Random Fic Way too random to title
May have slight OOCness and sever randomness but who cares? Sorry for the typos – can't be bothered to check it.
Summary: Contains Inuyasha, A Lot of Randomness, Death, The Simpsons, Hippies, Emos, Malcolm in the Middle and Star Trek. I think that's it. I'm not sure. Well if you don't know what any of these things are it may be slightly harder to understand. Not too hard though. :)
After walking for hours in some deserted random place, as you can imagine, they get seriously bored as Inuyasha err kindly shows you,
"ARGHHHHHHHHHHH! I'M SO BORED AS HELL!" and as Miroku, sadly, agrees,
"Tell me about it I don't even feel like-"Sango reaches for her hiraikotsu "err I mean err… never mind" Kagome sinks her head down,
"If there really isn't anything to do I might al well go home for a few days" Buuuut sure as anything the most unlikely thing happens, well to them anyway which makes them all say,
"WTF!" Every enemy they've ever met plus countless demons appear out of nowhere, alive or dead.
Most of the demons are completely confused (i.e. "Hey what the hell is going on?" "Huh?" "Wha?"?) but if they did that forever it would get boring wouldn't it? Soooo lets pick one at random… ahh! Jakotsu –he's cool,
"INUYASHA! OOOOO I missed you! I'm so glad I get to see you die! This must be the luckiest day of my life- whatever life this is"
"WHA? AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"
Miroku quickly puts up a barrier for them to… discuss what the hell just happened,
"What the hell just happened? Aren't they supposed to be dead?"
"I believe Naraku is up to his old tricks again." Miroku replies.
Kohaku appears causing Sango to rush out to him,
"Kohaku!" Kohaku sickle thingy hits Sango nearly knocking her out, "Kohaku?" She has to keep dodging him but at the same time manages to get a few of demons attacking her as well.
"WIND SCAR!... Look Naraku I don't know what you're up to this time but how the hell did you get so many demons and what's with all the dead guys!"
This isn't my doing, Inuyasha. I just appeared here but I might as well get a few chores done while I'm here."
"Inuyasha, I think the person doing this may be the person writhing this why the hell does she have to ruin the fun?down"
"Wha? What the Hell?" Grr… this is annoying so God, err me, is gonna joining in,
"Kagome, I think you should do less thinking and watch you back more" Kagura's dance of the blades is about to hit her but someone has to ruin it by blocking it.
"Grr… YOU SON OF A BITCH!"
"ARGH I am a girl, MORON!"
"Oh right – you BITCH!"
"Just shut up and get on with it, you did want excitement didn't you?" Large keyboard hits his head – ugh now I'll have to get a new one.
"Not very easy with things hitting my head" Large bucket of water drops onto his head – that'll teach him to mess with me.
"Not easy being wet and having a bucket over my head either!"
"Oooo picky, picky" Takes bucket off head so you can see his anger level go up to infinity.
Jakotsu"OOOO you're sooooooooooo cute when you're angry"
Inuyasha goes into almost demon like mood (i.e. starts killing everything like a maniac)
"Oh yeah! That reminds me. Tonight's the night of the new moon" Inuyasha faints, "Aww it's not that bad this'll bake it more… interesting"
"You cannot be serious?" Anger level reaches infinity squared.
"Y'know maybe you need anger management… I suggest talking to Nat – she's not bad when it comes to anger management muah ha ha ha haaaaa… but for now have a banana and maybe a chicken" Banana appears in his had and roasted chicken appears on his head. HAHAHAHAHA keep this up and I'll be in hysterics – even Naraku's laughing!
"Oooo YAY the Sun's setting!"
"NUUUUUUUUUUU!" Turns human.
"Muah ha ha ha haaaaa being evil's fun"
Meanwhile, having Sesshomaru appeared too, he destroyed most of the demons in the way to get to Naraku but since there are countless demons we won't bother him till it gets interesting.
