A/N: The Third BCD Chapter.
Boy oh boy, do I love BCD chapters… The sarcasm. Unfortunately, I've had to take some… liberties with Shiki's experiences and personality traits. Kill me later.
From a young age, Shiki knew that his family wasn't 'normal'. He remembered the first time his mother drank from him, the sense of her entitlement and the worthlessness he felt. Even when he had learned why, he was sure it had been his fault. In fact, there were only a few things he was good at. The first was not letting anyone in. The second… Well, that was hardly a secret.
Be the Monster:
"Shiki…." Touya whispered, shaking his shoulder. The brunette was happier asleep. For some unknown reason, his dreams kept the monsters at bay. Touya was only a few months younger than him yet, her name was well known. Perhaps it was her parents who kept her safe, Shiki thought, hiding the disgust. Even then, his eyes softened with regret. No, he wouldn't wish his trials with the industry on anyone – especially the cute blonde who was able to demand he be treated as an equal.
"Hmm?" He finally replied. He thought she knew he wasn't actually asleep. But, he could never tell with her. He rolled over to her outstretched hand, clutching the hanger. He sighed and rolled back.
"You coming or what?" She questioned, throwing the clothing on top of him and left the room. He sighed, lifting himself off the bed. He glared towards the door as he dressed. Shouldn't Cross Academy have some sort of division for women and men? He almost snorted. Women, yes. Men? They deserved no such thing, apparently.
His stomach roiled as he dressed, his mouth covered in distaste. He had many roles in this industry; the most common Touya joked about. But, was it a joke if it was true? He could still taste him on his tongue. No matter how many times he tried to coat it with his own sick, it still remained. But, he told himself he'd let her joke about it. As long as no one in the dorm knew.
The producers knew, of course. He had seemed compliant in their capable hands. He had mastered his bored expression for this purpose, hoping no one would see it as him being dead inside. Was this what they meant, he thought, when they said never mix business with pleasure?
With every pay cheque, he could cover something. With every careful stare, he knew he could do more. People questioned why he didn't have his magazines on display. The answer was simple: he burned them. But then, they'd question why. It was better for fans to think him humble than to bring that to light.
His body wasn't his own. His blood wasn't his own. He filled his duty as he should, choosing drink more often than he should. He was the good-looking guy on someone's arm, the hired chaperone. And, Cross Academy had a lot of others who didn't own their will. People like him.
That's how he viewed Ichijo. Just another man following duty. A happy façade, pleasant. How much was he paid for it? How much did he have to lose for it? Perhaps he sensed Ichijo had as much to lose as he did. The anger. It intoxicated the brunette, shaking him to his core. Perhaps that feeling was returned and that's how they wound up sharing a room.
Yet, for all the time they spent at the Academy, Shiki only tasted his blood once. Once was enough, he thought. It was no use to pursue. He had his callings as Shiki had his. Still, it was easier to imagine Ichijo as his protector and lover than his manager. Regardless, he let it be.
Until Sara. Even now, Shiki referred to her as the Succubus from Skankdom. Shiki was by his side the whole time, refusing to let him be dragged further into her dramas. Ichijo was his strength and yet… Shiki swallowed audibly and crawled under the blankets, burrowing his face in Ichijo's hair.
He hadn't noticed Touya's entrance until she threw the packaged junk food at his head and took her usual place by Ichijo's side. Shiki knew she was just as tired as he. "What if he dies?"
Shiki protectively covered his ears, glowering at her. "Don't give him any ideas. He won't die."
"I'm only saying –"
"If he dies, I die with him." He stated matter-of-factly. He unwound himself, his eyes falling to Ichijo's face. Memorized, he traced his lips, his cheekbones.
"Senri…" The voice. He recognized it from the first day at the Academy. It had become her soothing, you won't like what I have to say trademark. He bit his lip, ready for the blow. "Do you love him?"
"Course I love him, Ri. He's my best friend."
"First off, cruel. I'm your best friend." She muttered the last under her breath. He exhaled, annoyed by her constant blabbering. "I meant… I mean… Do you love him? Relationship wise?"
All he could manage was a nod. She had left shortly after. Shiki stayed awake, changing the cold towel on his head all the while asking himself when. When had he started doting, loving this stupid man who couldn't see a manipulator in front of his face? As he soothed him, he wondered if he was sure he could carry out what he said he would. Every sleeping rampage, he wondered if Ichijo could love him, too.
He wasn't sure how long it took between the time of the realization of his feelings and the first few months after Ichijo woke. Ichijo had changed – be it ever so slightly. He didn't know if it was only for him but, if it were, he'd be pleased. He loved the way Ichijo held him like a teddy bear, his grip tightening after every nightmare. Loved the way he stayed by his side, the whispered nothings in his ear leaving Shiki breathless. Most of all, he loved that Ichijo made him feel something. But, even now, Shiki's partner never uttered the word 'love'.
