A/N: I am so so sorry that it took me so long to get this chapter up. It took me forever to write this one part, and you all should know which part that is once you get to it. I spent three hours straight typing it one night and I got not even a page worth in Word. But, I'm really proud of it, so I guess it was worth it. So, thank you so much for your patience!
Thanks again for all the reviews! I'm glad most of you like the new twist this story's taking! I'm getting this really sad feeling this story is going to be over soon. I can't tell you how many more chapters, but I don't think it's that many. It's really quite sad.
Chapter Ten
Shame
A large blast erupted from the living room. Jazz and Maddie ran into the room to see a rather large hole in the wall opposite Danny as he sniffed. Still in ghost mode, he was wrapped up in blankets and the ground around him was covered in tissues.
"Sorry about the wall," Danny apologized, grabbing a tissue and blowing his nose. "As I sneezed I saw the blast power up and I didn't really know where else to aim it."
"That's alright sweetheart. It's easily fixed. How're you feeling?"
"Like I have the worst cold on the history of the planet," Danny stated dryly with a hint of congestion. He was now exhibiting all the symptoms of a full fledged human cold, with unfortunate ghostly side effects, like the recent ecto-blast through the wall. He'd seen the area underneath the couch more times than he needed and spent more time invisible than visible. Then he felt the familiar tickle in his nose. He leaned his head back to sneeze as his mother and sister took cover behind the couch. He sneezed and turned invisible, his mother and sister rising from behind their barrier, grateful it was just the invisibility again.
"What do you think would happen if I just remained invisible?" Danny's disembodied voice asked.
"Probably the same thing that would happen if you were visible," his mother stated.
"But then I wouldn't have to bother trying to turn visible anymore," Danny reasoned as he reappeared on the couch. As the day grew on he found it continually harder to use his powers when he wanted to, and sometimes he had to spend half an hour still either intangible or invisible before he could return back to normal.
"Yes, but then what if it escapes through one of your other powers instead? Maybe you should be grateful that it's just your invisibility and intangibility that continue to act up."
"I guess, but it's still really annoying. It's just getting so hard to turn back, that's all."
His mother sat down next to him and pulled his head onto her shoulder, stroking his hair. This had to be hard for him. Not only was he already embarrassed about using his powers in front of them but now he had no way to control when they were being used. He'd been through so much this past week, and now he had some strange ghost cold. He had no luck at all.
"Danny, do you remember what I used to tell you when you were sick?"
"The Many Adventures of Peter Kent the White Blood Cell? Yeah, I remember. I used to love those stories."
"I still have the pictures that you drew of him," his mother stated lovingly, her eyes glazed over as her head filled with memories of white blobs in a super-hero outfits. "I remember you went through so many different super-suits, before you found one you liked."
"Yeah. It was a cross between Superman and Spider-man and his emblem was the Superman triangle with "WBC" in the center," Danny replied as he too joined his mother's feelings of nostalgia. Jazz sat on the coffee table next to them as she too remembered her mother's stories and Danny's fascination with the superhero inside of him. She smiled as she thought about this. Maybe this was an earlier foreshadowing of the real superhero that would live inside him someday in the form of Danny Phantom.
Then, before he could pull away from his mom, Danny sneezed again, turning intangible and falling through his mother. Maddie shivered as she felt him phase through her and then back out again. She couldn't describe the feeling as unpleasant, but she was quite sure she didn't want to experience it again. She watched as he closed his eyes and concentrated hard on regaining tangibility again. When he finally became tangible his mother cuddled him again, rocking him gently from side to side.
"Remember what I told you along with those stories?" she continued. "I told you that your white blood cells were fighting a hard battle against the cold and that you just needed to give them time."
"Yeah, but do ghosts even have white blood cells?" Danny asked skeptically.
