A/N: Here we go again! Ready for the second update! This chapter was fun to write, as it required a lot of foreshadowing about where the story will go. 90 of this chapter came about as I was typing, and led to A LOT of really interesting ideas, all of which I shall include (or I hope to).

I'm not sure If I can get this done for Christmas, but I'm going to do my best. I only have eight days or so to write this story, and that come out to be more than one chapter a day.

Anywayz, I'm sorry for the lack of other characters in this chapter. I really meant to include more of the ninja's interactions, but I came up with so many different ideas, that it was really hard to incorporate them all. I'll just cram them into later chapters. Yar.

Enjoy

Day Two--

"Irukaaaa-senseiiii! Buy me ramen!" A vixen-like grin was plastered on Naruto's childish face as he tugged on Iruka's scarf.

"Gak! Stop tugging!" Iruka snatched his scarf out of the boys clutches and rubbed his throat. "Naruto, it's barely eleven... I thought you wanted to buy a present for Sasuke?" Naruto looked at him, his smile no longer upon his mouth and instead lingering in his eyes with a hint of coyness.

"I know."

"And you just got up an hour ago!"

"Yeah..."

"It's cold!"

"And?" Iruka groaned to himself. He really didn't want the mutter the next phrase, but it was the only thing that could deter Naruto from ramen.

"--And Ichiraku's is closed for the holidays."

A small gap in the conversation before the silence was spilt in two.

"WHAT!" Iruka cringed, lifting a gloved hand to his freashly deaf ears. "Nooooooooo! Ichiraku... My ramen! WHY!"

"Because everyone needs a break from you sometimes, Usurotonkatchi." Naruto had been so caught up in his ramen pity-party, that he hadn't sensed the presence of a certain Uchiha boy, and nearly jumped out of his skin at the utterance of the voice.

"Sasuke-teme! Don't sneak up on me!" Sasuke cocked one eyebrow.

"I didn't." Naruto pointed an accusing finger at his rival.

"Don't lie! I know you were try--"

"Naruto, we've got shopping to do. If you don't mind, Ja Sasuke." Iruka promptly grabbed Naruto's collar and dragged him away.

Sasuke blinked twice, staring in the direction that the dobe and his old teacher went. No one had ever interrupted his bantering with Naruto. It was... unheard of. Sasuke wasn't able to see Naruto much as it was because as Jounin's, they had separate missions and separate lives. They were rarely paired up together for missions (seeing as the amount of strength the both of them had combined was more than a usual three-man Jounin cell, it wasn't necessary), and with conflicting schedules, sparring was a rare treat. A deep spring of irritation sprouted somewhere in the bowels of the ninja's mind, and from that spring came a fairly sinister (and fairly harmless) plot.

Iruka may want to watch his back for a while.

Yesterday, the shopping plaza had been open, and freezing. Today, it was warm, and a thick wooden dome surrounded the entire area. During the Christmas season, the Hokage would order a large encasement be constructed around the stores to attract customers. It truly wasn't the Godaime's idea (the elders made the decision), but she held jurisdiction over the affairs of ninjas who used the art of summoning wood, so construction was always swift, literally taking place overnight.

"What was that for!" Naruto growled, walking down the dirt pathway.

"Naruto, shops close early this time of year. We only have until two o'clock to find a gift." Naruto stared at him, wide-eyed.

"We only have THREE HOURS!" For the second time that day, Iruka found himself deaf in one ear.

"Yes. We would have had another two, but someone decided to take after Kakashi and show up late."

"Why is it MY fault! My stupid frog didn't croak this morning!" He huffed. Iruka gave him an amused look before pushing open a door to a nearby shop.

"I won't bother to ask..." He murmured to himself. A little bell placed above the door as they entered.

The shop's walls were completely covered from floor to ceiling with smooth metal objects. Weapons of every shape and size, with their freshly whetted edges just screaming to be plunged into some unsuspecting enemy. It was much warmer in here than it was in the outdoor corridor, probably because heat was radiating off of the coal fires stoked in the blacksmith's shop out back. It most certainly was the cause for the grime that seemed to cling to everything but the steel and silver creations.

