A/N: I'm back! I didn't abandon you, I swear. It has been a long, difficult month with personal life stuff, and writing just wasn't a priority. I'm here though, and eager to finish this story. Not sure exactly but I think there will only be maybe five more chapters for this story, then I'll start on Book 3, which I've been mapping out the past couple weeks and feel excited about. I got the feeling from messages that I shouldn't dwell on Lily's draught dependence, so I wrap it up swiftly in this chapter, but next update will be dealing with some of the withdrawal and fallout from all that. Also there's some sweet Scor/Lily moments here at the end. Hope you enjoy! (I hope it's not too sappy...I try to avoid that but sometimes it's just...fun!) Anyway. I would LOVE to see some more reviews for this chapter, let me know you're out there reading and enjoying my story. I've had a rough month and could use a little extra reader love! XOXO

Despite her ability to pull herself from her bed long enough to attend the Gryffindor and Hufflepuff game, and even manage a few kind words for her brother and cousins after their win, Lily found herself eager to return to the peace of her bed.

"Lils, where are you going?" Julianne stopped Lily as she headed towards the dungeon stairs instead of the Great Hall for lunch.

"Oh, I'm just feeling a little tired," Lily said.

"Aren't you hungry?" Julianne asked.

Lily shrugged. "I'll eat at dinner," she said.

Julianne frowned. "You skipped breakfast," she said.

"I know," Lily said. "I'm just not hungry."

"Lily, what is going on?"

"What do you mean?"

"You're acting strange," Julianne said. "You've been acting strange."

Lily stared down at the floor, her eyes tracing a flaw in the stone, ignoring Julianne's accusation.

"I thought we agreed no more secrets," Julianne said. "I thought you said you trusted me."

"I'm not keeping anything from you, Jules," Lily said. "I just haven't been sleeping well, so I feel extra tired lately."

Julianne frowned. "Fine, keep your secrets," she said. She turned and headed to the Great Hall, leaving Lily behind.

Lily debated following her friend. She did feel hungry, and she felt bad for causing a rift between herself and Julianne again, but she could hear the noise from the Great Hall from where she stood. It was raucous and too energetic. Gleeful shouts and hyper laughter made Lily grimace. She didn't want to be around a crowd. She wanted quiet. She wanted calm, and she knew exactly how she would achieve that. With one last glance towards the Great Hall, Lily slipped down the stairs towards the dungeons, eager to reach her room, take the calming draught, and crawl into bed.

Before long, Lily was no longer hiding the effects of the calming draught as well as she had been. Her missed meals became more regular, her performance in classes continued to drop, her social life had become nearly nonexistent, and even though she did attend classes, and practices, her mood was always quiet and withdrawn, and occasionally short tempered.

"I'm worried about you," Scorpius finally confronted Lily after Wednesday afternoon practice as they carried the crate of balls together back to the locker room. It had been nearly two weeks since he had first discovered her secret calming draught stash.

"What for?" She said. "I'm fine."

"No you're not," he said. "You're a bloody mess."

"Excuse me?"

"You didn't even catch the snitch tonight," he said.

Lily frowned, and suddenly realized she couldn't remember how the snitch got back into the crate.

"I caught it," he said. "Don't worry, I told Payne you did."

"You caught it?" She asked, still trying to solve the gaps in her memory of the afternoon's practice.

"Can't you even remember?"

She let out a quick breath and tried to shrug it off. "I just had a bad night. We're all allowed off practices every now and again, right?"

"A bad night? Lily, come on!" Scorpius sighed in frustration. "You're falling apart."

Lily dropped her side of the crate, causing Scorpius to momentarily stumble as he adjusted to the increased weight for himself. "I don't much care for your opinion," she said. "You're not being nice."

"I'm not trying to be nice," he said. "I'm trying to be honest. I'm trying to be your friend, which from what I've been seeing the past couple weeks, you don't have a lot of right now."

She scowled.

"Do you even realize how hurt Julianne has been? I see her at breakfasts and dinners without you. She looks miserable. And even your cousins are upset with you. I've heard Rose and Albus discussing it in classes. You're not being a very good friend or sister."

"I haven't been in a very social mood lately," she said.

"I've noticed," he said.

"Scorpius, what do you want from me? Am I not allowed be tired? Or have alone time?"