"Well, they have some form of an immune system and I think it might be slightly more advanced than that of a human. So don't worry Danny, everything's going to be all right. You just need to give it time," she comforted, not really knowing if it was. Neither she nor Jack knew even where to begin when it came to trying to find an antidote. Jack was in the process right now of trying to extract more ghost energy for him, hoping that would help whatever immune system he may have, but they really didn't know. The problem was that neither of them knew anything about ghost immune systems, which made finding a cure extremely difficult. She'd been spending the better part of the night trying to learn as much as she could, but the research was limited. A lot of it she was being forced to do on her own time, and it was taking too long.
"You don't really think that Mom," Danny stated, removing his head from her chest. "You're just saying that to make me feel better."
"Darn that Ghost Perception!" Maddie cursed. It was preventing her from feeding him little white lies.
"What Ghost Perception?" Danny asked curiously.
"It's just this rumor among ghost hunters that you've confirmed," Maddie clarified as she went into further detail about the theories behind ghost perception. "I must admit your father and I have been very intrigued since we first heard about the theory."
"So you're saying that I can pick up on other people's feelings?" Danny asked.
"It appears so."
"So you don't think there's a chance."
"Now Danny, that's not what I meant. I'm just feeling a little hopeless right now, that's all."
"You're feeling hopeless?" he asked sarcastically. "I'm the one that keeps falling through the couch and blasting holes in the wall!"
"Danny, I don't think that's what she means," Jazz stated, trying to keep the peace. "I think we're all feeling a little hopeless, but that doesn't mean there still isn't hope. Just because we can't see a cure right now doesn't mean we won't see it in a few hours time. Mom's right, we just need to give it time."
"Let's hope I have time."
"You can't think like that dear," Maddie comforted. "We will get through this, alright?"
Danny nodded and rested his congested head on his mother's shoulder.
Jazz rose and decided to see if her Dad needed any help in the basement, sensing that a much needed talk between a mother and her ghostly son was coming.
"Mom, I'm glad you're here with me, helping me."
"Well why wouldn't I be here?"
"Well…it's just…I just can't help thinking that you'll start…shunning me because of my powers, especially now that I have no control over them."
"Daniel Fenton, don't even think something like that, do you hear me?" she asked as she pulled him away from her shoulder, her violet eyes meeting his glowing green ones.
Danny's eyes dropped down to his lap, not wanting to meet those of his mother. "I'm sorry, I just…I know you said you'd accept me, but I still feel weird, using my powers or being in ghost form around you and Dad, and I don't know why. I use them just fine around Sam and Tucker, but not around you, and I think it has something to do with my fear that you won't accept me. I kept thinking that as long as I didn't use my powers or do anything that would remind you that I'm a ghost, everything would be all right and back to normal. And now, because of that stupid weapon, everything is just a constant reminder that I'm a ghost and I just can't shake the fear that you'll change your mind after seeing how much of a ghost I really am." Danny started crying, his glowing tears falling smoothly down his face. "It's like I feel ashamed of being a ghost around you, and I know I shouldn't feel this way and I'm sorry, but I just can't help it." He wiped the tears from his face and looked down at the glowing liquid. "I mean, I can't even cry without reminding everyone of what I am!"
Maddie wiped the tears lovingly from his eyes and held her tear covered finger in front of his face. "You see these? They're just tears, nothing more. So what if they glow? That doesn't matter. It doesn't matter to me, to your father, to Jazz, or to Tucker and Sam, and it certainly shouldn't matter to you."
"But they show that…"
"Yes, they show that you're a ghost, but that's what you are, isn't it? And there is no reason for you to feel ashamed about being who you are, whether it's human or ghost or a combination of the two. Your father and I will love you no matter what, and we stand by that, no matter what ghostly side-effects you have. Yes, they may remind us that you're a ghost, but do you want to know what they really remind me of? They remind me of how special my son is, of how courageous and brave he is, of how he risks his life, or what's left of it, to protect this town, of how he never gives up and fights for what's right, of how proud I am of him for everything he does and has become, and most importantly, of how much I love him, ghost and all."