"Nee... Iruka-sensei, why are we in a weapons shop?" Naruto asked with a curious air.

"Well, I really don't know much about Sasuke, and I thought this was a good place to start looking."

"Yeah, that's what I said last year when I got him those shuriken." He said looking around a bit.

"Well then, let's get him some more weapons." Iruka suggested, picking up a kunai with a hooked tip. Naruto just shook his head.

"No way. I mean, I would, but I don't ever give the same gift twice!" He folded his arms across his chest in a decisive manner. "Besides... Sasuke can buy just about anything he wants. Getting him something in Konoha is just... pointless."

"But you bought him--"

"Those came from the Lightning country! They were special!" Iruka sighed.

"Naruto," he began, peering at the Jounin through an inquisitive eye, "if Sasuke can buy anything he wants, then why are we shopping in Konoha for a gift?"

"I dunno. You dragged me here." Iruka's temple throbbed slightly.

"If you didn't want me to help you pick out a gift, then what did you want me to do?"

"Buy me ramen."

"How does that help?"

"I think better with ramen." Iruka's jaw became slack as he stared in disbelief.

"So you wanted me to help you brainstorm."

"Yeah!" He sighed.

"I'll never understand your logic."

"But it's not logical! It just... is!"

"Listen. I took the day off so I could help you go shopping, but I still have a mountain of papers to grade, and a practical exam to prepare for before Christmas break begins. Why don't you tell me what Sasuke likes, and I try to think of something later."

"What Sasuke likes?"

"Yes." Naruto's brow furrowed in thought. He didn't really know what Sasuke liked. Sure, he knew the boy's preferences on food, privacy, clothes, weapons, and jutsus, but when it came to hobbies, he was at a total loss.

"Umm.. he likes... Onigiri..? And Ninjitsu! Ohh! And he really, really likes teaberry gum!"

"You don't know, do you?" Naruto hung his head, a little embarrassed.

"Umm.. no. No, not really." Iruka rolled his eyes with a small smile.

"Alright. I'll try to think of something. I better be going then, Naruto. Ja!"

"Ja." Naruto waved. The bell sounded, and Iruka was gone.

It really bothered Naruto how he didn't know what Sasuke's hobbies were after five years, but he supposed it couldn't be helped. His rival was rather stoic and didn't make it a point to let everyone know about his interests. Naruto knew that from his personal experiences experimenting with Sasuke's privacy boundaries. That was a memory he really did not want to bring back up. He shuddered.

He's never been able to look at rubber duckies quite the same.

The only person who would ever know of any of the Uchiha's sources of amusement would be a stalker and who on earth would want to--

Sakura!

For a short while, Naruto had completely forgotten about Sasuke's throng of fangirls -- of which Sakura and her friend Ino, had been proud members. They'd have to know something, right!

------------

"Sakura? SAAA-KUUUU-RAAAAAA!" Naruto called through the open door of Sakura's house. He didn't dare go in as her parents were still wary of him.

"Where is she?"

"Oi! Naruto! Sakura's not home!" He turned around to find Ino and a blushing (or maybe it was just the cold, he never could tell with her) Hinata.

"Then why's her door open?"

"Her parents are preparing for a big Christmas party they're throwing on Christmas eve. Sakura went over to Lee's for the day."

"Ah." Naruto exhaled a frustrated breath. He definitely didn't want to interrupt Lee and Sakura during their "alone time", so he'd have to either ask tomorrow or find it himself.

"Sasuke troubles?" Ino asked him with a coy smirk. Hinata was wringing her fingers looking curiously at her female companion.

"D-did Naruto-k-kun and Sa-sasuke-kun fight a-again...?" She stuttered quietly.

"Something like that." Ino said, smiling wider.

"Ino! You were part of Sasuke's fan club a while ago, right?" She was a little surprised at this question. It wasn't one she had been expecting.