"If that was all that this was, sure," he said.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Tell me the truth, Lily."

"What are you talking about?"

"You're using that calming draught stuff," he said, "and it's messing with you in a bad way."

Lily opened her mouth to argue, but snapped it shut without a word. She didn't know what to say. She didn't know how to defend herself or explain herself.

"You don't know what you're talking about," she said finally, narrowing her eyes. "You don't understand."

"Then explain it to me," he said. "And be honest. How often are you taking the draught?"

"It's none of your business," she snapped.

"Please," he tried one more time, his silvery eyes pleading.

She shook her head firmly, then turned and stormed up to the castle, leaving him alone on the field.

Scorpius watched her go, feeling sad, disappointed, and concerned. Then he decided to do something about it, even though he knew she'd be upset at him for interfering; it was for her own good.

…

Lily made her way to Willoughby's office for her lessons a few minutes late that evening. She had been napping after her argument with Scorpius. She hadn't wanted to attend her lessons, but she knew that he would inquire if she was absent, and she didn't want to have to try and explain it.

When she arrived, Willoughby had already prepped the tea, her cup was sitting on the desk in front of her chair. He was waiting quietly with his hands folded in his lap.

"Hi," she said, a little more briskly perhaps than was necessary, but something about his posture put her on edge.

"Miss Potter," he indicated the chair. "Please have a seat."

She sat and waited quietly, feeling more apprehensive by the moment.

He took a sip of his tea and set the mug down slowly, then cleared his throat and spoke. "Mr. Malfoy came to see me just now."

"What? Scorpius? Why?" She spat out her questions quickly, her stomach tightening. She had a feeling she knew exactly why Scorpius had been to see Professor Willoughby.

He lifted one dark eyebrow.

She took a breath, trying to calm down the nerves that had started to take over.

"He's concerned about you," he said when he realized she wasn't going to speak again. "As am I."

"What for? I'm fine," she said.

He stared at her silently for a moment and she squirmed under the scrutiny.

"I've been a little over tired lately," she said finally, feeling that he was waiting for her to speak. "I had a bad practice, and he was upset. That's all."

"Miss Potter, you are one of my best students," he said. "Over the past couple years I have been continually impressed with how well you have adjusted to hardships and managed stress in your life. Perhaps I acted too quickly when I suggested you use the calming draught to help you sleep. It may have been more helpful to allow you to sort out your self without magical aid."

Lily shook her head. "The calming draught has been very helpful."

"I think it had has done more harm than good."

Lily frowned.

"How much do you have left?" He asked.

Lily hesitated. She couldn't tell him the truth, that she had depleted the bottles he had given her after only one week and then last week during their lessons, she had snuck into the cupboard where he stored the extras and taken three new vials, two of which she had already finished.

"Lily, when I gave it to you I suggested one or two drops in tea before bed to help you sleep. That's all. Have you been taking more than that? Have you been taking it at other times of the day?"

She tried to sound casual when she answered. "Only once in a while."

He forehead creased. "I warned you that there could be serious side effects to using too much. Calming Draught—most draughts—are very addicted if not used with responsibility. I thought I could trust you to be responsible."

She felt angry and wanted to argue against what he was saying. She was responsible. It was something she always prided herself on in her family. She wanted to explain that to him, but at the same time she knew that she had no ground to stand on. She had been taking the draught multiple times a day for two weeks. She had not been responsible, and as much as she hated it, everything Scorpius had said to her was true, and everything Professor Willoughby said was true. At the same time though, she knew she needed the draught and she was not willing to give it up.

"It just makes things a little easier," she said. "It makes all the things in my mind just kind of go away…"

"Is that a good thing?"

"Sometimes it's nice to not have things in my mind."

"Look, Lily, I understand that you have been dealing with some impossibly hard and painful things lately, but shutting them off doesn't make them go away," he said. "You can't just fall asleep and pretend like nothing's wrong."

"I'm not," she said.

"You're skipping meals, you're avoiding friends, you're falling behind in classes…" he shook his head. "You're better than this." He paused then reconsidered his words. "You're stronger than this."

She squeezed her eyes shut for a moment.

"Lily, I'm sorry, but I can't allow you to continue down this path," he said. "I wish I could trust you to stop on your own, but I don't.

"What do you mean?" She asked, the panic growing in her voice.

