Disclaimer: All still apply. Joss is boss, I'm just borrowing. No money in it, just reviews and joy. Just trying to keep the show alive in my own way.

Author's Note: A little long, but I hope this brings everyone up to date with the story. I had fun writing it.

Bad Day

River was huddled against Jayne in his bed. Jayne's massive arms and torso all but covered her lithe form, serving almost as her blanket. A single white sheet covered both of their bare forms from the waist down. Her smooth white skin contrasted the tanned roughness of his. Both of their faces bore the look of contented slumber. It was morning on Serenity, and almost time for them to wake, but not yet.

River's eyes suddenly opened wide. Unwrapping herself from Jayne's arms, she slowly sat up and stared. She didn't actually stare at anything in particular. It just seemed as if she was looking through the walls of the ship for something. Her head stopped once she seemed to find whatever it was she seemed to be looking for. She cocked her head to the side for a moment, and then her eyebrows rose in recognition. She swiftly turned to the still sleeping Jayne and started shaking his shoulder, saying urgently, "Jayne! Jayne!"

Jayne stirred for a moment, but did not wake. River shook him harder using both of her hands on his shoulder this time and yelling, "Jayne! Wake up!"

Snorting, Jayne lifted his head and half opened his eyes, saying a little too loudly, "Huh? Wha…wha' 'tis it?"

Turning his head to River, Jayne opened his eyes a little more and a broad smile stretched across his face. He reached out a hand and cupped the side of River's face. He said, "Mornin', sexy."

River reached up and held Jayne's hand against her face. Looking calm, she said, "Lover, Simon is awake."

Jayne looked at River curiously and asked, "That's okay, ain't it?"

"No," she said shaking her head, "He is awake and he is looking for me."

Alarmed, Jayne asked, "Why? What for? I thought he was done worryin' on you."

River looked in the general direction of Simon's position outside the room and then looked back at Jayne. "He wants to tell me something, something important."

She looked away again, and Jayne tried to follow her eyes. She continued, "He asked Kaylee a question, a very important question."

Swiveling her head back to Jayne, River said excitedly, "He asked her to marry him!"

Jayne's eyes widened and he said slowly, "Well that's good, but…"

"He woke up early to tell me, but I wasn't in my room. He checked the infirmary, the cargo bay, shuttle two, and the galley. He's worried now. Not many more places I could…," River blinked, then said more insistently, "…should be."

Jayne's eyes had grown wide as River listed most of the other sections of the ship. Thinking as fast as his sleep addled mind would let him, he said, "Well, we still can getcha on the bridge."

The sound of quick footsteps passing outside of Jayne's bunk and heading up to the bridge nullified that thought. Still, River shook her head and said, "It's too late." She looked in the direction of the bridge.

Down to his last desirable option, Jayne hurriedly said as he sat up, "' Nara 's shuttle! Yeah, you been spendin' some time with her. You jus' say ya been with her all night."

Shaking her head, River said resignedly, "Simon just thought the same thing. He's having Zoe call her right now."

"Tai-kong suo-yo duh shing-chiou sai-jin wuh duh pee-goo!" Jayne exclaimed as he lowered his head and shut his eyes tightly. He beat his fist against the mattress.

River turned back to Jayne, cupped the side of his face with her hand, and said comfortingly, "Distress is not necessary. We knew this would happen. Secrets are difficult to keep, but we have allies."

Jayne rolled over and swung his legs off the bed with a sigh. "I was jus' hopin' we wouldn' hafta cause a fight, 'tween Mal and Simon and everybody. We's all been happy."

River moved up behind Jayne and wrapped her arms around his shoulders. Resting her head on his shoulder and speaking gently into his ear, River said, "The Captain and Simon will be upset, but they will accept our situation in time. The crew is strong enough to withstand their grumpiness for that period."

"How long will that be?" Jayne asked rhetorically.

"Four days," River answered simply. Jayne turned his head and looked at her incredulously. Looking back, River said, "It's the longest period of time the Captain can stay angry. Simon can only last two."

Then she tilted her head to the side and gave Jayne one of her loopy little smiles as she said, "Besides, Kaylee will sabotage the engine until Simon and the Captain promise not to harm you."

