Disclaimer: I own nothing but my own OCs and storylines…

She Will Be Loved

Chapter 28: Just Friends

By Love Ink

Angela watched as people started bringing out sleeping bags and air mattresses, a sense of dread filling her; she'd hoped they'd be able to go home. She didn't want to stay overnight and absolutely did not want to sleep on the disgusting clubhouse floor. The place was starting to feel a bit claustrophobic. Seeking to get away from the crowded front room, she wandered down the main hallway, stopping by a ladder she assumed led to the roof. Curiously, she climbed the ladder, opening the latch door, and pulling herself up onto the roof. She breathed in deeply, enjoying the fresh air away from the cloud of cigarette smoke that seemed to permanently hang over the inside of the clubhouse. It felt good to be outside underneath the stars, a slight breeze making it just the perfect temperature.

She sat on one of the vent boxes just as her phone buzzed in her pocket. It was a text from Esai that read, "I'm good. Stay there. Stay safe. Te amo." (I love you)

Worry twisted in her stomach. If Esai was telling her to stay at the SAMCRO clubhouse so she'd be safe, it had to mean there was some serious danger going on. She let out a long sigh, letting her head fall back. She stared at the night sky trying to find constellations despite the bright lights around the compound.

She was so focused she didn't hear the little door open, didn't notice someone had joined her until a voice said, "Want a toke?"

She startled a bit, lowering her gaze to find Jax standing there, a joint between his lips. What the hell did he want? Hadn't he gotten the hint when she'd blown him off the first time? Still...she was stressed and anxious, some weed sounded really good at the moment. She sat up a bit and shrugged. "Sure."

He sat next to her, just a little too close for comfort. She scooted over a bit to put a little space between them. He lit up the joint, took a long drag, and passed it to her. The smoke hung in the air around his face as he blew it out. "How you likin' the lock down?"

"Sucks," she answered honestly as she took a toke. "Everyone I know is busy, besides Kenny. Who's like eight."

Jax chuckled, shaking his head at her. "Good kid, though. My best friend's son."

"No shit? Where's he at? Don't think I met him yet."

"Nah, Ope's in prison. Got caught for some stupid shit."

Angela frowned, feeling incredibly bad for the sweet kid she'd just been hanging out with. She knew firsthand what it felt like when family went inside. When Happy had gone to prison, her whole world was turned upside down. If it wasn't for Esai and his family, she wasn't sure she would've survived it. "That sucks."

He nodded in response, taking another long pull of the joint. "Yep."

"Surprised you're here. Shouldn't you be out doin' outlaw shit?"

He chuckled at her, shaking his head. "Did my shit. Came back."

"Hmm. Came back and decided to talk to me?" she asked suspiciously. "There's a lot of Croweaters inside, y'know."

"Don't flatter yourself. This is my spot. Had no idea you were up here," he stated on a snort. Angela wasn't at all offended by his comment. In fact, it made her feel a hell of a lot more comfortable around him. He flicked the ash off of the joint and handed it to her. "Plus, I think Juice would shit his pants if I tried to get into yours."

She scowled at him, wondering when people would stop trying to pair her with Juice. He wasn't interested in her. "Nah, we're just friends."

"Yeah, okay," Jax drawled sarcastically.

"He's a prospect. He's got more than enough to worry about," she said, messing with her ring. "And you? Surprised no woman has snapped you up yet."

A sad look crossed his face as he looked down at his white Jordans. "Yeah," he said on a soft laugh. "Not the relationship type."

Angela got a sense there was something he wasn't telling her, but she didn't really blame him. They'd just met; she really didn't expect the biker boy to spill his heart out to her. "Hmm," she hummed, enjoying the buzz of the weed. "If I asked you why we were in lock down, would you tell me?"

"Nope," he said, his lips popping over the 'p'. "It'll be fine, though. We got this shit handled."

"Okay," she said, bobbing her head. She appreciated his honesty, his reassurance.

Jax's blue eyes looked out into the distance, seemingly past the compound and over the small town. He was quiet for a long moment before he said, "Do you miss living in New York? That city's a big change from here. Can't imagine how boring this place must seem in comparison. Must feel...suffocating."

Angela wondered where the question had come from and thought about just how honest she wanted to be with him. "I um...New York was exciting and fun when I had someone to enjoy it with. I...I didn't have a lot of friends there. Just Juice a-and my boyfriend. All my friends were their friends. When Juice left and my boyfriend...died, it just felt really lonely and sad," she explained, the weed paired with the couple of beers she'd had in the clubhouse making her admit to more than she otherwise would have. "Charming is close to my family. To Hap and Koz and Juice and...and all of my high school friends. It's not suffocating to me. Moving here...for the first time, I feel like I can finally breathe."

