Chapter 2

Its night in the magic shop and everyone it still asleep. Buffy starts to stir.

"Uh?" Buffy questioned as she awoke.

She went over to the light switch and turned it on; just then everyone else began to stir.

Xander was laid next to Willow on the floor. As we awoke he gave her a cheesy seductive grin.

"Hey."

"Hey?" Willow replied confused.

Anya and Giles are the next to awake. Giles lifts his head and notices he drooled on Anya and so he wipe it off. The couple both looked startled.

Anya stared at the old man behind her in confusion.

"Erm, hello?" the old man said half staring and half trying to wipe his glasses.

The young women in the corner also woke up. Tara looked around wondering where she was and who with.

Spike also awoke rolling off the glass counter, where he was quite content on for the past few hours, and made a loud bang whilst hitting the floor. He then stood up to see if anyone had noticed, it was too late. He had already waked the women lying on the floor.

Dawn woke with a fright feeling as if she knew no one in the room. They all looked familiar but for some reason Dawn could just not put her finger on where she had seen them before.

"Who are you people?" Dawn asked terrified. Buffy kneeled beside the terrified young women but all she did was move away.

"Don't worry."

"Please, please don't hurt me." Dawn said again shuffling away and up to the wall.

"Oh it's okay, I don't know anyone here either." Buffy replied to the girl who was obviously only a teen.

"Yeah? Who are you?"

"I, uh…"

"Okay who are you freaks?" Xander asked making a fool of himself.

"You don't know me?" Willow asked now on her feet.

"Not a clue." Panic still in his voice.

"But you were like, "oh hey"" Willow now imitating Xander.

"Yeah 'cause I thought you were a girl. And I'd remember..."

"I am a girl." Grabbing her breasts. "I'm not sure who I am exactly."

Giles gets up. "It's not just you? Does anyone remember anything?"

"Nope." Spike giving Giles a one word answer.

"Well maybe, we all got terribly drunk and this is some sort of, blackout." Giles said smiling at this stage.

"Um, I don't think I drink." Dawn said confused and dismissing Giles theory.

"I don't see any booze, I don't feel any head bumps, I don't see Drew Fuller." Said Anya.

"Who?"

"Okay, I'm not panicking, I'm not. I'm not. Stop looking at me like I'm panicking." Everyone stopped staring at Xander and turned their attention to Buffy who was trying to calm him down.

"Hey, hey take it easy, guy. Okay, no ones hurt right? And none of ur look all patchy murdery, so…. We're probably safe. Here. Wherever here is."

Everyone then began looking around and at shelves.

"Look at this stuff on these shelves. Weird jars with weird stuff." Willow then examined the jars more closely.

She went behind where Spike was stood and picked up a book. "Weird books with weird covers. Like, Magic for beginners. Oh."

"This is a magic shop. A, a, a real magic shop." Tara said looking amazed.

"Well that's it, maybe, maybe something magic happened."

Buffy pointed out that magic could have been a possibility.

"Magic!" Giles scoffed. "Magic's all balderdash and chicanery. I'm afraid we don't know a bloody thing. Except I seem to be British, and a man… with glasses. Well that narrows it down considerably."

"I don't like this." Dawn said to Buffy tearfully.

"It's okay, don't worry. We'll take care of each other." Buffy brushed back Dawns hair and Dawn smiled.

"Well when we get our memories back, we'll all be right as rain." Giles, now sounding positive.

"oh, listen to Mary Poppins. He's got his crust all stiff and upper with that Nancy boy accent." Everyone was looking at Spike. "You Englishmen are always so……" Spike paused.

"Bloody hell. Sodding, blimey, shagging, knickers, bollocks. Oh God, I'm English."

"Welcome to the Nancy tribe."

"You don't suppose you and I… we're not related are we?"

"There is a ruggedly handsome resemblance." Anya offered.

Giles smiled at Anya with pleasure.

"Well, you do inspire a, um. Sense of familiarity and… disappointment." Giles said to Spike.

Spike walked over to Giles, scowling as the pair looked at each other.

"Older brother?" Giles asked.

"Father." Spike scoffed. "God, how I must hate you."

"What did I do?"

"There's always something. And what's with the trollop?"