"Ya think she'll do that?" Jayne asked humorously.

"I know it," River answered confidently.

Jayne laughed. "Good thing we're landin' today. Sure hate to be stuck again."

Jayne's look at River became more meaningful. "We's all been happy. I been real happy and I don't want none of that to go away."

"It won't," River assured.

"You's the best thing that done happened to me, ya know," Jayne continued slowly, "and I want to do right by ya, and since your brother's now thinkin' a marryin', I…"

River put her fingertips to Jayne's lips and he stopped speaking immediately. There was a pause, and River said, "We can talk about this later, because…" She turned and looked at the hatch. There were three sharp knocks, and she looked back at Jayne, saying, "It's time."

"Jayne!" a voice said through the hatch. It was Mal.

"Yeah, Mal!" Jayne shouted back calmly, which belied the queasiness in his stomach.

"It seems that River has gone and made herself hidden," Mal said, "The Doc and I was wonderin' if you might come out and help us find her."

Jayne was pulling on his pants as River picked up her dress from the middle of the floor. "Why me?" Jayne asked with feigned gruffness.

There was a pause. "Well, the two of you have been getting along recently, so we thought you might know some of the places she might hide."

River pulled her dress down over her body and then looked over her shoulder at Jayne. She smiled and winked at him. Jayne wondered why she had to look so sexy doing that. Forcing himself back into reality, Jayne pulled on his shirt and said, "Alright, I'll be right out."

While slipping on his boots, Jayne looked to his sidearm hanging on the wall. River placed a hand on his shoulder, and whispered, "You won't need it."

Jayne looked back at her, and she continued, "Also, let me go first."

Rising, Jayne nodded, and kissed her lightly on the lips. They hugged each other for a moment, and then River led the way to the ladder. River climbed up, opened the hatch, and exited meeting the gasps of everyone who stood outside. Jayne paused for a moment then followed.

Exiting his bunk, Jayne seriously expected to have a flying fist impact squarely on his jaw once he turned around, but that did not happen. Instead, Jayne turned around and saw the rest of the crew standing in the passageway. River stood in front of him facing Mal and Simon. Simon was to the right of Mal, and Zoe was to the right of Simon. Kaylee and Inara were on the other side of Mal with Inara being closer. Mal looked contemptuous, Simon looked confused, Zoe and Inara looked calm, and Kaylee looked shocked.

Through his clenched jaw, Mal somehow managed to ask Jayne, "Jayne, what in the gorram sphincter of hell was my pilot doing in your bunk?"

Jayne opened his mouth to speak, but River beat him to it. "I was sleeping with him."

Mal didn't even look away, but continued to glower at Jayne amid the renewed gasps of everyone else. Veins popped out of Mal's neck and he clenched his fists until his knuckles were white. Jayne tried to remain calm, but he still shivered slightly from Mal's glare.

Leaning to take a step towards Jayne, Mal was held back by Simon. "Captain," Simon said, "I'm sure she didn't mean it the way you think. River may have simply meant that she was only sleeping in Jayne's bunk, not that she was sleeping with him."

Rolling her eyes at him, River said to Simon, "I was sleeping with him the way you sleep with Kaylee."

Kaylee made a small noise before covering her mouth and turning a bright shade of red. Simon likewise blushed, but maintained his gaze with River. Zoe carefully moved behind Simon, as Inara stepped closer to Mal. Simon slowly shook his head saying, "Nooo…"

"Yes," River said sharply with an equally sharp nod.

Simon was dumbfounded for a moment, and then he looked at Jayne, who by this time was looking back at him. Rage quickly built on Simon's face and his body tensed. Seeing this, Zoe grabbed Simon's arms and locked them behind his back. Mal tried to use this opportunity to renew his advance against Jayne, but Inara threw herself in front of him.

"Mal, no," she said calmly but forcefully.

Looking down at Inara, Mal asked, "Why in hell not?"

"They didn't do anything wrong," Inara said bolstering herself against his heated glare.

"They didn't!" Simon shouted as he struggled futilely against Zoe. "Jayne had sex with River, a seriously traumatized little girl! Can you imagine what this will do to her! How far it'll set her back!"

