomers, muttering their names whereas Olivia in stark contrast reached out a welcoming hand stretching over to give both Sam and Jacob a kiss on the cheek and a warm smile.
"Glad you could make it," she beamed and casting a tolerant look over the proceedings, explained, "It's a little hectic to the eye and ear right now but it's fun and in an hour or so things start to mellow."
"Sounds good to me," enthused Jacob taking his seat and remembering times long past when he'd whirled Sam's mother round a similar dance floor, revelling in the excitement and energy supplied by the musicians and dancers alike.
A waitress appeared and orders were taken so Jack took the opportunity to cast his ex 2IC a sideways glance.
She was no longer hurling metaphorical daggers his way, but was instead observing Olivia with a slightly puzzled frown on her forehead. It was quickly erased as she felt Jack's eyes on her and she dropped her gaze studying something on the table with her whole attention.
As the evening progressed, Jack found himself actually relaxing. He hadn't quite realized how relieved he was that they were conducting themselves in such a civilized manger and unwittingly he fell into the trap of believing his last minute plans were going better than expected. A relaxed arm thrown casually over the back of Olivia's chair portrayed a territorial possessiveness that Sam had tried hard to ignore, avoiding looking anywhere in his direction, which was a little difficult when Olivia was chattering away to her. She tried not to think of the alarm that had shot through her when she'd dirst spotted this familiarity by her former C.O. or the sick feeling that had twisted her stomach into painful cramps.
"How long have you known Jack?"
A line appeared on Sam's brow as she cast her mind back three years to that auspicious moment when she had stepped into the briefing room and had come face to face with Colonel Jack O'Neill, throwing him an exemplary Air Force salute and taking no small delight in the stupefaction on his face.
"A little over three years." She gave a tight-lipped smile and reached for her tonic water. She couldn't trust herself with alcohol tonight she had decided but was beginning to regret her decision. She held onto her glass staring into the tonic water's clear depths, shaking the ice and remembering a time when ice had brought her and the colonel closer together on two different levels.
"So are you managing to cope without him?"
It was a question which, Sam knew, had been asked jokingly and innocently. Sam had decided, albeit reluctantly, that she liked Olivia against all her emotionalprejudice and this wasn't a tricky interrogation to make her feel uncomfortable. Her lips moved slightly and for a moment she allowed her eyes to rest on the lean figure in question.
"You learn very soon in my line of business not to get attached to a colleague. The very nature of the job means constant changeover. You get used to a scribbled goodbye note or a hasty one-line e-mail." Her voice had tightened as she spoke and feeling Jacob's hand surreptitiously rubbing her arm, she forced herself to take in a breath and smiled shyly as if to take the bite out of her next words, though Jack knew differently. "No one is ever indispensable – there's always another to fill the empty place."
And then to her intense relief, they were chatting about the latest hockey games and Sam was able to sit back and go on autopilot so that she could apply all her senses to appearing relaxed and content, a far, far cry from what she was actually feeling.
"Dance?"
She was jolted from her glazed state by an unfamiliar voice in her ear, too late realizing the voice had been speaking to her. Startled out of her little world she raised wide eyes to a pair of dark brown eyes smiling expectantly down on her. Only they weren't the eyes she was – she kicked herself hard under the table furious with herself.
"S..sorry…..I….I didn't ----." She wanted to curl up and simply disappear. That would be fine. She was acting like a tongue twisted adolescent asked out on her first date, and to make matters worse she could feel the hot flush begin to creep up her neck and face.
"Care to dance?" an equally warm voice repeated. It belonged to a tall, dark eyed cowboy, his Stetson set at a rakish angle. Anyone else wearing such headgear would have been given a hard time by Sam who considered it a definite poseur's item, but this man certainly looked the part and without realizing it she found herself returning the smile and even more surprising, she found herself rising to her feet and allowing herself to be led onto the dance floor.
The next half hour was a kaleidoscope of movement, music and laughter as Sam found herself whirled, literally, off her feet.