Danny buried his head into his mother's shoulder and started crying as his mother warmly embraced his cold body. She knew that he was feeling awkward about using his powers in front of them, but she never realized that he felt ashamed about using them, and not only that, but about being a ghost.
She thought of what it would be like, to be in Danny's position, to be a ghost. She thought of all the little things that would remind her that she was indeed no longer human or alive. She thought about eating, and how she wouldn't necessarily need to do it, about getting cut and bleeding green ectoplasm along with the blood, about triggering all the ghost inventions, about sleep and how even that was unnecessary. The more she thought, the more she realized that Danny was constantly being reminded that he was a ghost, and that didn't even count all the times that people would bring up the subject of ghosts or when a ghost attacked.
"Sweetheart, I know that being a ghost probably isn't the easiest thing. I'm sure that you're reminded about being a ghost almost every second of the day, and that can't be easy, but I want you to know that it doesn't matter to your father and me. We don't care. We don't care that you're a ghost boy, because you're our ghost boy, and we love you. You can't imagine how proud of you we are for being a ghost and for doing everything you do. You risk your life everyday, and we can't tell you how warm that makes us feel.
"It's no different from those superheroes you used to idolize. They weren't completely human and I'm sure they were reminded about it constantly, but they never gave up and their friends and family were still there for them. Clark Kent never felt embarrassed or ashamed about being an alien, and you shouldn't about being a ghost. And if it's something that your father and I are doing…"
"No Mom, this has nothing to do with you or Dad. It's just me. You guys have been great, and I couldn't have asked for you to be more accepting or loving. I don't think I've ever felt as loved as I have for this past week, which is why I feel so bad about all this, but I just can't help it."
"Don't worry about it sweetheart. I know this isn't something that can be fixed quickly, but I just want you to know that there's no reason for you to feel ashamed and that we're always here for you and that no matter what we will always be proud of you and love you with every ounce of our heart."
Danny lifted his head up and gazed into her eyes. "I know," he replied as he buried his head against her shoulder again.
About a half hour and eleven sneezes later, Maddie left Danny's side, explaining to him that she needed to go downstairs and help Jack with finding a cure. Danny understood, but that didn't mean that he wanted his mom to go. He was feeling really comfortable, leaning against her shoulder while she embraced him. In that half hour he didn't feel ashamed to be a ghost because he knew that everything was okay. He knew that it would still be that way and that they still didn't care, but it was just so clear while relishing in his mother's embrace. Now the haze of doubt was flooding his thoughts and feelings again, but he noticed with a glimmer of hope that it wasn't as hazy as before. His mother was right; it was just going to take time. Give it a few months or so and he'd feel perfectly at ease with using his ghost powers in front of them, just like he was with Tucker and Sam.
Danny decided to sleep on the couch since the living room already had a nice burned dent in the wall from all his uncontrolled ecto-blasts. His parents had stayed up late into the night trying to find a cure before Danny got up and made his way downstairs, demanding that they go to bed. After much arguing they finally decided to obey and proceeded upstairs, falling asleep immediately as their bodies hit the bed. Danny headed to the couch and drifted into an uneasy sleep, dreaming of glowing white blood cells with ghost powers wearing his jumpsuit fighting in a war against specks of powder dressed like Plasmius
Danny was shook out of his slumber by a knock on the door and immediately sat up and looked around the room, paranoid. He was sitting in the front room, and stuck as a ghost. If anyone came in, well, he didn't think it would necessarily be the best thing for someone to see the infamous Danny Phantom in the Fenton's living room with a cold.
Jazz came running downstairs and looked at Danny.
"Go invisible!" she demanded in a whisper.
Danny concentrated, but nothing happened. "I can't!" he whispered back.
"Intangible?"
He concentrated, but still nothing. "Nope."
"Alright, then just hide under the covers. I'll make sure they don't come into the house."