"Fei hua, Simon!" Kaylee shouted silencing him. "She ain't lookin' upset about what they done, and you also been sayin' how she's much better 'cause of him."

Kaylee then stepped beside Inara and said to Mal, "I'm with ' Nara . Ain't nothin' wrong."

From Kaylee and Inara, Mal turned his head to Zoe, and sternly asked, "Zoe?"

Zoe looked at Mal, then forced herself around Simon before releasing him and taking a stand beside River. "I agree," she said calmly. "Nothing's wrong."

Both Mal and Simon looked at the defiant wall of women between them and Jayne in silent disbelief. Jayne did so as well, wanting to say something, but not sure what. It was Simon who spoke next.

"Are you all insane!" he raved. "This is Jayne Cobb! The Man-Ape gone wrong! The power hungry lunatic who is constantly trying to take over the ship! How can you possibly defend him?"

Ignoring Simon, Zoe said to Mal, "It's a little crowded in here, sir. I suggest we move somewhere more appropriate, say, dining area?"

Simon tried to say something more before Mal clapped a hand down on his shoulder and nodded at Zoe. "Dining area."

Jayne and River entered the dining area together holding hands. They were followed by Kaylee, Inara, and Zoe. Simon and Mal entered last. Jayne sat at the head of the table nearest the engine room as River sat to his right continuing to hold his hand. Kaylee sat next to River, followed by Inara, and Zoe sat on Jayne's left. Simon took his seat across from Inara, while Mal stood at the head of the table with his arms folded.

"The first thing I want to know," Mal said in a loud, controlling voice pointed at Jayne, "is how long this has been going on between you two."

"Two weeks," River said.

"Thank you, Albatross, but I prefer to hear it from Jayne himself," Mal said in a softer tone. He looked back at Jayne and asked resuming his previous voice, "Is that true?"

"Yeah, Mal, it's true," Jayne admitted.

"So, what you're sayin'," Mal said as he took a few pensive steps to his left, "is for the past two weeks, you both been sneakin' around my ship, and, ah, engagin' in this activity."

"Yeah," Jayne said expectantly.

"Why!" Mal barked as he shot Jayne a menacing glare.

"Well, 'cause we knowed you'd be actin' like this," Jayne quickly answered.

"Like what?" Mal asked turning back to face Jayne.

"Like I done ruined your prized possession," Jayne said struggling with the last word.

Mal was taken aback. Shaking his head he said, "I most certainly am not…"

"You are," Inara interrupted. "You have been treating River like your own personal good luck charm ever since the Miranda Wave. You act like she belongs to you and you alone."

"I do not, I have not," Mal said indignantly glaring at Inara.

"Albatross, Mal," she responded. "It's supposed to be a ship's good luck, remember?"

Mal furrowed his brow at Inara as he tried to find a response. Inara looked back at him expectantly. Then Mal turned and stepped back over to his seat, muttering something under his breath.

"There's another issue here," Simon said heatedly. "Jayne is taking advantage of River."

"I ain't takin' 'vantage of no one," Jayne growled matching Simon's glare.

"She's a teenage girl!" Simon shouted.

"I'm a woman!" River shouted back.

"You don't even know what that means," Simon admonished as he turned to River.

"Woman," River said calmly. "A female human that has reached full natural growth or development."

There was silence, and then Kaylee asked sternly, "Well, Doctor?"

"Well, what?" Simon asked uncomfortably.

"Has she stopped growin'?" Kaylee asked defiantly. "You're her doctor, you should know."

Simon hung his head. "Yes," he said lowly.

"An' I happen to know she's been gettin' her 'monthly visits'," Kaylee continued. "So's I think that takes care of development."

Mal visibly cringed at the phase "monthly visits". Simon looked up and tried to regain the offensive.

"But you're only speaking physically, not emotionally," he pleaded.

"Emotionally," Inara cut in, "she has been stable enough to pilot the ship, and even well enough to get us out of some difficult situations."

"An' I don't think a one of us has seen her have an episode since Miranda," Kaylee chimed in. Everyone motioned their agreement, albeit Simon and Mal did so grudgingly.