"Yeah. I was. Why?"

"Where can I find it?"

"Yeah... they meet at a small cabin about a half-mile behind the Uchiha estates. Why?"

"GOTTAGOEXPLAINLATERBYE!" Naruto shouted with a huge grin, and disappearing in a true ninja fashion.

"Umm... Ino-san? W-why does Naruto-k-kun want to g-go to Sasuke-kun's fan c-club?" Ino gave her a knowing look.

"You still have the hots for that boy?" It wasn't possible, but somehow, Hinata blushed harder.

"You may wanna give up on him while you still can, hun. That boy's taken." Hinata felt a forceful tug on her heart strings.

"O-oh.. I see..." Her eyes softened in defeat. She had lost him before she could ever have him. Ino put a reassuring hand on her shoulder.

"But, I do seem to recall a certain dog-boy and his puppy flirting with you yesterday at the plaza." She teased. Forgetting her minor pain, and getting caught up in embarrassment, Hinata's blush returned full force.

------------

It was quiet.

Too quiet.

To Naruto who was normally loud, the quiet was chilling and brought butterflies of anticipation to his stomach. He was hidden behind a large pile of snow set right beside the walkway into the Sasuke fanclub meeting house. He hollowed out a small hole to peer at the girls entering the building, checking for any signs of female ninjas. When he was sure that there wasn't any, he grinned.

Operation find-out-what-Sasuke-does-in-his-spare-time, start! Naruto thought to himself, stifling an impending cackle.

"Sexy no Jutsu!" He whispered, clapping his hands together in a kata seal, and releasing a large bout of smoke.

"Perfect." He purred in a voice several octaves higher than his own. He then proceeded to cast a small Genjutsu over his jacket, eyes, and whisker marks on his cheeks so no one could recognize him. He left the blonde pigtails, not really knowing what to do with them, and stood up on slender legs.

"Let's do this."

Sasuke stared at Naruto from his perch in a nearby tree. He had been following the dobe ever since he saw Naruto running at a breakneck speed towards his house, skirting it, then stopping here at the location of a fanclub he wasn't aware of. He made a small mental note to burn down the cabin once his fans had left for the day.

"What is that dobe doing?" Sasuke muttered under his breath, watching the female Naruto knock on the door and step inside. His heart crept up into his throat, its tempo already at an unbearable beat. Sasuke swallowed as the total surreal-ness of the situation set in. Naruto was posing as a girl to attend HIS fanclub's meeting! Doesn't that mean that there's hope for him? Like a swift and silent shadow, he leapt from the tree and slipped into position next to a window.

This should be interesting.

The brown haired girl who had answered the door ushered Naruto into one of the middle rows in what looked to be a small auditorium.

"The meeting will start soon ummm….?"

"Taruna!" Naruto beamed at the girl.

"Right. Taruna-chan! I'll introduce you and give you everything you need to get started Sasuke watching!" He kept smiling on the outside, but on the inside, he was a little nervous.

Sasuke watching? What the hell! His eyes darted left and right as the seats in all of the isles began to fill.

Can't back out now.

"I hereby call this meeting to order!" The president, a girl with long black hair tied behind her with a pink ribbon, was standing at the podium. Like all of the regular members, she was donning a dark blue shirt with Sasuke's picture on it, and a white skirt.

Talk about obsessed… Sasuke wore that kind of outfit when we were twelve! How long has he been stalked for! Naruto thought to himself.

"We have a new member today, let's all welcome Taruna!" The fangirls clapped and cheered and Naruto had to fight down a blush.

"Chelsea, would you please give Taruna her Sasuke watching kit?"

"Yes ma'am!" The girl, Chelsea, who seated Naruto handed him a large black bag with a modified heart-shaped Uchiha fan embroidered on the front.

"After the meeting, I'll brief you on your duties as a new recruit." Chelsea whispered. Naruto gulped, sat back in his chair, and prepared himself for the upcoming speech.