Danny ducked under the covers, praying that he wouldn't sneeze and release an ecto-blast as he heard Jazz open the door.
"Argh, do you two realize how much you scared us?" he heard Jazz yell from the door.
"Why would we scare you?" Sam asked.
Danny pulled his head out from the covers with a sigh of relief. It was just Sam and Tucker.
"Yeah, we come over almost…what happened?" Tucker asked as he noticed the new décor of the living room. There were burn marks all over the walls and a particularly large one across from the couch where Danny was sitting. The floor was covered in tissues full of glowing green liquid. They looked at the couch and noticed Danny, in his ghost form, wrapped in at least five blankets, his nose raw and his eyes dull.
"Doing some redecorating?" Tucker asked with a smile. Danny and Jazz just glared at him.
"Tucker, don't be stupid. Danny, are you okay?" Sam asked concerned.
"Oh yeah," he replied sarcastically in a very nasally tone. "Yeah, I'm totally fine."
"What happened? Shouldn't you be getting ready for school?"
Then Danny remembered, he was supposed to go to school today for the first time in a week.
"Well, let's just say that I'm in no disposition to go to school. Skulker found a new way to make my life more miserable," he explained as he felt the tingling in his nose. He automatically lifted both his arms, extending one out to the wall and the other up to his mouth. He sneezed and an ecto-blast emanated from his hand at the large spot in the wall.
"Skulker had this biological weapon that released this powder into Danny's system. Now he's stuck in ghost mode and has some form of a ghost cold," Jazz explained as Danny blew his nose into a tissue. Tucker and Sam exchanged worried looks.
"Which pretty much means that I have absolutely no control over my powers, my nose is running like crazy, and I have a fever. Yippee."
"So, now you're going to miss another week of school?" Tucker asked.
"Well I can't very well go to school like this, especially if I keep sneezing ecto-blasts!"
"What I think Tucker was trying to say was: do we need to think up an excuse for why you're still not at school even though you said you would be?"
"Yeah."
"Alright it's not that hard. We'll just say that over the night Danny caught the flu and has it really bad," Jazz explained. "It shouldn't be too hard to believe, since his immune system would be weak after the electrocution."
"Wow, you just can't get a break," Tucker remarked.
"Tell me about it." He felt a sneeze coming on and automatically raised both his arms like before. This time he merely turned intangible and fell through the couch.
"Just like old times, huh?" Sam asked with a smile.
"Unfortunately. I've seen the underside of this couch more times than I can ever wish," Danny lamented as he regained tangibility on the couch.
"So how much spare change have you found under the couch?" Tucker asked.
Danny laughed, for the first time in a while. "Three dollars and seventy one cents."
"Wow. That's impressive. What else…?"
"Tucker, this isn't the time! Danny's sick!" Sam reprimanded.
"I was just trying to cheer him up."
"Listen, this isn't something for the two of you to worry about. Mom and Dad have been spending every waking second in that lab trying to find a cure, so don't worry. Danny's in no immediate danger."
"Are you sure?" Sam asked.
"Positive. They'll find the cure and then everything will be back to normal, well, as normal as it can be around here."
"But how can you be sure?"
Danny smiled at Sam's protective nature. She obviously didn't want to leave for school unless she was certain that he would be there when she got back. As Sam continued to pester Jazz amidst her many reassurances, Danny turned towards the wall and looked at the large blast in the wall. He was certainly doing some damage to it. He figured it would only be able to take a few more blasts before he burnt a hole through it.
Danny felt yet another sneeze coming. Speaking of blasts he thought as he raised his arm towards the wall. He sneezed, but instead of the expected ecto-blast, his sneeze melded into a Ghostly Wail. He tried to close his mouth, tried to stop the scream, but he couldn't. Finally the wail ceased and Danny shut his eyes and fell over on the couch, knocked out from the energy the wail used.
A/N: So, I hope you liked the chapter! It wasanother nice psychological one, which are hard to write, but fun once their done.
