To
serve my master
by Etherealstar
Author's notes: Okay this is my last chapter of To Serve My Master, and it feels sad ending it. I just wanted to thank all the reviewers who reviewed anyone of the chapters, regardless if your review was kind or rants, thank you. I appreciate it a lot and this chapter goes out to everyone. I'm a good fan of happy endings so that's exactly what I have for you with a twist of course. So again thank you to all the persons who've read and reviewed and emailed. Also there isn't going to any sequel. No sequel. Sorry. May you all be blessed. Angels and God be with you. Thank you.
Disclaimer: Avatar and Avatar Manga is owned by Nickelodeon and Sitcom. All rights reserved.
Chapter 15: To love what isn't called love.
'I've been letting this life get the better of me way too long' thinks Zuko looking on at Katara who was brushing her hair on the chair in front of him.
'I wonder if she knows I'm awake, watching her and her every move?'
Here I lie in silence, looking back at her reverently. Her long brown hair falls to the small of her back as she repeats the process of brushing her hair in repetition. I can see that her eyes are closed as she delicately handles the brush in her hair. Her brown straight hair glistens in the early rays of the morning. The rays filter through the curtains falling on her face. My! She's a sight to behold every time. I let my eyes linger on her, her youthful face though young radiated more than that, it gave off love and care something few her age ever gave off.
I remember the first time I saw her. Che, it was hate at first sight! No doubt about it. Maybe it was due to the fact she was a friend of the Avatar that I disliked her. But now all that has changed. Changed all because of a simple wager – where she would be my slave and live under my rules. Live the life of a maid and serve the enemy.
Feh, but as time went by, she became every bit of an insult and fiery wit to me. I couldn't actually say she was the easiest of girls I've been around. When she has something on her mind she expresses it. But bit by bit as my anger and hate grew for her, her innocence began interfering with me. Breaking me down into a susceptible and vulnerable man.
I could never forget the times we had.
Mental flashback: Katara caught by the Fire Nation. Serving her first meal and was asked it was poison. First fight when she calls him a dog. The times she allow the sunlight to wake him up. The time she massaged his feet. The first time she fed him tofu pieces with her mouth. The time he caught her in his bathroom when he was about to bathe. The time he sent arrows through the apples on her head. The time he threw her on the bed. The time she threw him on his bed. The time he kissed her.)
Zoning back to reality, Zuko caught her just in time as she braided her hair. The specific way she allowed her hands to go over and under made him focus on her. His eyes stared at her. Imagine just a simple thing like braiding his eyes became mesmerized by. She tied the bottom with a piece of cloth. She was about to turn when he quickly shut his eyes.
Katara could sense something. Turning around she was brought the sight of a sleeping Zuko. 'I could have sworn a minute ago he was waking. Hmm, must be my imagination' she shook her head. Returning the brush to the table she went over to Zuko's side. Sitting on the bed, she eventually lied next to him.
"So this is what it feels to lie next to royalty? Hmm, interesting" unknown to her, her words were very much being listened to by the awoken prince.
Slowly bringing her hand to his face she touched the smooth contour of his cheek. Absolutely everything she could imagine in a lover was present in Zuko. Brushing her thumb against his brow, she thought of the man who wore a scalded mark like that. In a way there was no other way to be if your own flesh did that to you. Could you truly be a good person if the one you loved burnt you both physically and mentally, on your face and heart?
She saw him narrow his brows. She guessed after so many years the burnt flesh was still sensitive.
"Shh koishii (sweetheart)" she whispered
His brows eased and became at peace once again. Katara wondered would Zuko truly find peace with her? She guess there was only one way to truly find out and that was to wait and see. The future held so many surprises, which did more scaring us that assuring us its okay.
"So Zuko, do you snore?" she asked the pretense sleeping man.
"Master Zuko why ever do you snore so much?" she giggled.
'Huh? Are you crack Katara?'
"Why my snobbish little prince what can I do for you?" she asked
"What's that you say, give you a bowl of soup? How about nothing from this maid" she teased.
"Master Zuko" she whispered..
Zuko smirked inside. 'So the onna still thinks I'm a bad man'
"Master Zuko," she learnt into his ear and whispered.
Feeling the shiver, Zuko tried to control his involuntary muscles but to no avail it worked.
Shuddering under her mere whisper, Katara smirked at the sight of her prince.
