ShouldBeInHollyWood: but I like cliffhangers. They're soooo much fun!
EternalGorithim: O really? Doncha hate that. I've had that prob b4. Except the site wouldn't even let me review at all. O and im still interested in ur penname if u want 2 try again.
OK this chap is intended 2 be just fun. No work no furthering of the story line, just nonsense. Srry if u don't like nonsense but I have a horse lesson 2day and I just can't keep my feet on the ground and so my ritin shall b as follows. Xan-man & Drew sillies so bware.
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Bad Ideas
Xander and Andrew stood outside Dawn's school, waiting for her to come out. Andrew shifted his feet and looked at Xander. "Hey, are we going to have to do this every day?" Xander shook his head, "No, school's out on Saturday and Sunday." Andrew glared at Xander, "I know that. Why do you always treat me like I'm an idiot?"
"Maybe because you are?"
"That is so not fair! You're just as stupid as I am."
"What! No way! I have at least twice your brains."
"Yah, but the ability to speak does not make you intelligent."
"What?"
"You know, Qui Gon, from Star Wars?"
"Duh, I know that, I meant why are you quoting that? I didn't say anything about talking."
"Yah, but I've always wanted to say that."
"Whatever, here comes Dawn."
"Where?"
"What are blind as well as stupid? Right there."
Dawn cut across the school lawn. "Hey guys!" Xander smiled at Dawn and took her bag, "Hey Dawn, you ready to go?" Dawn nodded her reply, and they all walked over to Xander's blue convertible.
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Dawn opened the apartment door and called into the dark interior, "Hey Buffy, Wilow, I'm home." Dawn walked into the living room to find Willow in the middle of a spell and Buffy reading a book. Buffy looked up and smiled at Dawn, "How was school?" Dawn shrugged, "Ok. Why are all the lights off?"
"Will's doing some kind of spell and one of the ingredients doesn't react well to light."
"Oh. What kind of spell?"
"I don't know, she didn't tell me. You got a lot of home work?" Buffy nodded at the messenger bag Dawn held. Which also happened to be bursting at the seems. Dawn looked down at the bag, "Oh yeah, Sister Joseph gave us a lot of English homework." Buffy lifted an eyebrow, "Sister Joseph? I didn't think guys could be nuns." Dawn rolled her eyes, "Buffy, guys cant be nuns. Nuns are named after saints. After they take their vows and do their novice time the get rebaptized or something like that and then they use the name of their favorite saint as their own."
"Oh."
"Yeah, I'm going to get started on my homework."
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Xander was taking his afternoon nap. He sprawled out over the couch, one arm and leg hanging off. A noise slightly resembling a jackhammer pounding on glass was coming out of his mouth. A polite person would say it was snoring, and regular person, like Andrew would say it was annoying. After they had dropped Dawn off at her apartment complex, they had gone home to theirs. And Xander had promptly whipped out on the couch. Andrew lay on the bed in the next room over with a pillow pulled tightly over his ears. It wasn't helping. Andrew lay listening to Xander for a moment before hurling his pillow at the wall. "WILL YOU SHUT UP!" Andrew bellowed at the wall. Xander ignored him, or maybe he just didn't hear him.
If, on that day, you were walking along the hallway that their apartment was on and paused by their door, you would have heard the sound of snoring. For a half an hour or more, then you would hear music at an earsplitting volume, and then silence, and finally the tortured screams of one sad little man.
And you would know, that it is never a good idea to interrupt Alexander Harris's afternoon nap.
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A smiling Xander closed Andrew's door and headed for the kitchen. A few minutes later a sulking Andrew opened his door and walked into the kitchen. He leaned against the kitchen doorway and crossed his arms. After a few minutes of silently watching Xander prepare their dinner, Andrew spoke. "You didn't have to that you know." Xander looked over at Andrew and grinned, "But you look good in a tutu." Andrew huffed, "No body looks good in a tutu, and especially not evil geniuses," Xander rolled his eyes and looked at Andrew, "I thought we already went over this, you're not an evil genious. I do not share rooms with evil geniuses. I kick their buts." Andrew smirked, "Don't you mean, 'you watch Buffy kick their buts'?" Xander waved a dismissing hand in the air, "Same difference."
"It is not!"
"Yes, it is."
"How can it be the same difference? Buffy's a girl."
"Look Tutu Boy, my apartment, my rules. And I say that it is the same difference."
Andrew stomped out of the kitchen and sat down on the couch. Xander fallowed him and stood in front of the couch looking at Andrew. Andrew glared at Xander, "This is so not fair. I get stuffed in a tutu just cuz I stood up for my rights." Xander snorted, "What rights?"
"The right to relax in peace, without being inteupted by the snoring of a large Albanian woman with severe body oder."
"Large Albanian wo… why you little… punk!"
"Is that all you can do? Call me a punk? Huh, no self respecting Albanian woman would resort to calling people punks. Even if she did have body oder."
"ARRGG!"
If after the screaming had stopped you had cared to stay around to see what else you could hear, you would have heard nothing. Until the screaming started again. Then you have heard it go on for a bout a minute, before the screaming was cut off. Causing you to suspect that the screamer had been either gagged or knocked out. And then you would know that it is never a good idea to call Alexander Harris a large Albanian woman with severe body oder.
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Dawn slammed her math books shut and walked back into the living room. Willow had finished her spell, and was cleaning up. "Hey, Will. What spell did you do?" Willow smiled at Dawn, "Not sure really, the text said something about sunshine and being happy." Willow suddenly stopped smiling, "Dawn, your hair." Dawn shifted nervously and raised a hand to her head, "What? What's wrong with my hair?" Willow frowned, "Nothing, I guess. But when did you decide to dye it yellow?" Dawn looked at Willow in confusion, "Yellow? I didn't dye my hair yellow. I haven't dyed my hair at all" Willow stared back at Dawn in horror, "My spell! It turned your hair yellow!"
"What!"
"Oh, no. Buffy's going to kill me."
"Buffy? You're worried about Buffy killing you? What about me? It's my hair!"
"Oh I'm sorry Dawn. I thought the spell would make it never rain on picnics, or make the day last longer. I didn't think it would turn peoples hair yellow. Wait! Is my hair yellow?"
Dawn shook her head, "No your hair's normal."
"Oh Dawnie I'm sorry. I'll call Giles and we'll start looking for a spell to change it back."
"Can't you do a reversal spell?"
Willow shook her head. "No, this magic is out of a really old book. Reversal spells don't work right on old spells. It would probably turn your hair green or something."
Dawn sat down in the easy chair. "Please hurry Willow. I don't want to go to school with yellow hair."
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Andrew stared at Xander in shock, "Mmmmfhm Mhhrmm hhmmmnn." Xander glanced over at him, "What was that Andrew? I cant hear you."
"Hmmff mmrrn mmma."
"What?"
"Hmmmff mmrrn mmma."
"What? Oh right, the gag." Xander reached over and ripped the strip of duct tape off Andrew's mouth.
"AHHH! That hurt you heartless moron. I think my lips are gone."
Xander rolled his eyes, "No your lips are still there. Now what were you trying to say earlier?"
Andrew shugged, "Oh nothing, just that your hair's yellow."
Xander's eyes widened, "What? My hair's yellow? Why didn't you say something earlier?"
"Hello, dumb guy! I had duct tape over my mouth remember?"
"Do you want me to put it back on?"
"NO! now will you please untie me, my arms hurt."
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OK my emphuria has faded. Now im just kinda bored. Please R&R! I hope yal njoyed the insanity.