Spike, pointing at Anya.

"Hey!" Anya was now stood up trying to defend herself.

"Her?"

"I saw you two. Sleeping together." Spike argued.

"Resting together?" Giles was questioning.

"Look." Anya interrupted holding up her hand, sat an engagement ring. "It's okay, were engaged."

"Oh." Giles smiled.

"It's a lovely ring."

"Oh great. Tarty stepmon half old Daddy's age." Spike was obviously not happy with this.

"Tarty?" Anya questioned.

"Old? You little twerp I'm young enough to still get carded."

"Carded! Driver licenses! Willow interrupted the three arguing with a brilliant plan.

Everyone started to reach into their bags and pockets for I.D.

Xander was the first. Looking at his wallet he said,

"It's me! Alexander Harris. Cute picture, hey I exist.

"I'm Willow Rosenberg. Willow, funny name."

Tara hols up her I.D. "Tara, and look I'm a student at U.C Sunnydale."

"Hey, me too. Maybe we're study buddies." Willow said and Tara just smiled.

"I don't have a wallet." Dawn said looking at Buffy.

"Hey, me either. But look." Buffy reached for Dawn's necklace. "You're Dawn."

"Or Umad." Dawn and Buffy both shared a smile.

"I'm Rupert Giles."

"Rupert." Anya repeated smiling fondly.

"Rupert!" Spike laughed.

"You're not too old to put across my knee, you know, sunny." Spike was still giggling. "Anyway, what did I call you?"

"Um…." Spike started looking through his brown suit and found a label. He started to read it.

"Made with care for Randy." Spike paused and looked at Giles angrily. "Randy Giles? Why not just call me Horney Giles or desperate for a shag Giles. I knew there was some reason I hated you!"

"Randy's a family name. Undoubtedly."

Anya realises she has something around her neck, she take it and goes behind the cash register.

"Oh, hey I have a name on my jacket. Harris." Willow points out, whilst reading the white label with red lettering on her jacket.

"Harris? That's my last name. Maybe I have a brother and you go out with him. Or maybe you go out with me."

"Well, we did wake up all snuggley-wuggely. Maybe you're my boyfriend." Willow was now moving in closer to Xander.

"Either that, or I got one pissed off brother somewhere."

"I'm Anya!" Anya shouted over by the cash register.

"This key fits this lock. And um…. These papers say that Rupert and Anya own the shop together."

"This is 'our' magic shop? Well that's very, uh, progressive of me." Giles was walking over to Anya behind the cash register.

Dawn began talking to Buffy about the naming situation.

"So, you don't have a name?"

"Of course I do. I just don't happen to know it."

"You want me to name you?" Dawn was smiling now.

"Oh, that's sweet, but I think I can name myself. I'll name me….. Joan."

"Ugh!" Dawn pulled a face.

"Did you just 'ugh' my name?"

"No, I just mean. It's so blah. Joan?"

"I like it, I feel like a Joan."

"Fine, that's you're purgative." Dawn mocked.

"Prerogative." Joan corrected.

"Whatever Joan."

"Whatever Umad."

"boy you're a pain in the/boy your bossy!"

The pair said in unison.

They both then looked at each other in surprise.

"You think we're…"

"Sisters?"

They both smiled and hugged each other.

"You never show me affection like that."

Randy said sounding as if he and his father didn't have a close relationship at all.

Giles just looks confused.

"…..I'd wager"

"Well we need to figure out what's going on. We need to get help." Joan said taking charge.

"Looks like Joan fancies herself the boss." Randy mocked.

"We have a kid-"

"A Teenager." Dawn corrected Joan.

"A teenager and w have no idea what's wrong with us. I think a hospital's our best bet."

"Um, yes, let's, head out." Giles said whilst Anya was fiddling with his cloths.

All the gang started walking to the door.

"Any suggestions on how we gona get there?" Joan asked everybody.

"Dad's can drive. He's bound to have some classic mid-life crisis transport. Something red shinny, shaped like a penis." Randy said with his arm around his dad.

They all got to the front door and Joan opened it. Behind the door were the shark demon's vampire minions. Everyone screamed and Joan closed the door shut. Everyone scattered in all directions.