Jayne opened up a package of dried noodles and dropped it into a bowl. He poured boiling water over the bowl and let it sit. He turned around and jumped. The gorram crazy girl was standing behind him.
"Whatcha doin here Crazy?" he asked, looking over her head.
"Dried thin processed strips of protein with a chicken flavored broth," she answered.
Jayne looked over at his bowl of noodles, "Ya can't have any of my noodles dong ma?" River tilted her head in response.
"She does not require much sustenance to exist. Just the broth with suffice." There was a hungry look to her eyes, and Jayne got the feelin that this was about more than just the noodles.
"Shouldn't ya be lookin up dirty dino movies on the cortex?" Jayne asked.
"Now is not an appropriate time, the girl will be chastised if she is caught by the father figure for showing the natural curiosity," River responded as she slowly began to inch closer to the noodles. Jayne grabbed his bowl and a fork and moved over to the table. He sat down and started slurping his noodles. River followed him and sat across from Jayne. "That is not the proper way to consume cuisine of that nature."
Jayne stopped mid slurp and looked at her, he finished slurping up the noodles that were half in his mouth and swallowed them. "That so? Well, sorry I ain't no fancy core dandy like your brother, but I like slurping."
River's eyes danced with laughter as she suppressed a giggle, "Slurping is a form of respect, however your utensil is incorrect for your meal. That is what she meant."
Jayne looked down at his fork with an intense stare trying to figure out what was wrong with his fork. "Ya can't eat noodles with a spoon, they won't hold. Same with a knife."
"It isn't appropriate to eat noodles with a fork, they are designed to be eaten with these," she replies as she hands him a set of chopsticks.
"Girl, not even my mama could get me to eat with those things."
River reaches over with one hand and pulls the fork out of his grasp and replaced it with the chopsticks. "Now eat properly." She leaned forward looking at him with hopeful eyes. Jayne looked down at the chopsticks and frowned. He looks back up a River and tightened his grasp on the chopsticks. "Unless you do not possess the proper motor functions."
"I'll have you know that I'm very handy."
River raised her eyebrows, "So he has talented fingers, then he should be able to use the tool before him."
Jayne dropped his jaw along with the chopsticks he shifted in the chair. "Girl, I think you've been watching too many of those movies." River giggled in response as she leaned backwards.
Mal walked in and grabbed the noodles from Jayne; he sat down and started eating with a set of chopsticks, "River, why don't you go check up on that brother of yours. Make sure he's shiny, or if he needs any money for supplies when we land."
River stood up and looked at the noodles, and then she turned around and walked away. Mal slurped some noodles and watched her go. He leans in near Jayne and whispers, "I was looking through the cortex for some of Wash's contacts for a job, and I found a bunch of dirty movies. The kind with naked girls and dinosaurs." Jayne started chuckling, but it turned into laughter. "I know," said Mal, "It's kinda creepy. Makes a man wonder if he ever made Zoe dress up like that."
Jayne nodded in response, and hoped that Mal never figured out that it wasn't the first mate that he was thinking of dressed in a tiny strap of clothing.