Authors Note: They say that art imitates life and I suppose that in most cases that would ring true. However, in my case since the day after Christmas I have found my life to somewhat been imitating my art.

On December 26, 2021, my mom who has cancer in both breasts and going through chemo treatments collapsed in our home. She has been in a location hospital ICU ever since then. To say that it has been difficult on our family, is an understatement, especially my Dad. As his daughter watching as he blames himself because he "didn't notice how sick she was" or "didn't make her go to the hospital sooner" it is excruciating. And anyone who knows my mom can attest to the fact that NO ONE could have made her go to the hospital when she didn't want to go anyways. The word "stubborn" doesn't even begin for cover it. {rolls eyes}

Please forgive me for not updating yet again. However, I would like to post a short chapter. This is not what I have originally had planned but it is something. Also please note that God is good, and my mom has started to get better. I will be working on this story on my free time and posting when I can. I am not sure when that will be now as my dad is needing help taking care of my mom. But the story will not be abandoned.

Thank you so much for all the love and support you have given me on this story. I can't express to you how much it means to me. Take care all of you. I promise to have the next full chapter up in its entirety as soon as possible. I just wanted you to have a little something for being so understanding with me.

I would also like to dedicate this chapter to my mom and dad my own personal Jackie and Hyde. They had me in 1979 (they were only 18 and 19) then married in 1981. Let's just say I was that baby that never was in my mind, lol.

Chapter Five – The Other Side by Ruelle

Hyde's P.O.V – January 3, 1980 – 5:22 PM

Hyde had no idea how long he had been standing there with his head press closely next to hers, his hand cupping her own, so that his thumb had was able to lightly brush the inside of her wrist the way he used to so many nights she had snuck over and slept with him in his room in the basement. His legs were beginning to ache, he really should get a chair from over by the wall to pull up so he could sit next to her. However, if he did that it would mean he would have to give up the way he was sort of holding her in his arms now, that was the last thing on the in the world he wanted to do.

Even the nurse when she had come in to check over some of Jackie's vitals had a remarked that was the best, she'd seen them since she'd come in, it had to mean something, right. Still, if he was being honest, he simply just didn't want to let her go because this was the closest, he'd come to holding he in his arms in close to a year now and he couldn't start making this about himself. He had promised himself, Brooke, Red, and most of all Jackie. She will always come first from now on no matter how uncomfortable it makes him, even if it kills him because it may mean one day, he must walk away from her since he is the source of her pain, he's promised.

"I love you, Doll. I promise I'm not leaving. I'm just going to get a chair to pull up next to you and grab your journal. I know you're probably going to be pretty ticked off at me, but I have been reading it a lot lately. I…just hold on I for once in my life have got a lot to say." Placing a kiss on her forehead Hyde couldn't help the chuckle that left him as he swore, he felt another twitch in her fingers again.

Pulling back, he smiled as he looked at her, he could see her, his Jackie in his mind's eye leg cocked back ready to kick him in the shin. Screaming at him in her harshest voice "Are you kidding me, Steven! Now! You wait until I in a freaking coma and you want to talk, seriously!" It was almost like her way of sending him a message of exactly what she was doing, without physically being able to do so. Afterall, if there was one thing the real Steven Hyde knew it was the real Jaquelin Burkhart.

"I know, I know. And I promise we will have these talks for real when you come back to me. But it's like… it's like I need practice, you know. I need to learn how to say this crap, no it's not crap, that's wrong. See what I mean." Hyde rubbed his nervous hands up and down the tops of his jean pant legs before he looked back to the chair again and that held her/his shirt, her/his journal and sunglasses. Quickly he trotted over, pulled all the items in the chair into one arm and then moved the chair with his other hand as close as he could to her bed. so that he was able to face her.

Taking a seat, he scooted to the edge, cleared he throat and attempted to begin again.

"I need to know how to tell you all this stuff, you know… how I feel and stuff. And not just the words I love you, Jackie. I mean talk about all the hard stuff too. I realize now that was all you ever asked from me, and you deserve that Jacks, you do. You always did. If I had figured that out…" No Hyde don't make this about you remember, this is about your Baby Doll and making it right for her, you must focus here. He reminded himself, then taking a deep breathe he quickly got his train of thought back on the right track. "I have to figure out how to do this for you now… otherwise, well then we'll just end hurting each again and I won't let the happen Doll."

