A/N: This is the band parody to end all band parodies.
xThis Is Drive Shaftx
(Flight from Vassa, Finland to Massachusetts, USA)
Charlie is standing in front of a curtain and pacing. Murdoc walks over to him.
"How is he?" she asks.
"He still hasn't woken up," Charlie whispers, biting his nails. "That doctor bloke is still examining him."
He glances at the curtain nervously.
"Uh, how are the others?" he asks.
"They're watching Space Balls."
"Oh."
Murdoc sighs and kicks the floor.
"Listen, Charlie, I get the feeling that this is all my fault-"
"Well, why shouldn't you? It is, after all."
"What?"
"He doesn't act like this normally, you know," Charlie hisses. "He gets real cocky around cameras, and you just had to-"
"I'm filming a documentary, what do you expect?"
"Hey, you know even though we're supposed to be quiet during shooting, I think your tone toward us is a little bit rude," says the cameraman.
"No…. Kenny, right? I wasn't talking about you," Charlie says calmly to the cameraman. He then glares at Murdoc. "I was talking about your half wit director here."
Murdoc literally jumps on Charlie, sending them both crashing to the floor. The camera is still focused on the curtain, but the sounds of the two scuffling on the floor can be heard. The doctor pulls open the curtain, looks around, then looks down.
"What are you doing?" he asks.
Murdoc and Charlie slowly get to their feet. Charlie's hair is a mess, and Murdoc's jacket sleeve is ripped.
"We were just…" Murdoc begins, and suddenly slaps Charlie across the face. Charlie literally snaps at Murdoc, and his teeth make contact with her face.
Murdoc swears loudly, massaging her cheek. "Did you just bite my face?"
"I'm sorry," Charlie blushes. "I do that sometimes."
"What the hell is wrong with you?"
"I… I get carried away sometimes with people."
"So you bite their face?"
"I'm so sorry," Charlie says, reaching for her face, but she backs away quickly.
"Good Gandalf! Bloody…"
"Okay, that's enough, I barely touched you."
"Shut up, you don't know the pain I'm going through…"
"Oh, be serious…"
The doctor clears his throat loudly.
"Mr. Pace? Could you come in here for a minute?"
Charlie goes through the curtains, does a double take, and grabs Murdoc's arm and drags her inside with him. Inside, Liam is sprawled out on the couch, still unconscious. The doctor turns around.
"Now, I need you to tell me exactly how this happened," the doctor says.
"We told you already…"
"Yeah, your friends' story wasn't exactly clear," the doctor says. "Something about falling down the stairs and hitting the ceiling."
Murdoc and Charlie glance at each other.
"It was a really wild party," Murdoc says.
"Okay," the doctor sighs, rubbing his temples. "At first I thought something hit your brother in the head, but then I saw he had a few scrapes on his face, so my conclusion is that Liam was hit with something, and then he turned around while falling and fell on some pavement?"
"Yeah, that's what happened," Charlie says.
"Charlie, you do realize that the odds of that are one in a billion?"
"Trust me; the odds of what really happened are one in a trillion."
The doctor looks at Charlie with a look of skepticism. He sighs and takes out a pad.
"Okay, I'm going to ask you a few questions about Liam," he explains. "Just answer to the best of your ability."
"Um, alright."
"Do you know if Liam has ever done any drugs?"
"Yes."
"Ever gotten a sexually transmitted disease?"
"I don't know," Charlie says, embarrassed.
"Well, what do you assume?"
"Let's assume away," Murdoc says.
"Okay. Does Liam have any health problems I should be aware of?"
"No."
"Is he going to be alright, Doc?" Murdoc asks.
"I don't really know," the doctor says. "He seems to be in pretty bad shape. I doubt he'll end up being the same ever again."
"What?" Charlie exclaims, seriously scared now.
"I've seen people become slightly narcoleptic after head injuries like that."
"He's going to see into the future?" Charlie exclaimed.
There was a moment of awkward silence.
"…No," the doctor says.
"Narcoleptic is when you fall asleep at random times, Charlie," Murdoc says.
"Oh…Is that bad?"
(Plymouth, Massachusetts)
The band and Murdoc's crew are at a Starbuck's. Liam is slowly drinking a cup of coffee. He is wearing sunglasses and has a band-aid on his forehead.
"Since our Boston gig was canceled we have got three days to relax and explore," Charlie says, putting an arm over his brother. Liam's head slumps onto Charlie's shoulder.
"Did Dr. Shephard say how long he'd be like this?" he asks Murdoc.
"I think he said it was permanent."
Charlie looks at Liam sadly.
"But I think he mentioned it happening more during the first couple of days… Or was it every day after that…."
Liam wakes up abruptly.
"Walk this way!" he sings.
"Right," Murdoc says. "We've got three days to find a temporary back up lead singer."
A/N: This chapter was… the next step after the previous chapter but a step behind the next. …Then again, that's what a chapter is. Next step: Drive Shaft discovers a Drive Shaft cover band called Lane Shift.