Thanks for the review, Codan. I hope this is quick enough, please don't kill me. And thank you Gaelle, I hope you enjoy this chapter as much as the last!I so appreciate happy reviewers!
Disclaimer: Don't own GW, nor the song. Both belong to respective owners, creators, writers. Sadness abounds. Hope ya enjoy!
Hearts Breaking Even
Duo stared across the table at Wufei. They both knew they needed to talk, but neither had a clue where to begin. Duo fiddled with his fingers, trying to calm his trembling hands. Man, he needed a drink. Wufei cleared his throat.
"Heero gets out of the hospital tomorrow."
"Yeah." It was an inane observation, the same as anything else they had said that week. They had pretty much avoided much conversation, keeping away from each other; but they couldn't keep going like that. Duo looked up to the ceiling. "Look, this was a mistake-"
Onyx eyes flared. "A mistake? That's a horrible way to refer to the best eight years of my life." Wufei reached for Duo's hands. "We used to be happy. What changed between us?"
Duo pulled from Wufei's grasp and went to the fridge. "It just fell apart, Fei. Things like this happen all the time."
"Not to us." Wufei whispered. "Something happened, and I need to know what so we can fix it. We can't just give up."
Duo grabbed a beer and downed half of it. "Maybe we should."
"How can you say that?" Wufei jumped from the table and grabbed the beer from Duo. "This doesn't solve anything!"
"I'm not looking for a solution!"
"I KNOW! That's the problem! You just keep running away. Why can't you just tell me what's wrong?"
Duo grabbed the beer back. "It's none of your business." He finished it and threw it away before grabbing another and heading to the living room. Wufei followed.
"If it isn't your lover's business, then whose business is it?"
Duo laughed mirthlessly. "Can you even still call us that? I don't even remember the last time we were together."
Wufei's head snapped as if he'd been punched and he dropped to the sofa. "It was four months ago. The night of Quatre's birthday party. We snuck up to the observation level of the office building and made love while looking up at the stars. Even then, there was something wrong. You seemed so agitated…" Wufei looked down to the floor. "But it was okay, because you were still with me, still looking for me to love you." The living room fell to silence as they both thought of that night. After several minutes, Wufei looked up. "You don't want me anymore, do you?" It was the hardest question he'd ever asked of someone.
Duo's back stiffened and he looked down into Wufei's eyes. "No." He turned and went to their bedroom and packed some things. Wufei didn't bother to stop him as he left. Why try? Why keep hoping for a love that was over? Duo was clear. He didn't love Wufei anymore.
It's a cold, cold, cold, cold night tonight
And I can't get you out of my mind
God knows I've tried
Did I throw away the best part of my life
When I cut you off, did I cut myself with the same damn knife
Hide my tears in the pouring rain, had my share of hurt and pain
Don't say my name, run away, 'cause it's all in vain
My hearts breaking even, now there's no use we even try
Hey I cried, yeah I lied, hell I almost died
Don't got a reason, lets just fold the cards and say good-bye
It's all right, just two hearts breaking even tonight
Duo sat at the bar, not even sure what city he was in, or state for that matter. He didn't really care. He'd just finished his third drink and started on his fourth when a drunk middle aged woman sat next to him, smiling with bright red lips that made her look like a clown. He gave her a flat stare before looking back over the counter.
"Hey, sweetheart. Are you looking for company?"
Duo turned clouded violet eyes back to her. "Do I look like I want company?"
"You just seemed sad. I could cheer you up."
Duo snorted. "Try someone else, lady. You're way too female for me." He turned back to his drink. Wufei's face flashed through his mind and an ache of loneliness stabbed through him. The Chinese man was all he wanted, all he'd ever needed. The two months since he'd been gone had only heightened his understanding that he needed Wufei. He knew the truth when he left. But he just couldn't bring himself to do it to him anymore. He killed Wufei a little more every day. He grew tired of watching those passionate eyes dim. He didn't want to see Wufei become as cold as he was.
