Slayers: Final
Chapter Ten
The Machinations of Cid and the Demon that broke Wind
We arrived at my humble abode shortly after that freaky incident with that Zeldegas (is that his name?)character. I don't know who these people are, or where the nine hells they came from, but man! Do they have baggage! One guy is a weird rock man that thinks he's a demon, one of the girls is either frighteningly depressing or unconscious and the other thinks that she HAS to help everyone, all the time, at the SAME time!
But, at least there is some normalcy in this freak show. Her beauty is like none I have seen before, not even crown Princess Miriel of the Elvaan can match her radiance (sorry toots! You know I love ya!). But beyond her angelic physique lies a mind of as great a caliber as my own! Her sheer genius in the arts mirrors and compliments my own gift in engineering perfectly! I haven't been this excited this the time I discovered the Clitorians of the planet Labius Minor! (Oh you laugh, but I know better! And so will she. . .hehehe.) Oh, wondrous Naga! Could you finally be the one I have been looking for!
"Oh, Ciddy-boy! Are you not going to show me around?", the captor of my heart chimed.
"Yes dear!"
Okay, that's enough terrible romantic fiction for now! I have to show in my guest!
I woke up not long after we had landed, a little sore but no worse for wear. Naga was calling us out, and I assume we are at Cid's place now. Really for lack of anything better to do I obliged Naga and made my way out of the ship. Maybe taking in something new would keep me from thinking about. . .other things.
What I saw next as I descended from the Invincible's ramp could only be described as. . .a junkyard.
Seriously there was no rhyme or reason to the garbage, broken machinery and rusted baubles strewn about the place. But in the center of the seemingly tornado blown messed was a well kept log and metal cabin. It was slightly oblong and looked as if it might tip over, but, as I said, it was clean and junk free.
At least that is what I thought until I went inside.
In Casa de Cid, as the Elf dubbed it, was hardly any different from the inside of his flying ship. Innuendo as far as the eye could see, which wasn't far as the house was only roughly the size of four or five rooms your average Inn. The only real difference between the ship and the house was that fully half of the dwelling was a dedicated workshop, but even that had various paintings with lewd images and devises of dubious intentions. If the elf wasn't so useful I'd probably ran far, far away by now. But, I'll guess I'll have to put up with his. . .eccentricities for now.
And besides, Naga seems to like him. I guess people with diseased brains to attract to each other.
Stopping my musing, I started to pay attention to Cid's tour along with Amelia, a very miserable looking Zel and Naga who was practically molesting Cid by the placement of her hands. . .ew. No surprise Cid doesn't seem to mind.
". . .as you can see here, many of my inventions may one day revolutionize the world!" he was getting more and more animated either because he was genuinely excited about his work, or because of Naga's progressively lowering hands. "Ever get tired of the drudgery and hardship of using your own two feet to walk?"
"No," was the unanimous response.
"Well here is a device that walks FOR you!" he continued unfazed.
He then proceeded to climb into his work, which looked like the lower half of a wooden puppet with a seat were the waist should start. Most curious about it were the long poles extruding from the calves of the machine extending to up past the seat on either side.
Once seated he grasped the poles and began to pump his arms vigorously, making the legs slowly part surly move along in a plodding pace. It looked rather difficult, actually.
After a few minutes of watching Cid move an amazing 5 feet since he started I calmly walked over to the supposed genius. I shot him a cute wink and beckoned him to lean down lower as if I was going to tell him something.
I didn't say anything personally but my fist said his "invention" was rather silly and needed more work. I caught Amelia smiling at my opinion of Cid's handiwork.
"Yes? Amelia?" I asked.
"Oh, it's nothing Miss Lina. It's just nice to have you back." She then turned to the ever despondent Zel and I thought I caught a glimmer of hope in her eyes. Zel didn't respond in any way what so ever. What happened between those two, anyways?
"Um, yeah. Ok, your welcome?" I haven't been acting THAT weird have I? Wait, don't answer that. It may be true that I have been a little depressed as of late (who wouldn't be if your best friend just died), but that is no reason for me to completely change is it? Sure it still hurts terribly when I think of Gourry, it will for a long time I think. But I'm not about to let it rule my thoughts or my actions! Gourry wouldn't want me to be like that and quite frankly, neither do I.
