Chapter Four - Respite (Regent?)
"Now," Lord Maahes says as he turns toward me, "it's past time for you and I to settle things!"
Startled, frightened even, I stare into angry lion eyes. Suddenly, the expression in them softens.
"Have you forgotten your own name?" Lord Maahes asks me softly.
I shake my head. "No, I... It's 'Mahaad'. And my true name..." I pause. True names hold magic even deeper than the Dark Magic I'd just recently learned. The magic of my true name is even greater than that of all the Millennium Items put together. Dare I give that control over me to a god? Even one as seemingly helpful as Lord Maahes? He spoke for me when no one else would at my judgement. It seems right to share even that deeply personal, newly discovered secret with him.
"My true name is..." His hand covers my mouth, preventing me from uttering it. He smiles at me.
"I am greatly pleased that you would share that with me, Mahaad, but no." Lord Maahes' eyes smile at me. "There is no need to utter it. Since I am your patron, your ren was my birth-gift to you. It is I who gave you your true name in the first place. No, I speak of the name your parents gave you, your birth name. I believe you may have forgotten it."
My birth name? I had lived at home with my parents and sister for only a few years before I was sent to the palace to grow up in the court of pharaoh in the hopes that I would become one of the prince's loyal, noble subjects. I was fortunate that prince, Atem, chose me to become one of his friends, as well. The name I have borne my entire adult life had actually been given to me, by him.
It had been so long since I last used my birth name that I had all but forgotten it.
"'Mahesenseteped'," I finally state. "That is the name I was given by my parents."
"I can see how the young prince derived 'Mahaad' from that," Maahes notes. "But say it again, slowly if you must."
"Mahesenseteped, Mahes-en-setep-ed," I obey, sounding out each word that makes up my name. This is so familiar to me! When had I done this before? My head drops in shame as my memory makes the meaning become clear to me.
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"Comport yourself with decorum at all times," my father had instructed before sending me on my way to the palace for the first time. "The prince will look like a little boy, but do nothing to upset him. He is the falcon in the nest, the crown prince, and will one day be the pharaoh. If he is pleased with you at your meeting today, you will have a chance to become part of his court."
I kept this thought uppermost in my mind as I was brought into the prince's chamber.
"He's so small!" I thought when I first laid eyes on the prince. "Three years younger than me. Yet, not weak. His eyes are so lively, even though he seems so composed. I bet he's very smart. I wonder if he will think I'm smart, too?" Somehow, it had become very important to me that the prince like me.
"I am Mahesenseteped, son of Setepenmaahes," I stated my name, my father's name and my lineage proudly. My family has always served the throne with loyalty and devotion. I wanted to impress the prince, I wanted the prince to like me. I desperately wanted the prince to like me. Not because of my father's instructions, well, not entirely; but because of the grand spirit I could sense within him, even then, even though he was still a small child.
Those huge, serious, warm, brown eyes blinked. I found myself entranced by the motion and the soft light that suddenly sparkled in the prince's eyes.
"Mahaad."
It was the first word he had uttered in my presence. I was startled, only for a moment, by how deep, yet child-light the prince's voice sounded. So complete was my surprise that it took me a full moment to realize that's what the prince thought my name was.
"Oh, I don't want to disappoint or upset the little one, but..." I thought.
"It is a hard name to pronounce." I tried to be gentle. "We could try it more slowly...?" The prince nodded solemnly.
"Mahes," the name of the deity my family held a special devotion to.
"Mahes," the prince echoed me easily.
"En," the next syllable of my name.
"En," that intriguing voice echoed me again.
"Setep," the word in my name meaning 'chosen'.
His warm brown eyes captured my attention as he repeated the word.
"Ed," I finished. I wished there were a few more words in my name, so that I could have a few more moments of the prince's time. I worried that he would find he didn't care for my company after this little lesson in how to say my name.
"Ed." That light, yet oddly deep voice finished.
"Mahesenseteped." I said my full name properly.
The soft light crept back into the prince's eyes, along with the most serious and solemn attitude.
"Mahaad."
I knelt on the floor respectfully before the prince. I remember looking for a long moment into the prince's huge and quietly sparkling eyes.
"You could say my name perfectly well, if you wanted to, couldn't you?" I asked him in a whisper. The prince's lips twitched, trying their hardest to contain his smile. The tiniest, merest nod did manage to escape. My heart jumped in delight. Could it be the prince felt that same call of the heart that I did? Did he, too, think perhaps it was our destiny to march into our futures side-by-side with each other?
