The Trouble With Villains and Heroes
Written by Her Royal Highness Princess Kiela S., and the infamous Pirate Crisis Haylo.
Note from Kiela: Surprise! We'll be doing 'half' Chapters for every Chapter that we can think of things to mess up. Enjoy!
Reviewer responses by Crisis:
Mightierdandasword: Hee! I like your name thingy! Well, onto more serious matters. First of all this fanfic has the cartoon Teen Titans and NOT the comic book Teen Titans. Plus the show has evidence that the Robin in the show is indeed Dick Grayson. First evidence is with the episode where Star is sent to the future. Robin had become Nightwing. Does Tim become Nightwing? Noooo. Second evidence is the episode with Lary. No, seriously. Watch it. Plus, if you go to and look through the Teen Titans guide people point out the Dick/Tim Robin things.
Dooley: oh my go! here you go!
totallystellar: I'm not sure if you've even bothered to read our Notes? We (well, more like I) mentioned not to bother us about the pairings. Be mature please. If you have a problem with the couplings then simply click the back button. It's a wonderful and handy button.
ISC: Thanks, good that it draws your curiosity!
"": Thank you. I want your babies. Just kidding! Hope you enjoy this too! Whoo!
HyppolytaJones: Thank you so much for your patience, for it is now rewarded.
I-Shave-Clowns: The great detail is all thanks to Kiela. Go worship her now, or check out her solo account.
Raven Black-San: Well hope this one isn't too short, yeeh! Thank yous for your review!
The Trouble with Villains and Heroes:
Chapter 1.5, "Watch Them Get It Wrong! Part 1"
"TTwVaH Act 1, Scene 1, Take 1!" Snap
.
"Action!"
It was a typical day for the Titans, although there had been no fighting in a long while– several months, in fact. All five of the superheroes were taking advantage of the lull: Cyborg and Beast Boy were sitting on the crescent shaped sofa, playing some sort of cheap, generic fighting game, and Robin was sitting between them, watching them play– something that was undoubtedly dangerous, though that didn't seem to be an issue, for the moment. Raven was sitting on a separate couch, behind and slightly off to the side of the main seating area, reading a thick book. Starfire was practicing a traditional Tamaranian festival dance. Or, at least, she was trying to; she couldn't remember some of the more complex moves, and was trying to remember them by talking out loud to herself.
Suddenly, there was series of notes played at what seemed to be sonic volume, because of the mostly quiet goings ons, and each of the Titans stopped what they were doing to track down the source of the song, which was the 'I dream of Genie' theme. They found it when Raven guiltily pulled out a pink cell phone, and, coughing embarrassedly, said, "It was a gift," as she fought down a blush. The other four superheroes stared at her, slack jawed with disbelief, as she drifted out of the room to take the call.
"Cut!" shouted the director, and the screen obediently went dark.
"TTwVaH Act 1, Scene 2, Take 1!" Snap.
"Action!"
Robin was speeding along on the R-Cycle, and was almost to Dakota city, when the police radio wave scanner picked up an emergency call to all available units within the city limits. The message was distorted slightly by the distance, but the Boy Wonder was able to make out the words 'Bang Baby' and 'heist in– this kiss, this kiss. You can kiss me in the moonlight, on the rooftop under the stars'
"What the–?" Slamming on the breaks, Robin pulled the R-cycle to an abrupt stop in the middle of the unusually empty freeway. After a moment of examination, during which you could hear random people muttering in confusion, and a microphone dipped into the view, the caped boy determined the cause of problem: "Beast Boy messed with the wiring! I'm gonna kill him!" There was a sigh from off screen.
"Cut!"
"TTwVaH Act 1, Scene 2, Take 3!" Snap
.
"Action!"
