The small, pale gray, nearly white she-cat stumbled through the forest on pure white paws. Everything felt numb, from the tips of her claws to the tips of her ears, her heart felt like a solid chunk of ice inside her chest.
Her paws dragged along the narrow, hidden path toward the familiar clearing… the secret clearing only she and her beloved Smokepaw knew about.
There place… the kit visibly shuttered as cold realization filled her with dread as thick, warm tears filled her eyes. Her paws swayed beneath her, rooted to the ground and as heavy as stone but she swallowed the emotion in her throat, pushing on.
The thick, lush, bright foliage of the tunnel that guarded the camp shivered as a brown tom entered camp, his apprentice skipping after him.
"I can't believe I caught a sparrow!" The thick-furred gray tom exclaimed happily, weak sunlight glinting off the darker splotches on his pelt, dark blue eyes gleaming with pride.
The kit watched as the lean-muscled tom's big, heavy paws carried him across camp, her own firmly rooted beside the nursery. Her body warmed in pride as her heart sped up, noticing the tom's small, white fangs peeking over the prey in his jaws.
'EchoClan, just when I think this tom can't get any more adorable.' The lovesick kit gushed, feeling dizzy as her paws swayed.
"Hey Silverkit," The tom called, "wanna share this with me?" His tail-tip swayed like a snake as the sizable prey set on the ground beneath his paws.
"Oh, uh…., The kit blinked back to reality, "Sure." She said, bounding after him.
Sliverkit stumbled at the weight of the memory, a fresh wave of grief washing over her as she blinked the tears from her eyes, looking up.
Her heart clenched with sadness as she found in an achingly familiar clearing, paws shaking and threatening to buckle. It was a wide circle of flattened, soft grass surrounded by tall, leafy, lush greenery, giving privacy and shielding it from the outside world. The kit padded numbly to a spot of darker grass and buried her nose in it, inhaling the young tom's still lingering scent like it was precious, sweet-smelling oxygen. She cried, relieving herself of her dizzying grief in the form of heavy racking sobs that shook her small body.
She briefly thought of joining him as she curled up in the spot he'd been just days ago, stretched out with his forepaw around her and her head against his chest. His strong, steady, rhythmic heartbeat in her ear like a sweet lullaby. The spot seemed warm, she noted… tauntingly, eerily warm.
Warmth and a surreal inner peace settled in her as a purr rumbled in her throat. The handsome young tom was curled around, so close she could feel his body heat. For a few peaceful, blissful heartbeats, neither opened their eyes… just enjoying the simple pleasure of being together and seeming to breathe in sync.
The kit opened her large gray eyes, feeling as if she was staring into the midnight sky itself. Endless and depthless.
"Silverkit," the gray tom began, and that's when she realized his slender, darker-tipped tail was under her jaw, "don't follow me." The tom's eyes sparkled with sadness.
The kit stepped away, as much as it pained her, ears flattened in shock as she opened her mouth. The tom laughed softly, a deep, rumbling sound that set her at ease. A slender tail wrapped her, pulling her toward him until they were only a small gap between them.
"Silverkit," The apprentice said again, those eyes she loved so much softening with affection, love… and something else as he placed a paw to her cheek, "move on… be happy."
At that moment, an image flashed in the kit's mind, a thick-furred tom, pelt an odd, intoxicating smoky black with icy blue eyes that seemed to pierce her soul. Guilt spiked in the kit's heart.
"Stormpaw's good for you." Smokepaw reassured, "Be happy with him." The young, handsome tom licked the brigde of her nose. Silverkit blushed, suddenly feeling bold and determined as warmth tingled between her legs and her heart sped up.
"C—Can't give you something?" She asked shyly. Smokepaw smirked, a knowing glint in his eye.
A short time later found the kit purring in contentment, body warm and fuzzy. The larger tom curled around her, tail draped over her as they panted. Silverkit drank in the tom's form hungrily, eyes tracing the lean, taut, slightly defined muscles beneath his thick pelt.
The small, dusty white kit shivered, her loud cry of "SMOKEPAW" ringing in her ears as plainly as the dull, pleasurable throbbing between her legs…. the grass damp and darkened with blood.
Tears dripping at her paws like raindrops as her uncurled herself, the last trace of warmth disappearing like mist from her pelt.