Jax regarded her with surprise. "That was...really honest."

She shrugged a shoulder. "You asked."

He inhaled deeply, clearing his throat. "There was this girl I really cared about back in high school. Keep saying it was this puppy love bull shit, but I don't think it was," he admitted, looking down at his hands. "Think I really loved her."

Angela was just as surprised by his confession as he had been about hers. She didn't call him on it, though. If he wanted to talk, she'd let him. In all honesty, she was kind of intrigued. "What happened to her?"

"She left to go to college. Thought Charming was too small. Wanted to grow, head to a bigger city, get her degree, and I...couldn't go with her. She wanted me to, but...there was nothing for me where she was going."

Angela thought back to her relationship with Esai. She'd been forced to do the same thing to him. Left him and hadn't turned back. But she'd been forced by Happy to get out. Had never once asked Esai to go with her. It hadn't been her choice originally, though she was thankful it worked out in the end. It sounded like Jax's girl had made a choice, had asked him to go with her, and he'd hadn't. Poor guy probably had his own regrets. "So you stayed."

He nodded, looking out over the SAMCRO compound. "I was almost fully patched. My old man was the founder of all this. It's in my blood."

"Where'd she go?"

"Fuckin' San Diego. 's not even that far, but...she didn't want anything more to do with Charming. She wanted to leave this whole town behind. Me included if I didn't go with her."

"That sucks."

He nodded, taking a long drag off the joint and exhaling it. "Yeah," he rasped, scratching at his eyebrow. "But I'm done with that. Tara's not comin' back, so I'm movin' on."

Angela smirked. "Moving on and having sex with all the sweetbutts?"

"Yeah," he said on a chuckle. "Somethin' like that."

"It help?"

He snorted and shook his head. "Nah, but its better than nothing. Makes me feel less..."

"Alone?" she filled in, knowing exactly how he felt. While she hadn't been sleeping with men to rid herself of the loneliness she'd felt after losing Raj, she'd jumped right into a relationship with Esai. It was the same idea, but different way of doing it. "I get it. I mean, I'm not about to go on a fuck-spree, 'cause that ain't my style, but I can see where it would make you feel less alone."

"Yeah? What about Juice? He'd help you feel less alone."

Angela shook her head slowly. "Juice is having fun with the sweetbutts. He's not interested in me. We're friends. Best friends. That's it."

Jax contemplated her words for a moment. "If you say so." He rubbed a hand over his face, chuckling to himself. "Man, I really didn't think this was going to end with a heart to heart."

"Must be the weed," she mused, enjoying the buzz she got from it. "How'd you think it was going to end?"

"Thought you'da left the second you saw me," he admitted with a smirk. "Got the feelin' you didn't like me too much."

She laughed lightly and shrugged a shoulder. "I got the feeling you were one of those self-centered assholes who believed he was God's gift to woman kind and were usin' that charm of yours to try to get into my pants," she explained honestly.

"You ain't wrong," he said on a chuckle. "But I know better than to do shit with Hap's cousin. Don't want to get on that guy's bad side."

Angela smirked, bobbing her head. "Smarter than you look."

He nudged her arm with his, scowling at her. "Asshole," he muttered, a small smile on his face. There was a loud whistle from the center of the parking lot. He looked down to see Chibs standing there, gesturing him to come down. He handed her the end of the joint. "Gotta go. I'll let you finish this. Nice chattin' with you, Ang."

"Thanks," she said, nodding to him. "And that girl that left? It probably hurt her just as much as it hurt you. But you can move past it. Give someone else a chance. An actual relationship might make you feel a hell of a lot less lonely than running through sweetbutts."

Jax nodded slowly. "I'll keep that in mind," he said, squeezing her shoulder as he stood. "See you around, Angie."

"See ya," she replied, saluting him as she brought the joint back to her lips. She watched him disappear through the small door and chuckled to herself; she hadn't been fair with her initial judgement of him. Yes, Jax was just as arrogant and cocky as she'd originally thought, but he was also seemed to be a deep thinker and way more in touch with his emotions than anyone would give him credit for. It seemed as though they had a lot more in common than she'd originally thought.

Juice watched Angela climb down the ladder that led to the roof not long after Jax had. Had they been up there together? What had they been doing? Had she fallen for his charms like every other girl he seemed to turn them on? She didn't look any different. Her hair was still in fashioned in its neat braid, her clothes were all in place, no visible hickies, or flush to her cheeks. His eyes landed on her lips, feeling a wave of heat wash over him. They didn't look swollen, just soft and smooth...lips he'd fantasized about kissing so many times. Her dark eyes fell on him, looking slightly red and heavy-lidded; she was high. He couldn't help but stare at her. She was beautiful, all relaxed and happy. "Hey you," she greeted, with a small smirk.