Twenty minutes later, the girls were mingling amongst themselves, chatting about their favorite subject - Sasuke.

"Alright! Let's get your started!" Chelsea took Naruto's bag from him and started pulling out the contents.

"This is your camera. It's wonderful for taking pictures in the dark, underwater, sandstorms, rainstorms, and it takes wonderful snapshots!"

WHAT THE HELL! He screamed inside his own head. He fought hard to keep his face straight.

"This is your Sasuke watcher notebook! This is where you record everything about Sasuke that you see him do or say. There are even blank pages to draw sketches of him! We have a monthly art contest to see who can capture Sasuke the best!"

Oh my god…..

"Here's your tape recorder, mini camcorder, headset, phone bugs - no one uses these -" Naruto was wondering if she was ever going to shut up when she pulled out the last and final item.

"-And this is your Sasuke handbook! Everything you want to know about Sasuke, including possible gift ideas! It is the Christmas season, you know! It's only appropriate that you get him something!"
"Ah! Thank you!" Naruto quickly shoved everything into the bag, and bolted out the door. Chelsea blinked a few times.
"Ummm..."

------------

Sasuke left the fanclub the instant Naruto had taken off. To say he was a little confused would be an understatement. Perhaps he should visit the dobe... no, he didn't have an excuse. It would look too suspicious.

"Uchiha-san." A tall Hyuuga boy said in a monotone voice. Sasuke looked up to find Neji leaning against his door.

"Hyuuga..." He said with a slight nod.

"Come with me. Tsunade-sama wishes to speak to you about a new mission."

"Hn." Sasuke nodded again, following Neji by rooftop to the Hokage tower.

------------

Naruto managed to make it all the way to his apartment before dropping the Genjutsu and changing back into his male form.

"This better be worth the effort..." he grumbled flipping open the book and scanning over the table of contents. Once he found the "Holiday Gift" listing (page 103), he turned to the section and began to read. The first holiday was Valentines day. One of the most important holidays for young girls in love.

Sasuke loves to get Valentine gifts! Milk chocolate with marshmallow filling are his favorite candies, though he also adores rainbow lollipops, and saltwater taffy. His favorite cake is Chocolate with fudge frosting, and the more effort you put into your gift, the more he appreciates it!

"What the hell!" Naruto swore. Sasuke didn't like milk chocolate with marshmallow! He liked basic bittersweet bars.

"Rainbow lollipops? Dude... that was a dare from Sakura... were they stalking us then! And Sasuke hates taffy! It sticks to his teeth and lingers there for days..."

Sasuke also loves it when girls confess to him! It makes him feel loved and special, and no matter how many confessions of love he receives, he never stops listening.

"Yeah right! He has to hide from those freakkin' girls all the time!"

Cards are also a wonderful gift. He always keeps them and has a whole box of valentines from girls all over the village stored under his bed!

"...the hell!"

But be on the lookout! Sasuke has been reportedly thinking of a certain someone in that special way! He even masturbates to pictures of them! Rumors state that his crush is a blonde, but that information is questionable. Everyone has a chance! Maybe you're his special person!

Naruto stared at the last paragraph.

"This is bullshit."

"What's bullshit?" A deep voice startled Naruto out of his 'reading trance'.

"SASUKE!" The blonde flushed a brilliant shade of magenta when Sasuke picked up the blue shirt with his picture on it.

"...Something you're not telling me, dobe?" He said with a smirk.

"Piss off, bastard." Naruto managed to hiss through his nervousness. "Do you always have to sneak up on me!" The raven boy just shrugged.

"You should be more alert." Naruto puffed out his cheeks in anger.

"You... you... ARRRGHHHH!" He screamed, not being able to think of a comeback to his rival's statement.

"Hn... Get ready to leave, Naruto." The jounin felt his anger leave him at the sound of his name.

"What? Why?"

"Tsunade gave us a mission."

------------

Vocab--

Ja - jah - A way of saying "later".