Greetings everyone, so I finally uploaded chapter 4. Yes, I know it took longer than the upload of the previous chapters but I couldn't write because of the exams. I want to thank everyone who favored, followed, or left the comment in the reviews. It definitely motivates me to continue. I also posted answers at the end to the questions from the reviews, so to those who asked about something or posted comments, do not worry I read them and I'm happy for them. :)

Chapter 4: The Regrets of the Past

They were on the road to Castle Black for nine days already. Lyanna remained silent all the way except for a few words. She mostly spoke only with Zyraxes though it was through their mind connection and that Benjen naturally couldn't hear.

"You know that if you are not going to talk about your bad feelings, they are not going to go away." He began the conversation by the fire.

Lyanna was pulled off her thoughts. "I am sorry, what?"

Benjen shook his head. "I said, if you are not feeling alright, you should at least try to talk about it."

"Is that so? And what should I talk about? How am I confused, hurt, distressed or how am I outright afraid?" Benjen looked at her and realized there was a slight hint of fear and distress in her face but otherwise she also looked peaceful sitting and looking at the fire with her dragon who was sleeping in her lap.

"From my experience, talking usually helps when it comes to those emotions, so talk with me."

Lyanna sighted and looked at Benjen. "Well, firstly I don't really know who I am anymore, uncle."

"And who do you think you are? I see the same girl I saw yesterday."

"I always believed I was no one, just a bastard girl with no prospects and care in this world. I wanted to leave Westeros and see the world, just escape any responsibilities of being Ned Stark's bastard and avoid the constant whispering and rumors about my origin." Lyanna paused and took a deep breath before she continued "Do you know what the biggest irony is? Despite all of those desires to just leave Winterfell and never return, there was one thing I always wished for, that one day my fat.. uncle would ask the king for a favor and I wouldn't be a bastard anymore. Yet now when I know I am not a bastard, or the Stark but a Targaryen Princess, I am not sure if this is really what I wanted and it confuses me."

"What we wish and what we want are often two very different things, Lyanna, and we don't always get what we want or even what we wish."

Lyanna frowned. "Yes, I gathered that, but who am I now? I mean…a princess of the House of Targaryen? All I ever knew was, how to be a bastard of Winterfell."

"Does your name and status define who you are as a person, Lyanna? Will you turn suddenly into someone else now that you know you are a Targaryen?"

Lyanna paused for a few moments as she considered Benjen's words. "Probably not."

"That is my point, you will still be the same girl, with the temper and stubborn as hell only now with the knowledge of her royal origin." Benjen winked at her with a grin.

Lyanna gave him a puzzled look. "I am not stubborn and certainly not as hell." Benjen just raised his eyebrow. "Fine, I am stubborn but not as hell."

Benjen chuckled. "Alright have it your way, in any case you also have courage, sense of justice, honor and compassion in a healthy amount. In short, you're a good person and you always will be."

"If you say so."

Benjen caught her skeptical tone. "You doubt my words?"

"Well I have read many books about Targaryen…..my family¨, and there were many of them who could be considered cruel, mad or outright lunatics. It was King Jaeherys the Old who said: 'The madness and greatness are two sides of the same coin and everytime Targaryen is born the gods flip the coin and the world holds its breath.' So, what if my coin fell on the bad side?"

Benjen was silent for a moment then he shook his head with a slight smirk. When he saw stunned Lyanna he calmed and tried to explain his reaction. "I am sorry but I didn't know you actually believe that nonsense about madness and coins."

"Excuse me? There were bad and great Targaryens in the past. Clearly there must be some truth in that old saying."

Benjen shook his head. "Or they were just proud, spoiled and stupid cunts who thought their name gave right to do whatever they wanted and didn't know any better. They could also go through some very bad circumstances which undermined their mental health, like the last Targaryen king Aerys the Second."

Lyanna considered what her uncle just told her and tried to remember what she had read in the books and heard from Maester Luwin about The Mad King. "King Aerys was a good ruler at first, however then he began to be more and more unstable during his reign so his madness didn't happened overnight and there could be something causing his mental health to deteriorate over the years." Lyanna paused "Hmm, Aerys had many children who died stillborn or shortly after birth with his sister-wife. That probably had some negative impact on his mind because if I remember it correctly, his mental state got little better after birth of Prince Viseris at least for a while, until his imprisoment and torture during the defiance of Duskendale after which he began to burn people alive. I would say there is a chance there were even more factors adding to his madness but such things are not recorded in the history books or records of the maesters."