"So, practice is key here because trust me when I say I don't ever want to let you go, never did. And after reading this what feels like 90 times, something tells me, you may never have wanted to let go of me either. Which reminds me I brought your Zeppelin t-shirt that way as soon as your able you can sleep in it again." Hyde gently laid the t-shirt and journal on the bed close to where Jackie's hips should be. Picking at the shirt a moment as he stared at the journal knowing what he wanted to talk to her about, but not knowing if he could find the words for it. Practice Hyde, you already warned her you needed practice. You must at least try to find the words.

"So, like I was saying about this talk we are going to have." Hyde began as he took her hand back into his only to be cut off by a voice he knew very well.

"Well, isn't that a shame your time for talking it done. Should have done that a long time ago before you kicked her to the curb for some blond stripper. I gave you the time I promise Kitty. You can go now. I'm back, I'll make sure she is taken care of." Red in all his protective fatherly glory, was standing there looking like an immovable force, arms crossed against his crest mostly likely in an effort to keep from beating him. The gang had always been quite dense as to why Red had fawned over Jackie so, Hyde knew. It was simple really, Jackie loved Red, truly loved him, spent time with him and in many ways reminded him a lot of Kitty too.

"Red, I know you're pissed at me. I'm not even going to claim you don't have every right to be, but we are not going to do this in front of Jackie." He stated as calmly as he could although he was half scared out of his mind at confronting Red and half fuming at the thought that Red thought, he could take her from him so quickly. Standing from his seat, Hyde brushed his fingers over Jackie hand one more time as if letting her know he would be right back, even if he didn't know that for sure, then turned and gestured for Red to step with him outside Jackie's door, then immediately Red lite into him.

"There was a time not so long ago I truly thought you had started to have your life on the right path. I actually believed all that time you and Jackie had been spending with Kitty and I, was teaching you, preparing you for the future the two of you were going to have together. Then at the first sign of trouble your dumb-ass went and threw it all away." Red unfurled his arms and placed his hands on his hips, making him look even more like the overbearing dad he now claimed himself as to be over Jackie.

"Red I…" Hyde attempted to begin only to be cut short rather swiftly.

"I'm not done yet dumb-ass. It was bad enough when I thought you'd walked on Jackie but to know now you'd done it while she was pregnant. Do you have any idea how badly I want to skip putting my foot in your ass and just beat the living day lights out of you?" Now that one hurt, it hurt bad and something inside snapped. He didn't know she was pregnant. He would have never walked away he had known she was, even Jackie knew that it was why she didn't tell him in the first place. Then there was the stupid motel and Kelso, and everything just spiraled after that. Didn't Red understand that?

"I walked in that motel with every intention to ask her to marry me and open the door to Kelso in a towel talking about people seeing them do it. I was pissed. Come on man, what would you have done?" Wait a minute, did that word vomit just come out of his mouth. Did all these excuses really matter anymore. Didn't he learn already all that crap had got to that point because he didn't communicate in the first place. Damn it, Hyde this is exactly the guy you are trying not to be. Hanging his head, he is already resigned as he listens to Red finish him off, because quite frankly he deserves it.

"First of all, I would have fought for the woman I loved, not ran off and licked my wounds like some pansy ass sissy. Secondly, I would have trusted Kitty enough to stay and get her side of the story because she is the woman I love, the one I am planning the on spending the rest of my life with, I would've trusted her and her side of the story, it's what's most important; not the idiot who had sent the better part of the last couple years trying to break up me and my woman because he's jealous I have her heart and he never did." There you have it folks, Red Forman just told him off, while calling him out on all his crap, behold the metaphorical foot-in-the-ass. Please note, it did not feel good. Hyde wonders for a second how long the man he has always looked up to had been holding all of that in.

"Red, I'm not trying to defend myself…." Wait a minute yes, for a second there yes, he had been trying to defend himself. Taking a deep breath Hyde sighed and started again, this time without any excuses. This time he did it right, like he was supposed to, he owned up to his mistakes.