"If I could trust you to use the draught responsibly like I had originally thought you would, I'd allow you keep it for night time use. However, under the circumstances I believe it is best to remove the temptation completely." He stood and motioned for her to do the same. "Come with me."

"Professor, I'm sorry. I got carried away, but I can use it the right way," she said, her voice anxious and fast as she tried to quickly create an excuse that could possibly allow her to keep the draught. She had a terrible feeling she knew what was coming. "I'll only use it for sleeping, I promise."

"I wish I could trust you, but you have proven that impossible at this time," he said. He walked out of the office and she followed.

"Please, give me a second chance," she said. "I'll do better. I won't take it before classes or practices, or at all during the day…"

He grimaced slightly, clearly disappointed in hearing her admit to taking it so frequently. He kept walking towards the Slytherin rooms, while she kept pace beside him, continually pleading with him to reconsider whatever action he was preparing to take. At the door, he spoke the password and motioned her into the common room. The crowd was sparse considering the late hour, and the few students who were sitting about chatting or doing homework didn't seem concerned by the sudden presence of their Head of House.

"Miss Potter, I really do not want to have to follow you to your room and conduct my own investigation, but at this point I'm not certain I can trust you to bring me your entire collection of the calming draught…" Professor Willoughby said.

Lily winced at the cold tone in his voice. Despite her desperation to hold onto her remaining vials of the draught, she momentarily felt even more despair over the fact that she believed she had lost her professor's faith and good opinion.

"Please lead the way to you room," he said, still using the same formal, cold tone.

Lily ceased her protests and turned to the girls' corridor, walking slowly, but resignedly towards her room. Professor Willoughby followed. At the door to her room she took a deep breath before opening the door. She realized that the room would likely be full of her roommates and the idea that they would see her humiliated in this way in front of her professor temporarily paralyzed her. Her hand hovered above the doorknob. He waited patiently for a moment.

"Miss Potter?" He finally prodded.

She let out a shaky breath and pushed open the door.

Julianne glanced up from where she was perusing a fashion magazine on her bed. Her hazel eyes widened when she saw Lily and Willoughby, but she said nothing, and Lily felt impressed by her friend's self-control. Kenny was sleeping already, but Lily was grateful neither Cassie nor Nicolette seemed present at that moment.

Willoughby waited while Lily entered the room, heading slowly towards her bedside table. She opened the drawer and hesitated. Inside she had two full vials, one half vial, and four empty vials. She knew he was waiting for her, and she knew he'd be trying to interpret her hesitation, so acting as quickly as she could, she snatched up the half vial and one full vial and shut the drawer. She returned to him and held out the vials, keeping her eyes focused on the ground, unable to quite meet his eyes.

He held his hand still, palm up, for a moment after she placed the vials there, as though waiting for something else.

"Miss Potter, are there any more?" He asked after a moment of patient silence.

She shook her head.

He let out a short sigh, pocketed the vials she had handed him then retrieved his wand from his jacket pocket. Holding it up, he glanced at her briefly before clearing his throat. "Accio calming draught."

Lily gasped, but before she could react more every bottle from her drawer soared across the room and into her professor's hand, including the empty vials. He stared at the collection in his hands for a moment without speaking. Then he sighed again and his eyes locked on hers. He nodded towards the hallway and they stepped outside of her bedroom to talk more privately away from the curious eyes and ears of her roommates.

"I am sorry this did not work out for you," he said. "I blame myself for ever thinking it was a good idea to trust a second year with something so powerful. It had seemed to be a helpful solution to your sleeping troubles, but sometimes perhaps magic is not the best way to deal with one's problems."

"I'm sorry Professor Willoughby," Lily finally said, and she realized that even though she was angry at the moment, embarrassed, and disappointed, she truly meant it. "I didn't mean to use it so much, it just became so…" she shrugged. "It helped."

"I know," he said. "It helped in the moment. But it wasn't helping overall. Not really. And the longer you used it the worse it would have become. I know this seems hard right now, and you're probably upset and maybe even a little nervous, but I promise this is in your best interest."

She nodded slightly.

"I'm not angry with you Miss Potter. I'm not even disappointed. I'm angry with myself a bit, and I'm sad for you…"

She found herself unable to look at him again.

