I tossed Lukas out of my inventory.

"Ambush!" I said, as I shot Lukas's burnt and charred corpse with my shotgun repeatedly, splattering blood all around.

Ethan reacted quickly, firing several bullets into him as well. From somewhere, Lukas drew out a bomb. I jumped onto him, shielding Ethan with my body, letting the explosion ripple through both of us. 200 damage! Broken bones. 50% reduced stats. Lukas stopped twitching. I grabbed him. "Quick, we need to get him to the trap!" I dragged him wrapping some chains around him, every movement hurting as my broken bones slowly reknitted themselves, along with heavy locks from my backpack as I dragged him out of the house.

Ethan said something. My head was wringing.

"Whaaaat." Oh, my ear drums had been blown out. I made an effort, and they regrew.

"Say that again?"

"Can't we kill him?"

I shook my head. "If you do enough damage we transform into some sort of super monster thing. Takes a lot of damage."

"Seems unfair. What happened to conservation of mass?"

"Blame Umbrella. I didn't make this virus. And voodoo magic. I assume voodoo is involved as well. Curse you, Papa Legba."

I knew that some of the bosses went to absurd sizes. Like, Simmons could turn into a kaiju sized mutant without nomming any corpses. Did they have a meat dimension like wolverine? Were they less dense than air? Was it just video game logic I should accept?

Lukas started to grow, to twitch, to pulsate. Pulling out a bottle from my bag, I started pouring fungicide all over him, the liquid burning and searing him. His transformation dying down.

Mommy, it hurts. I hurt. I always hurt, but more. What are you doing to my brother?

Just preparing a surprise family meeting.

Remember, you promised cake.

Ethan looked at me.

I glanced up. 16% mutation rate. It had spiked up two percent. My skin itched, being so close to the fungicide. We needed to find the cure.

We got him to the generator we had set up. It was hidden in the trees, away from where they would see him. I took several crocodile clips and strapped him in.

His regeneration came quickly, as I finished chaining him up.

"What did you do?" He asked, straining against the steel.

"You're strapped up to a generator." I clicked a button. Volts of electricity sped through Lukas, making him pulse and spasm. I depressed it. "Move too much, and you get shocked. Make too much noise, and you get shocked. Escape the steel chains somehow and- I gestured to the fungicide laden pipe bombs set up around him. "You get boomed."

"I'll kill you. I'll kill your family, I'll rip Ethan's face off and eat it in front of you." He said.

"Good luck."

And we walked off.

And we got back to exploring, and trying to find the other two. They were more careful now. We didn't see them, or the goo zombies much.

I did find something very very cool. Three somethings.

Steroids. Dramatically strengthens muscles. Permanent +1 strength. This benefit persists across deaths and worlds.

We had found four of those.

Stabilizer. Relaxes the muscles and reduces stress, making reloading faster. Permanent +1 dex. This benefit persists across deaths and worlds.

Jackpot. I would use them now but my hazmat suit made it hard.

"I could use them." Said Ethan, reaching out.

I quickly shook my head, greedy, and felt a sudden stab of guilt.

"No, they're… zombie… magic." I choked out, pulse racing.

It hurt a lot lying to him. I knew rationally that I needed these buffs for future worlds but…

I couldn't do it.

"Take the stabilizers. They're not zombie magic. They'll let you shoot better."

I handed them over, and he took them.

My heart was racing. "I need… I'll stay close. Give me a second. I'll be behind that tree." I gestured.

I stepped away from him. I know this was stupid, horror movie getting caught 101. But I needed relief.

I called up the perk menu, and I had indeed earned enough perk points to buy either my base form, or Clancy's. 3 points for each. I picked my one, and pulled out the laptop.

My real face looked back at me. Brown hair, beard, male, tall. I was me again. I stroked my stubble, through the hazmat suit, and slowly stopped hyperventilating. I was… me. For a bit.

I heard him coming around, and quickly switched back.

"The mutations are getting worse."

He nodded. "I can see."

I pulled out the scrap of paper we had found. Margie had tried her hardest to keep her off, but she was no match for our shotguns.