"But Jayne," Simon ventured trying a new approach, "how could she possibly…"

"How could she like such a ge zhen hundan?" Kaylee asked spitefully.

"Hey!" Jayne said indignantly.

Kaylee continued unabated, "Well, I dunno. Could be somethin' like an upright Core doctor decidin' on marryin' a lowly ship mechanic from the Rim."

There were astounded looks on the faces of Inara, Mal and Zoe. Simon slumped back in his chair realizing that he had done it again. Kaylee maintained a seething glare at Simon. Inara placed a hand on Kaylee's shoulder and gently pulled her back into her chair. Looking at Simon, Inara said, "It's likely your sister knows us all better than we know ourselves."

Inara looked to River and Jayne, and continued, "I imagine she sees something in Jayne that the rest of us are unable to."

Jayne and River then smiled and nodded at one another. Mal finally turned back to the table and looked at Zoe. "Zoe," he stated, "you knew about this."

Looking up from the spot on the table that she had been staring at for most of the time, Zoe said, "Yes, sir."

"And you didn't feel the need to tell anyone?" Mal asked as he placed a hand on Simon's shoulder.

"Didn't feel it was anyone's business but theirs, sir," Zoe answered giving Mal a hard look.

Mal bit back anything else he was planning to say. He looked around the table, nodded to himself, then straightened up. "Alright," he said, "fair to say we've all learned some things this mornin' that none of us were plannin' to. Clearly, none of us is feelin' too happy about it, neither. But, we're going to be breakin' into New Canaan 's atmo here in little more than an hour and we all got plenty of work to do."

Looking at River, Mal asked, "River, do you think you can tear yourself away from Jayne long enough to get us down?"

River looked up and nodded. Mal then continued, "Good, then I need you on the bridge."

Placing a light kiss on Jayne's lips, River stood up and exited towards the bridge. Simon cringed which caught Mal's notice. "Doctor," Mal said, "Jayne and I will be dropping of MacGrude's cut once we get down. Now, we've dealt with him before, so we know him to be a mite shifty. It wouldn't hurt to have the infirmary prepped just in case."

Simon gave a look to Jayne at the mention of 'just in case'. Mal clapped his hand on Simon's shoulder, and glared at him. "'Cause if something happened to Jayne, there's no tellin' what your sister might do."

Looking back fearfully at Mal, Simon gulped, and then nodded. He rose slowly and left through the aft exit not daring to take a look at anyone else. Kaylee scowled after him. Picking up on this, Mal said to Kaylee, "How's the port thruster on Inara's shuttle?"

Looking startled at Mal, Kaylee said, "Nearly fixed!"

"Well, I think she needs it all fixed before she heads out to her appointments," Mal said glancing at Inara. "You do have appointments, don't you?"

"As if that is any of your business, but yes, I do," Inara said in her normally cool manner.

"Then I suppose you'll be needin' to prepare for them," Mal said with a sarcastic look.

"Of course," Inara said indifferently as she nodded to Kaylee. They both rose and left through the forward exit. Mal watched them leave.

"So what d'ya want me and Zoe doin'," Jayne asked.

Snapping out of his reverie, Mal turned back to the remaining members of his crew in the room. "You both prep the Mule," he said. "I'll be on the bridge watchin' us land."

"Sir," Zoe said as Mal turned to leave.

"Zoe," Mal said as he made an impassive look at her.

"Sir, we need to pick up some supplies while were down. I'd like to head into town when we get a chance."

Mal thought for a moment and then looked back at Zoe. "You can pick them up while Jayne and I are out," he said, "and take River with you. She won't be doin' much 'til ' Nara gets back."

Later, Jayne was sitting in the cargo bay strumming on his guitar. The landing had gone flawlessly much to River's credit. Kaylee had fixed Inara's shuttle in time for Inara to fly off to her appointments. Mal and Jayne met up with MacGrude, and after some "negotiation", convinced him to take the percentage that he had already agreed to. Simon applied the necessary weaves to the minor cuts and scrapes that Mal and Jayne received. Inara had waved them that she was on her way back. They were just waiting on River and Zoe to return from town.