"I wish there was another way I could help you right now without using a draught," he said. "You are welcome to come and talk to me at any time, but I think perhaps you might benefit from a friend's counsel at this time. I have a feeling Miss Westerly would be anxious to talk to you if you tried…"

Lily sighed. She knew he was right, but she had been so awful to Julianne over the past week she didn't know if her friend would want to talk to her anymore.

"I'd like to you consider taking the day off classes tomorrow," he said. "With my permission. I'll make excuses to your teachers."

"I don't need to…"

"The withdrawal from something as powerful as a calming draught might surprise you."

She silenced and simply nodded.

"Alright," he said at last. "Try and get some sleep. I will check on you tomorrow."

He turned and strode away with long quick steps. Lily heard the glass vials clinking together in his hand and winced. She didn't know what to do without the draught. She knew she wouldn't be able to sleep without it. She doubted if she'd be able to attend classes without it. It had become a constant comfort over the past couple weeks. It gave her confidence and security throughout the day. Her body trembled slightly and she clasped her hands together to try and calm herself.

Okay…I can do this…she told herself slowly. She hated the panic creeping into her body, but she also hated the way her professor had looked other with such disappointment. She doubted he'd want her to return for their weekly lessons. She was no longer the student he had thought she was. She knew she had let him down. She had let herself down. You're stronger than this. She tried reminding herself, but at the moment she didn't feel strong at all.

She headed into her room, not knowing what else to do, and found Julianne still sitting on her bed. Julianne glanced up at Lily and stared, silently. Lily didn't know what to say. She hadn't exactly been a good friend the past couple weeks, and she knew Julianne was hurt. At the moment, however, she wasn't entirely prepared to discuss anything with Julianne, or anyone. She just wanted to sleep, if that was even a possibility. Turning away from her friend, Lily headed towards the bathroom, hoping a shower would help her calm her mind for bed.

Cassie and Nicolette were in the bathroom when Lily entered. They were at the sinks, washing their faces and chatting about some dishy boy in fifth year. They both silenced when Lily entered. She tried not to look in their direction but she noticed their glares in the mirror reflection. She headed towards the showers, ignoring them as best as she could; she had enough in her head without the added pressure of Cassie and Nicolette's unpleasant personalities. She entered one of the two shower stalls, pulling the deep green curtain closed before undressing. She deposited her clothes on the floor outside the shower and then turned on the water, eager to try and wash away the panic that had begun to creep into her head as she anticipated trying to sleep that night without a calming draught.

As the hot water cascaded over her head and down her body, Lily felt her body begin to tremble. She hated the feeling. It made her feel out of control. She tried taking breaths to stop it, but the shivers were involuntarily and despite the hot water, she couldn't stop it. Her eyes prickled and before she could stop herself she had started to cry. Lily hated crying, and she was usually quite talented at avoiding it, but just like the shivering, she couldn't stop. Once the tears spilled from her eyes they took over. Her body heaved with sobs, though she did her best to keep them quiet so Cassie and Nicolette wouldn't hear if they were still in the bathroom. She leaned against the wall of the shower, allowing herself the release she seemed to need so desperately.

She didn't know how long she was in the shower, but she stayed until the crying stopped and all she was left with was the dull ache in her chest and head to remind her of the onslaught of tears. She turned off the shower and wrapped herself in a towel. The bathroom was empty when she exited, which didn't surprise her. She knew she must have been in the shower for at least a half hour. She brushed her hair slowly, methodically, trying to keep her mind empty. Her eyes were red and swollen, but she knew her roommates were likely already sleeping and wouldn't be able to see the embarrassing evidence of her emotional breakdown. She moved into the closet and dressed quickly in yellow cotton pajamas before returning to her room. As she had anticipated all her roommates' canopies were drawn and the room was quiet and still.

The quiet sent waves of panic through her body and the trembling returned. Lily considered the likelihood of being able to fall asleep if she were to lie down and close her eyes, but she knew it wouldn't happen. Sleep was not a possibility for her tonight, not without the draught she had been using for weeks. She glanced at her bed briefly, then turned and left the room, heading to the common room. If she had to have quiet, she'd rather it be in front of the fireplace where she at least didn't have to listen to her roommates' peaceful sleeping.