Serum documentation.

Regarding the -Series serum: the following items are needed to be able synthesize the serum.

D-series cranial nerve

D-series peripheral nerve

Adds E series virus cure to recipe list for crafting/ science.

"Soon."

Ethan patted my shoulder, and we went on looking.

Other than the stat buffs and the cure, there was a third really special item.

In a bird cage in the main house, you could slide antique coins in to get rewards. I dunno what economic games the Baker family was playing, but I had used the five fingered inhuman strength discount to get them early.

I know, I know, very disrespectful. But they did try to eat us, so.

Zoe hadn't gone quietly. She was defending several of them, and I had to tase her and hit her with my shotgun a few times before we took her to the circle. Lesson 101 of psychological horror. Don't talk to the villains. Never monologue.

Anyway, I had found a very nice pair of items. The iron defense coin, and the assault coin. They gave 20% buffs to defense and damage respectively. It was definitely voodoo.

"So" I asked, as we wondered through the morgue a low down cage area below a railing, bodies of I assumed homeless people hanging everywhere, checking each for an arm of a D series zombie, tossing my coin up and down in my hand. "Do you think this is all gonna be voodoo or something? Ancient mystical magic."

"Magic isn't real." Said Ethan.

"Not with that attitude. I'm serious. Voodoo dolls everywhere, creepy underworld keys, passages everywhere, magic coins- what's up with that? I don't really associate southern hillbillies with voodoo and secret passages, but here we go."

"Maybe they're just random items of religious symbolism they collected. A lot of families collect this sort of stuff. It is an old swamp plantation. Maybe they took it from slaves, and their ancestors liked torturing the slaves."

"Oh yeah! Maybe there'll be a tie in to RE 5 there. The Africans produced one plague. Now another." I had loved Resident Evil 5. Wait. I hadn't meant to say that.

"RE 5?" He said, curiously.

I couldn't lie to him.

"I have video game powers!"

He paused, and looked at me.

"Me too. I literally can't carry more than 12 items and whatever is in my hands now."

What did you do to my brother and sister? He was supposed to come play.

Said a text from Eve.

I'm getting all the family together for a party I sent back.

"You get more than me! I only get 8. But I can carry more. Lukas took up two spots."

He frowned. "Shotguns take up two shots for me."

I shrugged. "Just one for me. I guess my system is more generous. I think mine is going for more of a survival horror progressing to shoot em up vibe, while yours is more of a survival horror one, where resources need to be very scarce."

"Do you think I'm infected? Maybe this is some sort of HUD upgrade used to make zombies more effective. Or voodoo."

I shook my head. "I think we're in a video game. We're sentient manifestations of the characters within." This conversation felt weirdly meta.

"Like parallel world theory? Everything is true in some world? This place does seem-"

Them too.

I checked my monitoring tablets. Shiiit. A lot of zombies moving towards us, stealthily. And the Bakers were not visible anywhere.

"We need to fort up. Incoming." I said.

Thanks Eve.

Looked like the Bakers were using their supernatural control of the zombie hordes to launch an all out goo assault.

We quickly both started setting up a perimeter. I shot down several of the hanging corpses, making them into a crude fort, and Ethan started laying down proximity mines at the entrances and tables. I tossed him one of my tablets. "You control the explosives. I'll tank the fire." This was why I had taken the iron defense coin.

I don't mean to brag, but I was pretty tough. Killing Zombies and Lukas had leveled me up to level 7. I now had 210 HP, 50 HP and 20 armor from my body armor, and my almost perfect regeneration made that pretty impressive.

Almost perfect regeneration. You heal 1% of your health per second. In addition, non antifungal weapons do 50% less damage, 60% less when not against the head. Incapacitation has unpredictable results.

Coupled with the coin, which made me take 20% less damage linearly, I only took 30-20% damage from any hit. I could take a lot of firepower without being in much trouble. 6 hand gun shots from the 200 damage one.

I was a tough mother fucker.

That was what I thought, till our car drove through a wall, from some unknown hidden corridor, with Marge and Jack on it, yeehawing, and rammed straight into my chest.

