A/N: Well, here we go with chapter 1. Please bear with me on this story. There is an immense amount of research I have to do for so many different factors and I want to be as accurate as possible. So, chapters may come a little slower than they usually do. Hopefully it will be worth that extra wait. And, even though I've already said it in my previous authors note, this story is VERY angsty, so be very warned. If you don't like heartache then this may not be for you.

Thank you for the reviews, I hope they continue to come. I love your thoughts. And, as always, thank you to calim for continuing to be my beta and encouraging me to plod on.

On with the show….

Chapter 1

2 hours later

Yet again the beeping was the first thing that registered in his brain and his eyes fluttered drowsily until he felt a pressure on his hand. Turning his head, he saw Catherine sitting by his side giving him a soft smile.

"Hi," she said quietly.

Grissom smacked his lips together feeling immensely thirsty. "Hi," he croaked back. "Water?"

She pointed over her shoulder. "I'll need to go ask the doctor because I don't know what you're allowed."

"Wait," he said, squeezing her hand as she started to stand.

Pausing, Catherine looked into his eyes and the sadness she saw made her gut clench.

"How's Sara?" he whispered.

Catherine hesitated with her answer. "Maybe you'd better talk to the doctor about that. He knows all the details." She knew enough but wasn't sure if she had the heart to tell him and she hated herself for that.

"Please," he begged. "Just tell me what you know."

Sighing, she dropped her other hand over his, encasing it. "She's in a bad way, Gil."

His eyes closed. "How bad?"

Opening her mouth, Catherine struggled to get any words out and was grateful when the door opened and Grissom's doctor stepped in along with a nurse.

"Ah, we're awake," Steven said as the nurse began to check Grissom's vitals.

"Yeah," Catherine replied. "And he's thirsty but I wasn't sure if he could have some water."

Steven nodded to the nurse. "Nurse Jones will bring some for you shortly," he said. "How are you feeling, Gil?"

"I'd like some answers about my wife," Grissom answered. "And I don't seem to be getting any."

Grabbing Grissom's charts, Steven nodded. "I understand that, really I do, so let me take a look at you first and then we can talk. Okay?"

Grissom wanted to argue but he knew it probably wouldn't get him anywhere so he just agreed. "Okay," he sighed.

"Good," Steven said moving in closer. "Do you think you can sit up? I need to get a look at that stomach of yours."

"I guess," Grissom mumbled. "Stomach hurts though."

"It will," Steven replied as he placed a hand behind his patient's shoulder.

Grissom winced as he began to sit up, his eyes clenching which kicked off the pain in his nose causing a tear to stream down his cheek. He needed to remember to stop doing that. Then again, he couldn't help that particular reflex.

"You have four broken ribs, Gil," Steven continued once they had him propped up against his pillows. "So it's going to be pretty sore for a while. Sitting up will make you more comfortable."

Catherine watched as they pulled the bedsheet back and began unfastening Grissom's gown. "Do you want me to step out?" she asked knowing her friend wasn't one to flash his bare body to everyone.

Grissom shook his head. "No, it's fine," he answered, jumping when Steven pressed on his stomach around the strapping.

"Tender?" Steven asked.

"Hmmm," Grissom muttered.

Grabbing his stethoscope, Steven popped the tips in his ears and placed the drum against Grissom's chest. "Take the deepest breath in that you can, Gil, and then breathe out."

Clenching his fingers, Grissom sucked in a breath, a huge burning passing through his chest before he exhaled.

"Well done," Steven praised. "Can you do it one more time?" After nodding Grissom breathed in and out again, groaning this time at the stinging. "How did that feel?" the doctor asked, pulling the tips from his ears.

"Sore," Grissom replied. "Burns."

"Let's keep him on the anti-inflammatories for at least the next 24 hours and then we'll reassess," Steven said to the nurse, refastening Grissom's gown.

"The bruising around the strapping seems to have stilled so that's a good thing," Steven said, placing the stethoscope back around his neck. "Any pain in your chest?"

Grissom shook his head. "No. Not unless I breathe too hard."

"And how's your head feeling?" Steven asked, reaching out to gently clasp each of Grissom's cheeks.

"Not as bad as it did."

"Move your eyes from side to side for me," Steven requested, watching intently as Grissom complied. "How does that feel?"

"Stings."

"Any problems seeing?"

"No," Grissom answered again.

"Good." Steven stepped back. "I think you'll have the bruising for a few days and then it should start to do down. We'll keep you on a medium painkiller until that pain goes away but if it gets any worse you need to let us know."

"I will," Grissom sighed. "Is that it? Can you tell me about Sara now?"

Smiling sympathetically, Steven nodded as the nurse pulled the covers back over Grissom before stepping away.

"Sara is back in surgery," Steven told him.

Grissom swallowed hard. "Why?" he asked quietly.

Before Steven answered, the nurse returned with a jug of water and a glass and Catherine took it from her.

"Here, let me do that," the CSI offered. Nodding, the nurse handed the items over before leaving again.

"Have a drink first," Catherine directed, pouring some water. "And then the doctor can tell you everything.