Shiki emerged from the meeting, visibly shaken. Kaname had requested his presence – alone. He hadn't been comfortable meeting him even with Ichijo's encouragement. Even if they were cousins, it wasn't something he enjoyed.
It had been brief. Perhaps that was for Shiki's benefit. But, it was an order. One that bothered him. Kaname wouldn't tell him why his pursuit should change – only to leave.
It was almost too easy to leave, physically. Shiki had packed light under the idea that he could wear whatever clothes he modeled. Figurines were almost nothing to throw in a bag. Even the day was perfect. Ichijo would be busy trying to assuage his grandfather and wind up getting an entire lecture. It pained Shiki to know he couldn't be here for him. Still, his few belongings rested against the door.
Touya had tagged along, the nosey person she was. She had tried to make him laugh, wearing his hats that were obviously too big. She sighed as Shiki sat on the couch, turning the engagement ring around his finger. "Did he cheat on you or something?"
"…" No. It's what he has to do. How he wanted to tell her. But, she wouldn't understand. Or, maybe she would. But, he knew for a fact she'd be the one to convince him to stay. "… Or something."
"Did he…" She gestured to a quick smack across the face. Shiki almost grinned. After all these years… No, he wouldn't tell her what they got up to.
"Nothing like that."
"But… You seem to love each other."
"He hasn't said that, either."
"Does he have to?"
"… Just… Put it in the car."
"Leave him a note." She insisted.
"And say… What?" His question added to the guilt. Kaname had told him specifically not to influence Ichijo as he'd speak to him himself.
"Say…" She huffed and sank on the couch. "It'd help if I knew the situation."
"I'm not sharing it."
She tsked, kicking his shin. "Is this a long-term thing or…"
"I don't know."
"Then… Wish him every happiness in the world. You want him to be happy, don't you?"
Shiki assented, leaving the ring with Ichijo.
"Something's bothering you." Ichijo insisted upon seeing him at the engagement party. He examined his ex, the last bite marks still not quite faded but easily hidden behind his hair. He had done his mandatory rounds yet, his eyes always fell to the silent brunette in the corner. To his credit, Shiki was a master of the poker face though, his little ticks of tracing his finger or rubbing the strands of his hair between two fingers had been Ichijo's signs. Through the partial bond, it was static.
"Everything's fine. How are you, Ichijo?" He greeted.
Ichijo wanted to blow up. He wanted to shake him, ask him. The meeting with Kaname was less informative than the man himself. All he knew was that he was hurting. His own deductions led to Kiryuu but, even if that was it, he could still have Shiki. It didn't mean it was over.
He swallowed his emotions down, bowing his head. No, he thought, it's… It's me. It's me who messed it up… Somehow. "I'm fine, thank you."
Shiki only nodded, taking his drink away from the vicinity. Ichijo rested against the table, his hands shaking. Why hadn't he brought up the ring? Why not ask what he could have done differently? His heart sunk to his stomach, nausea hitting him full force. Still, he stood tall as his presumed assignment arrived.
Ichijo would admit that he was attractive. Even stalking the crowd, appearing more like the beast rather than the prey near the outskirts of the dance floor… It was the danger, Ichijo thought, that attracted Kain.
Near him, the traditional Touya fight started. Ichijo never paid it any heed, knowing that Touya's temper was fiery and her tongue worse until she ran off, frustrated, confused, hurt. Shiki would expect him to comfort her. But, he thought to himself, she's the one who put herself in harms way. As he studied Kiryuu, he noted that he had the same intentions. Ichijo shook his head and dashed towards him, placing a hand on his bicep. "Rima can handle it."
The words didn't calm the Hunter. Ichijo dragged him over to one of the buffet tables, twisting him around as he became aggravated. "She's heard it all by now."
He almost laughed when Kiryuu tried to use his legs. "Careful now – don't create a scene."
That seemed to have done the trick. The bitch was loyal to Kain. Important information. The other huffed, finally relaxing. Ichijo relaxed his grip. "Good boy."
"Ichijo." Kiryuu almost spat, the dark threat of his gaze only too clear. "To what do I owe the pleasure?"
"Please, the pleasure's all mine." Kiryuu was not amused. Strange – charm usually does me some good. He plucked two champagne glasses. "I'd be happy to inform you of everything that's happening if you're feeling a little lost."
And, award winning smile. He hoped his manipulation worked, focusing on the trouble at hand and followed his gaze. He hadn't even been paying attention. "She won't do anything stupid. I know that much. Just say some words."
"I'd like to check on Yori."
Ichijo raised a brow. "That won't be necessary. Rima will follow her once she gets it out of her system."
Kiryuu smirked. Ichijo thought it meant progress… Until the silver-haired boy spoke. "Shouldn't you be entertaining your fiancé instead of bothering me?"