Benjen nodded, impressed that she knew all of this. "You know the history well Lyanna, at least the history of what is written. So my point is there is no predetermined madness in your family, any man could break after what Aerys endured, it's not some god-given curse."

"Hmm…..I guess you are right and I think you put things into a different perspective for me."

Benjen smiled. "I am glad to be of service." Then his face darkened and he asked. "Do you hate him now?"

"Who?"

"Your father and by your father I mean my brother, the man who raised you."

Lyanna looked above to the sky then she turned to Benjen with a sad expression. "You know I told him that once just recently, but I didn't really mean it, although after I learned he lied to me all this time….I am not sure how I feel about him."

"Robert Baratheon would have killed you if he knew who you really are and Ned knew it."

Lyanna frowned. "Would he ever tell me? About my real parents?"

Benjen remembered his brother's words in the godswood. "I would rather not tell her ever that she is Lyanna and Rhaegar's daughter." Then the words he said after he tried to convince him to tell her. " I will think about it but can't promise anything." Benjen wasn't sure how Lyanna would react to the fact that Ned wasn't about to tell her the truth. "I tried to convince him to tell you the truth and he promised to think about it."

"Of course he did…well it doesn't matter anymore does it?"

Benjen sighed. "Lyanna, you are not his daughter, yes, however he still loves you like you were one."

Lyanna remained silent and her face didn't give anything away. "I don't want to talk about him…."

Benjen wasn't about to give up and came to sit next to her. "Lyanna, look at me."

She did and there were tears in her eyes. "Why didn't he tell me the truth when I was old enough to understand? I mean at least to me and only to me and no one else? I had a right to know who my real parents were."

"He thought it was too dangerous, he wanted to protect you…."

"No, I had a right to know." She picked up Zyraxes and got up. "Now, I don't know about you but I am quite weary so I am going to get some sleep, wake me up when it's my turn to watch."

Benjen nodded. "Just don't get embittered by the recent events. The world has seen enough bitterness already and I fear it will yet see more, so you don't need to add more into it."

Lyanna's face softened. "I will remember that uncle." And with that she was about to walk away from the fire however she stopped and looked at Benjen one more time. "I understand I would be dead if not for him and his lie. I know he saved my life and sacrificed his honor for my mother and me and he truly cared for me as if I was his own daughter. I can't deny that and I am grateful for it but I still think he should have told me when I was old enough to understand it and to keep the truth hidden alongside him."With that she left for her sleeping spot.

When they arrived near the Wall, Lyanna was impressed by it. She never saw a building of such size. "Now I understand why people say it was built by the giants."

Benjen just shrugged. "Well, people say many things about the Wall, Lyanna. The rumor it was built by the giants is one of the more flattering ones, which are not many these days." Lyanna looked at Benjen with a questioning look. "You see, The Night's Watch is not what it once was and as they say in the south, the wall is just a prison, where they send outcasts, rapers, thieves and other criminals to rot when they didn't have a courage to execute them." They both urged their horses to move towards Castle Black at a slow pace.

Lyanna nodded. "I see, I admit I heard about the decline of The Night's Watch during my fostering in Barrowtown from Lady Dustin, however I was skeptical about it, since Lord Stark always insisted it was an honorable charge to serve in The Night's Watch."

Benjen made a sad smile. "Of course he would say such a thing, he never even saw The Wall himself and I think he doesn't want to accept the fact the Night's Watch is not what it once was and that there is a little honor in serving in it."

As Lyanna heard his words a sudden question came to her mind. "Why did you even join The Night's Watch then?"

"I felt the guilt, the shame and the regret after Robert's rebellion ended."

"For what? You didn't do anything."

"Yes, that is precisely what I did, nothing." Lyanna was taken back by his sudden, angry tone, yet she could feel it wasn't aimed at her. "I am sorry, sometimes my emotions get the better of me when talking about this topic, even after all these years. But to answer your question, I knew about Rhaegar and Lyanna, I was the one who witnessed their first meeting at the tourney of Harrenhal after he found out she was the Knight of the Laughing Tree."

Lyanna couldn't believe it. She heard about this knight but that it was Lyanna Stark, her mother, that she didn't expect. "My mother was the Knight of the Laughing Tree?"

"Yes, she was, you see, your mother had a great sense of justice. While in Harrenhal, she came across three squares of house Frey bullying Howland Reed. She drove them off and took Howland to our tent. Later during the feast she recognized those squares and told me and my brothers about what happened and who they were. After hearing it, I urged Howland to get vengeance upon them by competing in the tourney. I even offered to find a horse and armor for him but he was indecisive, since he was crannogman and had no experience with the horse or lance and feared he would only make a fool of himself."