"So, Inuyasha, you turn human on the night of the New Moon? This will indeed be helpful buuut then again I could just kill you now and get it over with… naahh the other way's much more fun… muah ha ha ha haaaaa…!"
Suddenly an arrow pierces through Naraku's heart.
"Kikyo! You… you…" Oh My God she just killed Naraku! I wonder…
Kikyo!" Inuyasha finds her and after a brief moment of shock which is pretty sad considering, "Kikyo, how did y-, what- Kikyo…" Sad dramatic moment. Inuyasha is about to err 'embrace' her when…
"Hic, hic"
"Kikyo, are you- Are you drunk?"
"Oh don't worr-hic-y Inuyasha. I killed Naraku for you didn't I? hic" How the hell did she get drunk? Hmm… that would explain that smell of alcohol every time I zap something down there. I wonder if anyone else is drunk.
"Lord Sesshomaru –hic- why have you- hic stopped?"
"Naraku is dead and- Jaken! Are you drunk too?"
"Wha? Of course I'm not- hic drunk Lord Sesshie"
"Jaken!"
"Sesshie we should sing in cele-hic-bration of Naraku's- hic death!"
"JAKEN!"
"Naraku is deaaaaaad hi hic hooray! Naraku ish deash hoor-hic-ay!" Starts to pour bottle of Vodka on head as he sings in jiberish.
"J-A-K-E-N!" Why bother?
Meanwhile Inuyasha sits down,
"Humph, this is so awkward. Kikyo is drunk!" Kagome stares at him,
"What about Naraku?" He just realises that he completely forgot about him, only thinking about Kikyo,
"Huh? Oh uhh umm oh yeah…" Kagome slaps head. Now I need to get rid of some of these lousy demons that are still alive. Ah! I know! Dewey (Malcolm in the Middle) pops up.
Inuyasha"WTF?"
Dewey talks to most of the demons. Large crash as all the demons start to kill each other (he can do that. You'd know if you watch the program)
People left now: Inuyasha gang, Sesshomaru, Kagura, Jaken and a drunken Kikyo.
"Well that was weird"
"Duh, Inuyasha, what the hell was that demon doing?" God, they're dumb,
"YOU IDIOTS! How can you not recognise Dewey from Malcolm in the Middle?"
Everyone else? Me: anime fall
"Idiots! Just get on with it or I'll bring Naraku back" Everyone goes back to normal, apart from Kikyo and Jaken who are still drinking.
Inuyasha: "So what were we doing?" Everyone else: anime fall
In boredom Bart Simpson turns up holding a squishee. Inuyasha sniffs it and realising its heavenly scent runs up and snatches one, drinking it all in one gulp,
"Taaasty. It's better than ramen!" Everyone else: OO
"Hey, man! That's my squishee!"
"You can't own a squishee, man. It belongs to mother nature" -- Random hippy guy
Everyone else: o.O
Bart aims his sling shot at Inuyasha and fires it knocking him. Inuyasha twitches as he turns round. Bart sees his angry face.
"Woah! Calm down, dude" Inuyasha takes out his Tetsuiga and realises he can't use the wind scar. So instead he runs up and grabs Kohaku's sickle and slashes Bart's neck.
"YOU KILLED BART SMPSON!"
"Oh like you're one to talk! You're writing this damn thing!"
"Hmm… I wonder what Naraku'll say about that…" Kagome butts in,
"Ignore Inuyasha right now ; err Mr Writer, sir"
"I am a GIRL you idiot! Get it? G-I-R-L girl!" Kagome whispers to Inuyasha,
"Is that person really a girl?"
"Well that's what she says"
" She sure doesn't look like a girl"
Maybe she's a transsexual" CHAT OVER!
"Inuyasha"
"What?
"GO TO HELL!" Magical pixie turns up and waves its wand. Flames go up as Inuyasha fades into the depths of hell.
"INUYASHA!"
