Chapter 8

Her heels clacked against the courtyard's paved stone, one hand holding her violet gown so that it didn't drag behind her. Everyone else had a cloak or shawl to fend off the morning's chilly bite and normally Elsa would have worn one too just to blend in but not today. Today was her sister's wedding and she intended to enjoy it.

As such she ignored the stares and whispers that sprouted up at her passing, savoring the cool air around her before striding through the entrance of the castle.

The staff were abustle, making final preparations for the celebration later, moving tables towards the great hall or carrying ingredients to the kitchens. The feast wouldn't be until later that evening so they had all the time in the world. Even so, Lord Kai ran a tight ship as he stood at the base of the broad spiral stairs winding up through the heart of the castle, calling out orders to the masses.

Wading through to join him, Elsa surveyed the controlled chaos as she asked, "How are we looking, Lord Kai?"

"Marvelously, your majesty. I should say the same for you."

"Thank you. And the bride?"

She was hoping for an update but all she got was an apologetic shrug. "I haven't heard anything, your majesty."

"Really?" Is something wrong? Elsa had already been up since dawn to oversee things after another restless night. Normally she would have loved to spend the morning with Anna but there was just so much that had to be done so she was grateful when Kresta offered to help. That being said, surely they should have been done by now and there wasn't long before the wedding was supposed to start.

"I should go check on her. Make sure everything's okay. Keep up the good work," Elsa said as she turned away from the crowds.

As she began to climb the stairs, though, Lord Kai called after her. "Actually, your majesty, there was someone who was hoping to speak with you. A young woman. Ildoni, I suspect."

Pausing mid step, Elsa gave him a quizzical look. Really? Today of all days? "Did she say what she wanted?"

"I'm afraid not. She refused to speak with anyone but yourself."

"Undoubtedly one of Cyrus's lackeys," she muttered, glancing out over the crowd before shaking her head. "But unfortunately I simply don't have time for something like that today."

To her relief Lord Kai nodded sharply. "And I stated as such, your majesty. She agreed that it could wait."

"Good. I don't suppose you know her name."

"She declined to offer one."

Odd. "Very well. Let me know if anything else arises."

With that she promptly continued along the winding stair. A foreign representative probably couldn't be delayed for long but today Elsa had more pressing matters to attend to. Everything could wait for now.

Whilst the halls below were overwhelmed with commotion the royal wing was all but abandoned. Everyone was busy elsewhere, leaving only a pair of guards to oversee the stillness, and after weeks of chaos it was almost alien as she strode down the corridor. Soon enough the castle would return to its quiet self but for now Elsa almost found herself dreading the impending emptiness.

Coming to a halt before her sister's door, she knocked gently and only had to wait a moment before it opened to reveal Kresta.

"There you are," she said as she stepped out into the hall, closing the door to a crack as she did so. "We were wondering when you were going to show. And I have to say, Elsa, you look simply ravishing."

"Thank you, Kresta. I could say the same about you," Elsa replied, looking her over with a quick glance. With her olive skin and deep brunette hair Kresta was practically the opposite of Elsa's fair complexion but there was no denying that she looked amazing. Between the jade gown draped across her and the way her hair was swept back into a tousled yet elegant ponytail to highlight her jawline, she'd clearly come prepared for a wedding. So much so that Elsa nearly found herself admiring what lay beneath that silken fabric.

But as tempting as she looked, Kresta wasn't the one Elsa had come to see as she gestured towards the door behind her. "Is she almost ready?"

All Kresta said in response as she opened the door with a smile was, "Come see for yourself."

Elsa felt a slight unease as she entered but that vanished the moment she stepped into the room. There were a pair of handmaids who had been helping Kresta off to one side but she barely even noticed them. All she saw was her sister.

Seated on a stool before a full length mirror, Anna looked absolutely stunning. Clad entirely in white, she was wearing a flowing dress that was sleek from her shoulders before flaring out at the skirt. The only color came in the form of subtle violet irises embroidered just above the hem of that frilled skirt and her own copper hair, which was still a little damp from the bath she'd received earlier. Some embroidery decorated the bodice but otherwise the dress was simple, clean. Even her makeup had been kept light, allowing her natural beauty to shine through.

"Oh, Anna," Elsa breathed as she looked her over. "You look… gorgeous."

Looking up, Anna smiled slightly. She hadn't noticed Elsa enter but she did give a gracious nod. "Thank you." However, rather than giving in to an excited outburst or rattling off her anxieties all she did was return her attention to the world beyond her window, sitting in silence.