"Where'd you go?"

She looked at the ladder before looking back at him. "Needed some air. Guess I crashed your boy, Jax's, spot 'cause he went up there too. He's got some grade-A grass."

"What is it with you and roofs? Here, New York? Seems like you always find a way on top of things," he commented. She raised an eyebrow at him, and he realized what he'd just said. "Shit...I didn't mean...sexually just..."

"I get it, goof," she assured him with a big grin. "I like being up high. Above things. It's quieter there. Makes it easier to think."

Juice nodded slowly; he was dying to ask what they'd talked about, but had a feeling she wouldn't tell him. "I get that. Hap was lookin' for you. He 'n' Koz left already but..."

"You know where they're going?"

"No. That's above my pay grade," he said, shoving his hands in his pockets. "My guess is somewhere between here and Oakland."

She sighed, suddenly looking very tired. "Great."

"Want to watch a movie or somethin'? I'm sure there's a dorm room we can commandeer, 'n' I got my laptop."

"What about your prospect duties?" she asked, folding her arms over her chest and eyeing him warily.

Juice shrugged a shoulder. "I'm on break for now. Gemma said to get a nap in, so I don't crash later, but I don't think I could sleep anyway."

A relieved smile spread across Angela's face as she nodded. "Sure, goofy. Sounds great."

They didn't find a dorm room to steal, instead ending up in the makeshift gym on an air mattress pushed into a corner. Juice didn't really mind, though. He had a feeling no one would be busting in to disturb them in the gym of all places. They sat beside each other with their backs against the well, legs across the bed. He was aware of how close she was to him, could smell the scent of weed mixed with her shampoo that clung to her hair. It took all of his self-control not to lift his arm and move it around her shoulders. Instead, he dug into the pocket of his cut and took out a joint, lighting it up just to have something to do with his hands.

He could feel her dark eyes on him, waiting expectantly for him to hand it over to her. He shook his head and chuckled at the look of annoyance on her face. "You already smoked with Jax!"

"Oh come on! We both know you have better shit," she shot back with a scowl.

Juice chuckled, handing it over to her. "Fine, one hit, and that's it."

"Shut up. You finish that thing, and you'll be snoring in minutes and won't be ready for prospect duty when its your turn. I'm trying to help you out," she teased, elbowing him the ribs. She lay down, draping her legs over his and staring up at the ceiling. "Not feelin' a movie. Just talk to me."

He pushed her legs off of him and moved to lay down next to her. "What do you want to talk about?"

"I dunno," she sighed, turning her head to look at him. "Do you miss New York?"

The question caught him off guard. He hadn't thought of New York since she'd come back to California. Hadn't missed it either. The only time he found himself missing New York was when she was still there, and he'd missed her. "Not so much anymore. Do you?"

"Sometimes," she admitted. She was quiet a long moment, her eyes turned back on the ceiling. "I miss...Raj."

Juice could feel her sadness permeating through the small room. "He was a good guy."

"Yeah," she breathed, sniffling a bit. He turned his head to see a tear leak down the side of her face. He reached out his hand and wiped away her tear, wishing he could lean over and kiss it away instead. But it'd be wrong to take advantage of her now when she was vulnerable. She shook her head slowly, wiping at the other side of his face. "Shit. Sorry. I am way too high."

"Don't be sorry, Angel," he murmured, staring at the side of her face. She refused to look at him now, probably embarrassed by her own tears. "You guys were together for years. You're allowed to be upset and to cry and to hurt. I'd be surprised if you weren't hurting."

Angela swallowed hard, letting out a shaky breath. "I hate this. I hate this so much. He should be alive. We should either be together or broken up, whatever, but he should be alive."

Broken up. Those two words swirled around his head. Why did she think they'd be broken up? It didn't make sense. They were a strong unit. Had she been considering breaking up with him? He didn't know how to respond to that. What to say, what to do. "Yeah," he agreed softly for lack of a better thing to say.

"For the love of God, please distract me before I end up a hot mess," she said on a sad laugh.

"I uh...you'll never guess what I found in one of the dorms when I was cleaning..." he started, launching into a story about the time he accidentally stumbled upon Tig's drawer of sex toys. "I mean, I don't even know what some of that shit is for! He was so pissed he threatened to make me clean 'em!"

Angela's laughter made him feel triumphant. She'd been upset, and he'd gotten her to feel better. She let out a long, shaky breath. "Thank you."

