MY NEW BRAIN

By Rachelle Williams

A/N: Snoring

Summary: Read on...

Disclaimer: Crying I DON'T OWN A THING! STOP TORTURING ME! (lol)

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ANGEL AND CORDELIA'S, everyone but Spike and Faith are there

CORDELIA: "So, thanks for coming by you guys. We thought you'd like to bounce a few ideas off for the wedding ceremony"

Buffy starts to cry.

RILEY: "What's the matter?"

BUFFY: "Yeah, yeah, it's just, y'know.."

ANGEL: "Cordy said 'wedding'"

CORDELIA: "So, anyway, we thought one of you could read something during the ceremony"

BUFFY: "Oh! I'd LOVE to read a poem!"

ANGEL: "Do you think you could get through a poem?"

BUFFY (crying): "A really short one"

CORDELIA (To Buffy): "I think Riley should read the poem, sweetie"

BUFFY (almost crying hysterically): "Thank you!"

RILEY: "Okay, I can do that TOO"

Angel and Cordelia look at each other than at Riley, a confused look on their faces.

ANGEL: "'Too'?"

RILEY: "Yeah, I got something else planned for you guys"

CORDELIA: "Do you mind telling us what it is?"

RILEY: "No, I think I'll just put this on the Q-tip (winks in a friskly manner)"

ANGEL: "Well, whatever it is, I hope it involves winking" (winks mockingly in that same friskly manner)

Spike enters, looking excited.

SPIKE: "Hey-hey!"

ALL: Hey. Hi.

SPIKE: "So, I just talked to one of the DOOL writers today and..."

CORDELIA: "Uh? What is DOOL?"

SPIKE: "Days Of Our Lives"

ALL: "Oh!"

SPIKE: "So, anyway, you are NOT gonna believe this, but my character's coming out of his coma!"

ALL: Oh! Congratulations. Yay.

ANGEL (sarcastically): "And, unbelievable, considering your character was 'supposed' to be in a coma forever"

SPIKE (glares, back to): "And-And-And! Not only that! I'm gettin' a new brain!"

ANGEL: "So, great things are happening at work, AND your personal life!"

Cordelia smacks Angel, who puts his around her, smiling mockingly at Spike.

BUFFY: "Wait, getting a new brain?"

SPIKE: "Oh well, they're killing off one of the characters on the show, and when she dies her brain is being transplanted into my body"

RILEY: "Wait, wait, a BRAIN trasplant!"

SPIKE: "Yes, it's a highly controversal procedure"

RILEY: "It's, it's ridiculous"

SPIKE: "Well-well, I think it's ridiculous that you haven't had SEX in three months!"

Everyone looks at Riley. Angel's smirking.

RILEY: "It's winter. There are fewer people on the street"

Buffy and Cordelia smile and nod. Angel does a mock smile. Riley glares.

CORDELIA: "Uh, who are they killing off?"

SPIKE: "Uh, Jessica Lockhart, Cecillia Monroe"

BUFFY AND CORDELIA: "NO!"

CORDELIA: "She's my favorite character on DOOL"

SPIKE: "Nice"

BUFFY: "She is SO good at throwing drinks at people's faces. I mean, I swear I have NEVER seen her finish a beverage!"

CORDELIA: "And the way she slaps people! God! Won't you just love to do it, just once--" (Her hand motions a backhand slap, directly over Angel's face)

ANGEL: "DON'T DO IT!"

Cordelia lowers her hand, putting it on Angel's shoulder and smiling knowingly at him. Angel just nods frantically. (Ahh, such a cute couple! Monderlism and Cangelism is so fitting! Just imagine the scene!)

BUFFY: "Cecillia Monroe, man, what a great actress..."

SPIKE: "Tell me about it! She's been on the show forever! It's gonna be really hard to fill her shoes"

RILEY: "Yeah-yeah, help me out here, when you come out of the (bunny ears air quotes) "brain transplant," you are going to be her?"

SPIKE: "Yeah, but in Drake Romoray's body!" (Riley does an disbelieving laugh) "Why can't you get it! I thought you were a scientist!"

Riley looks at him.

THE END

Crying IM SO SORRY!