"And I guess he didn't compete because of it, given the fact that my mother was the Knight of the Laughing Tree, right?"

Benjen nodded. "Indeed, your mother just couldn't let the injustice committed upon Howland go unpunished. So she requested I get that armor and a horse but for her and the next day she entered the lists as a mystery knight."

Lyanna couldn't help but feel proud of her mother. "Did she get what she wanted?"

"Yes, she has beaten all three knights and when they came to ransom back their armor she ordered them to punish their squares and teach them about honor for it. The problem was that after she did that and won those jousts, she also began to attract unwanted attention from many knights including Robert Baratheon, who wanted to unmask her, plus there was also the King Aerys himself who wasn't exactly thrilled by the idea of the mystery knight. And as we later learned from your father, he even commanded his knights to defeat the Knight of the Laughing Tree in order to unmask the one he thought was his enemy. So when the next day came, the Knight of the Laughing Tree was nowhere to be found."

"But you said Prince Rhaegar found out the Knight of the Laughing Tree was my mother, so I gather he tracked you down?"

"I was just getting to that…Well as it turned out, the King ordered Prince Rhaegar and Ser Arthur Dayne to find the mystery knight. And the Prince found us just when we were getting rid of the armor and shield."

Lyanna became more and more curious. "So this was when my parents saw each other for the first time?"

"Yes, we expected to be apprehended and brought back but he just smiled, sat down and seemed to be amazed that the knight was actually your mother. Then he asked why she did it and well, he got even more impressed by your mother probably. Then he began to talk with Lyanna about various things at which point I figured it would be best for me to leave, so I took the armor and left the two of them alone. Just a few meters away, I met Ser Arthur who told me to leave the shield behind as a proof for the king."

"So, you just left my mother there alone with the Prince you both barely knew?"

"Well, I thought that if he wanted to harm us he would've done it already and I also noticed a spark of affection between them. I just didn't want to interrupt, also there was the armor I needed to get rid off."

Lyanna chuckled. "I would say that getting rid of that armor was a valid enough reason to leave them alone. What happened next?"

"That is a story widely known, your father won the tourney and crowned you mother as the queen of love and beauty. Many later said it was out of lust but I think he did it because he believed she deserved it for what she had done and simply crowned her out of respect."

Lyanna knew how the lords reacted to it. "And it has become one of the causes for the later war because my father Prince Rhaegar chose my mother and she chose him rather than Robert Baratheon. However, if I am not mistaken, the main event which started the war was the killing of Rickard Stark and Brandon Stark, who just reacted to my father's rumored action."

"Yes, which comes back to my guilt and shame."

"How so?"

"I knew about them, yet I never said anything to my father or my brother Brandon. If I did tell them the truth, they would never have gone to King's Landing. Instead, they would try to find Lyanna and Rhaegar. They would still be alive as well as thousands of innocent people who would be spared. Don't get me wrong, I think the war against the Mad King would still happen but I bet less people would be dead now. However, most importantly you would grow up knowing your mother's love, if only I would say something…"

Lyanna looked away for a few seconds as she didn't know what to say then she looked at Benjen. "Do not blame yourself uncle, I think the mistakes were done on all sides not just yours, you shouldn't have joined the Night's Watch because of it, you are a good man."

"It doesn't matter, I joined because I felt it was the only thing I could do after all that happened. It was my choice to serve with the disgraced knights and criminals, which reminds me you should have this." Benjen pulled out a dagger and handed it to Lyanna. "Put this in your boot just in case and do not hesitate to use it."

Lyanna took the dagger with a confused look. "I have a dagger and the sword already."

"Yes but a dagger in the boot is the most useful if someone tries to force himself upon you. Trust me, one can never be too careful."

Lyanna obeyed Benjen and shoved the dagger in her boot. "Do you think someone will try to rape me or otherwise hurt me?"

"I will not lie, it's a possibility. I will be accompanying you through the castle so no one would dare to harm you in any way, however as I said before, one can never be too careful."

"Indeed." It would be just a few minutes before they arrive at the first building of Castle Black but one think still bothered Lyanna. "How did Brandon learn about my mother's supposed kidnapping by my father?"

Benjen looked at her with an intrigued expression. "Would you believe me if I told you I never truly thought of that? Hmm, maybe someone saw your parents and then told Brandon about the sighting, but why would he or she tell him it was kidnapping?"