"You like that, don't you" she purred lowly in his ear.
Zuko wanted so badly to flinch but G-d he was trying to hold back.
"Is my little prince at," she paused to kiss his ear, "unease?"
She giggled.
After a couple moments, she pulled back with a smirked on her face, "oh master, what can I your maid do for you?" she asked.
She smiled. Zuko opened his eyes. "Hello slave" the returned the old name.
"Z-Zuko" she sounded awfully shock.
"Surprise, surprise" he hinted his brows.
"Heh! You're awake" she swallowed.
"Indeed" he paused, "I couldn't help but overhear, your cruel gestures you give at your master." He spoke.
"Erh-um, it-it's n-nothing?" she stuttered.
"Is that so? Well, I beg to differ" he retorted.
Katara blushed. 'This is so embarrassing?'
Zuko smirked liking the flush shame on her face.
"I'm hungry" came his voice.
She blinked back, "your food is downstairs"
"Get it" was his command
"Excuse me?"
"You heard me, go, get, my, food. Now" he affirmed
"Hahah! Very funny Zuko" she giggled
"I'm dead serious onna" he didn't let a trickle of kindness seep.
"Zuko come on, stop playing around" she said.
"Look onna, I'm not in the mood. See this face, its says quit playing, get working." He scowled
"Z-Zuko w-why are you acting like that?" she wasn't sure what was going on?
Was this a joke for getting her back? Because if it was she didn't like it.
"Ah? And how do I act, hmm? How do I act?" his voice darkened as his eyes slightly narrowed.
"Why are you acting this way?" she worriedly looked on.
"And how is that my little, slave?" he smirked. The same devilish and sinuous smirk.
She shook with fear at the old word. The way he announced her was so dark and like old times.
"Z-Zuko if this is a joke, its not a very good one" her voice crumbled into a petite muttering.
"Is that what you think it is?" he scowled. "Feh, what an onna, humph!"
"Stop it" she whispered.
"What was that onna?" he drew in nearer on her, "because I really can't hear a darn you're saying"
"Stop it" she repeated, her voice becoming frantic.
"Huh, what's that?" he came closer, his eyes glistening with seeing her just as old times.
"Stop itt!" she went up a notch.
"Eh?"
"I said" she gritted her teeth, and before she could go any further, he shut her off with a kiss.
Pushing her back into the bed, Katara fell weak under his kiss. The burning, taunting kiss, sent shivers down her spine making her quiver in his hold. He slowly pulled back seeing her give a goofy smile that she was in cloud nine.
"You like that hmm?" he asked.
She dumbly shook her head. "Uh-hmm" was her faint answer.
"Good, now here's what you can do for me" he began, whispering the rest in her air.
Katara listened to the prince as he spoke very lowly in her ear. Finishing up his last request, her eyes popped open at his wicked audaciousness.
"Ohh no!"
"Oh come on onna"
"You don't onna me mister" she pointed off.
"I mean what's so wrong Katara?"
"First off Zuko, I don't mind kissing you, just not in front of my brother. I mean what do you against my brother?" she asked.
"Hey, I'm not the air-head who started the brawl last night"
"Uh-huh, I'll take mental note on that one"
"Come on Katara, just for a little taste of revenge?" he paused, "think of all the times he's driven you up a wall, couldn't you just get him back for it?" Zuko reckoned.
"Urh, no. Because though Sokka is older than me, its like I'm the elderly. I'm more of the logical, maternal one and well he's, well, he's just Sokka. And besides Zuko, my brother doesn't exactly think you're the best prince charming for me. Mainly because he looks at you – differently. Just not friendly." She tried to say it nicely.
"Hey its not my fault the two of you are stuck to the Avatar and became enemies on my list of life." He informed.
"So they're enemies to you now?" she placed a hand on her hip and gave him an expectant face.
He sighed, he waved off at her, "look, what happened in the past stays in the past. Couldn't we just see today as a different day?" he asked. Finally he was being the logical one.
Katara softened. 'Oh I really am good. I have you exactly where I want you. At my knees.'
She smiled, "sure Zuko"
"So you'll get back at your brother?"
"No"
"Please?"
"No"
"Oh come on"
"Zuko the answer is no"
He fumed. Katara just had to laugh at his cute immaturity. Wow, that was a sight for sore-eyes.