He tried not to appear hurt, avoiding the direction Shiki had just gone. "We broke it off."
"Why?"
Rage filled Ichijo. He tried to release some of it, sighing heavily. How was he supposed to befriend him? Unless… His stomach recoiled at the thought. "I don't know. But, I do know I find you intrigue—"
Souen. She had appeared out of nowhere, messing with whatever progress he just made. Still, he smiled politely. "I can't deny the bride to be anything, can I?"
He watched him go, almost jumping when one of the security guards tapped his shoulder. The burly man leaned forward. "Master Kuran requests your presence."
"Where?" Ichijo asked, setting his drink. He followed him to the front doors, excusing himself as he leaned against the archway. "Fashionably late as always."
Kaname only smiled. "Yuuki's already inside. Apparently, she's had a very long day."
"You know—"
"Oh, I know." He sat on the steps. "What's your plan?"
"I honestly don't even know what I'm doing."
Kaname shrugged. "Sorry. I didn't feel safe going into a lot of detail."
"Mm." Ichijo sat next to him. "Then, what is the plan?"
"Kain's been compromised, as you know. It's only natural."
"To pawn him off to me." Ichijo finished, nodding. He frowned. "But, I'm not good at the whole poker face deal. Senri would have been a better choice."
"Senri isn't as close to me as you are. And… I did have to take into account of Kain's preferences."
Ichijo made a fist. "Pardon?"
"What's the fastest way to make a vampire mad?" Kaname questioned. "Given Kain's previous thoughts, it should leave Kiryuu vulnerable."
"Previous…" Ichijo covered his mouth. "Kain liked Senri?"
"You didn't know? Even Senri knew that one." Kaname patted Ichijo's back sympathetically. "Once Kiryuu is in place and obedient, you and Senri can continue as you were."
"How long will it take?" Ichijo questioned after several minutes of processing.
"However long it takes."
With newfound purpose, Ichijo returned to his post. He felt odd about the sudden protectiveness over Kiryuu. Especially with the way that Kain held him tightly. Kiryuu's posture changed as well, the beast no longer inside a cage but sleeping. Ichijo stared in awe. Alone, the Kurans put Kiryuu on edge, his hands tightening into fists. Upon Kain's touch, he relaxed a little. How… Ichijo was flabbergasted. The Great, Unshakeable, Unattached Kiryuu calming to the Unattached and Unloveable Kain's touch baffled him. Even more so when the Hunter didn't recoil from the touch but rather, shared a glance much like the one Shiki would give him.
He followed Kiryuu, wondering if the actions were transferable and he would just need time. The other was already in conversation with Touya and Wakaba when Ichijo sat. "Think you should have let someone else deal with it."
"Like who?" Touya questioned, her haughty arrogance and temper flaring. Ichijo sometimes wished he could wear his emotions as openly.
"Well, Kiryuu was going to step in on your behalf. But, I managed to stop him."
Touya ignored Ichijo, probably still angry with him for whatever excuse Shiki came up with. "Kiryuu, you know mama can handle herself."
"Yes, with mascara down her cheeks." Kiryuu answered back. Ichijo hid the grin as the model ran past.
Wakaba was not impressed. "You know image is everything with models and yet… At least she got them kicked out."
"How?"
"Apparently, being best friends with Kain has a few benefits." Ichijo considered her words, wondering if Kain had used his influence in Kiryuu's favour as well. "By the by, I'm sorry you have to be with us. I know you'd prefer to be nearer to Kain."
"Kain has a few too many things…" Ichijo chanced a glance, his feeling his heart slow to a dead stop. Shiki had his back to him, lifting food to Kain's mouth. He wouldn't watch if Kain ate it. He blinked a couple of times, noticing that Kiryuu had escaped. Wakaba pointed the direction, her keen instincts of his discomfort on par. He offered a smile though, if she knew his purposes, he'd be sporting a black eye.
"You alright, Kiryuu?" Ichijo asked as he approached the cigarette smoke that wafted towards him.
"Mm. Must be hard to witness Shiki doing that."
Kiryuu ignored the hurt. Was he trying to sympathize? "… And harder for Kain to accept."
Zero ignored it. Ichijo tried again, resting his elbows on the railing. His thoughts drifted to Shiki, the brunette in his arms staring at the starry sky. He hadn't realized he had been lamenting. "It's stupid to move for someone else. I miss the sounds of the city, the constant excitement. I'm sure it's the same way with you."
Kiryuu shrugged. "It'd prefer a peaceful life. Too much excitement usually leads to bad things."
You don't know the half of it. Ichijo thought.
A/N: Just angry face. I hurt Shiki, I hurt Ichijo, I hurt Kain, I hurt Kiryuu. It's just been a shit time with this chapter. Thank God the retellings over!