I ragdolled back into the wall, smacked my head there, and heard a lot of bones snap and break.

You have suffered 800 damage. Reduced to 730 by body armor. Reduced by 70% to 300. You have broken bones. 50% reduced physical stats, -9 HP.

Fuck. I was out.

Ethan stepped up. With a firm series of shots, he ripped out the car's wheels. As it reversed and went forward, steel burning, it tilted to the side and missed my head by inches.

Then 5 seconds had passed. My regeneration finished, and I had 1 HP.

The Baker's span our car through the corpses in the morgue in circles, trying to hit Ethan and me. I dodged back, going to grab my fallen shotgun, when Ethan did something dangerous.

Ethan shouted at Marge,

"Your cooking stinks just like your son's corpse." As he spoke, a pair of zombies came through a door, and he set off an explosion, ragdolling them, as a pair of other ones hopped down from above.

Marge stepped out and began tossing insects at Ethan. Zombies, insects and Marge to handle for him.

She spoke to him.

"We open our home! We open our hearts! And what do you do?!"

I stood up and aimed to fire at the car. Jack turned towards me.

"Better start running girl!" He said. And he drove the car straight at me. I got off two shots into his head- 600 damage out of 2000- before came at me.

Flopping through the pain of having several of my bones sticking out of my body, I rolled aside as he rammed the car into the wall. He started spinning the wheel.

"I'm gonna get you!" I pulled out the strong healing herbs, and poured some over my broken skin. It quickly started to heal. I was up to full in no time. Those video game bosses who you depleted to almost nothing and had a surprise second wind? I was them. I was the cheese. I got up, and aimed my gun at Jack.

I heard several gun shots. Ethan was driving back Marge with a concentrated rain of fire. It was going well- till a fat goo zombie spat at his face, burning acid at it.

Jack managed to get the car turned enough, knocking aside a corpse, and came at me again. I had to save Ethan.

I quickly went to my perk screen. Super strength needed 50 strength. I had gotten 6 from leveling up, and 4 from the steroids, and had 40 before. I dumped my points in, and felt my muscles grow denser and tougher.

From all my collections and leveling up, I had enough perk points. 50 needed. I dumped them in.

When he drove at me, I stood firm, ignored equal and opposite physics reactions, and grabbed the car. I worked my muscles against the car engine as he growled, slowly turning it, and directed it towards Marge. Then I stepped aside.

Just as Marge was about to take care of Ethan, her husband smashed into her with the car. She was tossed to the side, wounded, and he smashed into the wall. The car burst into flames. Jack took 1000 more damage, bringing him down to 600.

Ethan quickly healed his eyes with a herb potion, and I went to Marge, grabbing her in my arms. She had a glowing chest thing. She was strong, but I was stronger.

"Shoot it!" I said. Ethan pulled his shotgun, and opened fire, smashing several powerful shots into her chest. Goo poured out.

"Gonna get ya! Try and get away from my babies cocksucker!" She shouted, and she slapped my face. Ants and caterpillars and spiders started crawling up into my face, biting and ripping at my nostrils and inside my skull.

I heard the vrumming of a chainsaw.

"Oh, girl, look what you've done you mother fucker!"

I had just enough time to look behind me, as the flaming Jack pulled out a double chainsaw, and sliced me in half. I felt loss, as part of me fell away, and the pain in my lower half reduced to nothing.

150 damage done! Mobility reduced by 50% and bottom half lost.

He picked me up, my flesh searing and cooking, and held up my top half, laughing, as I was in agony from the insects crawling through me, taking 20 damage every second... I had to stop this. I couldn't take much more.

20 HP left.

I grabbed him, with just as much strength as him now, and head butted him.

10 damage done to both of you! 10 HP left.

The searing flames sterilized the bugs, and he snapped back, like a car hit him, as did I. I quickly crawled over on my hands towards my lower half when a goo zombie leapt at me, wrestling me. I pulled out a handgun and shot it, but I missed the second shot, my damaged eyes not fully regenerated. It leaned forward to bite into me.