Zuko got ready in his customary attire, knowing he would have to settle some unfinished business. Something left undone and raw all due to the way how time had been.
Walking down the hall, his hands grew clammy and his heart increased just a bit. 'Why am I doing this? Do I really have to say sorry, I mean I didn't do them anything.' He sighed. There was no easy way to examine this or solve it for that matter.
Placing a hand on the door, he turned in a clockwise manner. Pushing and entering in, Zuko saw both the Avatar and Sokka.
"Konnichiwa (Hello)" he spoke.
"Ohayo-san (Good morning)" the Avatar spoke
Zuko took a deep breath. "I know you two have been wondering what is going to happen now. Especially you Avatar. I guess, we'll just have to wait and see, hmm?"
"Why did you come here?" Sokka snapped breaking any form of existing salutation.
"To apologize" was his simple and plain answer.
"Is that what you really came to do?" Sokka barked.
"Indeed. Why else would I bother to show my face?" he paused, "why don't you see that I am here to settle what has always been at unease?" Zuko asked.
"I don't trust you pal. Not for the world I do. And knowing that a punk like you has a hold of my little sister. Damn, it just infuriates me all the more!" Sokka sputtered.
"Why can't you see I'm not the enemy anymore?" Zuko folded his arms leaning against the door.
"For a long time Zuko you've chased us. It's a bit nerve-racking that you never gave up. You were our enemy for so many years" Sokka paused, "what do you expect me to do? Do you think its that simple finding that your enemy isn't your enemy but hey, he's now your friend?" Sokka shook his head, "no, that doesn't just go away life poof. That feeling of having someone double cross is always present especially if you're one step closer to what you want to achieve. Aang. You wanted Aang more than anything as a g-ddamn trophy and now you say you don't want that?" Sokka sighed.
"Hmm. I know I've been the enemy because my goal was to obtain the Avatar, but now…it isn't so anymore. Couldn't you just see it like that?" Zuko knew it wouldn't work.
"Look bud, we took years to hate you. And damn we'll take years to be your friend. Something like the enemy becoming the friend doesn't take a moment to agree upon. It takes time, however long, it just takes time" Sokka informed.
"But I feel for your sister. What would you have me do? Gravel at your feet? Look Sokka-boy, if that's what you want then its not going to happen. I'm not a person to drop my dignity for others. I try with people and damn if you don't like it, it isn't my fault." Zuko paused. "I'm not your enemy Sokka or Avatar, I guess I have no more aggressive business to settle. All there is room for, is bit of forgiveness and opening up your foresights"
"Again Zuko, you're not following my point. You just simply can not become somebody's friend if damn you are the enemy" Sokka explained.
"Well then if that's how you feel, don't let me harass you if I'm trying to do the right thing" Zuko leaned off the wall. Turning to head out the room, he was intervened by Aang.
"Zuko" called the voice.
He stopped.
"Hai (yes)?"
"Can I ask you something?" Aang asked.
Zuko turned, "go ahead"
"How did you fall for your enemy, Katara?"
Zuko thought. He mentally contemplated how he did. At first, thinking about it, he saw her innocence in verse of his anger. This became something a bit exciting to intrigue but it wouldn't be the answer to the question.
"I don't know. Perhaps its fate, I guess" he thought.
"Then damn fate huh?" Said Aang in a neutral voice.
Zuko gave no answer.
"You're a sick man Zuko, a really sick man" Aang started.
"Thank you, its much appreciated." Zuko remarked.
"I'm not finished. Thing is, you're also a good guy. I guess pretty confused more than anything. You're like a lot of people whose suffering only because you're perplexed" Aang looked up, "I'll be your friend Zuko, I'll be that" he said.
"Why?" Zuko arched a brow.
"Certainly not for you, but because of Katara. Right now all I can be to her, is a friend. Somebody she could rely on and tell secrets and just be happy with. I learned last night Zuko, that there are different types of love, she may love you in a way I would absolutely fight everything for, but I can't have it, but hey she still loves me nonetheless. But now it comes down to this, that if you hurt her, at any point in her life that's the point you become the enemy and run for it because there will be no second chance or a thing call friend again. Decide wisely Zuko because you only have just one shot at this. I'm warning you Zuko, she means a lot to Sokka and me, just seeing you alone with her gives us the Hibbie-Jibbies, but if Katara thinks this is the right choice she made, then so be it." Aang emphasized.