Styx noticed she did not approach the bed and swiftly leapt down from the bed to follow her out to the common room. Lily was relieved, though not surprised to see that the common room was completely empty. She took a seat on the couch, stretching out her legs, making herself as comfortable as possible, trying to sooth her trembling body. Styx circled up on top of her belly and kneaded at her with his paws, seeming to sense her unease.

"Get comfy, boy," Lily crooned to her cat. "One of us should be able to sleep tonight at least."

Lily's eyes drifted to the fire, and as she watched the flames flickering steadily, her mind began to wander and her unsteady emotions began to creep in once again. She felt an overwhelming onslaught of emotions all at once: guilt, anger, shame, sadness, relief, frustration, embarrassment…

She hadn't even noticed when she started to cry, but the tears were slipping steadily down her cheeks now.

"Umm, hey…"

Lily's breath caught.

"Lily…" Scorpius stepped around the couch, coming into her view. "Hey, you okay?"

Lily didn't answer.

"I know you're brassed with me," he said slowly. "I know I probably seriously overstepped, but I had to do something. I couldn't just stand by and watch you destroy yourself like that! You were falling apart and I was worried about you…" He let out a sigh, realizing she still didn't seem inclined to talk to him. "Anyway, that's what friends do, right? They help when you're in trouble. And you were in trouble, whether or not you're ready to admit it, you were in trouble. I had to talk to Willoughby…"

"He took it all," she said finally, quietly. Her voice was hoarse with tears, and she had to cough twice to clear her throat.

"He took it?"

"The sleeping draught," she said. "He took everything I had left."

Scorpius shrugged. "I think it's for the best."

She glared at him.

"I'm serious," he said. "I know you don't think so right now, but give it time. When this stuff clears out of your system and you're back to normal, I think you'll see that I was just trying to help."

Her anger was still bubbling in mind, but there was something in the pit of her stomach that tightened when he spoke to her, and she knew that deep down she wasn't mad at him, and somehow she knew that he had done what he did out of concern and friendship.

"I'm not mad at you," she said after a few moments of silence.

"No?" His body visibly relaxed at her statement.

She shook her head and pressed the palms of her hands against her eyes, trying to clear away the tears. "I'm just…angry in general, or maybe just scared…"

"Scared?" Scorpius sat on the couch, lifting her legs to make space for himself and then setting them down on his lap. "What are you scared of?"

Lily shifted her position slightly so she was sitting up a little and able to see him better. "Everything."

He frowned. "Lils, you are one of the bravest girls I've ever known. One of the bravest people actually. Everything you've been through in the past couple years…putting up with Slytherin, your family, dealing with those wankers that attacked you…" he shook his head.

"I'm not brave, Scor," she said. "I'm just really good at pretending." The tears came again and she pressed her hands hard against her eyes trying to stop them. "I'm terrified. I haven't slept a full night since my attack. I can't walk to class by myself without imagining they're going to pop out at me from around every corner…I think about it constantly. I replay every moment of it and think about what else would have happened if you hadn't saved me…" The tears were falling steadily now and she couldn't stop them. "Taking the calming draught these past couple weeks was the only thing that gave me a moment of peace. I was able to sleep without their masked faces haunting me, I could get through a class without wondering if every student I saw could possibly be one of them…I'm not brave, Scorpius. I'm completely broken."

He moved again, edging closer to her on the couch. He reached out and pulled her gently towards himself. Styx abandoned his place on the couch, slinking across the rug to settle down closer to the fireplace. Lily shifted and let Scorpius pull her into his arms.

"You're not broken," he said quietly, slowly, not quite sure how to offer comfort, but knowing he needed to. He fixed his position slightly, sitting back against one arm of the couch and letting her settle between his legs, her back pressed up against his chest, his arms circled around her arms and stomach and his cheek resting against her head. "You've experienced something awful and it's okay to feel…everything you're feeling right now, but I know you're strong and you're going to come out on the other side of this one day, when you're ready. You don't have to be brave or strong right now though. For now, I can be here for you. I can be strong for you." He tightened his arms around her just slightly.

"I'm just so tired of having to smile and pretend like it's all okay," she said.

"Then don't," he said. "You don't owe that to anyone."

"I don't want anyone to know. I don't want anyone to know that there's anything wrong."

"Would it really be so terrible if your family found out? I don't know your family well, but I feel like they care a lot about you. They seem to care a lot about each other. They look out for each other. I think they'd want to know about this."