When, at last, she cried for mercy and a respite, she was reluctantly returned to her table by chocolate brown eyes which openly revealed their admiration. As she sank gratefully into her seat still breathing heavily from her exertions, her dance partner dropped his head close to hers and drawled in her ear, "Darlin', don't get too comfortable 'cos I'll be back. You can count on it."
As a deeper pink stole into already bright cheeks, Sam eyes met Jack's, and she couldn't help but notice an incredulous eyebrow raised so high she felt sure he'd been taking lessons from Teal'c.
"Seems like you've got yourself an admirer, Sam," Olivia spoke appreciatively. "You should be flattered, that's Josh Morgan; he's considered highly eligible in these parts, wouldn't you say, Jack?"
Cool, dark eyes bore into her whilst a cynical twist to his lips had Sam cringing. "Wouldn't know about that," he muttered, swallowing the irritating cough that had been threatening to rattle his lungs all evening. He shoved his chair back with a little more force than was necessary then turning to Olivia asked, "Dance?"
The ranger actually looked surprised but covered it up by rising with speedy enthusiasm and as Sam watched, Jack took Olivia's hand in his own before he wrapped an arm round her waist and escorted her to the floor.
"You okay?"
The gentle voice of her father was almost her undoing. She couldn't face his barely concealed pity so she rolled her too bright eyes at him dramatically, sucking in a deep breath to calm her frayed nerves. Locking her jaw in grim determination she nodded, unable for the moment to bring herself to speak. When she felt her equilibrium return enough so as not to disgrace herself, she said, "Dad, I'll be setting off back in an hour or so. The weather report isn't looking good for tomorrow – I'd better get on the road before it's too late."
"Is it a good idea to drive through the night?"
At last she smiled, shaking her head. "I'm a big girl now, remember?"
He shook his head fondly, a trace of sadness behind his blue lined eyes, "You'll always be my little girl."
A derisory snort had Sam's eyes shooting up, a gleam of anger narrowing them as she realized Jack had returned and heard the last part of the father/daughter conversation.
"Lost your partner, Jack?" Jacob asked flippantly, not in the least concerned to be overheard being sentimental with Sam.
Turning his head he indicated the stage where Olivia had now joined the other musicians and was playing a lively piece on the flute. "She's holding down a second job."
"A talented lady, Jack." Jacob spoke admiringly. "Little wonder you escaped back here," he joked pointedly but Sam had already looked away and did not see her ex CO frown and turn his attention to the label on his beer bottle.
"I don't know about you people, but I'm going to have another drink. Sam?" She raised her tonic to request a repeat whilst Jack also nodded indicating a refill.
Silence even amongst all the noise was palpable at the table. Neither of the two members of SG1 appeared willing to start a conversation. Yet it was Sam who decided this was her only opportunity to get some finalization on the subject. As her reserved side warred with her more volatile and repressed inner self, victory was awarded to the latter as she launched herself into a hostile offensive.
"Was it worth it?" The question was sharp enough to make Jack flinch.
"Was what worth it?" Shit! His attempt at nonchalance didn't sound too great even to his own ears.
"Of everyone I've ever known you have always assessed every possible risk before any undertaking." Her large eyes full of accusation drilled into him but still she hesitated. "Before you left, did you take everything into account?"
She felt as if she were holding her breath as she stood face to face with him, but like a slap in the face his answer was returned without a moment's hesitation, his "Yes," softly spoken but firm.
In a heartbeat he had destroyed the offer she had provided for him for a way out and as the blood drained from her face she forced a cold smile to her lips and said with no little effort, "Then I'm glad for you."
Pushing back her chair, she stood on legs that she wasn't sure would hold her, then as if remembering something important she turned back saying accusingly, "You could at least have told me to my face – I deserved that small consideration after all we'd….." Her voice faded and she shook her head as if annoyed with herself and her loss of control.
"I believe General Hammond gave you the details, Carter. I should have thought that would've been good enough," he said cooly. "Anyway, you know the Air Force - here today gone tomorrow."
Furious with hiscool, flippantattitude, Sam pushed against the barrier he had so carefully erected. "I...I just somehow thought that we were different. Didn't thethree years we worked together mean anything to you?" Her eyes were full of reproach cutting into Jack's armour. His defences attempted to rally.
