Chapter 10: Family Ties

George Washington University Hospital ER

Wednesday, 27 October 2018

11:00 am

"Myles, I just want to go home." Elizabeth swung her legs stiffly off the exam table. "The girls—"

"—are with Sam and Tara. They're fine." Myles gave her shoulders a gentle squeeze, keeping her from getting up completely. "And you're not going anywhere until the doctor says it's okay. Relax, love. It's all over."

"No, not for a little while, it's not," she corrected soberly. "I can't just shake something like this off any better than you can. You've just had more practice working around it. It will be good to have a houseful of people for the next few days, though. That will help."

He nodded; then he suddenly pulled her tightly against his chest. "Dear God… Beth, I thought…" He stopped, unable to finish his thought, and buried his face in her dark hair, his lips pressed to her neck.

She wrapped her arms around his waist. "I know," she whispered. "So did I. If it weren't for the team, Sam… we have a lot to be grateful for."

"We do."

They held each other for several minutes, offering silent and whispered prayers. Then she pulled back and smiled up at him. "You know, if you keep calling me that in front of your teammates, somebody's bound to ask for an explanation."

"Just what I was thinking." Brian Rhodes was lounging in the doorway, his hair still disheveled from his wrestle with Kyle, a triumphantly roguish grin lighting his face. "I've never heard you call her anything but 'Elizabeth,' mate. Where'd 'Beth' come from?"

Blond brows shot up. "Your hair may be lighter, but just then I could have sworn Bobby Manning was back from the grave."

"I'll take that as a compliment of the highest caliber." The younger agent pushed off the doorsill and flopped into the chair nearby. "And you aren't going to misdirect me. So spill."

"A true gentleman does not tell tales." Myles assumed his best pretentious expression.

Brian snorted. "Uh-huh."

Elizabeth watched a slow flush creep into her husband's cheeks, and decided to rescue him. "That particular nickname popped up on our honeymoon, Brian, and it's a very private one between us. I think the magnitude of what we faced brought it out, but that's as much information as you're getting."

The look she fixed on him had him laughing as he raised his hands in surrender. "Yes, ma'am," he chuckled. "Still…"

"Brian." Myles' voice was softly firm. "Enough."

Either the tone or the quiet request in the blue-grey eyes made the younger man swallow whatever he'd been planning to say next. "Ok. Hey, this is almost my last chance to get inside your head, Leland. Can't blame a guy for trying." He smiled at Elizabeth. "I don't wonder it took a psychologist to capture his heart all those years ago."

The old teasing subject made Myles laugh softly. "Neither do I," he said, stroking his wife's cheek. Then he looked back at Brian. "So is there some particular reason you're here, or did D rescind your promotion for staging a raid in your argyles?"

Elizabeth giggled. "And very classy argyles they are, too."

"Ok, I'll drop the inquisition if you leave my socks out of it." He sat up and folded his hands across his knees, his dark eyes fixed solemnly on Myles. "I'm sorry we cut it so close," he started.

The Harvard grad shook his head. "I'd rather it be close than too late. Don't apologize, Brian." He tilted a grin at his wife. "I was told once it's bad for our image."

"Besides." Now Earl joined them. "Think of all the fun you're going to have grilling the 'onerous little twit.' Not that we're going to need much in the way of confession. He hasn't stopped talking since we put him in the car."

Myles rolled his eyes. "Kyle Singleton hasn't stopped running his mouth since the day I met him, I'm sure. But I don't have to listen to him any longer, and that's perfectly fine with me." He gripped his wife's hand. "He can't touch us anymore."

Earl tapped the psychologist on the shoulder. "You okay, Liz?"

She nodded, turning to look at him over her shoulder. "Just as soon as they let me out of here. And I expect you both to join us tonight."

Myles sighed. "Sweetheart, does the word 'rest' mean anything to you? You were shot less than an hour ago."

"I promise, I won't do anything," she smiled. "I'll just lay on the couch and let you all help yourselves. I simply think we need a good dose of love and laughter in our home tonight, and we can't have that without the Bureau's party animals."

"What about Kendra?" Brian's expression clouded a little.

Elizabeth shrugged. "She's part of the team."

"Not for long." The future unit leader's jaw set. "Not if I have a say in the matter."