"Of course they'd want to know. They'd want to take charge and try to fix it. They'd make sure I never walk to class alone again, or anywhere else for that matter," she said. "You have no idea what it was like growing up as the youngest girl in such a large family. I've dealt with their over protection my entire life. Coming to Hogwarts was the first time in my life I felt slightly free, independent. I don't want all that getting messed up just because of this stupid thing."

"Okay, first of all, it's not a stupid thing. It's a serious thing, and I hate that you feel you can't tell anyone about it, but I respect that and I'm just glad that I know and can be here for you."

She felt warm suddenly, and became very aware of his arms wrapped around her. It felt secure. It felt relaxing. She turned her head slightly and leaned back so her cheek was pressed up against his chest.

"Also, I don't know what it was like growing up in a family like that, but to be honest, it sounds nice. I'm sure there were times when it was suffocating, and even though I think your brother James is a bloody twit, I bet there are some great things about having such a large family…" his words drifted off and he hoped he hadn't offended her.

She sighed. "I'm sorry."

"For what?" He had not been expecting that response.

"I sound ungrateful."

"I'm lost," he said.

"I get the feeling that your childhood was a little lonely. And even if it was overwhelming at times, mine was completely full of people and love. I love my family…"

"I know you do," he said. "I love mine too."

"Of course you do," she said. "I didn't mean to imply you didn't…"

He laughed a little. "I know Cassie's challenging, and I definitely didn't have a childhood full of cousins and laughter like you did, but I know I was loved and my parents raised me the best way they knew how."

"You don't have to defend them to me, Scor."

"I sometimes feel like I do," he said.

"What? Why?" She shifted a little, trying to see his face.

"Oh, you know, they're Slytherin through and through…and all that stuff from our parents' past."

"We've talked about this before," Lily said. "The past is the past. And their past has nothing to do with us."

"I know, and I appreciate you for saying that, but it's hard to ignore sometimes…" his arm loosened slightly around her, and she suddenly realized how intensely he felt what he was saying.

"It's not hard for me," she said. She instinctively grabbed his hands and pulled his arms more securely around herself again. "I don't care about any of that."

Scorpius smiled and without thinking, leaned down to kiss the top of her head. He felt her tense briefly, and then relax into him again. She let out a slow breath and squeezed his hand.

"Thank you," she said suddenly. It was quiet, and he almost asked her to repeat herself.

"For what?" He asked.

"For this, for talking to me, for always just being here for me…" she shrugged. "I don't know how to explain it, but I just feel safe with you." She had no way of knowing for certain since she wasn't looking at him, but Lily could almost feel him smiling.

"You'll always be safe with me," he said.

She felt a strange and sudden urge to ask him to stay with her all night, but she knew that was not only ridiculous, it was also selfish and very strange to ask. So instead she disentangled herself from him and sat up, turning herself around on the couch until she was facing him, sitting with her legs crossed beneath her.

"You should go to bed," she said, trying to sound casual and calm.

"Oh…" he said, slowly, sitting up straighter as he spoke. "Okay, yeah. Sorry, you were out here of course to be alone. I didn't mean to interrupt that…"

Lily shook her head. "No, it's not that. I don't mind you being here at all. It's just late and we have classes tomorrow, and you shouldn't feel like you have to stay here with me if you're tired…"

"Are you planning to go to bed any time soon?" He asked.

"No, honestly, not probably at all."

He lifted an eyebrow and stared at her, waiting for more explanation.

"Since Willoughby took my calming draught I don't expect I'll be able to sleep. And even if I could, without the draught…" she took a slow breath and squeezed her eyes shut. "I don't think I'd want to. I'm afraid the nightmares will come back."

Scorpius frowned. "I'm so sorry. I feel terrible."

"What for?"

"For turning you in like that to Willoughby. That was way out of line. I didn't mean for you to lose all the potion. I hadn't thought it through. I was worried about you and the way you've been acting and I thought maybe you weren't being very careful or responsible with it, but I didn't even stop to think about how much you might actually need it."

Lily wasn't sure how to respond.

"You must hate me," he said.

She shook her head.

"Yeah, I got in your business and messed everything up…" he shook his head. "I'd hate me!"

"I don't hate you, Scor."