"Jeez, Kagome. You need to calm down. Be happy that you've been the centre of attention recently"
"I don't care, bring Inuyasha back"
"Y'know what? I can let the pixies show you some more tricks. Would you like that?" Kagome backs away at the threat.
"Hey, where have Kikyo's soul collectors gone?"
"Miroku, they are not called soul collectors they're cool snaky things"
Miroku: --
"And beside s the point Kikyo's gone as well"
" I wonder where?"
"You pathetic moron. She went to hell with Inuyasha, duh!"
"May I ask you one final question?"
"If it's what I'm thinking of-"
"Will you be-". SMACK! Sango huffed
"Yo, writer girl! Can we do something? I'm getting bored" Kagura called.
"Huh? Oh right. You can go off to a nice corner and read a book"
"I mean seriously"
"Umm… Go fight Sesshomaru"
"EH?" Kagura quickly dodges as Sesshomaru fires his Tokijin.
"YOU SHOULD BE AGAINST HER YOU KNOW!"
"pfft If you would stop following me around"
"I DO NOT FOLLOW YOU"
"Then stop shouting"
"I AM NOT SHOU- shouting"
"much clapping finally you stopped! my ear was hurting"
"shut up damn writer"
"whatever" Kagura and Sesshomaru stand there awkwardly until
"KICK THE CAN!"
"What the hell?"
"I'm Doug here with you for another episode of Kick the Can!"
"Who the hell you?"
"Sesshomaru? How would you like to kick the can?"
"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?" Fires tokijin. Loud crash as Doug dies
"Meanie!" I throw a can knocking his head. Sesshomaru turns head around but finds...
"SESHIE! POO CHICKEN! POO CHICKEN!"(don't ask where i got the idea from) Sesshomaru has a disturbed look, "POO CHICKEN! hic" Jaken falls down to the ground and falls asleep with two eggs (poo chicken) on his eyes. There's an awkward silence as he looks at this crazy imp thing.
Meeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaanwhile (yep a looooooong while) Sango holds Kohaku's jewel shard mourning his death in Miroku's arms as Miroku resists his saddo temptation but he fails. Poor Sango but she doesn't notice! SMACK! Well maybe not. Kagura quickly sneaks behind them to kill 'em but Shippo turns in a giant mushroom again to shock her. She kills him in an instant. Dr Hibbert turns up (Simpsons).
"Kagome I'm afraid it's too late. He's dead."
"I KNOW THAT!"
"Time of Death Apple O' Clock"
"That makes no sense"
"I'm sure you're sad please come this way"
"Get away from me freak!"
Ahh I'm bored. Where's Kagura? OO She's dead! S-S-S-Sesshomaru k-k-k-k-killed her? OOOOOO Not possible I mean he's... HOW?
"Sesshomaru how c-could y-"Dead. Sesshomaru was just standing there staring at the sky until Rin popped along and they disappeared together with Jaken staggering behind cause of his hangover.
"Sesshomaru-sama! Wait for me!" At least someone's not dead.
Suddenly there was a flash of green and all these mechanical type looking men were walking around.
"We are the Borg. You will be assimilated. Resistance is futile" They chanted, tonelessly. They started walking around making a loud racket with their big metal feet things. They took Sango and assimilated her with their cool things that come outta their hands.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Miroku cried before another Borg drone assimilated him. They left Kagome since she acted so lifeless. She was lifeless! She was lying on a rock. In her right hand was Tetsuiga and there was blood dripping down from it. Her wrists, they were slit. Her eyes, wide open.
But out in space about a few billion light years away, the Borg were destroying some evil planet with a giant sucking thing.
The End
That's the end. Now I know that since Naraku's dead Miroku would've lost his Kazaana wind tunnel thingy but it's still in his memories. OK so I would like some reviews of some sort for this but most'll probably be flames. Sigh. Oh well, don't blame ya the randomness freaked myself out.