"That's your decision," the psychologist replied. "But she's welcome to come, if she feels like it. You might inform her that not only will Rachel be there, but my Deaf sister and Jack's Deaf wife as well. Then she can make her own choice."

:
Leland Residence

Wednesday night, 6 p.m.

"You said you were going to rest." His voice was stern. "Go back to that sofa and stay there."

"Myles, I slept all afternoon, thanks to the painkiller you made me take. I'm fine, just a little stiff." Elizabeth winced as she shifted her position against the counter.

"Busted." He called across the rather crowded room, since his hands were full of shredded cheese. "Brad, Jamie, come get my stubborn wife and return her to her seat, please."

His older brothers appeared from the living room and promptly formed a two-man carry. James Leland chuckled as Elizabeth raised a brow at them. "It's this or over my shoulder, Sis," he challenged. Take your pick."

The psychologist laughed at him. "All right, all right. I give up. But I'm walking back to the sofa."

"Oh, of course." James let go of his brother's hands, but waited only until she was past him before scooping her up in his arms with a gleeful shout. "Way, hey, folks, make way for Lady Liz!"

The house was filled with sound and color; not only had most of the team come over with their families, but the Lelands were there as well, all four siblings and their families. James' four boys were scattered across the country, and Brad's son David was in Toronto on business, but everyone else was here, along with Connie Dillingham Collins, her husband Nathan and their sons Logan and Joseph. The two boys were currently in a cutthroat game of Clue with Zachary Hudson.

Sarah was talking with 19-year-old Molly, who was a freshman at Princeton majoring in Criminology; there were hopes that another Leland would be joining the ranks of the Bureau in a few years. The two had been inseparable since Molly had arrived, the older girl taking Sarah under her care and letting her talk while she processed everything.

The girls had never been directly involved, but they were scared all the same, especially when they got home and found their mother had been shot in the leg. Though Myles and Elizabeth had done their best to reassure them, Sarah and Rachel had undoubtedly picked up on the aftermath. They were handling it in character, Sarah losing herself in any kind of physical activity to keep the feelings at bay, and Rachel not letting her father out of her sight for long.

Even now, while the other kids were playing in the living room, Rachel was perched on a stool at the kitchen counter, absently poking at the pizza dough she was supposed to be pressing into the pan. Her eyes would dart up to him every few minutes. She was very quiet.

Myles tapped the counter in front of her. YOU O-KQQ he signed.

She shrugged, struggling to contain the tears brimming in her eyes.

RACHEL, he said, bringing the "r" shape closer to his heart than usual, a way of showing her his feelings. MORNING PAST MOMMY DADDY BOTH SCARED. IF YOU SCARED ALSO, THAT O-K

She nodded. ME KNOW, she answered, but her eyes were still down a little.

"Brian? Could you take over for me, please?" Myles wiped the excess cheese off his hands with a dishtowel. "Just layer the sauce, cheese and toppings twice on each pizza. Then pop them in the oven for about 15 minutes. It's already heated up." He held out his hand to Rachel. YOU-ME TALKQQ he asked.

O-K. She took his hand and hopped off the stool.

He led her away from the crowd, toward the study, but stopped when she pulled back at the door. He knelt and put his arm around her, then reached up with his other hand and switched on the light. SEEQQ NO ONE THERE. ONLY YOU-ME. ROOM QUIET YOU-ME TALK.

Her eyes were wide, and a tear escaped onto her cheek, but she nodded. O-K.

Someone on the ERT team had done him a huge favor, Myles had already noticed when he got back from the hospital with Elizabeth. The only evidence that anything unusual had gone on in the room was a scrape on his file drawer where he'd yanked the cuffs across it, and a small hole in the very corner of one wall, out of most sightlines. There was no sign of the blood stain from Elizabeth's wound. Probably Melanie, he thought. The ERT supervisor was close friends with both him and his wife, and knew that the girls would have been terrified.

He sat down on the sofa and Rachel climbed into his lap immediately, clinging to him as she'd done earlier in the day while Elizabeth was asleep. He held her tightly, stroking her hair, while she released the tears. When she finally looked up at him again, he signed ASK QUESTION ABOUT TODAY YOU WANTQQ

She started to shake her head, but he continued quickly. QUESTION O-K. TALK O-K.