All of the cruisers were suddenly enveloped by a white-purple light, and they jumped from the ground to hover a good distance above the street, which was understandably deserted. Robin traced the jagged line of crackling energy to its end, and found a sixteen-year-old boy, who was hovering above the ground by standing on top of a flat metal disk, which was charged with the same power that was holding up the cars. The electric powered teen had one gloved hand on his hip, while the other hand held the rope of energy that was connected to the police cruisers. "Yo, Hotstreak!" Static paused, a thoughtful expression on his face. ". . . . Weren't you fused with Ebon?" Hotstreak lowered his steaming hands, and turned eyes that gave off equal amounts of smoke towards the asphalt.
"Well, after we fell into the lake, we kinda broke up." Gear flew up from where he had been waiting for his cue.
"Dude, you two were an item?" he asked, looking genuinely curious.
"Yeah, but we were trying to keep it on the down low."
"Makes sense," said Static. Gear's expression turned contemplative, a perplexed frown now adorning his face.
". . . . How did that work when you were in the same body?" Hotstreak flushed angrily, and threw an extra large fireball at the two superheroes.
"That ain't none of your business!" he yelled, and let loose a much bigger barrage of flames. While the ensuing battle was going on, a whispered conversation could be heard, presumably between the director and one of the camera crew. It went something like this:
"Crisis, we should cut now. We only have a set amount of film to make this season."
"Who in their right mind would cut now? Think about the blackmail, Kiela!"
I know that! But this reel is almost entirely emp–!" The screen went dark, and then began to flicker a fuzzy, black speckled grey-white.
"TTwVaH Act 1, Scene 2, Take 4!" Snap.
"Action!"
Robin's hand went to his utility belt, as he launched himself out from behind his flimsy cover, and, as he rolled to a stop in a half crouch, a small red ball bounced to a spot between Hotstreak's feet– the older teen had stood back up, oozing liquid metal, to toss another barrage of fire balls at his two visible opponents– where it exploded, covering the easily angered boy with a thick white foam. The metahuman thief collapsed to his knees, groaning weakly, as the coolant took effect, neutralizing his powers with a triumphant hiss and billows of steam.
"Dude, Robin!" exclaimed Static, as he floated closer to the ground, and the other crime fighter. He paused as he got a clearer view of the caped boy, and, frowning in confusion, asked, "Did you do something to your hair? You look different that the last time I saw you." Robin shook his head.
"No, I didn't change my hair. The Robin you met before was the third one, Tim Drake."
"Uh. . . . Well, where's he?" questioned Static, as Gear drifted down to be at a more even level with the other two teens.
"And which Robin does that make you?" the helmeted boy asked.
"I'm the first one, Dick Grayson. And as for Tim. . . . He's with the Young Justice."
"The who?" asked Static and Gear, at the same time.
"The Young Justice. They're–" An empty water bottle flew out from the side of the screen, and hit Robin on the back of his head.
"Stop mixing medias! Cut!" came the director's shout, and the view went dark as the film was stopped from rolling any further.
"TTwVaH Act 1, Scene 3, Take 2!" Snap
.
"Action!"
"After you, good sir." said Static, in a surprisingly authentic sounding English accent, as he zapped open the door with a small burst of electricity, and gave an overly dramatic bow. Gear skated forward, pushing Robin through the door, which swung shut behind Static as he came in after them.
"Want me to take this for you?" Gear asked Robin, as he tugged gently on the edge of the other crime fighter's cape. He paused, and then smirked as he gave a slightly stronger pull on the stretchy material. Robin looked at the helmet wearing Bang Baby confusedly, and attempted to keep the scene running smoothly.
"Uh. . . . No thanks. Now, about the mission–" Gear snickered, breaking the Boy Wonder's train of thought. Another tug of his cape later, Robin was feeling a little weirded out. That was about the time that Static picked up on what his partner was doing, and came over to where the other two crime fighters were standing.
"How 'bout your mask?" the dark skinned teen asked, as he reached for it. Robin smacked his hand away.
"No." Gear and Static shared an understanding look, and then simultaneously tackled the other boy to the ground.
"I'll get his arms!" said Static.
"Hold him still! I can't get– oof! He kicked me!"