Ethan blasted it with a shotgun, running away from Marguerite's corpselike body, and the insects, and kicked my lower half to me. "Thanks!" I said, as I pulled out a potion to pour over it, sealing it back onto me, and restoring my health from a sliver up to full.

Just as Jack, still aflame, now at 200 HP, charged into me, ramming me to the ground. He pressed the chainsaws at me, and I grabbed them with my hands. They sawed into me, a steady 10 HP a second lost, but my hands were tough. With brutish strength, and super spy skills, I kicked up with my legs, tossing him over my head, and took control of the double chainsaw, mounting him, pushing down with my strength, trying to slice at him. As I got close to his neck, his head suddenly bulged up, the flesh resisting as it went red, flinging off flames. My dry, fungi body started to burn, losing me another 10 HP a second. I was down to 147.

Ethan had driven Marge back to a table, cornering her, and had cut off her retreat. As she released a massive swarm of spiders, he drew out a makeshift flamethrower and pressed closer in, burning mugs.

And a cloud of spiders rushed over us both, dousing Jack's flames, and doing another 30 damage to me. Jack kicked me, and I flew back across the room, smacking into the wall. 200 damage, down to 60. Not too bad. I ducked and rolled, clearing the flames, and got up. Jack had rushed towards Marge, taking hits for her, his monstrous regeneration accelerated now. 200 a second, enough to outpace his burning damage, worms of flesh refilling his broken body visibly fast.

Marge and Jack stood together, her at 300 Jack at 500

"I can't die." he said. "But you can." And started towards us.

I was at 60. Not much left in the tank.

"I know. But she can." I said.

I took out a can of Raid, bug spray, and tossed it at Marge. Ethan skillfully blasted it out of the air with his shotgun. The can exploded, and she screamed, all her bugs dying, taking 100 damage.

She fell back, her chest glowing with the insect hide within, and Jack started marching towards us.

Then we both opened fire, filling her glowing spots with hot shotgun lead, loaded with a little extra fungicide.

"I'm gonna tear your fucking face off and eat your scrawny head!" She shouted, and released a massive storm of insects, enough to distract our fire, down to 100 now.

And Ethan, because we had cameras and explosives set up and were not fighting fair, detonated an explosive right behind her. Nails, fungicide, and explosive blasted into her. 200 damage.

The bugs quickly vanished, leaving a shocked, double chainsaw wielding, 2000 HP charred Jack, and his dead wife.

"You killed everyone I loved! I'll kill you!" He said, and charged forward, as two of the remaining three goo zombies charged me. I grabbed one's arm, and smashed it into the other like a battering ram, knocking it into the wall, and tossed the remaining one at Jack. He sliced it apart as he charged at Ethan, who was distracted blasting the fat zombie who spat goo.

I leapt forward, and but didn't have time to do anything fancy but grab the blades.

I was up to 70 now, but ticking down fast. And he felt even stronger. I couldn't resist. I was smashed to the floor, dirty and stinking with blood, and felt his overwhelming strength on me.

50

Ethan turned, and blasted him with his shotgun, emptying his clip 1200.

"Boy, that gun isn't gonna work the way you think it will." He said, and went back to trying to slice off my head, the chainsaw revving through my slashed up head.

30.

Ethan reloaded quickly, and emptied another clip into Jack's head. It was pulped, damaged, but he wasn't going down. 600. His regenerating didn't seem to be kicking in any more. Burnt out maybe? But I was almost out. The chainsaw was slicing through my hands, only stopped by my bones.

10 HP left.

I activated the special ability of Super Strength. It was me on my own again. I needed to finish this. Through the burning I felt chill, and I felt strength pulse through my arms, and I forced the chainsaw back, slicing at Jack's neck.

Suddenly, he grew weaker, the red pulsing mass filling his head, protecting him. I kept pushing and kept pushing but he just wouldn't die. Then I remembered. Ethan. Yes.

"Now!" I said, as Ethan unloaded another clip of firepower into him, and I turned the chainsaw back on Jack, grabbing it. I pushed with brutish strength, slicing and sawing into him and then- forced it through his body. He was almost down- and there. He exploded, in a mess of blood.