"But, you want to call me something easier, don't you?" I continued quietly. Again, that suppressed smile and shadow of a nod.
"Very well. Please allow me to introduce myself again, my prince. My name is Mahaad," I agreed in my normal speaking voice, resigning myself whole-heartedly to accepting the new name and whatever fate the prince wanted to share with me.
Suddenly, the prince's arms were thrown about me. I had to fight to keep my balance against an exuberant, impulsive hug; resolving to go down under my prince to cushion the fall if indeed fall we did. Instead, holding the prince in a careful embrace of my own, my balance somehow supported us both. For some reason, though our actions were highly irregular, the prince's guards didn't take alarm. Indeed, I believe they regarded both of us with kindly gazes.
"Mahesenseteped, I like you very much! I hope you will stay and become my friend!" a gentle whisper wished in my ear.
"Why, that little...! He could say my name perfectly well! But, I truly don't mind. If he is to be my prince, I suppose I am..." My thoughts and emotions calmed as my mind came into willing agreement with the decision of my heart."I am your loyal servant, my prince," I agreed, whispering my vow. The arms around my neck tightened before the prince stepped back.
"I am Siatum-meryamun-re, son of Akunumkanon, but I'd be pleased if you'd call me Atem."
"Of course, my prince." I hoped my eyes held the same repressed, yet playful, sparkle that had danced in his eyes. Those brown eyes held no sparkle as they narrowed at me in displeasure. "What can my prince's humble, loyal servant do to please you, Atem?" I finished, giving my prince the satisfaction of "winning" this verbal sparring match. His laugh rang out. I resolved then and there to make that my life's goal; to do whatever it took to make that joy dwell within the heart of my prince forevermore.
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But, as I place the treasured memory of my first meeting with my prince, no, my pharaoh, Atem, gently back into its place of honor in my mind, and focus my attention on the lion-headed god before me now, shame fills my being. I cannot maintain my gaze with the god and my head drops.
"My Lord Maahes..." How do I apologize for this insult? "I am deeply sorry!"
A hand under my chin lifts my gaze again. The lion-headed god is smiling at me. "For what?"
"I -- I should have realized... I should have served you better..." My horror at my own actions knows no bounds.
"You always served me well in your actions, if not by name -- as you have served Anubis. Tell me what your name means."
I cannot help it. He might be regarding me with gentle eyes and an understanding face, but I am still horrified at my unintended insult, the insult that I had unknowingly committed my entire adult life.
"'Chosen Hand of Maahes'. That's what my name means," I finally whisper. "My family has always held you in high regard. The men in my family are always named for you. I had -- forgotten that. I am deeply sorry, my lord."
Again, my chest above my heart is honored to receive the light touch of a god. "Your heart always knew, even if you didn't know that you knew. You always performed my will. I am content."
I regret, so deeply, not honoring such a noble god while I lived.
"Belie that regret with how you serve me now, if you must," Maahes narrows his golden lion eyes at me. "Or do you not trust my forgiveness? But, come, let me show you around."
We are in the astral plane. It is Lord Maahes' responsibility to guard the comings and goings through the plane. He tells me that the Fields of Blessed lie beyond the Halls of Ma'ati. Pathways leading to the stars stretch out in all directions, the akhu appear as shining lights as they use those pathways to visit places I cannot even begin to imagine.
He brings me to regard a massive door.
"This leads to the Shadow Realm. Currently, that Realm is at war. The Shadow monsters are under attack by Zork, even as you battled his minion on earth. They wait, doing all they can until the arrival of their King."
"Their King? Who leads them now?"
"The King has a regent who commands in his stead, for now. You will recognize him, I am certain."
Akunumkanon, Atem's father and the pharaoh before him, steps through the door. I fall to my knees in the attitude of respect for my pharaoh without thinking about it. My head falls as I recall the desecration visited upon his final resting place and even more heinously, his body, by the tomb robber, Bakura. I feel shame that I failed to protect his tomb.
He laughs gently and raises me to stand again. "There's no need to bow before me, when you walk alongside a god!" Startled, I look into Maahes' face, just now realizing the insult I'd offered him, yet again. He smiles and shakes his head as I prepare to throw myself face down in full obeisance before him.
"I know the respect and devotion you hold in your heart. There's no need to show it to me. In fact, I will be most displeased if you make open show of it!" Maahes punctuates his command with a low growl. He stares for a long moment at me, to make sure I heed his warning, I suppose, then turns to face Akunumkanon.
