Nirvana
July 16, 3:12 A.M.
A journal. Thanks Aunt Milly for your thoughtful, but completely USELESS present. I'm sure I'll write in it everyday.
3:13
You know, I just might. Another thing to add to my list of why I have no life…which is why I don't have any need for my journal. If I were to become a brilliant heroine one day I might need it to tell the world the true story of how Lily Evan's brain works. But I won't. A) If I were to face a great villain like You-Know-Who (actually you don't know who) I'd probably wet myself. Seriously. Or I'd be scared as shit. B) I'll never be able to get through school with Potter courting me. His idea of impressing the gals is to turn random people upside down and show their undies. Almost blinding someone is not exactly the best way to win a girl's heart. C) Do the words sugar high, insane Lily strike terror in your heart? I'd probably freak everybody out.
3:15
What in the name of- (here, the writing trails off)
That owl pecked me! Stupid owl! Well, no wonder I hate it so much! It belongs to Potter!
My Adorable Angel, Lily,
If you don't tell me you love me, I'll become a hermit and live on roots and berries 'til the end of my days! Please, I beg of you, darling, go out with me!
Love, Your Ardent and Passionate Lover,
James
What in the name of chocolate haters! When I get back to Hogwarts, I'll hex him to oblivion! That stupid prick!
3:20
Ha! Let's see how much he likes my response!
Dear Stupid Moron,
Go to hell.
Lily
3:30
HOLY SHIT! I don't want to become pen pals with Potter!
My Beautiful and Glorious Sunshine,
Only if you go with me.
James.
Scratch the hexing! I'LL KILL HIM! But first I'll torture him!
Dear Idiotic Imbecile,
I'm not going anywhere with you! So stop owling me!
Lily
3:40
I'll gouge his eyes out!
Sugar Sweetie-pie,
That's where you're wrong. We're going to the Head's dorms together, whether you like it or not.
Love, James.
WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT! This can't be happening to me!
Dear Dim-wit,
HAS DUMBLEDORE GONE SENILE!
Lily
3:50
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! If you hate me so much Lord, why don't you say so instead of torturing me!
Honey Sweetums,
I don't know. But if he is, all the better for me! One year with my darling babe!
James
He did NOT call me a babe!
Dear Crazy-Idiot-With-A-Death-Wish,
Stop with the names! And stop owling me! Or else!
Lily
4:00
Grrr….
Darling Dearest,
Whatever for, Honeybun? Sweetie-pie, don't you like the names? Glorious, beauteous, divine apparition, I bet you secretly do love the pet names I call you.
James
P.S. Or else what?
Bloody hell!
Or else I'll make sure you wished that You-Know-Who and his Death Eaters had gotten to you first! And I'm going to sleep now! SO SOD OFF!
Lily
4:15
Finally, some peace and quiet. Nirvana. Heaven at last. All that anger makes me hungry. Time for chocolate. Milk Chocolate or Dark Chocolate? Or both?