I love you, he thought, wishing he could say it to her face. Just tell her how he felt and see what came of it. He couldn't bring himself to do it, though. Not when she was so sad. "No problem. Happy to share my traumatic experiences in the name of distraction."

"Goof!" she exclaimed, smacking his stomach gently. "Tell me another one."

Juice obliged her, feeling content when she tilted her head against his shoulder. He could've laid on the shitty air mattress in the middle of the smelly gym telling her stories forever.

Gemma couldn't find the stupid prospect anywhere. They needed him for a beer and toilet paper run, and despite looking in all the dorm rooms, she hadn't been able to find him. As a last ditch effort before sicking a patched brother after him, she checked the gym. The smell of weed filled her nose as she opened the door, paired along with the sound of loud snoring. It took her a minute to find the source of the noise, but when she did, she felt her cold heart warm just a bit.

Angela and Juice were passed out on an air mattress that had to be leaking air from somewhere since it center seemed to sag with their weight. Her head was on his chest, her hand laying over his heart. He had one arm wrapped around her back, hand on her shoulder, while the other was settled on her wrist, holding it to his chest. They both looked totally at peace and very young. They reminded her a bit of her and John Teller when they'd first started out. Dancing around each other. John hesitant to make his move because she was so much younger, and she teased him. Teased until he let her in. The rest was history.

She didn't understand why these two were dancing around each other now. Didn't understand where the hold up was. They didn't have an age gap like her and John or someone else in the way like her and Clay when they'd first started. There had to be something keeping them from making that next step. She knew Juice was oblivious and awkward, but Angela seemed to be intelligent enough. What was keeping her from telling him how she felt?

She cleared her throat, and Angela stirred just a bit, her cheek nuzzling against Juice's chest for a minute before her eyes opened slowly. It took her a minute to take in her surroundings before she sat up quickly. "Shit," she muttered, rubbing at her eyes. She searched the room for the source of the sound, her dark eyes widening when they fell on her. "Crap. Hi. Sorry. We were talkin' and just..."

"He's been workin' hard. Probably exhausted," Gemma said, folding her arms over her chest. "Probably why he hasn't woken up yet."

"He's a heavy sleeper," she commented as if she knew from experience. Gemma raised an eyebrow at her, and she blushed in response. "I mean...we do live together and when he falls asleep on the couch it...it's really hard to wake him up. Gotta like throw things at him."

Gemma smirked. "Uh-huh," she said in disbelief. "So wake him."

Angela reached over and non-too-gently shook his shoulder. "Juice. Wake up!"

He groaned, his hand coming to his face to rub at his eyes. "What happened?"

"Gemma needs you," she said, nodding towards the other woman.

Juice sat up quickly, almost smacking his forehead against Angela's in the process. She'd been prepared for it, though, and had leaned back just in time. "Shit! Sorry, Gemma. I didn't mean to fall asleep!"

"It's all right, baby. Need you to do a toilet paper and beer run," she commented, fighting the urge to laugh at Angela's crestfallen look. "Take your friend here along for the ride. I'm sure she'll be happy to get out."

He got to his feet slowly, stretching his arms over his head. "Sure thing. Wanna come, Angel?"

Angela nodded, reaching up her hand to him. He grabbed it, pulling her to her feet. He must've pulled too hard because she wound up almost flush against his chest. Gemma watched as they both hesitated, their lips just inches away from each other. She could see Angela's eyes dart to Juice's mouth, his gaze doing the same.

Gemma watched amused as they played the sweetest, most awkward round of chicken ever. "You gonna leave anytime soon?" she asked, diffusing the tension.

Angela pulled away with a blush, letting go of Juice's hand. Juice didn't move. He looked a little dazed himself. Gemma cleared her throat, and he sprang into action. "Right, right. Beer and toilet paper?"

"Please," Gemma replied, dangling the keys to the van from her fingers for him. "Take the van. I already called with an order, it should be waiting for you. Pick it up and come straight back. You hear me?"

Juice nodded quickly. "Will do. C'mon, Angel."

Angela followed after him, her cheeks still a bright pink. Gemma watched them leave with a smirk on her face as she followed behind slowly. Those two were made for each other. She could tell by the way they looked at each other, the way they touched. She didn't know much about the undertaker but from watching her interact with Kenny, she seemed to have a kind heart and if she was Happy's cousin, the girl had to be stronger than most. She'd be a good fit for the sweet, clumsy prospect. Give him the love he was so desperately seeking. Maybe they just needed a gentle push.

Looks like Gemma might be considering meddling a bit afterall... ;)

Let me know what you think about Angela and Jax's friendship. I always thought they'd have a good friendship if he hadn't been such as asshole towards the end. They're not going to be best friends, of course, but if y'all like it, I'll try to incorporate some more.