Footsteps came up from behind Jayne, and he looked to see Simon and Kaylee walking up from the passenger dorms. Simon moved somewhat reluctantly, but Kaylee pushed him along encouragingly. Turning to them, he set down his guitar on the weight bench and asked, "What're you two doin'?"

With a final push on Simon, Kaylee said, "Simon's come to apologize."

"Kaylee, I…" Simon started hesitantly.

"Simon!" Kaylee said to him with an earnest look.

Simon paused for a moment and the docking arms for Shuttle One could be heard extending. Looking up, Kaylee said, "Ooo, ' Nara 's back."

Looking at Simon, she said, "Now you apologize 'fore I get back."

Simon nodded and she ran off to climb the forward staircase. Simon turned to Jayne slowly and sighed a couple of times before speaking.

"Well, Jayne," he said heavily, "I've been thinking about what we said this morning, and I realize that River is not a child anymore. She also has been much better emotionally, and I think you have something to do with that."

Jayne smile at this, and Simon felt encouraged as he continued, "I think she has had a positive affect on you, too. You have been much easier to work with, and I don't think you have called me something derogatory in the last month."

"Derogo-what?" Jayne asked.

"A bad name," Simon explained. "I'm just saying that I'm sorry I was upset with you this morning."

"S'alright, doc," Jayne said as he placed a hand on Simon's shoulder. "Think I mighta done the same if'n I caught some fool ruttin' around with my sister."

Simon then smiled broadly and said, "Well, I guess this has an added benefit for you."

Jayne looked at him curiously and asked, "How's that?"

"At least you don't have to pay River to be nice to you," Simon laughed.

Anger flared in Jayne's eyes as he hurled his right fist around and caught Simon's left cheek. Simon spun to the ground as Jayne yelled, "She ain't a whore!"

"Simon!" Kaylee screamed as she ran to him from behind Jayne. Inara followed and stood between the two men.

"What happened?" Inara asked Jayne.

"Doc, called his own sis' a whore," Jayne said angrily.

"I did not," Simon said weakly as Kaylee helped him up. "I just said that he didn't have to pay her to be nice to him."

"Near enough," Jayne said. Inara rolled her eyes and shook her head.

"Oh, Simon," Kaylee said comfortingly, "where'd he hit ya?"

Simon pointed to his left cheek.

"Did he hit ya on the other side?" Kaylee asked.

"No," Simon said as he shook his head.

"Good," Kaylee said. Then she slapped his right cheek and stalked off to the passenger dorms. Simon stood stunned for a moment, and then chased after Kaylee pleading profusely.

"Jayne!" Mal shouted as he came down the forward stairs into the cargo bay.

"He started it!" Jayne yelled defensively.

"Jayne, get Vera," Mal said as he approached.

"What's wrong?" Inara asked.

"River and Zoe aren't back yet," Mal said seriously.

"Maybe they's got held up getting the supplies," Jayne offered.

"Not likely," Mal said looking at Inara, "I've been tryin' to raise them since you called. Inara, did you fly over the town on your way in?"

"Yes, Mal," she said nervously. Jayne sprinted off to his bunk.

"Did you see anyplace where someone's likely to get bushwacked?"

"Well, it's mostly flat grassland," Inara said desperately trying to remember the details of her flight. Inara's eyes then went wide with fright as she said, "But there was a small stand of trees just outside of the town. It was next to the road, they would have walked right by it."

"What d'ya think it is, Mal?" Jayne asked as Mal drove the Mule down the road. "Slavers?"

"Don't think so, Jayne," Mal said. "I don't think slavers could've got the drop on Zoe, let alone River."

Jayne thought for a moment, then asked, "How's someone get the drop on a reader?"

"Don't rightly know," Mal anwered as the stand of trees came into view, "but I imagine we'll find out."

Jayne readied Vera as Mal increased the throttle. They approached the stand at high speed, then stopped suddenly and jumped from the Mule. Jayne and Mal then sprinted with guns drawn to the edge of the trees, taking cover behind two of them.

"See anything?" Mal asked Jayne.

"Nothin'…wait, there!" Jayne said as he pointed to a prone form lying further inside the trees.