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Grissom sat in stunned silence, staring into nothing. He wanted to believe this was just a terrible nightmare, something he would soon wake from, because the alternative was so much harsher. Sara's injuries weren't just bad, they were life changing.

Her legs had severe tibia and fibula fractures. He nearly puked when the doctor said her left ankle had been forced out of the skin due to the impact and her left kneecap had been broken in two places. Surgery was essential, not only to realign her bones, but to discover the extent of any tissue or muscle damage. And it wasn't just her legs. Her right wrist, handcuffed to the car, had been broken and several discs in her back had also been injured. Risk of infection was high.

"Gil?" Catherine urged, rubbing his hand.

Slowly, his eyes drew to hers and what she saw within them sent a shiver down her spine. He looked angry, so very angry but beyond that anger was total, utter fear.

Taking a breath and trying to will away the floating feeling surrounding him, he looked at the doctor. "How long will she be in surgery?"

"4 to 6 hours is estimated," Steven said. "But that could change."

"I want to see her as soon as she's out," Grissom demanded.

Steven nodded. "I will let you know when surgery is over."

Rubbing a hand over his forehead, Grissom sighed. "What happens after that?"

"We won't know until we get the surgeon's report," the doctor said honestly. "What's been done, what will still need to be done. This may be a long process."

Moving his hand to his mouth, Grissom looked down and bit down on his finger until it hurt.

He was afraid to ask the next question but he just had to. "Is…she going to be able to walk?"

Clearing his throat, Steven waited until Grissom lifted his head and looked at him. "I know you want answers but, right now that's a question I simply can't answer with any certainty. Not until we have more details. But I promise you, when we do, I will go through everything."

Grissom just shrugged, he didn't know what else to do.

"Try and relax, Gil. You need rest."

Rolling his eyes then wishing he hadn't, Grissom shook his head. "Sure," he mumbled, looking away again. "Whatever."

Steven turned to Catherine. "I'll have some food sent in shortly."

"I'll make sure he eats something," she replied.

Looking at Catherine, Grissom narrowed his eyes but she gave back as good as she got.

"I'll be back in later," Steven continued. "Be sure to call if you need anything, Gil, but the nurses will be in and out."

"Got a time machine?" Grissom asked.

"Sadly not," Steven replied sympathetically. "But while I know we can't change what's happened, we can do our best to make things right."

Biting his lip, Grissom nodded and Steven offered him a smile before stepping towards the door.

"Wait!" Grissom called and then swallowed. The doctor stopped and turned around. "How…how are the babies?"

Steven smiled. "Not much change but they're doing okay."

A small sigh of relief passed through Grissom's lips. "What sex?" he asked, realizing he was yet to be told.

"A boy and a girl."

Grissom's mouth opened with surprise. He wasn't expecting that. "One of each," he mumbled quietly and then he had another thought. Should he ask to see them? Could he see them without Sara by his side? Was that his right? He didn't know.

"Get some rest," Steven repeated. "I should have more news later."

Catherine watched the doctor leave then turned back to Grissom, her heart breaking at the look on his face. She opened her mouth to say something when her cell rang. Pulling it out of her pocket, she glanced at the caller ID and answered

"Hey, Mom," she greeted. "He's…doing okay," she said as Grissom watched her. "She's in surgery," she continued. "I'll let you know when we have more news. Okay, I will. Call you later. Bye."

"You should go home," Grissom told her.

Snorting, she rose and sat on the edge of the bed. "Wouldn't make me a good friend if I did that now, would it?"

"Right now," Grissom sighed, "I'm not even sure if the best of friends can save me."

"Don't say that," she replied swiftly. "You…need to be strong. Sara needs you more now than ever before." He looked completely deflated and bowed his head. "Michael says he loves you."

A heavy breath fell from his lips, head rising and tears stinging his eyes. "Is he okay?"

She smiled, giving his shoulder a very gentle squeeze. "He's fine. Asking for you guys though."

Grissom smiled at the thought of his son. "Could use a cuddle right now," he whimpered and then his face crumbled. He just couldn't hold it in anymore.

"Oh, Gil," Catherine whispered, reaching out to her friend and doing her best to hold him as he cried. "It will be okay," she tried to reassure. "I promise it will be okay."

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Grissom was sleeping, had been for a while, pretty much blacking out not long after breaking down in Catherine's arms. Both physically and emotionally exhausted, Catherine wasn't surprised he'd gone back to sleep. As far as she was concerned, it was the best thing for him right now.

She sat with him for a while until a nurse came in with food, promptly walking back out when she saw the patient was asleep then returning to do her checks. Leaving her to it for a few minutes, Catherine stepped outside to stretch her legs, seeing Nick and Greg sitting in the corridor. They'd gone home earlier and she had no idea they'd returned so soon. Spotting her, they got up and approached.

"How's he doing?" Nick asked.

"Not great," Catherine replied, folding her arms. "He's in a lot of pain and pretty devastated."

"We talked to the doctor," Greg said sadly. "He told us about Sara. I…just…" His head shook, no more words seemed to want to come out.

"We all need to be strong," Catherine implored. "For ourselves and for Gil and Sara."

