Chapter 58 - Berate

As soon as the SWAT team went in, Lex stationed himself outside of the building, ready to greet Pamela as soon as she came out.

He was still stinging badly from the comments Clark had made—one about having called Clark in for no reason, and the other about allowing his father to die again. Lex had done a lot of work to convince himself leaving his father to die in that tornado hadn't been an unforgivable act, but he wasn't ready to do it again. Still, he knew exactly how much trouble it could have spelled if Clark had run into the building using his powers for Lex's father to see, and he knew how dangerous it could have been if the alarms had been tripped.

But it didn't matter now. Pamela was safe, and so was Lex's father. That was what mattered.

A minute later, Pamela emerged from the building. Two men were supporting her by the arms; her feet only touched the floor lightly, and her legs shook so much that he could see the trembling from a distance. She gave Lex a weak smile, and she looked so pale, so fragile. Guilt weighed on him, and he made up his mind that he was going to tell her the whole truth of what he had done. If she wanted to berate him for it, he far, far more than deserved that.

He rushed forward to envelope her in his arms, though her returned embrace was so weak he felt as though he were carrying her. He let go and turned to the men who had been supporting her. "Take her to my helicopter," he said. "I'll be there in a minute. Pamela, I have something to tell you."

She nodded, and they left.

Clark made his way over to Lex a moment after they were gone. "I was just talking with some of the police officers. Did you hear what Pamela did?"

"Yeah."

"She was trying to climb through the vents. She has cancer, Lex, she's not up to that. Anything could have happened to her."

"But it didn't, Clark. They're safe."

"But it could have. And you were going to let it happen."

Lex whirled to face Clark. "What are you trying to say?"

Clark straightened up to his full height. "You called me to come out here, and then you didn't even let me help."

"I didn't want you to expose yourself—"

"I take that risk all the time, Lex. It's my destiny to help people, and I don't hold back just because it might be dangerous."

"It wasn't just going to be dangerous for you. I didn't want to risk Pamela and my father's lives, either."

"You're the one who called those guys in, aren't you?"

Lex swallowed. "I didn't know they were going to try to break into the vault."

"You gonna tell Pamela the truth?"

"Of course."

Clark stared at Lex for a long moment, then said, "Next time, I'm going in. I don't care what you say."

"Fine." There was nothing Lex could say to stop him. "Want a ride back? There's room for one more in the helicopter."

"No, I'll just run. I'll see you tomorrow."

"Okay." Lex really didn't want to leave things like that, but he also didn't really want to talk to Clark anymore while Clark was still upset with him. Better to let them both cool down.

He was about to turn back to his helicopter when Lionel wheeled out of the building. "Lex," he said, with an insidious grin.

Lex's jaw pulsed. "Dad."

"What a surprise to find you out here."

"I want you to know I was doing everything I could—"

"Oh, I'm sure you did a great deal."

Lex couldn't quite tell from his father's icy stare whether he had figured out what had happened. He almost wished he'd brought Ryan along instead of Clark.

"In fact, I came out here to thank you, son. I believe that kick of adrenaline was, ah—" he cleared his throat— "just what I needed. You know what I mean?"

"I can't imagine," Lex said, although he could feel his pulse in the whites of his eyes.

"It was just what I needed to clear my mind."

This time, Lex didn't need a mind reader. He just knew.

His father remembered everything.

Lionel wheeled past close enough to give Lex a rough pat on the arm. "Good talk," he said, and he left.

Lex hadn't quite recovered yet when his cell phone started ringing. It was the Kent house—that meant it was one of Clark's parents. Lex would have been willing to bet his inheritance which one it would turn out to be. He brought the phone to his ear hesitantly. "Hello?"

"Lex? Is Clark with you?"

"No, Mr. Kent, he's on his way home."

"My wife tells me you found bugs in the study."

"Yes, but—"

"How could you have been so irresponsible? I trusted you, Lex, I was really trying to extend an olive branch."

"Mr. Kent, I had no idea my father was spying on me—"

"This is what we get for getting tangled up with Luthors."

