Chapter 29: Conceptions of Reality
It was Ginny's Birthday. Harry couldn't believe it- his wife was turning sixteen. For a few short months, they would be the same age. They had been married for five months now and the novelty of hearing Ginny addressed as "Mrs. Potter" still hadn't worn off. Harry didn't think it ever would. He never wanted it to.
He and Ginny had plans tonight, very special plans. As Harry walked to Dumbledore's office to pick up their prearranged portkey, he smiled to himself and blushed. He couldn't believe what they were going to do tonight. Closing the portrait of the Fat Lady softly behind him, Harry recalled the conversation he had had with Ginny a few weeks earlier when he had asked her what she wanted to do for her birthday.
"Gin, your birthday's coming up."
"I know, Harry…"
"So, what do you want to do- just the two of us. I mean, it's important- we can make a tradition as to how we want to spend our birthdays together every year."
Ginny grinned, which turned rapidly into a blush.
"Well, Harry, I… I want to…"
Her breath caught in her throat, and she seemed unable to voice her desires.
"Yeah, Gin? Look- whatever you want, okay? Gold doesn't matter! We'll do it- it's your sixteenth birthday, you're my wife and I love you. I want it to be special- not like my birthdays used to be."
Ginny blushed, if it were possible, even harder.
"I want to—useprofessorsnapespotion—" she said in a rush.
"What was that?"
"I said I want to—um… oh, Harry! You know what I said!"
Now it was Harry's turn to blush.
"I know… I just wanted to be sure. You don't have to, Ginny, you know that right?"
Ginny leaned into him, snuggling them deeper into their favorite chair in the deserted Common Room.
"I know I don't, Harry. I know. I WANT to. It's important, even if it had nothing to do with the prophecy. I mean, I love you, and I talked to Hermione about it—"
"You WHAT!"
"Not like that!" Ginny cried, laughing in reassurance. "I talked to her about… well, babies and stuff. And I mean I MARRIED you, Harry, insufferable git that you may be, but I love you and I married you. And that means that I want to have insufferable little git babies, too."
Harry grinned lopsidedly. "Ginny—you mean it? You—you really want to have little Harries and Ginnies running around with awful tempers, untamable hair and an unrivaled attraction for trouble and dark magic?"
Ginny laughed, and leaned in to kiss Harry's forehead- ever so gently- on his scar. Harry smiled. It had taken him months to being used to having someone touch him there, but Ginny insisted. Every night before bed, she would kiss him on the lips and then softly kiss his scar. When he asked her why, she simply shrugged and replied 'Because. I love you. And when I say I love you, then I mean I love ALL of you- even the parts you don't like'. It was one of the reasons that Harry loved her more and more each day.
"Yes, Harry. And I will only consent to having your children if you promise that they'll have the Potter hair and not the Weasley."
"Hey! My mum was a redhead!"
"I know. But you're not- and I want a little Harry."
Harry grinned. "All right. But does he have to wear glasses?"
Harry thanked Professor Dumbledore for the Portkey and left the office. Ginny was waiting for him with their rucksacks outside the portrait hole. With a touch of their hands, they were off to Grimmauld Place to spend the night for Ginny's birthday.
"You've got the potion then?" asked Harry nervously, more for lack of anything else to say once they were settled in for the night.
Ginny nodded, flushing a lovely pink as she giggled. "Yup. Professor Snape expressed his disdain at the thought of the—what was it he said? Oh yes—the "monstrous abomination" we were bound to create together."
Harry grinned. "I love my monstrous abomination of a wife. Here, I almost forgot- I got you another gift."
Ginny smiled, and held out her hand expectantly. "The wand holder was exquisite, Harry, and I love it, you really didn't need to—well, I won't say you shouldn't have. Because you should. Although Merlin only knows how much trouble this baby will put me through once we decide to have it. I'm going to need a lot of gifts to make up for it."
It was an unspoken agreement between Harry and Ginny- they weren't going to talk about the potion and how it would only take effect if the worst were to happen. They just spoke of the baby as if they were going to wait to have it until it was most convenient. Harry and Ginny both seemed to know that should this war end in the way they wanted it to, the first thing they were going to do was have a baby together. It just seemed the right thing in their hearts to do.
Ginny tore into her gift, and grinned when she saw it. Collaboration from her husband, her best friend and her brother lay before her eyes, and she knew it was absolutely perfect. Hermione had knitted a little matching baby onesie, booties and hat. Ron had used some of his compensatory galleons from the Ministry to purchase a tiny toy broomstick, along with a miniscule Chudley Cannons baby outfit. Now that he had money, it seemed that he had taken Harry's outlook on it- 'spend it on those you love, that's all its good for.'
"Ooh," Ginny cringed. "We had better hope this baby gets your hair genes, or the poor thing is going to look just as horrid as Ron in these Cannons jumpers."
Harry laughed, and leaned forward as Ginny unwrapped the final part of the gift- a mobile, stuffed with all the other goodies in what was actually a bassinet, not the present's packaging. She carefully set the tiny magical Quidditch mobile (complete with seven players, broomsticks, and magically flying quaffle, bludgers and snitch) back in the bassinet and kissed her husband soundly.
"This baby's going to be the luckiest in the world- I can tell already."