Mal saw it and ran over while Jayne covered him. It was Zoe. She was laying amidst strewn boxes and canned goods.

"Zoe, Zoe!" Mal shouted as he shook her. "Can you hear me?"

Zoe didn't respond. Jayne ran up as Mal turned her over. "Tamade," Jayne said, "She's beat all to hell."

Mal check her for a pulse. Looking at Jayne he said, "She's got a pulse, but it's weak."

Jayne, however, was more interested the ground. "She was dragged here," he said.

"What?" Mal asked and watched Jayne as he followed a trail back to the road.

Jayne stopped and turned back to Mal. "They fought here!" He yelled.

"Who?" Mal asked.

"Zoe and a man," Jayne responded, "Heavy. He came from behind this tree."

"What about River?" Mal asked.

Jayne continued up to the road. "She fell here!"

"She what?" Mal asked incredulously.

"Fell!" Jayne shouted back and looked down again. Then he said, "They picked her up."

"They?" Mal asked completely confused.

"Heavy guy and another. He's lighter," Jayne said before walking off the road. He walked around a few trees then stopped. Looking for a moment, Jayne ran to Mal.

"They had a wagon," Jayne said. "Maybe some local helpin' 'em out. They was waitin' over there. If we go, we can catch 'em."

"Jayne!" Mal shouted irately, "Have you forgotten about Zoe right here?"

Jayne looked down at Zoe and dumbly said, "Oh, yeah…"

"Now help me get her to the Mule," Mal ordered as he looped his arms underneath Zoe's shoulders. Jayne wrapped an arm around both of Zoe's legs, and the two men lifted her. Mal led the way back to the Mule.

"What's your plan then?" Jayne asked Mal as they cleared the trees.

Mal answered, "Get Zoe back to the ship, have the doctor bring her around, and find out who's dealin' the cards here."

Looking at Zoe's condition, a thought hit Jayne. "What if the doc can't bring her 'round?" he asked. "What then?"

"Doc'll bring her around," Mal said sternly. "He's got to."

Jayne stopped as they were within reach of the Mule. "Maybe he can't, though," Jayne said strongly. "Maybe she's too far gone for him to help."

"What are you saying, Jayne?" Mal asked angrily.

"I'm sayin', Mal," Jayne said as reasonably as he could, "that if we gotta choice between a dyin' woman and a fresh trail, I say we take the trail."

"I ain't leavin' her," Mal growled.

"I ain't askin' ya to," Jayne said. "Let me go after River."

"Jayne, I ain't losin' more crew to these hundans. Now help me put Zoe in the Mule."

Jayne dropped Zoe's legs and stepped towards the Mule. Mal put the rest of Zoe down quickly and carefully before jumping in front of Jayne and shouting, "What the hell are you doin'!"

"Goin' after River!" Jayne shouted back. "I ain't leavin' her, neither!"

Mal grabbed for Jayne's coat, but Jayne blocked his arms and punched Mal across his jaw. Mal tumbled to the ground. Jayne stood shocked for a moment. He then turned to Zoe and reached into her coat. He picked out her talk box and noted that it was still working. He then climbed into the Mule and started it up.

Suddenly, there was a metallic click to his left. Jayne froze as he heard Mal say, "You try to take that Mule, and I will kill you sure as I'm standin' here."

"Mal, I gotta do this," Jayne said keeping his eyes forward. "I can't just let 'em take her, she's the best thing that ever done happened to me. She's the first woman I knowed that ever wanted Jayne Cobb for Jayne Cobb. And she wasn't ashamed of me. God Mal, she makes me want to do things right even if'n I don't know how, and I want to do right, now. Mal, you can call the ship and get ' Nara 's shuttle here, it's faster anyhow. Doc can come with her, too. I got Zoe's talk-thing and I'll tell ya what I find."

Mal continued to hold his gun on Jayne.

Jayne slowly turned his head and stared down the barrel. Calmly he said, "This is how it is. I love her, Mal. If you don't want me to go after her, then shoot me."

There was a pause as they stared at one another.

"Well," Jayne said as he hit the throttle and sped away. Over the roar of the engine would have sworn he heard Mal say, "Good luck."