It felt as though the air had been pressed out of Lex's lungs. He knew Jonathan was making the call in the anger of the moment, and that both Clark and Martha would talk him down later on—and if they had no luck, Pamela and Ryan might start in on him. But for right now, Lex still had to contend with the burn of the scolding. He spoke in a low voice, even though he was out of earshot of anyone at the moment. "Mr. Kent. Clark and I do most of our discussion about his powers in the experiment room, and we always—"

"Most?"

Lex tried again. "I can't control what my father does. Believe me, I wish I could." Lex considered telling Jonathan that he'd send people in to bug LuthorCorp in part to protect Clark, but he decided not to divulge his morally questionable activity just then. Then he considered advising Jonathan to check his own home for bugs rather than blaming Lex for having them at his own office, but Jonathan's emotional reaction was usually to blame Lex for anything his father did, so he doubted it would help. So he settled on, "I'm on Clark's side in all of this and I'll do everything I can to protect him, I swear."

"You'd better," was all Jonathan said before he hung up.

This time, Clark wasn't there to stop Lex's phone from shattering to bits as he threw it to the concrete.

Lex trudged back to his helicopter. He'd almost forgotten that he'd sent Pamela to wait for him. She was curled up in the seat, her head against the window, eyes closed, but they fluttered open when he opened the door and sat down beside her.

"Hey," she said softly, smiling. "What took you?"

"Just wrapping things up with the police." He knew it was a half-truth, and she wouldn't be thrilled if she knew, but he was in too much pain to discuss his conversations with Clark, or with his father, or with Jonathan.

"Do they have any idea who sent those guys into the building?"

"They, ah, they don't know." Lex's mouth felt dry.

She nodded slowly. "Alexander, you said you had something to tell me."

"Ah. Yeah." He breathed in to confess the truth.

And then he couldn't do it.

He was too sore. He couldn't take another scolding, no matter how much he deserved it, or rather, because he deserved it. The undeserved lectures had been easier to accept. So instead, he said, "I wanted to tell you that . . . you're like a mom to me."

She gave him a look. "Alexander, I knew that."

"I mean it, though. If I lost you, it would be like losing my mother all over again. When I talked to the police about you . . . I wanted to say my mom." Strictly speaking, it wasn't a lie, not exactly. He hadn't actually been thinking about that when he was speaking to the police, but that didn't mean it wasn't true. He did feel that way about her.

Tears filled her eyes. "Come here," she said, holding an arm out to him.

He slid over to her on the seat and wrapped an arm around her, and she leaned her head against his chest.

The worst part of it all was that he didn't regret lying. He knew he would, eventually, but right now, this was what he needed.

Lex settled down in his study after he'd walked Pamela back to her little cottage and made sure she had everything she needed for the evening.

He'd left the paper with the first ten or so equations from the cave wall sitting on his desk. He almost pushed it aside, but ended up staring at it again instead. He'd looked at that first equation for so long, he almost had it memorized:

6(1x6+2x8)+6(2x1+1x8) = 1(6x6+12x1+6x8)+6(2x8)

He tried to focus on the numbers to keep his mind from wandering off to other things, things that hurt too much to think about, but he couldn't help it. Jonathan probably wouldn't want Clark coming over to the mansion to experiment for a little while, at least not until some of the drama with Lex's father had been cleared up. And Lex didn't even blame Jonathan for that.

Maybe they could still be friends in the meantime, though. Maybe Lex could help Clark with his homework or something. Clark had mentioned needing to work on chemistry. Lex had always preferred biology, but there was still a fair amount of chem in bio. He still remembered most of the chemical equations he'd learned in his cell biology class . . .

Oh. OH.

He checked the time—it wasn't nine yet, still early enough to avoid Jonathan's wrath—before picking up the phone and calling Clark.

Clark picked up after four rings. "Hello?"

"Clark. I know what these numbers mean."

A/N: I always enjoy hearing your thoughts, including guesses if you have any!

Also, side note, ignore if not interested—today is the release day for my second original fantasy novel, and to celebrate, I've (temporarily) made my first novel free. If you have any interest, check out kaylienight dot com :)