Anna's muted response managed to dispel some of Elsa's wonder as she gave Kresta a concerned glance and muttered, "Has she been this quiet all morning?"

"Kind of. We've just been assuming it's nerves. Today is a big day for her, after all," she whispered back. "Anyway, we were about to finish her hair and then she'll be ready."

"May I? Do her hair?" A ping of excitement sounded within Elsa at the prospect of a moment alone with Anna, along with the memory of a tradition long forgotten.

Given the gentle smile that Kresta offered her it was clear she knew exactly what Elsa wanted. "Of course. I'm sure there are some last minute preparations that the rest of us should be attending to anyway," she said, motioning for the maids to follow her.

They quickly filed out into the hall and Kresta gave her one last smile before quietly shutting the door behind her. Just like that, the sisters were alone together.

An instant silence fell over the room as Elsa turned back to her sister. Moments like this were few and far between so she didn't want to squander it. Anna, meanwhile, was still being unusually quiet, her eyes distant as she stared out the window.

Crossing the room softly, Elsa tenderly placed a hand on her shoulder, rousing Anna from her contemplation as she said, "Hey."

Looking up at her through the mirror, Anna gave a meek smile. "Hey."

"You look beautiful."

"I do, don't I?" As she said that, though, Anna gave her reflection a concerned glance. "It's not too much?"

The notion that her appearance was anything short of perfect almost made Elsa giggle as she shook her head. "Honestly, Anna, I wouldn't change a thing. You just look so amazing."

"So do you," Anna replied, although her wary expression refused to budge. "You're sure it's okay if I wear mom's wedding dress?"

"Of course. I know that she would have wanted you to wear it."

"But what about you?"

"I'll be fine. It's my fault for letting my younger sister get married before me." Accepting that Anna just wasn't in a chatty mood, she began sweeping her red hair back. "Now let's do something about that hair."

Just as she was going to create a brush, though, Elsa noticed an older one sitting on a table beside them. Made from little more than wood, it was a simple brush apart from a lavender flower painted onto its surface. But it meant more to Elsa than most of her possessions combined.

Gingerly taking it by the handle, she began to comb it through Anna's hair, slowly transforming it from an unruly briar to a silken cascade of fire. As she did so old memories continued to resurface from a time long ago. A time when she herself was a little girl, watching her mother tame Anna's hair and the song she used to sing to them.

She didn't even realize that she'd begun to hum it aloud until Anna perked up a little, her own hum joining Elsa's. Even though neither of them had heard it in years they both still knew it by heart as the tune drifted along, replacing the stillness with a familiar warmth. At the time they'd never understood the words that their mother sang in her native Manevan but that didn't matter. All that mattered was the love with which their mother sang to them, just as their grandmother had once sung to her.

That is, until the incident. Then all those moments became little more than memories.

But Elsa wasn't about to dwell on something like that, today of all days. Today was about her sister and she was determined to make it the greatest day possible.

That being said, there was still a faint mist in her eyes and a lump in her throat as the song drifted to its end and they both fell silent again. Humming it again almost made it feel like their mother was in the room with them and judging from the way that Anna's eyes had settled to the floor the feeling was mutual.

Not that Elsa was going to let her wallow as she continued to gently run the brush through Anna's hair. "Remember how mother would do this for us?"

Unfortunately, though, Anna was already sinking back into her thoughts, only offering a quiet, "Yeah."

With that Elsa found that she just couldn't dance around it all day. "Are you alright? I'll admit I expected laughing, maybe a little crying, but not quiet contemplation."

That finally managed to get through to her and for the first time a small smile crossed her lips as Anna looked up at her. "I'm fine. I just can't get over the fact that today's my wedding day. I've been dreaming about it since… well, forever and now that it's finally here the whole thing just feels so… surreal. Like I actually am living in a dream."

"Well I hope it's a good dream at least."

"The best." Then her eyes darkened as she gave Elsa a concerned look. "But if it were a dream, what comes next? What happens when I wake up?"

The notion actually left Elsa stunned for a moment as she focused on her work, fumbling with a loss for words. Not so long ago Anna would have dived headlong into marriage without a second thought and yet here she was, hesitating before taking the plunge. It spoke to how much she'd grown over the years and whilst Elsa wished she hadn't had to learn the hard way, she was still proud of the woman Anna was becoming.

But that didn't mean she couldn't offer a little comfort. "Who says you have to wake up? Why can't you just dream forever?"

That got a wistful sigh as Anna nodded. "Yeah. That sounds nice."

"So you're okay?"

Coming back from another distant state, she replied, "I'm just a little jittery is all. That's fine, right?"

"I'm pretty sure it's expected."

"Exactly. Every girl feels like this." That didn't stop Anna from taking another fretful glance at her appearance. "You promise it's not too much?"

"Honestly?" Elsa replied, thinking of an old portrait that had once hung in her room before she inherited it. "You look like Mother on her wedding day."

The way Anna's eyes lit up at the compliment tugged at Elsa's heart as she looked back at her reflection. "Really?"

"Really."

"Thanks. That… means a lot." Looking at nothing in particular, Anna heaved a sigh. "I miss them."

The lump in Elsa's throat only grew as she glanced at the brush in her hand. "So do I."

Anna didn't appear to hear her, however, as she drew in a shaky breath. "I just wish that they could be here. When I was younger I always imagined that mother would help me get ready and father would walk me down the aisle."

That comment hurt more than she realized as Elsa smothered a frown. What she wouldn't have given for their mother to be here in her place. For her to be the one looking after her daughter. And as for their father… he could be there too, she supposed. At the very least he deserved to attend his daughter's wedding.

Rather than saying any of this, though, all Elsa said was, "I know. But I also know that wherever they are they're proud of you."

That got another smile out of Anna as she reached back and gave Elsa's hand a squeeze. "And you."

With that she fell back into her quiet contemplation, if somewhat less nervous than before, leaving Elsa alone with her own thoughts. She wasn't entirely sure about that last part. After all, the strongest notion her father had pressed upon his own daughter was conceal, don't feel. To hide who she was forever lest the world find out. In fact he'd done such a good job of it that she found herself bound to it for years, even after his untimely passing.

Until, that is, she found a better way. And with that new way came the doubt. What if Elsa hadn't been made to imprison herself for years on end? Would she have been happier for it or would she still have been governed by fear? And if he could see her now would he approve of what she'd become? It was only recently, though, that she'd realized it wasn't just her own fear that enslaved her. There were even some days where she found herself wondering if they were more scared for her or of her.

"Okay, before I forget to do it later, there's something that I have to say."

Anna's sudden outburst yanked Elsa from her thoughts as she quickly replied, "And what would that be?"

She wasn't entirely sure what to expect but her stomach sank when Anna gave her a meaningful look through the mirror. "Thank you, Elsa."

Thank you? Don't thank me, Anna. Quietly, reluctantly, she asked, "For what?"

"For everything. For helping to make today a reality, for supporting Kristoff and I. For being my sister. I don't even know who I would be without-"

That was as far as she got before Elsa just had to cut her off. "Anna, stop. Please."

Confusion spread across Anna's face and she gave Elsa a concerned look. "Why?"

Now it was Elsa's turn to hesitate before the plunge. Her brushing crawled to a halt as her eyes drifted towards the strand of white running through Anna's hair. A single streak of silver in a world of red put there by her own hand in a moment that had changed everything. She'd already had a lifetime of trauma, from lost loved ones to bitter loneliness, but none of those compared to her regrets for Anna. All the times she'd knocked on Elsa's door only to be rejected, all the times she'd left Anna just as alone as she was…

But there was no point in avoiding it any longer. "Because. I was a terrible sister. Locking you out for most of my life and turning you away when you needed me most. I should have been there for you and I wasn't."

She'd thought and even hoped that finally getting it out there would make her feel better but all Elsa felt was foolish and ashamed. To her surprise, though, Anna was anything but.

"Hey. We both know you were only trying to protect me," she said, all of her anxiety melting into a soothed calm. Almost as if she'd been expecting this conversation for a long time.

Not that that helped Elsa much as she felt the guilt grow. "Still. I could have done more. I could have at least tried to be your sister."

But Anna would not be deterred, turning on the stool to face her. "And you were. Elsa, I don't know if you remember but you were terrified of hurting me. I just didn't realize it at the time."

"Of course I remember."

"Then what's there to feel sorry for? You were just trying to protect me." When none of that helped as much as it should have, Anna shocked Elsa even further. "And just so you know I don't blame you for a second."

"You don't?"

For years all Elsa had thought was that Anna hated her, and rightfully so. When she'd realized that just wasn't true it'd come as quite a shock but she wasn't sure if she could believe this latest remark.

However, Anna's eyes were as sincere as ever as she said, "How could I? Sure, I might have resented you a little but now I know better. And it doesn't hurt that you're doing so well."

"You think I'm doing well?"

"Obviously. Look at you. Two years ago you wouldn't have come anywhere near me. And now…" Gently taking the brush from her hands and setting it aside, Anna took both Elsa's hands in her own, holding them close. The first cracks of emotion were beginning to creep into her voice when she continued. "Now we can just be sisters like we used to. Now we'll never be alone again so long as we have each other."

Smiling, Elsa replied, "You mean you'll never be alone so long as you have Kristoff."

"And you Aaron."

Just like that all those warm feelings were sent scattering as Anna unwittingly blundered from one problem straight into another. However, Elsa was not going to be the one to bring her sister down on her wedding day with unnecessary drama.

"Exactly."

Even so, Anna being Anna just couldn't leave well enough alone as she turned back to the mirror. "Is everything okay between you two?"

"Of course," Elsa replied, taking care not to look at her as she began to weave Anna's hair into a braid. "Why do you ask?"

She didn't have to look to feel the concern radiating off of Anna as she said, "Because I know you better than anyone and lately things have seemed… I don't know, off. For over a year you and Aaron were head over heels in love but for the last few months you've looked stressed."

Accepting that ignoring it at this point would only make her worry more, Elsa tried to be tactful. "We're okay. It's just that reality has a way of catching up with us, you know?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well, think about it. When you first fall in love it's like you're dancing in the clouds. Everything is new and bright and it's all just so… magical." As she spoke Elsa found herself smiling fondly at the thought of those early memories, only for her smile to vanish once more at newer ones. "But sooner or later reality starts to creep back in until we're on the ground again. Which is fine. It's not like we could live in the clouds forever."

She didn't even realize she'd stopped braiding until Anna spoke up. "I suppose. But reality can be magical too, you know."

There'd always been an infectious quality to Anna's endless optimism as Elsa continued her work. "I know. There's just a certain melancholy to watching that first light fade."

"It's good that it fades. A candle that burns twice as bright fades twice as fast, after all. All that matters is that it keeps burning." Pausing, her concern peeked out again. "It is still burning, right?"

At last there was no question about that one. "Of course."

"Then what's the problem?"

So much for not talking about it. She was trying to ignore it but as much as she didn't like it Elsa had to admit Anna asked a good question. What was the problem? Life in the castle was certainly more complicated than that blissful time they'd shared alone in her palace high atop the lofty peak of the North Mountain but none of that had changed how Aaron felt about her. He'd given up everything just to follow her here and despite all the hardship he was still just as eager to be with her as ever.

For her part Elsa was just as ready to be his. Her life was naturally so stressful due to what lay on both the outside and the inside that some days it almost felt like too much, trying to reconcile her role as queen with the roiling forces lurking within her. On those days she was particularly grateful to have Aaron in her life. When she could just be held by him and listen as his soothing voice whispered in her ear the troubles of the world would drift away for one blissful moment. And that didn't even include what he was capable of stirring within her. In fact on a good day all Aaron had to do was look at her with those beckoning eyes of his to send her heart into a flurry. Not that she would ever admit such a thing to anyone, of course.

But lately things had begun to weigh more and more. As much as he would deny it she could tell that court life was beginning to get to Aaron and he was still just a lord. How much worse would it get if they made a leap of their own? However, even that was nothing compared to the unspoken dread he carried around within himself, a dread he would not speak of. If he could just find a way to move past it then perhaps she wouldn't have to...

"Let's just say his doubts feed my doubts," Elsa finally said, tying off the end of Anna's braid as she did so.

Anna had patiently waited for her to speak but still wasn't willing to let it go. "What doubts?"

"It's nothing," she replied before giving her a gentle, if chidding look to show that this topic was over. "And this is hardly appropriate talk right before a wedding."

"Have you talked to him about it?"

"Not in so many words, but we will. I promise. Now sit still so I can focus."

Despite her distance, though, Anna continued with one final thought. "It almost sounds like you wish you could just go back to where it all began."

That one thought was more appealing than anything but Elsa refused to let herself be seduced by it. She could hardly afford to dabble in fantasies, after all. "If only that were possible."

"You're the queen, Elsa. Anything's possible for you."

With that finally Anna let the subject drop as Elsa began to wind her hair into place, holding it together with a few well placed pins. She thought she would feel relieved to be past it but Anna's words only left her feeling even more torn. After all, she could do whatever she wanted and no one would dare refuse her. But that didn't mean that she could just neglect the duties that fate had placed upon her, no matter how much she might like to. Right?

