Chapter 14
Two hours had passed since Lucky and Jason had returned from the restroom to find that Alan and Monica had run off to Elizabeth's side. AJ had returned ten minutes ago with the food he had promised and as the rest of the family ate in Emily's room, the young man sat by himself in the corner, blankly staring at the wall. Skye had tried to coax him into eating but AJ had refused her ministrations and denied himself any sort of refreshment. He didn't even mind when Jason broke down and decided to eat after all, taking the sandwich that AJ had prepared for himself. Nothing seemed to get a rise out of him, no matter how much his sisters and the others tried to get him to respond. Instead, AJ just sat there mutely, blindly staring ahead but seeing nothing before him.
Alan and Monica had not returned to their daughter's room since the time they had been forced to leave it. And so the entire company sat, the anticipation proving frustrating to no end. At one point, Edward stormed out to get some answers but had come back empty-handed. Tempers were short and the comparatively good moods of before had vanished. The conversations was terse, bitter and curt, every word snarled with disdain. Lila was the one to do her best to keep the group together, reminding them that their tempers had no place in the situation they now found themselves in.
Outside, things were better. Much better. In fact, Dr. John Mulrow was downright ecstatic over the results of the tests that he now held in his hands. Alan and Monica, though still deeply grieved from the shock of Elizabeth not remembering them, were encouraged as well and hurried off to tell their family the good news. After some persuasion, they managed to drag John off with them after promising to protect him from their son, and the threesome quickly made their way to Room 124.
Jason was the first to look up when the door opened, and the quiet gripes that peppered the air in the room instantly vanished the second the three doctors stepped into the room. Their appearance, which so often served to intimidate and sadden, gave away nothing of their discovery.
Edward glanced from his son to his daughter-in-law and finally unable to take any more, blurted out, "Well? Don't keep us in a lurch – get on with it! What's the news?"
Lila's hand fell on his, her soft fingers squeezing his gently as she, too, waited for an answer. Alan and Monica glanced at each other before looking to John to break the news. Jason's lips curved into a grimace when the young doctor stepped forward, holding his clip pad before him like some sort of child's security blanket.
"Elizabeth came out of the coma two hours and four minutes ago," he started out explaining in a calm voice. The room was silent, the inhabitants not even daring to breathe as the young man spoke. Luke, Reginald, Lucky and Nikolas were standing against the far wall and strained to catch each word, afraid that they would miss something. Skye, Ned, and Jason sat together near Edward and Lila, who remained near Emily's bedside. Zander was perched on the bed next to his girlfriend, his feet swinging a few inches from the floor, and AJ remained stock-still as he had been for the last fifteen minutes. Still, his ears were craned to pick up Dr. Mulrow's every word.
"It took her a while to come out of it altogether, but when she did, it soon became evident that the sectors of her brain responsible for speech were not damaged," John continued. "She was able to speak clearly and legibly, and after running extensive tests, it became apparent that her motor coordination is not impaired. I hold in my hand the x-rays we were able to take, and they prove very encouraging."
He stepped forward one step further, darting a wary glance at Jason as he did so. But the mobster remained still in his seat, not moving a muscle. His eyes were the only part of him that moved, smoldering and dark as they followed John's every movement. The doctor lay the x-ray slides on the pale sheets of the bed and waited as everyone gathered around to take a look. It was easier this way rather than holding them up and alternating back and forth every so often.
"As you can see, one portion of the brain in particular appears damaged," John explained, outlining that area on the x-ray. Jason was thankful that at least his accident hadn't disabled his ability to understand what was in front of him now. Though he couldn't see paintings very well, he didn't have much of a problem discerning photographs. After all, he was frequently checking surveillance photos on the job anyway, and x-rays were very similar.
"This was why we feared she may have suffered permanent damage," the young doctor continued in a soft voice. "Unfortunately, we had no way of knowing until she came to and showed activity in that area." He looked up at the group, his green eyes shining with a pleased look. "However, after running the tests, we have reason to believe that this is not the case."
Luke was the first to expel a breath of the relief as the rest of them waited for John to continue his explanation. "Though the area has sustained damage, it is by no means permanently debilitating. Elizabeth has selective amnesia."
"Selective amnesia?" Emily parroted, leaning forward in her bed. "You mean – you mean there's a chance that-"
"That it's temporary?" Lucky finished eagerly. His blue eyes darted to Alan and Monica when they shifted their weight. Lila had noticed too, and was frowning.