Nick swallowed, looking down the corridor as a doctor ran by. "Any more news on the twins?" he asked.

Catherine shook her head. "Not really. Doing okay but still the same." Yawning, she held her hand to her mouth.

"Why don't you go home and get some rest?" Nick suggested. "We can stay with Grissom for a while. Ecklie said we're all off duty for the next 24 hours."

"That's nice of him," she mumbled. "But I'm not going anywhere until after Sara's out of surgery," she replied. "I won't leave him until then."

Nick knew arguing with her would be a losing battle so he didn't. Slipping his hands into his pockets, he nodded. "Is there anything we can do?"

"Not right now," she replied. "Why don't you guys go back home…" She trailed off, spotting Brass coming down the corridor and the two men turned to see what she was looking at. "Jim," she greeted.

"Hey," he breathed, looking to all in turn. "Where are we?"

"Sara's in surgery," Catherine told him. "Gil's asleep."

Biting on his lip, Brass nodded. "How's he holding up?"

"Not much better. Once he stops blaming himself he might take a step forwards."

Sighing, Brass rubbed his chin. "Well, I don't think I helped in that department at one point."

Catherine frowned. "What do you mean?"

Brass puffed out a breath. "At the store I…I told him it was his fault Sara was in the mess. He got shitty with the way I was handling things and it just came out. I didn't mean it but…"

"I don't think he even remembers that, Jim," Catherine assured him.

"I wouldn't be surprised," Brass argued.

"So much has happened," she continued. "It's not your words making him blame himself."

"How can he blame himself?" Nick asked. "He didn't ask Sara to go into that store."

Brass looked at him. "No. But he ditched their day together to go to work. If he hadn't then…"

"Okay stop," Catherine said, holding up a hand. "We can say 'what if' until the cows come home but what's done is done. We have to help them both get through this. Nothing less. And Gil blaming himself isn't going to help anything."

"Yeah," Brass agreed, pulling out his cell when it vibrated in his pocket. He read a text message and sighed.

"What's that?" Catherine asked.

"McKeen," he said irritated. "He wants me to talk to Gil about what happened at the store."

The CSI crew frowned in unison.

"Are you serious?" Nick snapped.

The captain nodded, putting his phone away. "He's not happy Gil helped the fugitives escape."

"Tell him to go fuck himself," Catherine griped and Brass' eyebrows soared. "How dare he?" she growled. "Asshole."

"I'll second that," Greg added.

"Me, too," Nick agreed.

Brass smirked. "Well, he's going to have to wait. That's the last thing on my mind right now and Gil has more important things to think about."

"Good," Catherine agreed. "Any news on the fugitive?"

"No," Brass replied. "Not a sniff yet. Still checking around the hospitals but no reports matching our guy's ID."

The nurse came out of Grissom's room and Catherine pointed to the door. "I'm going back in. Would one of you lovely gentlemen like to grab me a coffee? Strong and black."

"Yeah, we can do that," Nick said, slapping Greg arm. "Caffeine sounds good."

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It was almost 7pm when Grissom's eyes opened. He'd been asleep all afternoon. Catherine still sat by his side and smiled when he glanced at her.

"Hey, you," she whispered.

"Hey," he whispered back. "How are you still awake?"

She shrugged. "I have my extra strong batteries in."

He managed a smirk. "What time is it?"

"Just past 7."

Blinking, he looked around. "Sara?"

"She's out of surgery," Catherine told him.

A deep frowned pierced his forehead. "Why the hell didn't…" He paused as Catherine shot out of her chair and sat on the edge of the bed.

"You were asleep and she's only been out a short while. Right now, she's in recovery so you can't see her anyway."

Feeling a shudder roll through his body, he sighed. "Did the doctor tell you anything?"

She shook her head. "No. But he said he'd be back in…" Stopping when she heard the door open, Catherine looked over her shoulder to see the subject of their conversation enter the room. "About now then," she finished.

Grissom felt his gut turn as the doctor approached.

"Just woke up?" Steven asked.

"Yeah," Grissom answered. "How's my wife?" he asked desperately.

"She's stable," Steven replied. "Just been taken to the ICU."

All color drained from Grissom's face. "ICU? I…what…," he stuttered. "Why? You just said she was stable."

Steven held up a hand. "Please don't panic," he implored. "Sara has been placed into a post-anaesthesia recovery unit because she needs extra care and because it's taking her a little longer to come out of the aesthetic. Considering her condition, this will provide her with immediate and constant post-op observation. She will only be there for a limited amount of time until we're satisfied she has met a set physiological criteria before we transfer her. This is the best thing for her, I promise. She will get all the care she needs by the best staff we have."

"I want to see her," Grissom demanded. "Now."

Grissom's voice held steel and Steven didn't argue. Instead he pointed to the IV. "A quick assessment first to see if we can take the IV out, okay? It will make getting you there a lot easier and more comfortable."

"Fine," Grissom sighed. "But can we hurry up?"

"Sure," Steven agreed, hitting the call button. "We'll do it as quickly as we can."

A/N: Got the tissues out yet? *Sniff*