I collapsed on my butt, and laughed and laughed and laughed madly.

"That's what you get, fuckers. You didn't focus your dps, and we out healed you! We are family!" I said, and flopped on the floor.

Level up! Level up! For killing two boss level encounters, you have gained enough exp to level up twice. Your disease control has leveled up to level 30, and your shooting has advanced to level 6. You have gained the title zombie slayer! 100% increased damage to zombies when equipped.

Oh yeah. I was exposed to pheromones. I looked up to the meter. 95% corruption.

An old woman stepped out from the door, shambling towards us. I saw a flash, and she was Eve.

Ohhh. Her picture had been outside my cell. They were one and the same? Made sense. Zombie magic again? Or maybe she was like some voodoo deity that was maiden mother and crone?

Ethan raised his gun. I gestured at him to lower it, and winked.

"Is that any way to treat our daughter?" I said.

Was she our daughter? I still had been a little too nervous to ask. But it was too late to back down now.

"We're here for you. And it's time to end your suffering." I said.

Material sciences and sciences in general here were advanced. From my backpack, I pulled out an intact syringe filled with a shitload of heroin.

A lot of her texts had talked about pain. Whatever the Baker family or the Umbrella corp or whoever had done to her, it hurt her. Always. She sought the distraction of family. I could see more now why.

And that's why heroin existed.

She growled at me. "You're just gonna take me away! For experiments." I shook my head.

My corruption meter ticked up to 100% and I felt myself losing control. My will was stronger though. I activated Desperate Struggle.

Desperate struggle. Your will to fight, to live, to stay alive in the face of terrible injuries. Regain 10 HP and remove 10% of a stat debuff. Can cause long term damage, and is only usable once per month, requiring substantial rest to heal.

The corruption ticked down. I would not let this curse claim me.

I stabbed the needle into my neck, and injected the heroin into myself. I then opened psychic network.

Psychic network! Through the use of fungal pheromones you can communicate your will, pictures, and ideas to other infected. Short ranged (5 feet)

I pushed my truthfulness into my will, trying to fill her mind with images of calm, and love, as the heroin gripped me.

"Trust your mother." I said. I pulled her old, decrepit body close to mine, and felt the intensity of her pain, her tortured limbs, her agony at the world.

She looked down. "It hurts! It hurts! It hurts!" She said.

"Are you a good daughter?"

"I'm a good daughter." I then injected the heroin into her neck as well. We soon both flopped to the ground, in a mess of pain.

"You have a mother and father who will really care for you now. Rest." I said. And we flopped to the ground.

I woke up a while later, at our Lukas and Zoe filled campsite.

I sat up, woozy. "Did you… double double double double." I flopped down.

He nodded. "I burnt Jack and Marguerite." I sighed. "And the nerves?"

He held up a black arm. "I found the hidden shrine. And all the rest." He gestured.

135 perk points from all the collectibles and the bosses. 90 from the level ups. 2 stat points left. It was a solid haul.

My corruption meter was at 100% of course. No side effects. Eve was sleeping fine.

"I worked out what was wrong with Eve. They made a mistake in the telemere regeneration protein." Medical science was also absurdly advanced, enough for you to have field DNA test kits.

"Probably intentional. So if she ran off she'd be useless." I said, making a dirt angel with my hands. This heroin felt so nice. Wooo.

"I think I can make two cures from what we have left. One for you, and one for her. The D series has greater regenerative properties.

I nodded. "Sounds good."

"Wait!" Zoe said. Lukas was sulking.

"I'm not with them! I was trying to help you."

"I heard your first call on the phone. He did too. You told us to go up to the attic. Jack was waiting there." I had relaxed my no talking to psychos rule once, to prove to him what she was like.

"I didn't know. I don't know everything. I just know what they're like. You can't trust her."

This wasn't the happiest trip.

"Your family kidnapped poor Eveline, kidnapped hosts of homeless people, you lure people into your dad's grip, you have so much voodoo and so many secret passages it's crazy- and you expect me to believe the innocent little is untrustworthy."