"Hmm. To start with you couldn't be my friend if you're out on a constant man-hunt for me. In fact that's a bit exasperating. Knowing that my every move is on a look out and that any confrontation I may have with Katara for whatever reason will be dubbed as a classic fault against me. Interestingly enough, I can't seem to say anything but good luck at it. I like your sister for who she is. Feh, your sister is a power-house when she's ready, and a confrontation is almost inevitable to hinder, but that doesn't give you the autonomy or the upper hand to pull her away from me. Understand gentlemen that I may quarrel or even make your sister cry, but I will never, and you quote me on it, I will never harm your sister physically. She gave me something so precious that by hurting her I can just—lose it like that. So now that we understand each other and where we're coming from, I guess Avatar you should brush up on that statement" Zuko informed.
"You think you're so bad. Damn you Zuko." Sokka ripped.
"I don't understand you, and feh, I don't know why I try with people like you. Hate me for something worth hating. Did I hit your sister, did I physically do you something? No. I don't so. If you keep talking like that I can see there will certainly be no friendship between us. Not that I care." Zuko hissed.
"Oh and what about Katara? What is she going to think when she finds out you hate me?" Sokka asked.
"Back up bud, I never said I hated you but damn I never said I liked you either. Technically I never said anything. And just to ring a bell, I'm not the one who's got a flicked up attitude. You're the one who's being all cranky about becoming friends. I don't think I have to answer to Katara. I'm willing to subdue and drop a bit of my humility to tell your sorry butt that I'm sorry for whatever happened in the past, but gosh, is it even being heeded? That part remains to be answered." Zuko convicted.
"Why don't you go to hell?" Sokka snarled.
"I already am. Anything else you want to ask or should I say, rant about?" Sarcastically he asked.
Sokka remained silent, "my sister may not know this but I'd do just about anything for her. She thinks I'm immature and illogical." He paused.
"Can't actually say I blame her for it" Zuko scratched the back of his head in thought.
"Humph!" "Thing is I'm not like that. If she really wants something then I'll allow her to have it. For Katara I'll become just a bit of a friend and nothing more to you"
"Hey that's all I ask." Zuko spoke. "With that taken care of, enjoy your stay gentlemen." Zuko exited the room.
Sokka looked at Zuko, 'this is for you Katara'
Zuko looked at the young girl in the distance, on the beach.
He slightly smirked.
Walking forward, Zuko decided to sneak up on her. Give her a little scare. He smirked at the idea.
Being very silent with his footsteps, Zuko bit his lip and approached her. Going forward to give his mighty scare, a voice interjected, "hello Zuko"
Zuko face-faulted. How could she have known it was him? Assembling himself he took a seat next to her. "I see you sensed me?"
"A fire-bender as yourself will always be detected easily. Especially if he's cute" she giggled.
Zuko gave a small smirk. He drew a bit quiet which made Katara look on in speculation. "Something wrong?" she mused.
"No-not really I guess." He said in a somewhat tired evident voice.
"Is that so hm?" she paused to think.
"It's nothing" came the dry voice.
"You know better than to lie to me Zuko. I know you.." she paused, "downing to a T" she leaned in on his shoulder. "Tell me, what's the matter" she nestled her face in a cozy position on his arm.
He pursed his lips for a moment, "your brother and the Avatar hates me Katara" he started.
Katara sighed. Why did she feel he would tell her this?
"Thing is, I get the feeling that no matter how hard I will try, they'll always look at me as the enemy." He thought.
"I know what you mean. But don't worry koishii (sweetheart), just give everything some time to work. You'll see. I guess the reason everything looks down and grey, is because the problem has now started. But stick with the line koibito (sweetheart) that all will be fine. Right?" she bounced his shoulder playfully seeing him a bit stoic.
"Hai"
"Good, with that addressed, is anything else bothering you?" she nipped his cheek playfully.
"You're feisty aren't you?" he asked.
"Oh yeah!" she giggled.
Zuko turned to her. Katara could feel his inquisitive stare burn. "You're staring" she started.
"I know"
"Why?" she asked turning to him with a rosy pink blush across her face.
"You know I never really realized it Katara.." he whispered.
"What koishii?"
"How different you are"
"Different?" she arched a brow.