Rachel looked at him, apparently trying to search his soul, and he nodded gently again. Finally, she signed O-K and moved to sit facing him on the sofa, her legs tucked under her Indian-style. "Talking won't make you more scared?" she asked.

He smiled; that was the longest sentence she'd actually spoken all afternoon. RACHEL NO, he replied. SCARY THINGS WE TALK ABOUT MAKE NOT SCARY. YOU UNDERSTAND?

"I think so." She tilted her head sideways in a gesture so like her mother it caught his heart. "Why did that man want to hurt you? Hurt Mommy and Uncle Brad and everyone?"

Myles sighed. SOMETIMES PEOPLE GET ANGRY WHEN CHOICES THEY MAKE GET THEM IN TROUBLE. BUT THEY THINK, IF THEY HURT PERSON WHO CATCH THEM, MAKE BETTER THEM FEEL BETTER WILL.

"But why did he shoot Mommy? She didn't do anything to him. That's not right."

NO, he replied. K-Y-L-E, HIM HURT MOMMY AND UNCLE B-R-A-D AND EVERYONE HIM THINK HE HURT ME MORE. HE WAS RIGHT.

Her eyes went very wide. "Will he come back and hurt us?"

NO, RACHEL. K-Y-L-E IN JAIL NOW. HIM IN BIG TROUBLE NOW. MOMMY O-K, B-U-L-L-E-T CUT ONLY HER SKIN. HIM NEVER HURT US AGAIN.

"When I get scared I have bad dreams about stuff," she said. "Will you have bad dreams about Kyle?"

MAYBE, he replied. C-A-S-E-S I WORK ON, IN PAST I HAD MANY BAD DREAMS. BRAIN TAKE TIME MUCH THINK THINGS THROUGH WHEN SOMETHING SCARE YOU.

She climbed back into his lap and touched his cheek. "You can come hug me when you have a bad dream, Daddy. You do that for me lots of times."

Myles laughed and hugged her tightly. "I just might do that," he murmured against her hair. Then he pulled back so she could see him. LITTLE WORK ME HAVE, YOU HELP? he asked. SCRAPE WE FIX, AND FIX WALL, MAKE LIKE NOT HAPPEN.

"Sure," she nodded, her eyes a little brighter now. "But how did the drawer get scraped?"

He paused. SURE YOU KNOW WANT? he asked.

She nodded again. "Yes. I'm okay. Will you feel better if you talk, too?"

IF MAKE YOU AFRAID AGAIN, NO.

Rachel fixed a blue-grey gaze on him. "Everybody's safe, Mommy only got a cut, and I want you to feel better."

The simplicity of her statement warmed him all over again. BABY GIRL MY RACHEL MY FRIEND ALSO he signed, struggling to meet her eyes since his own were moist. He knelt by the side of the desk and motioned her beside him. K-Y-L-E TELL DADDY SIT HERE. HIM TIE MY HANDS WITH MY HANDCUFFS ON DRAWER HANDLE. DADDY GET OUT I WORK HARD, SCRAPE DESK FINISH.

"Oh." She didn't ask anything more, though she glanced at the corner where the bullet had entered the wall. "I'm glad we were with Uncle Sam and Aunt Tara."

ME ALSO, PRINCESS. He hugged her once more. "So am I."

"Are you two ok?" Elizabeth signed it as she spoke. She was leaning on a pair of crutches as she stood in the doorway to the study. Myles watched her green eyes cloud slightly as she took in the room for the first time since this morning.

He looked at Rachel. "Are we?" he asked.

The eight-year-old nodded. "Yeah," she replied. "We're ok. Daddy just told me how that man Kyle tied him to the desk."

"You did what?" Elizabeth's brows drew together. "Myles—"

He held up a hand. "I told her only what she asked about," he clarified, signing as he spoke. "She's afraid, too, sweetheart. Understanding as much as she wants to will help us all heal."

Rachel walked over and looked up at her mother. "Are you still scared, Mommy? Is that why you're mad at Daddy?"

"A little scared, yes," Elizabeth admitted, more gently now. "But I'm not really mad at Daddy. I just don't want you to be scared."

Rachel thought this over. "I was scared today when Uncle Sam showed up at my school early. And when he told us that you were hurt. But it's better now with everyone here. It makes it seem like a long time ago."