"On to my next invention," jibber-jabbered Cid while rubbing his new cranial protrusion. "This here is a torch that uses the power of the sun to create light!" I did not know where to begin to explain how silly that sounded to me.
Cid produced a small cylinder with once closed end and one glass end. On the tube's surface were strange, slightly reflective black squares dotting it. He then clicked a button on the tube and low and behold, a light sprung forth.
"Hey, that is pretty impressive." It was! It thought it'd be worthless like the walking machine, but this could actually prove to be useful as we haven't come across anything resembling an Illumination spell yet.
"Way to go, Ciddy-boy!" Naga said, while increasingly proving that she is what she dresses like, much to Cid's enjoyment no doubt.
"Not bad, huh?" beamed Cid, while silently encouraging Naga much to our, especially Amelia, mounting disgust.
Then the light went out.
"Well that was stupid," The up till now quiet Zelgadis stated.
"Mr. Zelgadis! That wasn't very nice of you!" Amelia said.
"Yeah, well I'm not feeling particularly nice right now," replied Zel.
"Well, that doesn't mean you should make other people feel bad! Look where it's gotten you so far!"
"What does it matter to you!"
"I'm worried about you!"
"Yeah well. . ."
It went on like this for a few more minutes with Zel and Amelia playing verbal badminton. One lobbed one vocal bombshell while the other retaliated with another. It was getting pretty nasty, I mean brutal. Zel called Amelia a head case that should visit a shrink herself before trying to solve other people's problems and Amelia called Zel a pompous jerk with a head like a rock (I wonder if she did that on purpose? Nah.) It all came to a head when a new voice interrupted us.
"The Beast Master was defeated by this!" We all turned and looked about for the owner of the said voice. It was pretty, and definently belonged to a woman.
Or something resembling a woman. . .
The next thing I knew was being knocked to the ground by something powerful. And I don't mean inside Cid's house ground. Everyone was knocked clean out of the cabin and strewn about like the junk populating the yard.
I got up as quickly as I could for fear of another attack. But my fears were put on hold as I saw that our assailant (who was a woman by the way) sitting patiently on the bow of a half completed ship waiting for us to get up and collect ourselves. She was very shapely, enough to give Naga a run for her money, with voluminous blonde hair that seemed to be floating as if caught in a gentle breeze, despite their being no wind whatsoever. Almost in spite of her beauty the woman's face was devoid of any emotion or expression of any kind.
Why that arrogant bitch!
"What is she another demon?" asked a slightly freaked out Cid.
"I dunno, not many people could blow away a house like that but it could be an attack spell," I replied uncertainly. Everyone began to group together, which gave me a very bad feeling.
"Too easy," the demon stated, still with out expression.
A small tornado appeared before us, tugging our clothes and whipping our hair. As uncomfortable as that was, the vortex wasn't powerful enough to lift us up off the ground, what could she be planning with this semi-impressive display?
The it hit me. A steel pipe that is, dislodge from its previous resting place by the wind. I dropped instantly for the pipe knocked my breathe out. And it hurt, really, really bad. It's enough to piss off a girl. The I got caught on the head! Which sent me sprawling a few yards away. I covered my wound my left hand and it came away with some blood and one of my birthmark moles!
Damn it.
I looked around and saw no one save Zel fairing no better. Amelia seemed to be chased by a lawn chair and judging by her screaming, a ferocious lawn chair. Naga was looking ridiculous holding up Cid like a shield to deflect debris, and Cid seemed to think the whole thing was ridiculous to by his expression. Not Zelly-boy though. He stood resolutely in the path of the junk deluge. The metal and wood hail bouncing off of his stone skin with 'chink' and 'clunk' noises.
The demon, halted the storm as she soon realized she wasn't going to kill us so easily. That or she got bored, because she could have killed most of us like that, as we weren't moving any where with that wind.
"This is no fun," the demon tut-tuted, which looked pretty wooden without any emotion still. "Attack me. This would be a bore and a chore if you guys didn't make things interesting."
Happy to oblige ya, missy!
"Fira!" I launched my spell and twin streams of flame helixed around the demon, engulfing her in the caustic gas.
"Hahaha!" I boasted. So much for the blustery boob!
"Hahaha!" a familiar voice boasted! Hey, I thought I saw a smile there!