Lyanna wanted to add to his uncle's conclusion. "Maybe it was interpreted as kidnapping by whoever saw them or just made the kidnapping think up to anger Brandon, well we will probably never know, but whoever told Brandon about it, is responsible for Robert's Rebellion."

Benjen rubbed his chin. "The problem is that the only one who could tell us about it would be Brandon but the problem with the death is that they can't tell us anything anymore."

"True." Lyanna nodded as they finally arrived at Castle Black which was no true castle in the true sense of it. It consisted of several stone towers and timber keeps without any walls to protect it from the south of the wall. Lyanna knew it was because no one truly expected Castle Black would be attacked from that direction. She thought it was a foolish assumption. "Always assume the unexpected and you will never be surprised." She thought.

"Follow me, if you want to speak with maester Aemon we must head to the rookery." Lyanna nodded and continued to ride next to her uncle.

They came across two recruits training with the swords. There was one man just shouting at them, he was slim black haired with streaks of gray. When he saw Benjen he called to him. "Ah Stark, you are finally back, the Lord Commander has been asking about you. And I see you have company, you surely know we do not accept the girls into the Night's Watch, so who is she? Your whore?"

Lyanna clenched the hilt of her sword upon this insult but before she could say anything to this man, Benjen spoke. "I see you are charming as ever Thorne, however allow me to enlighten you, no, she is no recruit, despite the fact she would be probably better than any of the bunch you are now training if you can call it that. She is Lyanna Snow, daughter of my brother Lord Eddard Stark, warden of the North, so no whore of mine, plus I have no need for whores, I am not you."

Alliser Thorne's face didn't show any sign of anger as Lyanna would have expected, rather the men retained the cold stern expression."I have never broken my oath Stark, and if she is a bastard, well many female bastards end up as whores or do you have some other plans for your future Lady Snow?"

Lyanna could feel Zyraxes hidden in her bag getting angry. "Calm down girl, I can handle this." Lyanna looked at Thorne who was piercing her with a questioning gaze. "For starters, I could become a much better sword instructor than you." She said it with the most confident and cheeky tone to get a reaction from him, which followed.

Ser Thorne pointed his finger at her "You dare to question my methods of training? I am a master at arms here, I know what I am doing, you are just an insolent bastard girl, what are you doing here anyway?"

Benjen interfered. "Her business here is her own and we wasted enough time here already, so as much as I enjoyed watching this conversation we should move, Lyanna come. let's Ser Alliser continue his… well training."

"If you two are so clever, why don't she show me how or what she would teach those two idiots, or are you afraid?"

Lyanna looked at two boys, they were not a noble birth obviously and certainly not trained with the blade however she never backed down from a challenge. "I can do that, Ser." She got off her horse, took a dull sword from a nearby rack and headed towards two recruits, Benjen just smirked and patiently waited for her to finish. "Let's begin with introductions, what are your names?"

Two recruits were clearly nervous as they were not used to girls with the sword and bold attitude talking to them, but in the end they introduced themself to Lyanna. "I am called Grenn."

"I am Pypar but everyone calls me Pyp."

Lyanna noded with a smile. "Very well I am Lyanna Snow, nice to meet you, now attack me."

Both of them looked at each other clearly hesitant and confused to make any move at her. Until Pyp spoke. "Lady Snow, we can't just attack you, you are... well a woman."

Lyanna smirked. "Do you think that is an obstacle for you to attack me? I heard the wildling woman fight just as fiercely as men. Will you let yourself be killed by them just because they have a cunt between their legs?"

Both were taken back by her attitude and how casually she put this information to them but both answered. "No, my lady."

Lyanna assumed her favorite defensive sword stance and with the frown she bid them a challenge. "Then stop hesitating and attack me."

Both launched at her, with a screaming and with obvious lack of experience which she immediately noticed. She quickly blocked their strike one after the another, than she disarmed Pyp and kick him to the stomach incapacite him in the process and than parried strike from Grenn causing his sword to move aside, she used her momentum and swing her blade towards him and stopped just a few inches before his neck, he dropped the sword and put his hands in the air admitting defeat.

"Do you know what your problem is?" Both shook their heads. "I can see where you are going to strike the moment you raise your swords, which I can't really blame you, given you had no experience nor training with the blade, plus the screaming doesn't help too much." Lyanna handed the Pyp his fallen sword. "Well I am going to show you some basic defensive and attack stances and how to use them, it won't take long and you can learn more from there."

