Chapter Five

I don't own stargate atlantis. Don't sue.

A/N: Sorry it's taken so long everyone. I've been sick...still am actually so I'm a tad behind in my writing. Hope you enjoy. Thanks to my lovely beta as always. :)

Five hundred. That was the number of weak breaths John Sheppard had counted Rodney take before his friend finally opened his eyes.

Twenty. The amount of minutes that John had been sitting on the hard, jagged floor holding this friends trembling hand, praying for him to wake up. Telling himself that Rodney would be fine...John had been after all. Then the doubts had crept in, whispering all the things he didn't want to think about. But you got hit in the shoulder John? What if the hit to Rodney's stomach did more damage? What if it hurt Rodney's heart. What if the blast that hit Rodney was stronger? That's when he had decided it was time to count. It got his mind to shut up at the very least.

He had been about at the end of his rope when Rodney's limp fingers had abruptly tightened around his and his eyelids had begun to flutter.

"Hey there buddy? How are you feeling?"

Rodney blinked at him and looked around the dim area, his forehead pinched in pain. "What...oh that's right. I remember." He closed his eyes for a few seconds and took several deep breaths. "So I guess we didn't make it to the Stargate?"

"Nope. But we will." John tried to sound encouraging. He gave his team mate one last squeeze before releasing his death grip on Rodney's hand to grab a canteen.

John supported Rodney's still tense lower back and lifted the water to his friends dry lips. Rodney took several sips and smiled a thank you as John set the canteen back on the ground.

"So." Rodney started.

"So." John shot back.

"Another life threatening situation for us to laugh about later."

John felt some of his anxieties of the past thirty or so minutes fade to the background. Some. " I'd give that a yep." John patted Rodney's back and took a drink himself.

Rodney groaned and rubbed his neck, he had managed to move to a sitting position and was struggling to get more comfortable.

"Comfy." John quipped as his friend quieted down and settled for sitting Indian style on the rocky ground.

"Oh yes. My bed in Atlantis has nothing on this. I love sitting on top of pointy rocks."

"I'll remember that next time we forget to bring enough sleeping bags on a mission." John let out a small giggle at Rodney's expression.

"I'm just kidding McKay. We could share."

Rodney grimaced in a "I just kissed my mother" face. " I'll take my chances with the rocks."

"I'm wounded. Really." John flashed the puppy dog eyes that had melted many individual hearts. Including his parents.

Alas, Rodney was immune. " Save it for one of your groupies Colonel."

They both laughed at that one.

"So you up to getting home?"

"If it means not getting shot again, I'm up for it."

John flinched. He knew it was only meant as a joke, but it felt like he'd been punched in the gut. Rodney noticed.

"Colonel I didn't mean-"

"Don't worry about it."

Sometimes this scientist could be too smart for his own good. "You are." Rodney crossed his arms and had the look of a man ready to stand up to a firing squad.

Not now. John just couldn't get into this now. The guilt and pain were still too raw, and he hadn't gotten them out of the frying pan yet. So he did the only thing he could think of to get Rodney off his back. He was a complete asshole.

"Look Rodney I think we've talked enough for now. That's what got us into trouble in the first place," John snapped. "Excuse me if I'm reluctant to get into another heart to heart right now." John hated himself the moment the words tumbled from his mouth. He didn't mean any of it - hell he wasn't even upset with Rodney.

That shut his friend up faster than the threat of imminent death ever could. John saw all the progress they had made in mending their strained friendship dissolve in seconds through the pain and hurt in Rodney's eyes. Good job, get him to open up and when he does throw it in his face. You're such a jerk John.

John told himself it didn't matter if Rodney was angry with him. It would make it easier to make sure he kept him safe this time. An angry McKay was a more quiet and more obedient McKay. It was all crap, but it's what he kept telling himself. He would just apologize and fix it later, there was always later. The most important thing was protecting Rodney.

The sound of branches snapping under someone's foot drew his attention away from his friends intense, sad stare.

John readied his weapon and whispered, "We'll talk later."

"No we won't," was the curt reply as Rodney tested his probably still semi-weak and tingling legs.

John swallowed back his emotions. "Can you walk?"

The scientist stood somewhat steadily to full height and glowered down at him. "If you're worried about me slowing you down, or screwing up again, don't I'll be just fine. I don't need your help."

John heard all the things his friend had and hadn't said. Shit. He thinks I blame him. The words "I blame me, not you. I'm angry at myself for failing you." were on the tip of his tongue, but their hunter was getting closer.

He bit back any reply and inched closer to the thin wall of vines shielding them from their attackers view. He was roughly two feet away from the exit when the shadow of their foe passed in front of him. The man hadn't even paused, the footsteps continued in the opposite direction fading with every step until John could no longer hear them.

He released a breath he hadn't even been aware he was holding. John turned and motioned his team mate up alongside him.

Rodney looked pale, but seemed to be walking alright. His friend was holding his stomach with his free hand rather protectively though.

"You sure you're okay," John whispered.

If looks could kill. John shook his head slightly but refrained from taking the bait. "Let's head out."

Well John. He thought while creeping out of the cave. John held open the door of vines until Rodney cleared the exit. You may still get Rodney safely off this planet, but you may have already lost him. John swallowed the bile lacing his tight throat. Rodney wouldn't meet his gaze as he instructed him to say close and follow his lead. He expected his friend to make some smart ass remark about his plan, but Rodney said nothing. I just told him were going to take an indirect route to the gate and he's got nothing to say about it?

"Do you understand McKay?"

"Whatever you say Colonel," Rodney's voice was tense and angry.

Yep, it was going to be a long walk back to the gate.

end chapter five

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