"Look I'm messed up, epically. I am not even debating that with you. If we're being brutally honest with each other here I knew I screwed up long before any of this mess happened. I didn't know how to fix it, hell, I didn't think I could fix it, but I am trying now. I am trying, Red. If it will help my chances of you letting me in that room with her, I will lovingly let you beat living daylight out me. Please Red, whatever I need to do." He was real now with Red. Laying it all on the line. He knew he was begging, in a large room filled with nurses and doctors and even a few family members of other ICU patients, and if it got him access to Jackie or even a little lead way with Red that would one day get him access to Jackie it would be worth it. He wasn't lying to Red when he said he'd do whatever it took. This was the man he wanted to be for Jackie now. The one he would fight to be, the who would fight for her, like Red said.

"See now that is how you fight for the woman you love; you do whatever it takes. You never heard this from me, but that includes getting on your hands and knees and begging forgiveness when the time comes. You understand me. Nothing is more important than our women, especially our pride. Guess I should have taught you that lesson first." Hyde watched as the man who stood so tall and rigid just a moment ago deflated slightly and sighed as he bowed his head. Turned he opened the door to Jackie's room, taking a couple steps inside and Hyde promptly followed him in.

"So, does this mean I can stay with her?" Putting his hands in his pockets he waited what felt like forever as he watched Red take off his jacket and throw it in the other chair against the wall.

"Actually no, I am going to spend some time with her like I said. However, you have earned the right to come back. By the way, this is me giving your official notice of eviction. You have exactly 4 weeks to get out my house." Hyde wasn't shocked by the news; in fact, he had seen this one coming.

"You're moving Jackie in?"

"To think your teachers said you weren't a smart boy. I don't want her anywhere near that Fez moron. I'm telling you if I see him near her again, I am liable to kill him. I want her out of that apartment as fast as possible." Red confirmed in a matter-of-fact tone.

"That's a good idea. I don't think he had an ounce of remorse for the fact that he was watching her slowly kill herself and did absolutely nothing about it. Not to mention something inside me keeps telling me he was taking advantage of the situation. Which makes me just as liable as you to kill him, I literally had to walk away from him the night we all went over there to get her things." Hyde confessed thinking about the few times that night he had been tempted to clobber him, but he hadn't been lying about that either. If he had started Hyde wasn't all together sure he would have been able to stop, he might have just beat him to death. At the very least he'd be laying in a bed here in ICU with his Baby Doll and the last thing Hyde needed right now was to get arrested.

"That's not the only reason we've made this decision obviously but yes, Kitty is cleaning out Lori's old room right now as we speak. As for if Lori does happen to come back, she is going to need a place to sleep that is going to be your old room once you find a place. Also, I just don't think it's a good idea for the two of you to be living in the same place once she's out of here, and she's come's first Steven." Without any hesitation he was nodding in agreement with Red's last statement.

"No, I agree. Jackie comes first, I'll start packing tonight and looking for a place in the morning." Hyde had a few options in fact, he been talking to WB about a new business venture with his company as a talent scout in finding new bands to sign. Better money, more flexible hours, benefits, 401 k, all that grown up bull crap, and it's a job his thinks he would be good at and enjoy. Maybe his dad could help with the housing situation as well too. He'd have to give him a call tonight.

"Now those were all the right answers, there maybe hope for you yet. I will be here for the night shift. Kitty is coming in the morning. You better have good news when I get home and then you can come back tomorrow around noon. I'll let you say good-bye." With that he stepped out of the room again, and for that Hyde was grateful. Not wasting a second, he went straight over to her cradled her hand in his once again, place his forehead on the side of hers so that his lips were closer to her ear.

"I guess our talk is going to have to wait after all Doll and before you go and get ticked off at me, it's because your Papa Bear showed up and is kicking me out. So, not my fault. Oh, I am going to take your, well I suppose it's more of our journal and Zeppelin t-shirt, now. I'll wear while you can't get my smell back on it for you. I promise I will be back tomorrow afternoon; we will talk then. I love you, Baby Doll." Pressing one last kiss to her brow, this time he felt no movement from her hand and his heart broke a bit with each and every step he took away from her because deep inside he knew it was her way of asking him to stay.