Whoops. Laughed too soon. . ..
The wind began to pick up again and the fire smothering the demon was smothered by her strong gusts.
"That's it? Surely the ones who defeated a Demon Lord can do better! Eyaah!" She launched a concussive blast of wind and it was headed straight for me! No time to get out of the way!
"Reflect!" Amelia cried out from across the junkyard.
The spell bounced off from an invisible force just infront of me and rebounded back towards the demon. Which of course did nothing to her.
"This is getting old, I Valvalis will finish you off with but one 'blow'!" Again with the icky demon humor.
"Just like Mistress Kari destroyed that blonde fool!"
WHAT!
I cast the reflect spell just in time and Lina was saved! While it is nice that the right spells come up at the right time, I wish that I could actually know the spells before hand instead of getting jerked around like this.
The demon started to boast, by the tone of her voice, and Lina is. . .what? She isn't doing anything. She can't just be doing nothing! Not with her life in danger like this! Oh great the demon is casting some type of spell! Shoot! I don't have any power left in me! I spent it all trying to protect everyone from that wind storm.
I looked around to see if anyone else could help Lina in time. Gracia and Cid look like they are trying to untangle themselves, not good! Gracia is always good for a distraction! Ack! Now I'm started to think like Miss Lina, again!
Who else? Mr. Zelgadis! Just a few dozens yards away from Lina, and he is preparing an attack! But the demon looks almost done too! Ah, screw it! I know it probably won't work, but I'll try it anyways!
I reached for my bow and notched an arrow, pulled and took aim. Then an idea came to mind. Concentrating on the arrow I prayed to the remaining Crystals and holy energy charged into it until it glowed a pure white. I let loose and it struck the demon just below her right shoulder, making her misfire her spell into the air, and it was a big one!
Just then, Mr. Zelgadis charged into attack mode as well, his fists ablaze with power. He launched into the demon with untold fury, landing a few dozen punches and lighting fast kicks before the demon probably knew she was being assailed by him.
Shoot! I wish my martial arts skills were that good! Finally his attack was over and he slumped away from what I thought was exhaustion. I ran over to him in a hurry, intent on getting him away from the demon before she fully recovered. As I got closer and could get a better look at him, my heart nearly stopped and my legs failed me. Mr. Zelgadis was crisscrossed with thin lines of crimson.
Blood.
"Not too shabby, you just made number one on my list of people to kill!" She then zoomed over to Zelgadis and began to repay his attack with an miasmatic blast!
Oh, crap! Miasmatic blasts short out a living creatures bioelectric system! I don't know if Zelgadis's stone skin can defend against something like that!
The attack buzzed its way to my fallen friend with unerring accuracy and hit with a weird wuzzing sound. But, Zelgadis was no longer there! He had simply vanished! I looked around, but I couldn't find him anywhere.
Thwip!
Mr. Zelgadis suddenly appeared behind the demon woman and attacked!
"Wuuaahg!" the demon groaned. But she wasn't defeated yet, unfortunately. She pushed through the pain and reached around and grabbed Zelgadis by his wings.
"Your hands may be free, but you won't be zipping around on me like that again! Let's see how you look without these pretty wings!" She began to pull and I heard stone cracking and Mr. Zelgadis cried out in pain!
"No." Miss Lina! She glowed like gold once again, just like when Gourry died, but something was different. Gone was the unthinking rage, her face showed it was replaced with grim determination. "No, I won't let you hell spawned freaks take anyone else important away from me! Eyaaah!" A flash of black streaked from Lina to the demon and the demon's arm fell away spewing black miasma. The demon also dropped Zelgadis who slunk away as fast as he could. I cast a haste spell, and he relatively quickly made it back to my side. I cast a small cure spell on him as I could feel some of my powers coming back.
"Bitch! How dare you! Do you have any idea who you are messing with!" screeched the incensed demon. "I could destroy every single one of you and not even Bardradigdo could discover all the pieces!"
"Maybe," Lina calmly replied, "But I am more powerful than you." With that hundreds of tiny black needles shot forth from Lina's outstretched hands and they pierced the demon dozens at a time! There was nothing the devil could do, she writhed in obvious agony as the needles went in and through her. Eventually, there was nothing left but black miasma, slowly dissipating into the clear sky.