"What is it, dear?"
Alan fingered his collar, glancing nervously at his wife. "Well, we should probably say something here-"
"We were in Elizabeth's room when she first woke up," Monica spoke, her voice level and clear. Jason straightened abruptly in his chair, an action not missed by his parents. "It took her a minute to speak, but when she did, she asked who we were."
Zander's mouth fell agape on a question that never came. Emily had to press her own lips together to keep her composure, and the stony mask had descended over Jason's face once more. AJ was still sitting ramrod-straight in his chair in the corner, but had now covered his face with his hands.
"Then she asked who she was."
Jason slumped back in his chair and Monica did her best not to look in his direction for fear that she'd lose her composure as well.
"Her amnesia is definitely real," she continued. "Selective amnesia is a tricky sort – we know the least about it. But what we know here is that she is not permanently brain damaged."
Lucky's eyes drifted to Jason's and held his gaze. The two men remained staring at each other as Monica and John stood between them. Jason was the first to break the contact when his lashes fluttered and his eyes closed.
"She may remember completely," John interjected, taking over for a grateful Monica. "She may remember most of everything. But there's still a chance that she won't remember anything. The only thing to be done is to wait and see what happens. Her memory may perhaps be stimulated by cues from her past; it remains to be seen if this helps her in her recollection."
"How-" Luke had trouble getting rid of the frog in his throat. "How is she now?"
"She's sleeping," Alan replied softly. "We did our best to keep her calm through the whole process, but she became very agitated in the beginning when she didn't know who we were and who she was."
"What did you say?"
Jason's voice, though only a whisper, sounded like a gunshot in the quiet room. Monica met his gaze directly for the first time during the conversation, and although Jason could see the relief present in her pale blue eyes, he didn't like the sadness and gloom.
"We told her we were her doctors," Alan spoke up quietly. "It seemed best to leave it at that for the time being. She had enough to deal with and didn't need the added stress of trying to remember us when she couldn't even remember herself. There'll be time in the future to tell her when she's not as…scared."
The thought of Elizabeth waking up alone and scared in a hospital room made something deep inside Jason hurt. It felt like something within him had shattered, like an iron fist had closed around his heart and made it difficult for him to breathe. He, more than anyone in the room or any neurosurgeon in any hospital, knew what that was like. He was the one that had gone through the whole ordeal many years ago; he certainly didn't need any John Mulrow, Ph.D. standing in front of him and explaining the whole damn thing to him in Mickey Mouse terms.
But to his credit, John remained quiet. He had heard of Jason's accident when he was in medical school, and as he worked closely with the Quartermaines and got to know them, he saw the far reaching affects of the accident. Monica and Alan still carried the pain of losing a son and gaining one that didn't want anything to do with them. And he hoped for Jason's sake and the sake of everyone else in the room that Elizabeth didn't turn out that way. Her chances for a full and total recovery were infinitely better than Jason Morgan Quartermaine's had been – in fact, comparing the two was like comparing apples and oranges. Jason's accident had caused permanent and irreversible brain damage; Elizabeth, in ideal conditions, would soon regain hers completely.
"She asked us who she was," Monica spoke up quietly, moving the x-rays aside and wearily sitting down on her daughter's bed. Zander moved aside instantly to give her as much room as he could; it looked like it took everything in her not to collapse down in utter weariness. "That was the hardest part."
Jason closed his eyes, unmindful of how all the eyes in the room unconsciously turned to him. Even Zander found himself staring at the enforcer before he lowered his gaze, embarrassed. After all, he didn't even know Jason before the accident. Everyone else in the room did. Luke's eyes were trained stoically on the young man sitting slumped over in the uncomfortable plastic chair. Yeah, he remembered Jason Quartermaine. And although his opinion wasn't a widely-held one, he liked Jason Morgan much better. He had known him during his old alliance with Sonny Corinthos, and he liked what he saw. Jason had come a long way from the preppy Doogie-Howser-wannabe that he used to be; he was a strong, smart kid with a lot of potential and he lived up to it under Corinthos. Those that were so busy wailing over the death of Jason Quartermaine didn't notice what had taken the future doctor's place – a cool, calm, fiercely determined young man with a good head for business. Luke didn't know how Jason felt about the accident – did he sometimes see the look in his mother's eyes and wish to himself that things were different? Maybe, but that didn't really matter. Because what Luke did know was that Jason was thinking back to the accident right now – only this time, it was Elizabeth instead of him that was waking up in a strange world full of expectant, nameless people with a hell of a lot of hopes and dreams.