"Yeah, I've been in love a couple of times and they all felt the same. But when I'm with you its different. I don't know how to explain it, but everything is different every time I'm with you. It's like this morning, I had no idea you would talk to me in my sleep, but you did. None of the girls I fell for got so firm of a grip with me Katara. I don't know if you're lucky or just cursed. I cant exactly say I'm what you're going to see in most guys, I can try to emulate some of what they give, but I won't fake it for you Katara. I prefer remain true and not somebody else to you." He said in conviction.
Katara looked on. "And why would you do these things Zuko? What exactly do you feel for me?" she asked, "love?"
He frowned. Sighing at the heavy word she used he turned from her.
Katara looked back expectantly but with a bit of panic deep within her. "Zuko?"
There was no answer.
Turning her face she thought about it. 'Is it for real that you truly just like me and not love me? Were you telling me the truth when you said you would promise never to love again?' And in a moment, it all came rushing to her. What she had with Zuko was mere infatuation. It was never as built as love. Love was something more aggressive and stronger. It's a big ole test while infatuation was mere feelings being given out because of what we think we like.
Realizing the horrible truth she swallowed. The thick dry knot not going down.
"I get it now, you don't love me" she whispered, a single tear falling down her face.
"Listen to yourself Katara. Listen well to what you're saying. Love is a very strong word. It can become one of the strongest words we ever use without truly knowing the meaning." He turned to her, "If you're asking me if I love you, then the answer is I don't know. All I do, is that I like you. A lot." He spoke.
"So that's it, I'm just somebody you like? What about the things we did? The things that happened?" she asked.
"What about them?" he asked.
"I-I thought y-you" she began breaking down.
Zuko's heart sank. Swallowing the lump he went forward.
"No..j-just leave me" she cried trying to escape him.
"Katara" he whispered her name softly.
"You never loved me" was her cruel realization.
"Katara, I lived most of my life loving people who I thought loved me. My father, then my sister, then my family, my girlfriend and everyone else. They all said the same thing, that they loved me. But they all lied. They betrayed me and now because I tell you I can't love you, you're tight on my case. Katara, look, I've never been closer to another woman the way I have with you. Damn Katara, I'd do just about everything for you, except…say I love you. The word alone haunts me. And every time I use it, something goes wrong. I'm afraid Katara. So afraid to use love in a sentence for you. Right now the only thing that's worth fighting for is you. If I tell you that I love you, maybe I'll just jinx what we have." He paused, "please understand Katara. That though I can't use one word, it doesn't mean I can't show you what it means." He said.
Katara blinked back, "really? You'd do that for me?" she wiped her tears.
"Why not? You've given me something nobody else has. Sight to see and a life to live." He said.
Katara plastered a small smile. "Zuko" she whispered.
Placing her hands around his waist he held her to him. Placing his chin on her head she listened to the rhythm of his heart. Steady and sincere.
"I adore you Zuko-san" she looked up at him, her eyes fill of glistening tears of joy. "So much it hurts" she leaned forward.
"And I adore you to Katara-san, for everything you're worth to me" he kissed her against the lips.
Holding her in a tight embrace, the two lovers just kept in a trance of their kiss, relishing the moment as a slow red sunset went dying behind them. 'The fortune teller told me I would have someone tall, I guess she's right'
Zuko pulled back. Feeling his lungs burned, he buried his head in the crook of her neck.
Again Zuko found the surrender he found the day before. In sweet revelation Zuko accepted the truth, that all he needed right now was Katara. Treasuring what he had and never had all his life, he leaned in deeper to inhale her scent of fresh wild dandelions. He wish he could be like this forever.
'If you're not the one Katara like damn I don't know where to run next. I don't want to run anymore because I can't take it. Seriously, if love is the word that truly binds me, will I live in fright or willingness? I sincerely hope Katara that somehow, someway you could be the one for me because I don't know, somehow I know you are. At least…at least that's what my heart tells me…'
Smiling, Zuko whispered against her neck, "you very much have pleased me Katara…thank you"
"Anything for you…" she smirked, "my master…"
Dedicated to Legolasestelstar. Thank you for believing in me along with Joel. You have been a great friend to me. This story is dedicated to you because you're absolutely in love with Zuko (lol), but really, because you've done the world as my best friend for me. Thank you. Forever I am in your debt. May the angels and God be with you. Your best friend forever.
:.:The End:.: