Impossible

A Gundam Wing Fan Fiction

Rambled Off by The Manwell

Book Three: PARTNERS

Heero Yuy

I've never woken up in someone's arms before.

In fact, I've never come awake so slowly it felt more like I was drifting into one of those beautiful but transient dreams I always forget the details of upon my moment of waking.

But as my eyelids gradually drift open, I know that I'm not dreaming. I know that the wrinkled Preventer uniform I have my cheek pressed against and the shoulder it conceals is Duo's. That realization in and of itself is more than enough to soothe me back into sleep.

I shift closer to him and feel myself drift on the lazy ebb and flow of consciousness. I'm not sure exactly how long I linger like this. But I know that when the synapses in my brain do actually start firing, I've managed to get myself into a rather precarious situation.

I'd just slept the entire day away in Duo's arms. Perhaps I'd even drooled on his shirt. I ought to be mortified. Once again, I'm leaning on him without regard for his preferences in the matter. But if this is my first, last, and only opportunity to experience the steady rise and fall of his chest beneath my cheek, then I'm going to take my sweet time and relish it, damn it.

Of course, I'd never anticipated him already being awake...

"It's about time you came around," Duo hums in a soft but amused whisper.

Oh, Christ. I sit up quickly, forcing down the blush I know is trying to creep up my neck. I make a show of rubbing the crust from the corners of my eyes and the circulation back into my stubbly cheeks.

"First order of business," Duo begins, shifting next to me and consequently hissing in a sharp breath, "is coaxing the circulation back into my arm."

I glance at him apologetically from beneath my bangs.

He replies with a gentle smile which I find myself returning.

"And the second order of business?" I hear myself ask.

He huffs out a brief sigh and states baldly, "Isolating your point of memory fuckage, my man."

Just that quickly, the warmth I'd borrowed from Duo deserts me. "I..." And my throat closes before I can finish my reflexive denial.

But, Duo understands. He leans closer to me and settles his hands on my shoulders. I tell myself my body is still weak – that I'm still exhausted – from everything that's happened to me and that's why I lean into his touch.

"Heero..." he tells me on a whisper of sound. "You can't let this overtake you. We both know – if you ignore it – the damage..."

I close my eyes and nod. I know the risks. The battle to undo the manipulation of my mind will be a hard, up-hill battle as it is what with weeks having passed since the event had occurred. Yes, I know the risks. But I don't know if I can do what has to be done.

But I have to try. After all, Duo will be reporting for duty next month. And I intend to be standing next to him when that happens.

Still... can I open myself to him so completely? I flinch a little at the idea of allowing anyone unrestricted access to my mind. But I trust him. And I trust him to not only act in my best interests but to make what has to be done as easy for me as possible. His unwavering presence in my therapy sessions had shown that truth to me.

"We'll have to take precautions," I hear myself whisper. "I was conditioned to resist psychological manipulation..." I don't have to tell Duo that many of the methods of resistance I'd been trained to perform are lethal.

His fingers tighten on my shoulders and even though I'm not meeting his eyes or even looking at his face I can feel his smile like a soothing balm on my prickly skin.

"Yeah..." he agrees. "That's what I figured."

And that's also why it's so imperative that we understand exactly how the doctors on the reformed Lunar Base had managed to plant the suggestion that I'd already contacted Duo. Why had my training failed? And if it had happened in this case, could it happen again? Could I fail my mission or – God forbid – Duo in the future because my abilities had become unpredictable?

The very thought of something happening to Duo because my training had failed us firms my resolve to uncover exactly what had happened in outer space. In fact, that horrifying possibility erases all lingering traces of hesitance. This has to be done. My own life and questionable mental stability is one thing, but I cannot allow myself to endanger Duo.

Drawing a deep breath, I finally look up and meet his empathizing gaze with a hard look of my own. Before the slight stirring beneath my breastbone can manifest into something more than the faintest of tingles, I hear myself demand, "When do we start?"