Lucky shifted uncomfortably next to his father. Never in a million years had he imagined that Elizabeth would find herself in the same situation as Jason. It was no secret that he wasn't Jason Morgan's biggest fan; in fact, he knew there was a time not too long ago that he had hated the man with everything he had. He had accused him of stealing Elizabeth from him on more than one occasion; had picked a fight with him more times than he could count. He had called him a brain damaged goon with no mind of his own. And now Elizabeth was in the same spot.
The only difference was that she had a chance, which was more than was said for Jason Quartermaine.
Thinking back, he couldn't pinpoint the exact moment in time when his relationship with Jason had soured. He remembered working for the man when he owned a garage – that was where the fire was. He remembered when Jason first met Elizabeth. The man had come by the boxcar where he and Elizabeth were hanging out to give him his paycheck. Elizabeth had been very polite toward his boss, and Jason had reciprocated. They were years apart and had no other connections to each other. It was hard to imagine that those same two people later managed to fall in love.
Even though it still hurt him to think that Jason had given something to Elizabeth that she wasn't able to take from him, somewhere along the way, Lucky had accepted it. He had accepted that he had been pretty unreasonable in the days preceding what his father called Endgame – the last battle between the Spencers and the Cassidines. Elizabeth needed support, comfort, protection. And Jason had offered them to her without question. The truth of the matter wasn't that Jason had stolen her from him – it was that he had consciously lost her.
Lucky didn't profess to know the details of what happened between Elizabeth and the enforcer. One minute, they spent every waking moment together and she was living with him in that bullet-proof penthouse of his. The next, Elizabeth was back at Kelly's and Jason was sucking Sonny's sister's face. He had never asked Elizabeth what had gone down between them; maybe if he was a stronger man, he would have. But in all actuality, he had been happy. The thought of Jason Morgan being rejected by Elizabeth Webber brought a smile to his face, and yes, he was glad that she was finally away from him. IF he had been a stronger man, a better friend, he would have asked her. But he missed his chance. Still, from the look on Jason's face, he knew it didn't matter.
The realization managed to sneak up on him, but Lucky was soon staring it straight on. No matter what happened, Jason would be there for Elizabeth. Just like somehow, he knew she'd be there for him if he needed her.
Lucky didn't understand it; didn't understand what could bring two people back together after all the bad blood between them. He never understood why Jason and Elizabeth kept going back to each other. Elizabeth had told him a long time ago – after they had managed to mend the rift that resulted when they first broke up – that Jason had asked her to run away to Italy with him that day in the park. She had refused, and part of him still wondered if she resented him because he was the reason that she had to say no. Still, when Jason came back and checked in with Sonny, the first person he spoke to was Elizabeth. He rescued her from the crypt, he saved Zander for her several times afterwards even though they certainly weren't on the best of terms then. Something kept bringing them back together, some common bond that refused to be broken no matter the stress that was placed on it.
And now they had one more bond that held them together – they both had to deal with the aftermath of a terrible accident. Lucky wondered to himself how this whole thing would affect Jason. Would he still maintain his relationship with Elizabeth, after everything, or would he let it fade away into obscurity? He knew the two of them hadn't been on speaking terms for a long time. When Ric had been shot, Elizabeth had a few harsh words for Jason. Soon after that, the truth about the lawyer had been revealed and Ric had disappeared. Elizabeth didn't seem to care. She moved on with her life and took great care to avoid both Sonny and Jason, two people she had always felt comfortable with. And now this…
It would be easy for Jason to just drop it, Lucky mused. Elizabeth didn't remember him; there was no need to jump around in front of her face. If she remembered, the pieces would fall where they would. It would be easy for him to keep his distance and continue their cold shoulder routine. But he had to wonder if Jason ever did things the easy way.
The enforcer's eyes were on his mother now, but his mask was still in place. Monica picked at her nails, not wanting to make eye contact with any of her family members. John was shifting his weight nervously from foot to foot, feeling somewhat guilty for being privy to what he deemed a private family moment.
"We didn't tell her anything much," Monica finally spoke, as if hearing Jason's unasked question. "We told her that her name was Elizabeth I-Imogene Webber." Her voice trembled and Emily watched Jason's mask slip. "And that she was 24 years old. She didn't ask anything else, and I was glad. I didn't want – I didn't think I could do it. I didn't think I could tell her."