It's been a long, long, long, long time
Since I've had your love here in my hands
We didn't understand it, couldn't understand it
But, nothing's fair in love and hate,
You lay it all down and walk away, before it's too late
We danced all night as the music played,
The sheets got tangled in the mess we made
There in the stains, we remain,
No one left to blame
My hearts breaking even, now there's no use we even try
Hey I cried, yeah I lied, hell I almost died
Don't got a reason, let's just fold the cards and say good-bye
It's all right, just two hearts breaking even tonight
Wufei tilted his glass of tea back and forth, watching as the dark brew swirled around the rim of the cup. Rain poured outside the window. On a Saturday like this, he and Duo used to just stay in bed all day. Cuddling and dozing as the TV played softly in the background. A sigh escaped him as he dropped his forehead to the table. Two months. The house they had bought together now seemed like a prison of silence and loneliness. He had decided to let Duo go. He knew it was the right thing to do. Then, why did it hurt so damn bad? Why was his heart crashing with the pain of missing someone who didn't care anymore?
The sound of the cup shattering against the wall startled Wufei, as if he didn't realize he'd thrown it until the noise woke him up. Why did it hurt so bad? Because he still cared. Because even with the problems, he still wanted to wake up with Duo in his arms. He loved him. He wanted him. When the braided man hurt, he wanted to be the salve to heal the wounds. When Duo cried, he wanted to wipe away those tears. But if Duo was gone, how could he do those things?
Wufei grabbed the phone on a whim of desperation and dialed Duo's cell. After several rings a wary voice picked up.
"Fei?"
Onyx eyes closed. "Duo."
"Why are you calling?"
Wufei ran his hand through his hair. "Come home, Duo."
He heard a grunt. "Fei, what's the point? We can't be together anymore."
"But why? I don't understand. Tell me what I did wrong, and I'll fix it. Tell me where I failed you and I'll try harder."
There was a short laugh that sounded more like a sob. "It isn't you. You didn't do anything wrong."
Wufei groaned. "Then what's the problem? We can work through this, Baby. Whatever you need-"
"No! Just let it go, Chang. It's over."
The line went dead and Wufei stared at the receiver. Chang. Duo had never called him by his last name. It was 'Wuffers' or 'Wuman' or something equally ridiculous until they got together. And then it was 'Fei'. Although he'd never said so, Wufei had loved to hear Duo call him that. It had always sounded so personal, so loving. Now it rang cold in his ears.
Go on, get on with your life, Yeah – I'll get on with mine
Broken hearts can't call the cops, yeah, it's the perfect crime
Twisting and turning the night keeps me yearning
I'm burning alive
I'm paying the price again
But I'll see the light again
Wufei pushed from the table and cleaned up the broken ceramic on the floor. Fine then. He would move on. He'd pick up the broken pieces of his life just as he cleaned up the tea cup. As he threw it in the trash, he smirked. That's probably where he'd end up, too. It had taken him and Duo a long time to get together, both had been so scared of that level of commitment. Trusting another person with your heart was a lot harder and frightening than facing thirty armed soldiers with nothing but your bare hands. But they had done it, and after so many years, Wufei had been so sure they'd made the right decision.
Now, he remembered full well why he had been so tentative in the first place. Well, he'd never make that mistake again. A knock came to the door as he finished cleaning the tea off the floor. He answered it and allowed Heero into the apartment.
"What brings you here?"
Heero sat on the coffee table and settled Wufei on the couch in front of him. "You look awful."
Wufei looked away. "It's really over, Heero."
"What?"
"I called him… I give up, Heero."
Heero shook his head. "Wufei, I just found out some disturbing information. I think you need to hear it."
My hearts breaking even, now there's no use we even try
Hey I cried, yeah I lied, hell I almost died
Don't got a reason, let's just fold the cards and say good-bye
It's all right, just two hearts breaking even tonight
Tbc…