While this was going on Ser Alliser just stared at them, he was surprised that the Ned's Stark bastard was so skilled and graceful with the blade. Benjen was smiling next to him than looking at Alliser. "She is good, isn't she?"

Alliser looked back at him with raised eyebrows. "I suppose, in fact if she wasn't a girl she would be the least useless recruit I have to work with."

Benjen chuckled. "I guess it's the highest praise anyone can get from you."

"I don't need to praise the recruits, I just need some men who are not complete failures, because we will need such men soon."

This caught Benjen's attention. "More strange news from beyond the Wall?"

Alliser nodded. "Aye, besides the things which were already reported by you and your rangers, we received the news about the massive gathering of wildlings and there is also the other thing about those… well the walking corpses with blue eyes and the claims about others returning. I don't like it, Stark, something is going to attack us and all we have are these cunts or criminals, we will need support from the seven kingdoms if we are to defend the realm."

"I know I was about to inform my brother about it, however something came up before I could."

"The bastard huh? Why does she want to see the old maester anyway?"

Benjen's face got a neutral and then almost threatening expression. "Personal business Ser Alliser, which means none of your's."

Alliser frowned. "Indeed? I just hope her business will be solved quickly."

"No worries about it, so far the only one who holds us up is you and your challenge" Benjen smirked.

Alliser just shrugged. "I must admit I didn't expect her to just go and try to teach those two idiots how to fight and I wouldn't expect a girl let alone a bastard to know how to use a sword either. Who trained her?"

Before Benjen could answer a loud voice call to both of them. "I thought you had a better thing to do than chatting here." Before them stood an old man with a long gray beard of imposing figure. "Ser Alliser, I did appoint you master at arms to train the recruits and not to let a girl do it for you now, did I?"

Alliser opened his mouth to answer but Benjen was faster. "Lord Commander, please forgive us, Ser Alliser here just do not take doubts about his training methods lightly, so when my niece openly doubted those methods, he challenged her to show him how to do it better."

"Is that so? Well, then Ser Alliser is lucky that we can't take girls into our ranks, she could pose a competition for him."

Alliser just frowned. "With all the respect, Lord Commander, this wall will melt before Ned's Stark bastard will be able to offer any advice or do any better job than me in training those recruits."

Lord Commander shrugged and then looked at Benjen. "So, you brought your niece here. I hope you have a good reason for doing so."

"Indeed, Lord Commander, I came with her to see maester Aemon for advice in a private matter."

Benjen earned a questionable look. "Private matter? I thought they have a maester in Winterfell too, why bother coming here?"

"As I said, a private matter in which maester Luwin couldn't help."

"Truly? Well I want to talk with you and her anyway before she sees maester Aemon, bring her to my solar when she is done training them."

After a while Lyanna was finally somewhat content with the Grenn and Pyp progress she nodded and told them to stop. "Well, I can't say you will be as good as Arthur Dayne or Barrestan Selmi anytime soon but neither am I and who knows maybe one day you will reach that level of skill."

Both of them looked at each other skeptically after which Grenn spoke. "Do you actually believe that my lady?"

Lyanna shrugged. "Not really, however everyone has a right to dream, besides if you at least learn how to stop some wildling from cutting your head off, I say it's progress." She winked at them." Both chuckled. "Anyway, it's time to let you go back into the hands of Ser Alliser, gods help you. Just try to repeat those stances I showed you today and you will be fine, farewell."

Both bowed their heads slightly. "Farewell, my Lady."

When she was back she received a stern gaze from Ser Alliser. "I thank you lady Snow for your effort to try to teach those... well recruits how to fight." He bowed mockingly and he had already begun to leave to oversee their training again when Lyanna coudn't help herself and spoke again.

"Well someone needs to do it, you are welcome by the way." He looked at her like she was some wildling and he wanted her death though she just smiled. "Farewell Ser Alliser I would say it was a pleasure to meet you however it really wasn't."

He frowned at Lyanna and was about to say something when he finally noticed something that he previously didn't. He realized she had purple-amethyst eyes, the eyes he remembered from his days in King's Landing. "Her eyes, I saw such eyes before at the members of the royal family, but not at members of house Stark, hmm strange." He quickly recovered from his brief stun and left without another word.

Benjen put his hand on her shoulder. "I think you just made an enemy for life."

"What, he would become my enemy over this?"

"It's either that or you gained his respect, no one can really tell with Ser Alliser Thorne, he is a bitter man."

"Why? How did he end up here anyway?"

"He fought for the crown during the rebellion and after the sacking of King's Landing was over, Tywin Lannister gave him a choice: death or the Wall."