"We found her! In a storm! She made us do it. But not me. I resisted her. The voodoo- it was just a hobby."

"That defense didn't work for the Nazis. It won't work for you. You're a bunch of creepy, evil, hillbilly cannibals obsessed with voodoo, and I don't trust you at all."

Lukas used this chance to make an escape. Resisting the electricity, his body suddenly pulsed to massive size-

And then was ripped to shreds by multiple fungicide loaded pipe bombs set all around him. Blood splattered Zoe.

She screamed and held her hands in front of her face.

"Why…?"

She asked.

Ooh, level up. 35 more perk points and a stat point. Jackpot!

I got up awkwardly. "Look, I'm not sure if I think you actually are bad. But I don't trust you. Not one bit. What's taking so long with the cure?"

I got up slowly, my limbs heavy with heroin, and walked over to Ethan.

"I can't get the components to bond. They need some catalyst, to hold them together, but I can't work out." I peered through the microscope, scanned the results of the gas chromatography machine. The answer was clear.

I took one of our herbs, and one of the strong chem fluids. I swished it in my mouth, chewing it up, and then spat it in the test tube.

Scientist title ftw.

"Does that work?" He took a tissue sample and tested it. "Yes! It heals it."

I sighed and flopped back down.

"Sciennnnce!" And collapsed. "Heroinnn. It's not that I'm an addict. I'm an addict to not feeling pain." This euphoria was amazing. No more soreness. No more being eaten by bugs. No more being cut in half by a flaming zombie. Now I could just chill. I felt so connected with the world. Like we were one.

He injected me first. I saw the corruption meter going down, as the fungi stabilized in me. Then he looked at Eveline.

"Are you sure?"

Zoe looked up again.

"No, don't give to her."

I nodded. "Yeah. I'm sure. Do it. And bring the cake." I pulled myself up, and crawled over to Eveline, pulling her into my arms. Ethan came over, a cake saying "The cake is not a lie" In one hand, and a syringe in the other. He placed the cake down. As the needle pierced her neck, injecting the cure, she flinched.

"You're safe." And then slowly reverted back to the form of a little girl with black hair.

For getting two companions to devoted, you have unlocked the companion perk! You can take as many companions as you like from other worlds. Each person takes up two inventory slots.

"Yes please." My family. I tagged them both.

The coin, the shotgun, a toolkit, and four strong medicines were going with me. I loaded up as much other useful stuff as I could on those two. Eveline ate meat pie cake. I had all the electronics of resident evil, I had their downloaded medical texts, I had bioscience machines, all stuffed in my inventory cubes. I had the fungi zombie virus stored. If I went back to my homeland now, I could advance science decades, or start the apocalypse if I so chose.

I felt the end coming. I had won. I had won, and gained two powerful new allies. And more than that- I was high on heroin. I could get used to this.

Now he has the first potentially world ending threat! With careful planning and a world not prepared for a surprise mind controlling zombie Eveline, he could take control of the world.

The car boss fight and the chainsaw boss fight were the best, so I mixed them up. Insect was ok, but, eh. Bugs flying at you. Not the most exciting. Still, Marguerite is fun to play with.

Remember raiders, always stick with the group and don't be drawn off by aggro. Never split the party.

Back to Saw next time.

Zackman2k12. You're welcome, it's fun to both read your reviews and write this as well.

Thorison1080. The lovely lizard is great fun, and that would make a good phone, especially if he was also navigating an SCP breach.

Dr Cookie Cutter. The hazmat suit is stored on one of his companions. And yeah, there is always the option of surrendering to fate and dying a quick death.

Gatling 2745. Yeah, Saw 2 isn't too hard to work through. Which means he is gonna try his best to get out of it loaded. Poison Maniac would definitely help, yeah.

Dragonbornthesam. Resident evil is canon for the real world, confirmed.

DG2. Yep, he'll be getting a bunch of disguise perks soon.

Juneur5. Thanks.

See you next time with new perks and Saw 2.