Lina, then fell down to her knees, breathing hard, as if she just ran a marathon.
"Miss Lina! Are you okay?" She looked at me, smiled and winked. I noticed that the left side of her fore head had a nasty gash that took away one of her moles. I quickly chanted a light healing spell and the wound closed up, but the mole wouldn't regenerate.
"What did you do?" Zelgadis asked, "I hit her with all my power, but I could barely scratch her. Yet you completely obliterated her with ease!"
"You call that easy?" Lina, said between breaths "That took almost everything I had and more! Plus, I don't think I would have been able to do that if the bitch hadn't. . ." she faltered just a little bit, "hadn't insulted Gourry. That, along with Zel almost getting himself killed is what gave me the anger and determination I needed to do that just now."
"Still, that was very impressive. Makes me wonder if any of us will have any use." Zelgadis replied.
"Hahaha, yeah, my power is getting pretty ridiculous, isn't it? But I don't think I'll be of much help to you guys anytime soon. I'm pretty wiped."
"As much after you defeated Shabranigdo?"
"No, but pretty close. The freak we just fought, wasn't anywhere near as powerful as good ol' Ruby Eyes, but she was still a pain in the ass." she looked around for a brief moment. "Hey? Where is Naga and Cid?"
Crap! How could I forget about my only sister! What if she's hurt or something! We immediately set out to find them. I went on ahead as Lina used Zelgadis for support so they weren't covering as much ground as I would've liked, but it really couldn't be helped.
I was scaling to the top of a junk pile when I heard it. I weak whisper that sounding like 'Cid'. Groaning soon followed. I traced the sound and it soon became louder, it was Cid and Gracia's voices! They really sounded like they were hurt bad! I rounded the next junk pile to where I believed them to be and saw what no one should ever see under any circumstances.
"EEEEEK!"
"Amelia!" Zel started and began to head in the shriek's origin with myself in tow. We were both pretty weak, but we made it just in time to join in with a horrified Amelia watch a half naked Cid and Naga untangle themselves from each other.
I think I'm going to be sick. . .
"Ridiculous," Zel derisively snorted.
"Uh, wha, huh?" Amelia articulated
Cid and Naga for there part, stumbled around several excuses and explanations all at once. It was pretty funny watching them ad lib and contradict each other but I had to put a stop to it.
"Oh no, you don't have to explain why you two decided to fuck instead of help us. I understand perfectly."
"You do! Thanks a bu-!" My fist dropped him to the floor faster than a prone and naked Naga EVER could.
"YOU IDIOTS! We REALLY could have used YOUR help back there!"
"Don't act so jealous, Lina! I knew that demon wasn't going to be much of a challenge, even for you," Naga explained sans logic.
If you die coupling with that elf Naga, I'm going to laugh!
"Regardless of what you thought the situation was Gracia and Cid, what you two did was sick, on top of being the wrong place at the wrong time!" Always a gift for the understatement, that Amelia.
"Oh, come on! Things turned out ok, didn't they?" Cid complained while massaging yet another new bump. Maybe I should start calling him Lumpy?
"I guess," I replied, "But that is no excuse! We should all work as a team, especially since not all of us can single handedly take out a demon!" I had to throw that in there. "So leave the hanky-panky in the bedroom, freaks!"
"So now what?" Zel said, obviously a little tired of our own personal porn star's antics.
"I say we should salvage what we can from Cid's place and take off. Maybe we can find the next temple if we do some aerial reconnaissance." I wasn't sure if that would really work, but we don't really have anything else to go on right now. Maybe Xellos will show up again sometime soon with more info. Sheesh! I'm actually hoping for Xellos to show up! What the hell is happening to me?
Author's notes
Hey! Remember me? I used to do regular updates! But then I got burned out on this story and had to try something new. Go check it out! It's called Slayers: Knightfall. I am sorry that I took so long in updating this though. Soon we'll get things back into full swing, with a new chapter every three or four weeks. What will happen next to our weary adventurers! Will Zel finally see his plan into fruition? Will Amelia do the impossible and solve all the world's problems? Will Cid and Naga get a room? And will Lina fully come to terms with the death of her beloved swordsman? Stay tuned next time for Slayers: Final!
Tom the Might, out!