"Let go!" growled Robin, as he struggled to worm his arm free again.
"Not until we see what you look like under– ouch! Dude, I thought you said you'd get his arms!" Lots of snickering, and muffled laughs, could be heard from off screen, along with the occasional giggle.
"Static! Gear! Stop molesting Robin!" This shouted order was followed by the sound of several drinks being choked on or spit out, as the rest of the Titans, also off screen, registered the words. Robin made a strange choking noise, turning red, at about the same time several voices sent up a chorus of, "What!" that echoed off the walls of the set.
"Cut!" Yelled the director. Just before the film cut out, you could see Gear and Static letting a very traumatized looking Robin up off of the floor– the latter of the two metahumans looking pointedly at the first as he muttered, "Nah. He isn't my type."
"TTwVaH Act 1, Scene 3, Take 5!" Snap.
"Action!"
"Well, the mission is for me to– . . . ." Robin paused in his explanation, looking suspiciously between Gear and Static, half expecting them to interrupt him again. The two Bang Babies just stared back at him innocently.
"Come on, Robin. Just tell us already," Static urged him, as he pulled up a seat next to Gear, and slid his mask upward, taking it off. Robin looked around once more, at the surprisingly organized and technological room, before sitting as well.
"The mission. . . . is complicated. . . ." he said finally, with a sigh.
"How 'complicated' are we talking here? If this is going to take a long time, I'd like the short version first. I have to finish my latest experiment; it's a little unstable," Gear told the caped teen, who frowned a bit.
"I don't think that would work. You have to pay attention to the finer details of the mission specifications, or nothing will make much sense," Robin informed them, and then took a drink of the soda that Static had brought over for him.
"Don't worry," said Gear, "I'm good at multitasking." Static muttered something that the camera couldn't pick up, but, upon hearing it, Robin choked on his drink, turned red, and sprayed the soda across the table. The little droplets would have hit the two metahumans sitting across from him, if it hadn't been for the shield of electricity that Static put up in front of Gear and himself.
"I did not need to know that!' Robin shouted, and he stomped off of the set with his face flaming. Static and Gear cracked up, collapsing against the table as the other crime fighter disappeared from view.
There was a sigh, and then, "Cut!"
"TTwVaH Act 1, Scene 3, Take 8!" Snap
.
"Action!"
"Dude! It's not her fault!" he told Robin, as he sat up, nursing the bump on the back of his head, where his skull had made contact with the ground.
"Yeah, man. It was a three to one vote!" Cyborg cut in. "She just came along to keep BB out of trouble."
"Yes,' drawled Raven, her gravely voice holding a hint of playful amusement. "Because we all know what a short leash I have him on." Beast Boy flushed, and pulled the collar of his bodysuit up a little further. There was a moment of silence, as the other Titans, Static, and Gear took in what that meant, and then there was an eruption of noise.
"Dude!" exclaimed Cyborg, looking like he had just been hit in the face with a flying steamroller. Robin could only gawk, having been completely blindsided by this news. Starfire, however, was more that a little excited about the whole situation.
"Ah! So friends Beast Boy and Raven are to be married? Please, when is the wedding?" she asked cheerfully, looking for an answer in their red faces. At this point the two Bang Baby superheroes couldn't hold in their laughter a second longer, and they collapsed against each other as their amusement made itself known.
Two groans of frustration were heard from off screen; then came the shout of "Cut!" that preceded the end of the recording.
Ending Note from Kiela: Hopefully you all liked that, but even if you didn't, please leave a review. They inspire us to work (or so I say).
Kiela: Hey Crisis, what should I put for your Ending Note?
Crisis: Blah.
Kiela: . . . . Right. So should I put "Not applicable because Crisis is too lazy again?"
Crisis: I did give you an Ending Note! It was "blah!" Now be useful and write it down, chop chop!
Kiela: Oh, sure, now I'm the writing slave.
Crisis: You hog the story anyway.
Kiela: Hmmm. . . . You do have a point there.
Ending Note from Crisis: Blah.