"How goes the war?" he asks simply.
"Not good. We lost another battle and some more ground. I fear we will lose the Shadow Realm completely to Zork. I shudder to think what will happen to Egypt should I lose... And my son, battling against him on the other side, will face forces with power unimaginable if I do!" Akunumkanon despairs.
The battle Atem fights in life is mirrored here in the Shadow Realm? Even though Diabond was strong, how did one tomb robber come by so much power as to wage war in the Shadow Realm?
"I think the time for your act of redemption draws near," Maahes' voice carries a comforting tone in it.
Akunumkanon's face lights up as he looks up into the god's eyes. "Re-really? I can finally give over this task of holding the Shadow Realm to someone else and enter the Fields of the Blessed?"
I turn to look at Lord Maahes myself. I had never heard of one being forbidden to enter the Blessed Fields -- unless one's heart failed the judgement and was devoured by Ammit.
"You will have the chance to complete the one task your heart most desires. With that desire finally satisfied, you will be able to enter the Blessed Fields and stand proudly before Lord Osiris as one of his justified subjects," Lord Maahes explains. "Mahaad, or, depending upon what he decides, someone else, will take your place holding the Shadow Realm for the King."
As this pronouncement echoes, Akunumkanon turns to look searchingly at me. "Is he -- trapped -- as I was?"
"'Trapped'?" Lord Maahes repeats. "No. You were never 'trapped', except by the wishes of your own heart. Mahaad's situation is a bit different, as he willingly fractured his being to become as you see him now."
"He, he is..." Akunumkanon stammers.
"He is a challenge to the gods of judgement," Maahes supplies. "Judged, justified, worthy; yet his heart is also unfulfilled, as yours was. Further, he is incomplete. Deserving of a place in the Fields of the Blessed, but not suitable to enter them. Accepting the responsibility of holding the Shadow Realm for the King is one of Mahaad's possible fates, once you have completed your heart's final task. Your regency of the Shadow Realm nears its end."
The Shadow Realm? Waging war in the Shadow Realm is not what I want to do. It's not why I accepted the uncertainty of this fate! I want...
"I -- see," Akunumkanon gazes at me with a ruefully compassionate expression. "I fear you stand to inherit a difficult task from me. Currently, we hold only about one-fifth of the Shadow Realm for the King. Zork befouls the rest."
"Akunumkanon, such discussions may occur later. For now, your duty as regent is still in place. The gods have reached their decision about Mahaad, so I will escort him back. He needs to understand the full scope of it -- before making any sort of final decision."
"Mahaad?" Akunumkanon asks softly. "If I may ask -- what is the unfulfilled duty of your heart?"
"I wish to serve my Pharaoh Atem forevermore," I state simply.
Akunumkanon steps forward and places a hand on my cheek. Tears shine in his eyes. "Poor child. You've always made things hard on yourself. My son could never have a more loyal friend than you. Am I a selfish father for hoping that you are able to fulfill your heart's wishes? For I do, even though you may never enjoy the Blessed Fields because of it. Still, I think staying forever at my son's side is a sort of acceptable afterlife for you..."
Even though I don't understand all that he's talking about, I know that Akunumkanon would never wish ill for me. And, he is right. If my choice is to remain at Atem's side forever, or enter the Fields of the Blessed and never see him again, it's a very easy decision to make.
"My soul is Atem's faithful servant, forever," I tell Akunumkanon.
"May your heart's wishes lead you to happiness," he replies. The door opens behind him. Tendrils of black and purple reach out and beckon.
"I must go. I will do the best I can in this battle, to make things easier for my son in his battle." Akunumkanon squares his shoulders and enters. The door closes behind him.
Maahes stares after him. It's becoming easier for me to read the god's expression on his leonine face. I can tell he feels a regretful sort of compassion. "It is too bad that Akunumkanon's reign did not fall when the Two Lands were in a period of peace. He has always done the best he can, both in life and in his regency of the Shadow Realm, but his skills are not suited for war-time. His reign would have been one of astonishing cultural growth, marked by compassion and justice, had it only been during a time of peace." Maahes shakes off the sadness of his words with a quick toss of his head, and reaches out to take my hand.
"It is time to find out what the gods of judgement have decided about you."
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Author's notes -
Next chapter teaser -- Chapter Five – Retainer
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