Harry grinned, stood, and reached his hands out to her. Pulling her swiftly from her seat, he lifted her into the air and carried her to the bedroom they had first shared the night together- Eternal Sunset. Lying her down on the bed, Harry carefully removed her shoes and socks, kissing each of her toes and his heart warmed at her giggles. He softly kicked of his own boots and crawled into bed next to her. Snuggling in beside her, he lay his head on her chest and listened to her heart beating.
"It seems different this time, doesn't it?" Ginny asked softly.
"Yes, love, it does. It makes it even more special."
Ginny smiled and nodded her agreement. Harry leaned up to kiss her, but she put a finger to his lips, silently telling him to 'hold that thought' as she leaned to the bedside table and reached for the potion that had been painstakingly brewed by the most brilliant potions master Hogwarts had ever seen. Fertility potions had long been around in the wizarding world, and delayed conception potions had been discovered only more recently (in the last 500 years or so).
Ginny smiled softly as she uncorked the flask. "Bottoms up," she grinned, and downed it all in one gulp.
Harry could only stare, mesmerized at what this girl—no, this woman—this amazing, wonderful woman, was doing- and doing for him. Not even just for him, but for their world. He watched as she carefully re-corked the bottle and lay back on the pillows, smiling to herself. Harry eyed her nervously, and she answered without his having to ask.
"Not bad, actually. Tasted almost like lemonade."
Harry eyed her skeptically- he had been in the hospital too many times to not know better. Most potions tasted like a mixture of rotten cabbage and mold.
"Oh, all right. Lemonade mixed with ammonia and bat guano, but still- lemony."
"Does it hurt?" Harry asked, concernedly, ready to splinch himself in attempted apparition if Snape were to have done anything to hurt his wife- or his baby.
Ginny smiled and shook her head. "Not at all. It feels sort of tingly, and warm. Spreading right to my toes, but concentrating—" she moved Harry's hand to her abdomen "—right here. It makes me… smile, actually."
Harry grinned. It must be all right then. Carefully, as if Ginny were the most fragile thing in the universe (and she was about to be, as far as he was concerned) he kissed her cheek. He traced his fingers down her throat, past her collarbone, down her breastbone to her bellybutton and his lips followed suit. With each kiss he unbuttoned her shirt further down, kissing every part of accessible flesh. Her blouse was soon discarded, and Harry slowly unbuttoned and unzipped her skirt, sliding it carefully past her hips to her thighs, kissing every inch of skin it revealed. Down it went, until her was once again kissing her toes, only this time she let out a sigh instead of a giggle.
It wasn't long before she had turned the tables, and Harry was at her mercy. Touching, teasing, kissing, caressing, —it was torture, and he was loving every minute of it. After what seemed like a pleasurable eternity, Harry was once again in control. He leaned on his elbows—he always felt like he would crush her with his weight—and kissed her softly as they brought themselves together in a way that only they could. Here was bliss. Here was happiness. Here was love. Here was… here was GINNY. Harry looked into her eyes, and it was as if he could see into her soul. The world was in his lover's eyes- everything that meant anything to him was there, swimming in lipid pools of chocolate brown. Each thought was a breath, each breath was a kiss, and each kiss was a touch, bringing them closer together, closer to fine.
Ginny…
Ginny had given up so much for him by offering to do this. Harry took a laborious breath as he pressed forward, staring into her eyes as he kissed her lips. She was willing to raise another savior, should he be unable to fulfill his duty. She was willing to give up her own idea of life to make sure that evil would perish.
Harry…
Harry looked into her eyes, and felt himself pushing deeper than he had ever felt himself go before, all the while feeling her rise up to meet him. And Ginny, his wife, was gazing at him with the utmost trust, adoration and LOVE in her eyes.
And Harry knew.
Ginny was the first person to ever love him. Granted, Harry knew people loved him- he had the rest of the Weasleys, Ron and Hermione, but Ginny was different. She was the first to ever love him unconditionally. All his faults, all his trials, all his expectations, the weight of the prophecy and the wizarding world that rested on his shoulders- she accepted them all.
Harry knew he loved her. He loved her more than anything else in the entire world—magic, his friends, even his own life. He was going to be a father, and in doing so he was going to make her a mother. His head was swimming- he had never felt so euphoric in his life. His body glistened with sweat and it mingled with Ginny's, who was panting with pleasure beneath him. He was nearing the edge and oh, how he wanted to just jump right off and FLY.
The final moment was upon him, he didn't think he could hold out much longer and he knew she was right along the edge with him. Harry looked into her eyes and realization dawned on him. He would die for this girl. And he would do it willingly. He would do anything, and everything, in his power if only he could keep her and their child safe. Understanding crashed into his brain as his body hit the final tidal wave. He and Ginny crashed into shore together, panting in rhythm, their bodies fused like they had never felt before. And Harry understood like he never had before.
In a way, Hermione had been right. Through an ultimate act of love, Harry unlocked his power. He knew what love was. And when he realized it, he understood that he had known all along.
True love was to willingly die for someone else. Like how he would willingly die to save Ginny if he needed to. How he would gladly throw himself in front of her if it meant she would live and so would their baby.
To give your life for someone else. The ultimate sacrifice. THAT was love. And Harry knew what he had to do- there could be no greater love. A night spent together to conceive their first child had brought the Boy-Who-Lived more understanding and determination than he had ever known in his entire life. Harry now held the key to open the door so he could fulfill his destiny. And he had his wife to thank for it.