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Hey, sorry to say that this is the last chapter. I hope you all enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it. I would have posted it sooner, but the website wouldn't let me. Thanx for all the reviews and good words. I might write a sequel towards the end of summer where Mike runs into Helga again when she's a troubled teenager-if I have time.
Weeks turned into months and Logan was learning to adapt to his infant daughter. He didn't realize how much joy one baby could bring into his life. He looked back on his life of partying and wondered how he ever managed without her. Those things didn't seem so important now. Helga was discovering the world around her. She was growing right before his eyes. Each day brought something new. Mike made sure that the world she saw was perfect and good. He always had a cute or funny story to tell everyone at work. His eyes lit up when he mentioned her name. Barek noticed a change in him that she hadn't seen earlier. He seemed...happy, complete. Helga brought out the best in him - a good, loving, caring side. She knew that Helga was the one person that Mike would lay down his life for. He beamed with pride when she was around. Her smiles made him melt. She had him wrapped around her little finger. When he stopped bringing women home, she knew something had changed. Helga gave him hope, a purpose in life. She made him human.
One afternoon, Mike visited the station with Helga. She loved the attention she received and was all smiles. She always looked to make sure Mike was nearby. Mike had his feet propped on his desk telling a story about how Helga rolled over for the first time when a woman entered the room. She perused the area until her eyes rested upon Mike. She flattened out her already, neat lilac blouse and advanced towards him. An unsettling quietness filled the room. A few guys nudged each other as the woman passed by. Barek didn't like this at all. She felt a slap coming on.
If only it were that simple. That would have been a welcome sight compared to what happened next. She didn't introduce herself. She simply held out her hand and caressed Helga's cheek. "I see you've taken good care of her," she said in a calm voice. "I knew you would."
"Do I know you?" Mike asked suspiciously as he moved closer to Helga.
She gave him a half-smile. "Sort of."
He prompted her to go on. He honestly didn't know who she was. He racked his brain trying to figure out where he'd met her. He was a bit embarrassed that he couldn't recognize her. He had been slightly wild in the past, but surely he could recall someone that he was so...close with. Although, after many beers, he was close with lots of women. He used to boast about it, but not now.
She started to explain, but stopped. It really didn't matter. "My name is Sarah Beckham. I'm here to pick up my baby."
Mike raised his eyebrows and gave her a sideways glance. "What do you mean? You drop her off with strangers and without any explanation. You don't come around for months and all of a sudden, you want her back?"
"Yes, she's my child." Beckham held up her head.
"What was she a few months ago? You didn't care then," Mike spat. "Why now?"
Beckham didn't back down. "I had some personal problems...and now I'm better."
Mike wasn't buying it. "Just like that," he snapped his fingers, "the problems are gone and you are perfect."
"Not perfect, better. I can be a mother now," she claimed.
Mike had his suspicions and didn't really feel much sympathy for this Sarah Beckham. Who is she? How dare she drop off her kid. I'm not a daycare. You can't pick when you want to be a parent!
"Lady, that just isn't good enough. I don't even know you. For all I know, you want her back so you can sell her and score some drugs." He needed to stall her so he could run a background check on her. He wanted to know all about her. I'm not handing Helga over to her. How do we even know she's her mother?
"It's not a request, Logan." Beckham's tone turned threatening.
Mike had never been a person to handle threats very well. "Then you shouldn't have left her with me," he countered.
There was a brief silence as the two stared icily at each other. Helga began to cry. Propelled by instinct, Beckham started to go to the child to qualm her fears, but Mike blocked her path. "It's her feeding time so if you don't mind..." he stated coolly and waved her away.
He took her in his arms and held the bottle to her mouth that Barek heated up for him in the break room. She clamped on tight and sucked happily at the warm milk while playing with his shirt collar. He forgot the woman was there. Her presence was unimportant. Helga needed him and he was there for her - and he always would be.
Beckham wrung her hands and looked at them with envy. Mike shared a bond with her that she has missed out on. She might never share what they had. How she yearned to be a good mother. She'd been a failure, but she was ready to try. She deserved that chance. She was her mother; you couldn't just ignore that.
He burped Helga and sat her back in her carrier. He watched over her until she drifted off to sleep. Then, he was brought back to reality when he saw that Beckham hadn't left. "You're still here?"
"I'm not leaving without her," she said, determined.
Mike shrugged his shoulders. "Well, take a seat, get some coffee. You're going to be here a while." He motioned to a chair in the corner.
He walked over to a nearby computer to check out her story.