Lyanna now gained entirely a new view on Ser Alliser, not that she stopped thinking he was bad at training of course, although she understood why he seemed to be so bitter. "So he is still angry because he was forced to be here and because his only crime was loyalty to Targaryen…. to my family."

"Yes that's correct but let us not dwell on it now, unfortunately while you were training those two recruits the Lord Commander showed up and expressed a desire to speak with you so we must go to his solar and hear what he has to say before I can take you to maester Aemon."

Lyanna raised her eyebrow. "Did he say why he wants to speak with me?"

"No, but I am sure he will tell you the reason once we are in his solar. Come on, let us not keep him waiting."

Lord Commander Jeor Mormont studied Lyanna carefully as she was sitting across the table and was looking at him with not too happy expression. "So you are Lyanna Snow, the bastard daughter of Lord Eddard Stark."

A raven standing on his arm began to speak. „Snow, snow"

Lyanna looked at the raven more closely, he seemed too big for the raven, she didn't even try to guess how old he was, then she looked back to the Lord Commander. "Yes, I am, and you must be Lord Commander Mormont, pleasure to meet you."

"Likewise, so tell me, do you often teach others how to use a sword?"

"I practice alongside my brother Robb Stark and father's ward Theon Greyjoy so you can say we teach each other. Besides this, I also try to teach my sister Arya."

"Hmm and how did Lord Stark let you do that and not some other activities more suited for a lady?"

Lyanna smirked. "I simply didn't ask for permission. I just took up a training sword and went to join Robb on the courtyard, yes my father tried to stop me few times and tried to make me to do the stupid lady-like activities alongside my sister Sansa, however I simply ignored those, so he gave up after the while and especially after I told him I want to learn how to fight because it's much more useful to me than dancing and kniting and soon after he let me to learn swordfight, archery, horseriding and war strategy."

Mormont chuckled. "You would fit with our women on Bear Island, they also do not bother to learn lady-like activities and they rather learn how to fight, though dancing they learn at least a little."

"Dancing and singing have its merits, that's why I learned that too but I doubt you summoned me here to discuss my skill with the sword or dancing, so tell me, what can I do for you?"

"Very good, let's get to the point then."

Before he could continue he was interrupted by his raven. "Corn, corn."

The Lord Commander just groaned. "No corn, Not until I am finished talking with Lady Snow here."

Raven took flight, landed on the table before Lyanna and looked at her with curiosity. "Snow, snow." Lyanna's own curiosity got the better of her and she was about to try to pet the big raven with her hand but as soon she stretched out her arm the raven jumped on it and began to call vigorously. "Corn, corn."

Lyanna was puzzled for a minute, then chuckled. "Cute. Do you have some corn please?"

Mormont just groaned and looked at Benjen. "Cute she called him, can you believe that?" Benjen just shrugged as the Lord commander handed Lyanna some corn on which the raven immediately began to feed.

"So, Lord Commander, are you going to tell me why you wished to speak to me here?"

"I was about to do it before I was interrupted." He gave a stern gaze to his raven and poured himself a tankard full of beer and took a swig. "I wanted to speak to you for a simple fact, that you are Lord Paramount Eddard's daughter and as such he will probably be willing to listen to you, am I right?"

Lyanna frowned. "No, I am not his daughter, he would rather see me marry me off so my real name would be lost forever." She realized Mormont's urgent gaze. "I think you overestimate my influence over him, Lord Commander. Don't forget, I am not even trueborn, I am just a bastard, Snow."

"That may be so, but given the fact he gave you a home and raised you alongside his trueborn children, tells me that he must care for your wellbeing, other bastards are not so lucky I am sure you know it."

Lyanna noded. "Aye, I suppose I am lucky in a way." The raven finished eating and flew off Lyanna's arm on the Lord Commander's shoulder. "What do you want me to tell my father? Can't just write him in the letter or tell him through my uncle Benjen? He is his brother you know, so he holds a great influence too."

Benjen, who was silent so far, joined the conversation. "I am informing my brother on the state of the Night's Watch for some time now already and he seem not to be bothered by it and I was about to inform him about the threats beyond the wall when I was visiting Winterfell, however you asked me to take you to maester Aemon so I didn't get to that."

Mormont nodded. "You see Lady Snow, I want you to add your voice to Benjen's and convince Lord Stark to help the Nights Watch and also to ask his friend, King Robert for help."

"I really doubt I can make a difference but, if it's so important to you Lord Commander, I can only try to speak with my father about it, if and when I meet him." Mormont upon hearing her answer nodded, although Lyanna got curious why the Lord Commander sounded so desperate and urgent. "Is some kind of threat coming?"