"Of course you do. You have every right to. It was none of my damn business. I should have left well enough alone…"

"You were just looking out for me," she said. She reached out and took his hands in hers. "I know that. I am grateful for that."

"Are you?" He asked. "Really? You don't hate me just a little bit."

She laughed, and found the sound somewhat surprising coming from her lips. It had been a while since she had been in the mood for laughter. "Maybe just a little…but I'm sure you'll find a way to make it up to me."

His eyebrows lifted, causing a single crease in his forehead. Lily didn't know why but she found herself staring at the slight crease in his usually flawless forehead.

"I'm sure I will," he said finally.

She swallowed, feeling her throat had gone strangely dry.

"Well, yeah…" she swallowed again and then stayed silent.

"How about I start by staying out here with you," he said.

"Out here?" She echoed.

"Yeah. I get the feeling you came out here because you didn't intend to sleep tonight in your room."

She nodded. "I don't plan to sleep and it was hard with all my roommates sleeping."

"Well, you need sleep," he said. He sounded determined but she was frowning. "You could barely fly today at practice and we have another practice in the morning before breakfast, remember?"

"Right, yes, Pace's insane daily practices leading up to the final." She rolled her eyes. "He's going to kill us all."

"Most likely, but regardless, you need sleep."

"I'm fine," she said. "I'll be fine."

He shook his head.

"I don't want to sleep, Scor," she said firmly. "When I close my eyes and dream…all I see is their masked faces. I can feel them on me…" She snapped her eyes shut.

"It'll be different tonight." He said. He squeezed her hands tightly. "I'll be here with you. You'll know you're safe if I'm here with you."

She hesitated. The idea of Scorpius staying with her all night seemed odd, but at the same time, she had to admit it also sounded really nice. She found herself nodding before she realized she had agreed.

"Great," he said, and then he paused, seeming to think about what he had just agreed to for a moment. "So, umm, how's this going to work…" he glanced around the common room then shrugged. "We need more couches in this place."

"Most students prefer the chairs. It's more solitary," she said.

"And yet the two of us always seem to end up here on the couch."

She shrugged, thinking about how true that was.

"Well, the couch it is then. Unless you think the rug would be comfier." He glanced towards the deep green rug in front of the fireplace where Styx was purring peacefully. "It's pretty thick."

Lily watched his face for a moment, his eyes flicking around the common room. She realized he was nervous. She frowned.

"Scor, are you sure you're comfortable with this?"

His eyes flicked back to her instantly. "With what?"

"Staying out here with me," she said. "You don't need to, truly. I don't want you to do anything you're not comfortable with."

"I'm staying, Lily."

She nodded slowly.

"I want you to feel safe."

She nodded again.

"I want to take care of you." This he said more quietly, but he stared at her while he said it.

Lily nodded again, and despite what she had said to Willoughby a couple weeks back about not liking how Scorpius seemed to try and take care of her, she realized that she didn't mind it very much at all.

Scorpius stood suddenly and moved swiftly to a chair across from them, bringing back a silvery throw pillow. He fixed it on the arm of the couch and settled back on again, this time pressing his back up against the back of the couch.

"Come here," he said, motioning to Lily with his arm outstretched.

She hesitated only a moment before moving towards him and stretching her small body out beside his tall frame, her back to his front. Her head rested on his arm, and his nose brushed against the back of her head. When she had settled in, he reached to the back of the couch for the heavy knitted throw blanket that always rested there and spread it out over both of them. He adjusted his position and the blanket slightly before letting his free arm drape across her stomach.

Lily tensed slightly before letting herself relax into his arms. She knew if anyone were to enter the common room and see them, their position would bring up questions of the most personal kind, but in that moment she didn't care. She felt truly safe and relaxed for the first time in weeks.

"I still might not be able to sleep," she told him quietly.

"That's okay," he said. "I'll be here either way."

She let out a contented sigh and slipped her hand into his, pulling his arm closer. "Scor, why are you so good to me?"

"You're my friend," he said. "Isn't that what we decided on after you helped me out on Valentine's? We're friends. We take care of each other."

Lily was smart enough to know that things wouldn't be easy without the draught, even with Scorpius by her side. She knew sleep wouldn't just magically come to her now, and she would still be tortured by memories of that night weeks back. Somehow though, feeling Scorpius' warm breath against her hair, and the slight pressure of his arm over her stomach, she felt like things would be alright.