"She's not yours," Beckham blurted out.
He froze before he sat down. He slowly turned around. "What did you say?"
"She's not yours." She lowered her voice.
Mike was in a daze. He felt like he was in a nightmare waiting to wake up, but couldn't. This can't be happening! Wake up, Mike! Wake up! He felt dizzy and needed to sit down. "Why would you say...do something like this?"
Beckham's anger turned to shame. She didn't want it to go this far. She just wanted to pick up her child and leave. Go far away. Start over. What could she possibly say to make it better? The truth was all she had. Mike deserved the truth. He had taken such good care of her child. It was the least she could do.
"It happened months ago. I was dating your friend, Steve. We drank too much one night...and well, you know the rest." She paused to gather her wits and forged on. "We hadn't been dating long, just a few dinners and Steve was in no way ready to be a father. We both knew that. I was in no shape to be a mother - a mother she deserved. I was drinking heavily, among other drugs. I just couldn't handle it."
"Why me? Why bring her to me?" Mike demanded an answer.
"Although we only met once, I knew you were a good person by the way Steve talked about you. I just knew you would watch over her. You have your faults, but who am I to judge? You were the best choice. It may not sound logical to you, but it was to me at that time."
Mike's head was spinning. He didn't know what to say. He wanted this whole mess to be over so he could take her home. "You can't just leave a kid and come back when you feel like it. It's not fair to her. She needs someone who will stay with her, not leave when it gets a little tough. How do I know you won't do it again?" Mike asked warily.
"You don't," she stated softly, "and it's not your problem. I'm sorry I brought you into this. Please give me my child and we'll get out of your life."
Logan tried to swallow the lump in his throat. It tightened to where he could hardly breathe. Being a detective, he already resigned to the fact that he didn't have a chance. They were almost always returned to their mothers -even the bad ones. He wanted to strangle Steve. He'd seen him a few times at the bar and Steve never mentioned the woman, child, or the fact that Mike was taking care of her for him. He vaguely remembered Steve introducing Beckham to him once, but he never saw her again.
What a loser. He can't even take care of his own child. I can't believe I hung out with that jerk.
He did the only thing he could do. He bundled up Helga in her blanket, gave her a kiss on her rosy cheek, and handed her over to her mother.
"Thank you," she whispered, "for giving her a good start in life."
He couldn't speak. He felt like someone punched him in the gut. He placed his hands on the desk to balance himself. He was devastated, heart-broken.
"Do me a favor," he pleaded weakly, "the next time you decide to shoot up or leave her again, don't bring her here."
The words cut through her like a knife. She tried to hide the hurt look on her face, but she understood his feelings. She didn't expect him to forgive her, or even understand for that matter. She was her responsibility. She had to step up and be a mother to her child. Her father had already abandoned her and she didn't want to do the same. She needed to prove herself worthy. She felt all the glares burn through her as she passed by the desks. She opened the door and walked into the hall. The door clicked shut behind her and a piece of Mike's heart left with her.
He put his head in his hands. People stopped by his desk to offer sympathy pats on the shoulder. Everyone went back to work and let him be. Barek wiped the tears from her eyes and moved up behind Mike. She put her hand lightly on his arm. He didn't look up. He didn't want her to see the tears in his eyes.
"Hey, look at it this way," she said soothingly, "when the time comes, you know you will be a good father."
The comforting words brought a faint smile to his face. "If you say so, Carolyn."
"I know so," she stated firmly.
He looked over at the empty door, hoping for a change of heart, but Beckham never came back. Helga was gone from his life forever. He let out a sniff and wiped his nose. "What if that time never comes? What if Helga was my chance?" he panicked as he looked over at her.
"The time will come, Logan," Barek reassured him. "You'll just know and you will be fine."
Logan nodded and turned away. A wicked smile extended across his face. He swivelled around in his chair to face her. "Any suggestions on making it happen?"
Barek's face turned a bright shade of red. "Oh, you," she slapped him playfully on the arm, "you're terrible."
"C'mon, Carolyn. Give me my chance. Make it happen!" he tagged along after her as she ran for the door. "Please, Carolyn, please! The time is now!"
She stopped between a desk. "You stop that. I mean it!" she told him in a firm manner, but couldn't stop a few giggles from creeping out.
He chased her down the steps as Deakins and Carver looked on.
"Back to normal?" Carver questioned as he gathered up his briefcase.
"Back to normal." Deakins nodded, grinning as he poured himself his fourth cup of coffee.