It was Benjen who answered her. "The Night's Watch is in a very bad state to say the least, you saw it yourself, did you not? The two recruits you had the honor of training, represent the quality of most of our men and we have only six hundred men here at Castle Black, two hundred at East Watch by the Sea and even less at Shadow Tower. And if there is a threat? Well, we know very little for now but some things are certain. The wildlings are moving in large numbers somewhere and it's possible they are preparing for the attack on the wall, if that is the case they would outnumber us at least twenty to one. Do you think we can defend the Wall with what we have?"

"From what I saw, no probably not and if the Night's Watch fails to defend the wall against the wildlings….. The north will be their next target."

"Yes, you are right, Lyanna, however it's not even wildling, who gives me sleepless nights these days."

This caught Lyanna's attention. "What's that supposed to mean, uncle?"

Before Benjen could answer he was interrupted by the Lord Commander. "It means, your uncle said more than he should as we know very little about all the threats yet. All you need to know for now is the fact, we really need aid from the king and your father. You can help us with it, if you can convince him to speak with his old friend."

"So be it, although I can't say I like the fact, you are trying to hide something from me, Lord Commander, but if you finally let me go to speak with maester Aemon, I will try to have a word with my father about the sore state of the Night's Watch."

"That is all I ask Lady Snow."

"Snow, snow" Raven began to call again.

"Shut up you damned bird! Benjen, escort her to the Maester Aemon." Lyanna got up and followed Benjen out of the room but before she could exit Lord Commander spoke to her again. "And one more thing." Lyanna turned around to look at him. "Try to finish your business with our maester quickly, this is no place for a lady."

Lyanna nodded. "Well, I have no desire to be here longer than I need to, farewell, Lord Commander."

"Farewell, Lady Snow."

With that she and Benjen began to walk towards Rookery under which Maester Aemon had his chambers. "So are you going to tell me uncle, what gives you sleepless nights?"

Benjen sighed. "I probably shouldn't, Lord Commander is right, we don't know enough to come to any conclusions and it's really for the best you don't know more than you heard."

Lyanna stopped and folded her arms "Uncle Benjen, if you haven't said what you have said back in the solar, I wouldn't be so interested about this threat but since I know you as a brave man it's quite unsettling, when you tell me that something gives you sleepless nights. So, could you tell me what in the seven hells is going on beyond the Wall?"

Benjen stopped too and looked at Lyanna and when he saw her folding her arms, commanding stature and authoritative face he was lost for words for a minute, then he chuckled.

Lyanna raised her eyebrow "Is there something funny?"

"Nothing, you just looked exactly like your mother when she wanted something and was refused."

Lyanna was taken a back a little and her gaze softened. "Oh, really?"

"Yes, well come let's move by standing here we would only attract attention, I will tell you what I know on the way. Besides, I wasn't able to deny anything to your mother. How can I deny anything to you?"

"It's very simple, you can't." She replied with a small smile on her face and they both began to walk again.

"Look, all I know are just rumors and information me and my rangers got out of more talkative wildlings or wildling prisoners, not confirmed facts."

"It doesn't mean it's not true."

"Indeed, well what you heard about wildling is somewhat true, we know they are moving, we found the whole villages empty, I don't know if they were killed or left. The captured wildlings said they are uniting under one banner to survive."

"To survive? Survive what?"

"There are rumors of the walking corpses with blue glowing eyes, attacking and killing everything they come across, wildlings call those wights and they say the Others has returned."

Lyanna blinked in surprise. "The Others and wights? It sounds like rubbish, those are just tales to frighten children."

"Says someone who hatched a dragon egg on her bed…"

"That's something different, everyone knows the dragons existed, people saw them but no one saw the Others for thousands of years if the records of the Long Night are to be believed."

"True, however I think something is going on beyond the Wall, those rumors, wildlings moving under one banner plus the rangers I sent out to confirm those rumors, well none of them returned, not even one. Lyanna, I don't know what in the seven hells is going on there, but whatever it is, it's not good. I fear that those books about the Long Night can actually be the truth."

Lyanna felt like it gotten colder, she knew uncle Benjen was very serious about the things he just told her and she suddenly felt fear but it was not just hers fear it was Zyraxes who was afraid."Muña, please don't go north I don't know what's up there but I feel we shouldn't go there."

"Darling, don't be afraid we are not going that way."

"I can feel something ominous and sinister to the north, please don't go that way."