"It is better." Elizabeth managed to get seated on the sofa, leaning the crutches on the arm next to her. "We may all still have a few nightmares, though. You can come find us if you need to."

"I know," Rachel responded. "And I told Daddy he could come hug me if he had a bad dream. You can, too." Then she looked up at her father, her head tilted slightly. "We're not canceling the party, are we?"

Myles laughed genuinely. "Not a chance, princess. I think we need as many parties as we can get right now."

"Which reminds me," Elizabeth added, "the whole reason I came looking for you. Brian says the pizza is ready, and if you don't hurry up, he's going to finish off the pepperoni one without you."

"No!" Rachel giggled, and raced out to the kitchen.

Myles held out a hand to help his wife up. "I see you unearthed the crutches from the back of the closet. I wondered how long it would take."

"Brad and Sam adjusted them for me," she replied as she reached for them and slipped them under her arms.

"Well, crutches or not, as soon as dinner is finished, you are bidding 'good night' to your guests and going to bed." He slipped his fingers into her hair and kissed her gently. "Or I am going to sic Tara on you."

The psychologist laughed. "After all I've heard about sparring sessions over the years, I'll go quietly, love." She leaned into the warmth of his hand. "It's good to have our home back."

"Elizabeth!"

She turned to find him standing in the bedroom doorway, his hands on his hips and an exasperated expression on his face.

"You were supposed to be asleep. The doctor is going to hang me out to dry when I have to drag you back to the ER for exhaustion."

Elizabeth smiled warmly. "I couldn't sleep," she said simply. "And I just got looking through my hope chest, and got a little lost is all. I haven't been exerting myself."

Myles sat down on the foot of their bed and regarded her for a moment. She was sitting in front of the open chest, a few items scattered on the floor around her. "What did you get lost in?" he finally asked.

"Happy memories. What else?" She held up a green silk dress. "Do you remember this?"

He smiled. "How could I possibly forget? It's been too long since we tangoed."

"You know what the best part is?" she queried. "The first thing I remember now when I see this is that wonderful evening you created. The rest has faded to just an incidental. And then the second time I wore it, when I had those body jewels on my shoulder…"

"You were utterly breathtaking," he murmured. Then he suddenly moved down to sit next to her. "What else have you kept all these years?"

Her dark brows rose in surprise. "You've never really been into mementos. Why the sudden interest?"

"Like you said," he shrugged, "happy memories. The girls are asleep, Brad, Kim and Molly are sacked out in the living room, everyone else has gone home for the evening. Besides, I'm curious to see what has meant the most to you."

She stretched a little, grimacing as her left leg shifted. She caught his concerned gaze and waved off the comment. "I'm ok. It will be very stiff for a couple of days, I know, but I'm all right. If I don't stretch it at all, it'll take longer to recover."

"Here." He pulled over the footstool that went with the small armchair that still graced their bedside. "This will make it easier for you to reach things." He took a moment to help her get seated without too much movement.

"Thank you, love." She caught his cheek before he sat down again and pressed a lingering kiss on his lips. "You're good for me, you know that?"

He laughed softly; the question brought back memories from when they'd been first dating. "Not half as good as you are for me," he whispered back.

Elizabeth smiled brightly and pushed aside a baby blanket in the chest, then pulled out a red silk rose. "How about this?" she asked.

"I remember that," he replied. "I gave it to Sarah on her first Valentine's day. I'd planned to do that every year until she was twelve, then surprise her with a dozen real ones. How did I forget?"

"I think you gave up on the idea when she tried to eat them," his wife giggled. "You walked in one night to find her surrounded by silk petals, with a stem halfway down her throat."

"Ah, yes. And we could never get them out of her reach. I remember we certainly tried." He noticed something sparkling under a shawl he knew was her grandmother's, and pulled it out. "Oh, love," he breathed. "I will never forget how beautiful you looked in this." He moved to kneel beside her and placed the tiara with its long veil on her head. "Even our wedding photos can't do it justice."

Her cheeks colored even as she smiled. "You know, your mother told me something that day that I've never forgotten. She said that if I wanted to know how you see me, all I had to do was look at my reflection on our wedding day. She said that was the vision you have always had of me."

"She was right." He gently removed the veil, folding it back like she'd had, and laid it on the bed. "What's this?" He held up a small leather-bound book.

"Open it."