"We?" Sam winced at the dry stress put on that word, her eyes clouding painfully. "I didn't realise I was required to clear my movements through you, Major." He stressed her title scathingly and saw the results as a hot flush coloured her pale features as she struggled to hide her distress.
"I….I thought—."
If this didn't end soon, Jack knew he was going to lose it. So stabbing the air between them with his index finger,his clipped words flayed her, "Your trouble is and always has been that you think too much, Carter." His dark eyes, flat and cold, raked her mercilessly hoping to overwhelm her with his own verbal attack because he knew full well that if she was ever able to gather her thoughts together she might just be able to shoot him down in flames.
As a myriad of emotions raced across her face, Jack went in for the coup de grace knowing full well he was being a first class bastard.
"It'sreally verysimple, Carter – just get it into your skull! I've had enough of saving the world. I've had enough of getting shot, captured and tortured. So I decided to get off the rollercoaster ride we were on and do some 'real' living before it was too late."
The shock and emotion were so clearly evident in her eyes that Jack felt a stab of remorse strike him with apowerful intensity, yet the fear of having to make another traumatic decision like the one that had almost blasted Daniel to smithereens was intolerable. He could not, would not go through that again. After Charlie he had known he could never allow anyone or anything to get close to him again – and what had he done? He shook his head in disgust at his own weakness, still aware that the thunderous beating of his heart was telling him something entirely different.
"'Scuse the interruption."
Jack's frown deepened as he looked away from Sam's shell shocked expression. Josh Morgan had appeared at Sam's side, hat in hand, his perfect white teeth smiling appealingly.
"But you looked as if you might be leaving, so I just--."
With a suddenness that surprised even himself, Jack's hand shot out and took a firm hold of Sam's arm.
"Sorry, Morgan, the lady's already taken." As he moved to the dance floor he felt Sam's resistance, particularly when she realized that a slow, romantic piece of music had started, but his grip tightened perceptibly, urging her on.
She felt her temper rise as he turned her to face him and took her in his arms, but as she felt his body lean into her own, Sam had to close her eyes in an agony of distress. Dreading that he should see what she was feeling, what she knew would be revealed in her eyes, she kept her head lowered her body stiffly reluctant as they moved on the floor amongst the other couples.
'This is ludicrous,' she chastised herself attempting to jerk out of Jack's hold,but it was as if he could read her mind as his arms wrapped more tightly round her, pinioning her against him.
"Let go of me!" she demanded softly through gritted teeth.
"Aw c'mon, Carter, don't tell me you've never pictured the two of us doing this," he taunted, pulling her even closer into his body.
Sheswore under her breath,her face twisting into an ugly mask of pain.
"Truly, my momma would argue that one with you, Carter. But does your daddy know you use such language?" he chided her and realizing she was about to burst into heavier expletives he jerked her against him cutting off her reply and in a low, menacing voice he uttered, "Trust me when I say it doesn't suit you, Major."
She snorted, her blue eyes widening in disbelief. "And what would you know about what suits me?" she demanded spitefully. She meant her words to cut and hurt him and felt a perverse pleasure at the shadow she saw cross his face.
As the slow melody came to a close she pulled away, throwing him a last furious glare before striding away. He stayed still, watching her until she was lost in the crowd at the bar.
"You're a damned fool, Jack"
He spun on his heel and scowled at Olivia.
"Excuse me?" he sounded pissed and rounded on her indignantly.
"You can't hide away forever."
"I'm not," he snapped and walked back to their table, Olivia following. She was not put off by his show of temper and continued to voice her disapproval.
"Are you going to let her leave like that?"
"Olivia!" his warning growl made little impression on the woman, particularly when it was accompanied by a harsh hacking cough.
"If you can't see she's half way crazy in love with you, then--."
Abruptly rising, Jack interrupted, "I don't want to hear this." And he marched off.
"Go stick your head in the sand," she called to his stiff back, "but don't blame me when your ass gets bitten good and hard!"
(Go to Chapter 10)