Benjen noticed Lyanna's silence. "Is there something wrong?"

"No, nothing with me at least, It's Zyraxes, she is afraid of something beyond the wall, maybe terrified would be better word and I share her feelings through our bond somewhat."

"Then if your dragon can feel something is wrong, do you still think the Long Night is just a tale to frighten children?"

"I think that if it's true and the Others are truly walking beyond the Wall again…well, we may have a problem."

As soon as she said it they arrived at the building which was their destination, a Rookery and beneath it maester's quarters. "That is an understatement of the century. Enough of that, let's go meet maester Aemon."

They moved inside the maester's chambers, it looked rough yet well kept. There were a few book shelves filled with books, a bed, several closets and candle stands. There was also a table at which two men were sitting. When Lyanna saw them she immediately guessed which one is maester Aemon because both of them were old but one looked still young compared to the other. Younger man was hunched, bold and short with rounded shoulders. He was reading the book aloud to who Lyanna assumed was maester Aemon, bald, wrinkled, and shrunken looking man and by his white eyes also blind man.

When the younger one saw Benjen and Lyanna he stopped reading. "Maester Aemon, I am sorry but the First Ranger and a young lady are here to see you."

Maester Aemon turned to the direction of the doors like he was looking at them despite his blindness. "Oh, greetings First Ranger, can I do something for you or your companion?"

"Greetings, maester Aemon, I am alright however my niece needs to talk to you about something important."

"Yes, greetings, Maester Aemon. I am Lyanna Snow. I came here because I have a certain problem on which I could use your advice."

Maester Aemon smiled. "Something that even maester Luwin couldn't handle? That must be quite a more complicated problem than. Go on, tell me what this problem is."

"I am sorry but it's a very delicate problem of private character."

Aemon just nodded with understanding. "Clydas, that will be all for today, go and get some rest."

"As you wish, maester." Clydas took a book back to the bookshelf and left the room.

Benjen looked at Lyanna and put hand on her shoulder and nodded after he looked at Maester. "Farewell, maester Aemon I shall wait on my niece outside and ensure nobody unwelcome will come here or eavesdrop, if you don't mind."

"By all means, First Ranger."

When Benjen left, Aemon smiled again and gestured toward the chair on the opposite side of the table like he wasn't blind at all. "Come, Lady Snow, sit down and tell what advice you need from a tired old man."

Lyanna walked slowly toward the table, put her bag containing Zyraxes on the table and took a long, deep breath before she started talking.

So, here we have the fourth chapter and the longest so far. Again, I depicted Lyanna's/Visenya's struggle with her identity plus a little bit of history from Benjen's perspective. Also, I am not sure when Grenn and Pypar arrived at the Wall but it seems to me better to put those two there more than some random recruits. And Ser Alliser, well he couldn't be left out. I teased the Others or the White Walkers but they won't be playing a huge part in this story for now. Next, there will be the talk with maester Aemon and well, let's just say Ned isn't far away from The Castle Black.

Again, I thank everyone who favored or followed this story. Also thanks for all the reviews, even for the negative ones because they can help me get this story better too.

Alphagirl16

Loved the chapter and can't wait for the next. I like that Ameon is being brought in much earlier. I hope Ned and Lyanna are able to make up because I get her pain but ultimately he did what he did out of love and to protect her. Also will we get to see a return to the old gods for the Stark family?

Well Lyanna understands why Ned did what he did, but she is still angry at him for keeping the truth hidden from her. And I am not sure what do you mean by the return to the Old Gods, as far as I remember, all the Starks in the books maybe except Sansa are followers of the Old Gods, The Faith of the Seven was present in Winterfell only because of Catelyn but I think Ned will have a talk with her about that.

N

Love the story but I think you should work on formatting a little. " that mark goes on top not bottom.

I wrote it like this because in my country we use " at the bottom at the start, however I figured out how to write it up on my keyboard, so from now on it will be written correctly.

vulcran

so what about her and domeric Bolton?

They met while Lyanna was fostered in Barrowtown. So far they are just good friends. That is how Lyanna feels at least.

Sammy-1000

Will the pairing be Lyanna X Robb

That would be very unlikely. I don't think Robb would see Lyanna like someone other than his sister and simply wouldn't love her romantically because of that, which would stop any romance between them even if Lyanna accepts her Valyrian/Targaryen heritage because Robb is still a Stark.

Also thanks to: Princess of Greenwood2, beemariex, HexOfFire, ChristinaCay, Zhorvak and 24michael for positive comments.