He did, and flipped to the spot where she had a ribbon marking the place. "This is Poems of 1850 by Elizabeth Barrett Browning," he said. "Is this your favorite of her poems?"

"It's special to me." She reached to touch his cheek again, and recited very softly, "Unless you can think, when the song is done/No other is soft in the rhythm;/ Unless you can feel, when left by One/That all men else go with him;/ Unless you can know, when unpraised by his breath/ That your beauty itself wants proving;/ Unless you can swear "For life, for death!" -/ Oh, fear to call it loving!"

His eyes widened. "The hospital— you quoted that to me when I chewed you out for being in the room with me…"

"When I though I was going to lose you," she finished, stroking his cheek gently. "The first time. That poem has sustained me through a lot more than Ebola, believe me."

"I still have the Knight's Code framed on my desk," he said quietly. "It became a bit of a theme for us, the whole team, for quite awhile. Bobby in particular liked the idea of slaying dragons."

They spent almost an hour, going through things, reliving moments that had shaped their lives in one form or another. Courtship, marriage, parenthood… all of it bound together with love, respect, humor, and shared emotion.

Finally, Myles lifted one last box from the chest. It was a flat box, plain white, and she'd written in the corner of the lid, All my dreams. He lifted the lid, and drew in a breath, then looked up into her emerald eyes. "You saved them all?" The baritone voice shook a little.

She nodded, her eyes luminous. "Every letter. I wish I had your gift for words, love."

He thumbed down through them idly, love letters he'd written her on anniversaries, other holidays, a few when he was on an extended undercover assignment; then his brows raised as he pulled out a folded sheet of silver wrapping paper, complete with a sheer ribbon and a spray of long-dried white roses. "Your shower gift," he whispered.

"Yes. And the beautiful letter you wrote me for that night." She pulled it out of the envelope; the letter was dog-eared and split along the folds in a few places. Her voice was soft as she read: "'My beloved Elizabeth, As I sit in my study and write this, I see your face before me and long for the hours to hasten their journey until we meet at the altar and vow before God Almighty to cherish each other for all our lives. I have often taken pride in my gift of words, but find now that I struggle to put in prose the feelings that are entwined around my heart and soul. That I love you with all that I am is something I hope you will never have reason to doubt, and that I promise to do my utmost to make you happy is something I hope you will always know by my actions.'"

She handed the letter to him; he took it, his hands shaking a little, and picked up where she had left off. "'I have never loved easily; perhaps I had seen too much in my course of duty to truly believe there were still guileless souls in this world, certainly over the age of ten. Yet, when I drown in the emerald depths of your eyes, I see all that is good and pure in this world, and I yearn ever to protect it still. That gift alone would make me love you, but you are so much more, so much that I have thirsted for without realizing it. You are the completion of my soul, the sole keeper of the key to my heart, and the greatest treasure I could ever hold in my arms.'"

His voice broke slightly as he continued. "'That you have retained until marriage something so precious that so many others give away without thought leaves me in awe; it grieves me that I cannot meet your gift with an equal one. Yet I know you would tell me to not dwell on the past, so I offer this in its stead: my truest fidelity from this point forward. My heart, my body, my soul are yours alone, and have been since the day I met you.

"'My dearest, we have faced so much already, and still we stand together; the future glows brightly before us, for if we have braved this much and triumphed, the trials of every day seem pale and small in their shadows. To you I vow this evening, and all the days of our lives, to fight each fight, grand or small, with the same fervor and dedication to the cause of peace and our love that you have shown me.

"'Dream of me tonight as you sleep wrapped in the purity of my love for you; I know I will dream of you and all that awaits us, beginning tomorrow. Ever your love, Myles.'"

Tears were shining on her cheeks, and she let her fingers drift into the gold of his hair. "You are all my dreams, Myles Leland," she whispered, "and always will be."

He took her hand, pressing a kiss into her palm. "I love you, Elizabeth. More than I ever could have imagined all those years ago."

It took a few minutes to put everything back into the chest, and then for him to help her get ready for bed, but soon she was snuggled against him, the warmth of her skin mingled with his own. Myles leaned his cheek against her hair. "It's not been an easy road," he murmured in her ear, "But I can honestly say I have loved every day of our lives."

"So have I," she replied. "Because we've lived them together."