Her eyes, wet and helpless, met Jason's. Monica's lower lip trembled when she saw that her son's eyes mirrored her own. He could always pretend to be the cold, detached man that the rest of the town saw, but she had yet to tell him that it had never worked on her. She could see straight through him, straight through the cool and indifferent interior to the honest-to-goodness man inside, the man that was angry, hurt, sad, afraid, and heartbroken all at the same time. She knew she was one of the few people that would always see that when she looked at him.
"She was quiet when we ran all the tests. When she was back in her room, she went straight to sleep. I don't blame her – I'd want to go to sleep after all that, too." A sweep of golden hair fell in her face, a curtain shielding her pale eyes, and Monica wearily brushed it away. "I didn't think it would be so hard," she admitted softly on a voice that broke on the last word. "But I was watching her sleep, and I remembered when…I remembered when there was that blizzard. Emmy, do you remember?" She turned expectantly to her daughter and saw from the confused look in her eyes that she did not share the memory.
"There was a blizzard. Elizabeth was over at the house and she and Emily had been listening to music up in her room for hours. She was going to head home after dinner but it was pitch black and coming down hard and Edward told her to wait." Edward nodded softly in memory as Lila closed her eyes. It didn't take much effort on the old woman's part to see the scene as Monica was describing it.
"We thought it would get better. It didn't. So we asked her to stay the night, and she and Emily sat in the living room until odd hours of the night playing poker." A small smile kicked up the corner of Luke's mouth. Reginald, too, was smirking – he had been the one that taught Elizabeth to play in the first place. "We came down in the morning and the two of them were asleep on the floor by the fire."
Monica's smile was watery as she stared at her hands. "It was just like that when I was watching her today. She looked so peaceful. So…young."
AJ rubbed his temples. Hard.
"She looked like she could get up at any moment and drag Emily off to Kelly's for some hot chocolate," Monica chuckled. It was a hollow sound. Emily looked at her father, then noticed that the spot next to him was empty: John had quietly excused himself and left. "That's what I want more than anything. I don't want her to wake up again in that cold, white room – I don't want her waking up afraid and alone and with no idea of what's going on."
Monica had started to cry and, unable to see his wife in tears, Alan had moved to her side and wrapped his arms around her. "I don't want to see that again," she sobbed into her husband's broad shoulder. "I can't- I can't go through that again."
That was all Jason could take. The words had no sooner left his mother's mouth than Jason was on his feet and stumbling toward the door. He had it open in no time flat and soon found himself in the hallway. The lights were bright and the air conditioning was humming as Jason sucked in a cool breath. It was too much – too soon, too fast. A dozen thoughts tumbled through his head, each fighting to be at the forefront of his consciousness.
Stumbling under the barrage of thoughts, Jason made his way down the corridor. Johnny emerged from the bathroom, running his hand through his wild brown spikes, and at the first glance of his boss, one question formed on his lips and in his eyes. But Jason didn't have the answers to that question, so he quickly bypassed the bodyguard and ambled down the corridors that suddenly seemed smaller and darker.
Francis emerged from the nearby lounge with two cups of coffee and looked up as Johnny blew past, following his boss. Not one to stand idly by, Francis assumed the chase as well, still holding two cups of scalding brown liquid.
Jason nearly collided with an orderly but that didn't slow down his pace. The lights dimmed and his head swam as he did his best to put one foot in front of the other. A wooden door at the end of the hall was his beacon of light, the finish line. If he could make it there, he'd be okay. He'd be able to sit and get away from the choking heartbreak in that hospital room.
Johnny realized where his boss was headed and slowed to a stop. Hearing Francis picking up the pace behind him, Johnny cast his friend a look that had the bodyguard slowing down as well. They knew one thing – something had happened with Elizabeth. And whenever something happened to Elizabeth, Jason always ran off. Usually to save her. But this time, that wasn't an option. So he had headed to the one place in the hospital that offered any semblance to a sanctuary – the chapel. This time, it was to save himself.
Jason Morgan wasn't a religious man. He never had been and Johnny knew him well enough to know that he never would be. His retreat to the chapel didn't suggest any sudden faith in the Mover to see him through this. That wasn't how Jason Morgan saw the world. He lived by his own way and saw little to be gained from a life of blind faith. No, his faith was in his own abilities and his own intellect. His intellect, his sixth sense, his mind had been his saving grace. And now, Jason Morgan just needed some time to himself to think. To find his own grace.