As caught up in her own thoughts, though, Elsa soon realized that her sister was returning to another thoughtful funk of her own, her eyes growing distant once more as she sat there quietly. Too quietly.

"Now what?" Elsa asked, nearly rolling her eyes as she finished weaving Anna's hair into a braided bun.

"Hm?" Looking up, Anna shrugged. "Oh, it's nothing. I was just thinking about how I used to think that love was so easy. I would look at him and he'd look at me and love would take care of the rest. But true love just isn't like that."

As she said that last part her eyes took on an almost wistful quality as she gazed out the window. Once again her newfound maturity surprised Elsa and she felt herself compelled to ask a familiar question as she rested her hands on Anna's shoulders. "And what do you know about true love, Anna?"

That got a small smile out of Anna as she leaned back into the touch and looked back at her gown in the mirror. "Not much, honestly. But I do know a thing or two."

"Such as?"

It took another moment of contemplation for her to answer but when she did her words were more careful than Elsa had ever heard her. "Love is the most natural thing in the world, and yet it can also be so hard. And it can be terrifying. Putting your complete faith in someone, trusting them to always be there for you… but knowing you'll always be there for them, it's magical. Love may not be as easy as I once thought it was but I wouldn't give it up for anything in the world."

Elsa had hoped to save all the crying for later but that didn't stop her from tearing up a little again as she stepped around the stool and looked down at her little sister. "Okay, when did you get so wise and what happened to that little girl I once knew?"

Smiling softly, Anna smoothed out the front of her dress before finally standing to face her. "I'll always be that little girl at heart. I've just… learned a little along the way."

Standing there before her in that dress, gleaming with beauty, Elsa felt pride welling up within herself as she admired her sister. But as spectacular as Anna was as a woman all Elsa could think about was one cozy little afternoon spent together building a snowman. "Good. Just don't go learning too much. But enough of this sort of talk. It is your wedding day, after all."

"You're right. And I have to say, my hair's looking good," Anna replied, turning to admire Elsa's work in the mirror. "Looks like all that's missing is my veil."

As she spoke they both glanced at the piece of gossamer fabric waiting patiently on the table. Rather than taking it, though, Elsa anxiously recalled an idea she'd had the night before. "About that. I was thinking we could try something a little different."

"What did you have in mind?"

"It's easier if I show you. Let me know what you think."

With that she took a step away from Anna and slid one of her palms across the other. As she did so a shimmering mist appeared between her hands, fanning outward as she continued to stroke it out. The mist then gradually began to coalesce, condensing into a silken sheet of the most delicate ice she'd ever spun. This new veil twinkled as it hung from her hand, an intricate lacework woven throughout it that danced with the light that shined across it. It was only after it had reached the floor that Elsa stopped coaxing it along, holding it aloft for Anna to see.

All Anna could do was watch in awe as it materialized before her eyes, her hands clutched over her mouth. When Elsa looked at her she gave a choked whisper. "Oh Elsa. It's gorgeous."

"You like it?"

"I love it. Thank you so much."

"Then if you'll allow me." With that she stepped behind Anna and gently clasped it to her bun, wafting it out as she did so and allowing it to settle gracefully down across her dress. And just like that her look was complete. "Wow, Anna. You look perfect."

Apparently that was Anna's breaking point, with large tears beginning to pool in her eyes as she looked at her reflection. "I feel perfect."

Her voice was so tight that Elsa found herself giggling as she slipped a hand around her shoulder and held her close. "Now don't you start crying because if you do then we both know I'm going to."

"It's okay, I'm fine," Anna replied while waving her hands emphatically at her eyes. All the while she quietly muttered to herself, "I'm fine I'm fine I'm fine."

"Are you fine?"

At least Anna was able to laugh as she blinked the tears away, taking great care not to spoil what makeup she had. Just as she was about to turn towards the door, though, she hesitated. "Actually, I did forget one very important thing."

"What?" Elsa looked her over but couldn't see anything missing or out of place so she was that much more surprised when Anna suddenly turned towards her and wrapped her in a fierce hug.

"I love you, Elsa," she whispered, holding her close and resting her head on Elsa's shoulder.

Now it was Elsa's turn to fight back tears as she returned the embrace. For years she'd been so afraid just to touch her sister, so to be able to hold her... "I love you too, Anna."

They stood there in silence for a while, just savoring the moment before eventually breaking apart as Anna took a step back. "Alright. Let's go get me married."

Nodding, Elsa moved to help her with her dress whilst gesturing towards the door. "Then let's not keep Kristoff waiting any longer."