Just Can't Get Enough
Summary: 5 times story- 5 potential times Sebastian and Kurt could have been a thing (and were).
–
AN: A different 5x series loosely inspired by Mariposa. These are just random thoughts I had while writing Mariposa and actually have nothing to do with that story. Other than the random thoughts that popped into my head while writing it. Some 'times' are more closely related characterization-wise to Mariposa and some are completely different but with the same goal in mind. They're not off-branches to the main story and what-ifs or different timelines. I say this here just so you don't think Time 2 is their future, because it's not. It's just one possibility of life in a gazillion possibilities. They're really just random thoughts that I decided to put together and they're at different points in time in the 'show canon' (except for Izzy, she's fancanon, nearly always).
–
Time 1
Post Slushy
–
(There was definitely a moment or 2 – between apologies, etc)
–
"Where's Cyclops?" Sebastian asked, coming to a stop in front of Kurt's table. Kurt was sitting there ahead of anyone else joining him. Mercedes was getting coffee for both of them and he loomed over Kurt with his arms crossed over his chest and smirking down at him.
"He's still in the hospital. Now go, you're blocking all the good light."
"That's too bad, he was cute." Sebastian laughed lightly, ignoring the rest of what Kurt said. "So he's been sending you gifts from the hospital?" He glanced at the candy bar that was untouched next to Kurt. He knew Kurt well enough to know that Kurt would never open it.
It would definitely be ate, but not by him. His family or friends would get to it before it could go bad.
Kurt sighed and leaned back in his seat. "You know, you keep saying to Blaine 'once a Warbler, always a Warbler', but you seem to forget that I was also a Warbler."
"For like 6 months." Sebastian shook his head.
"Longer than you've been a Warbler." Kurt pointed out. "It's only 5 months into the school year and I only left because my parents couldn't keep spending that kind of money on me." It sank in for Kurt that he needed to start looking at alternatives, private schools like NYADA were even more expensive and unless he could swing a scholarship of some sort, his parents wouldn't be able to afford to help him out there either. He didn't want to put them into severe debt by having them all open up a loan. The tuition of Dalton was whatever they had left of their salaries after they paid off the house loan each month.
"That's just depressing. You're going to end up a barista at this coffee shop and that's all you're ever going to amount to. Might as well just stuff your dreams aside in a bag labeled 'loser aspirations'." His tone was so mocking and Kurt looked at him, trying to read that sarcasm. Was he just being rude? Typically mean Sebastian who was chasing after Blaine?
Kurt pushed it. "So you don't think that I should become a doctor, lawyer or tax accountant or something?"
Sebastian laughed hard. "Nobody would accept you in those fields."
"Because I'm gay?" Kurt checked, Sebastian was too and he knew that Sebastian's family was probably pushing him toward one of those careers, everyone at Dalton was pushed toward one of those money making and powerful fields. Maybe not tax accountant necessarily, but Hedge Fund Manager.
"Because you don't have the disposition for it."
"That's enough, Sebastian, we don't accept bullies around here and I'm surprised you haven't been kicked out of Dalton since you're the biggest and worst of them all." Mercedes interjected and Sebastian would have said more but saw the hot coffee without a lid that she was ready to throw at him.
He held up his hands and glanced once more at Kurt. "See you around, side-kick."
Kurt glowered at him but didn't say anything in reponse, doing so would just keep Sebastian around for longer, which was not what he wanted.
Mercedes sat down and handed Kurt his drink while Sebastain left, they instantly forgot about him and transitioned into whatever it was they were intending to talk about. Or it appeared that way to Sebastian as he heard them start talking about something else, not even mentioning him or complaining about his presence there today. He sighed. He hadn't meant to say all that, something about Kurt just made him run his mouth. He'd been intending to ask about Blaine and see how he was doing, not insult both of them. Blaine's texts said he was fine and knew Sebastian had no ill will toward him. Totally neglecting the fact that he had intented to maim his boyfriend. Sebastian wanted to hear it from Kurt too who had seen him in person recently.
He had put the rock salt in the drink to... well no, that was a stupid idea to begin with, he wasn't sure what he was intending to accomplish with that other than ruin Kurt's day. He hadn't thought of the possibility that it could blind Kurt. Blaine stepping in was actually a blessing for all of them. He'd only gotten it in one eye rather than both like Kurt would have with his wide open eyes and facing Sebastian on directly whereas Blaine was turned sideways and it covered most of his face but he was pushing Kurt out of the way and didn't have his eyes open all the way to start with.
The guilt gnawing it's way through Sebastian would have been tenfold if he'd actually hurt Kurt. Cold reality of day made him realize just how far he'd gone. His actions with Santana afterward wasn't any better but it didn't have anything harmful in it. That had been done in anger directed more at himself and it just made him feel worse by repeating such a terrible act. Something was very wrong with him. He started going to counseling that very day, but it was a slow process and he was working through his motivations and intentions.
His crack about giving up on his dreams had been meant to motivate through sarcasm but it hadn't landed that way. Sebastian sighed and turned his head to look through the window as Mercedes tore open the package of chocolate on the table with them as Kurt pressed it her way.
What was Blaine thinking? Candybars were not Kurt's style. Those two did not belong together at all.
After he'd nearly blinded Kurt, Sebastian had come to a sudden and terrible realization. It wasn't Blaine he was after. Sure he thought he was but that was just a dislusion. He hung out with Blaine on their own but Blaine ended up talking about Kurt all the time and Sebastian thought that annoyed him. Except he kept coming back to talk to Blaine and hear more about Kurt, never told him to stop. They texted all the time but it wasn't filled with the flirting that he usually would have and they just talked about nothing, he let Blaine lead the conversation which was just a lot of babbling and random words. Then when Kurt was around he spent all his time with the two of them throwing barbs at Kurt and bantering with him.
Sebastian groaned at he walked away. He was such an idiot and a terrible, terrible person.
He went to the club that night and because he was in such a terrible mood and because he was still a terrible person who only wanted one person now that he could never have, he crushed another person asking him for genuine advice. He hadn't thought anything of smacking him down verbally and emotionally. He wasn't anyone important to him and he'd likely never see him around again.
Then... that boy tried to kill himself.
He didn't know about the Kurt of it all and who he was to Kurt and vice versa. Nor how both of these bullies had used bullying as a way to get closer to him. Like the perverbial boy pulling pigtails on the playground. He just knew he hurt someone else, badly, and ended up hospitalizing them as well.
Sebastian was dosed with a figerative slushy shower. His slow progress with the therapist wasn't enough, he had to change now.
He apologized to those he hurt physically and verbally, those he hospitalized – in person, with charity and with song. His mouth opened to say an even more heartfelt apology to Kurt and he even looked at him but then his lips twisted and couldn't get the words out. He'd even apologized to Santana but couldn't find the words or ability to speak to Kurt and say the things he really needed to say. He'd hurt him the most in so many ways even if he didn't put Kurt in the hospital like he had with the other two boys.
He was the most important one to apologize to and the only one he couldn't.
He apologized to Finn for the photoshopping, to Rachel for all he'd done to her. To the rest of New Directions for stealing their setlist and for all the stuff he said and did and whatever else he could apologize for.
Still not one word of sorry was said to Kurt. In fact, while the barbs were lighter, he was still insulting the boy or pretending to ignore and ice him out while he talked with the others. Except all of his thoughts and attention were on every movement the boy made. He didn't know why he couldn't leap over that hurdle. He was good at getting around obstacles. Kurt though was an insurmountable wall for him. He swallowed hard whenever he was alone and feared that his actions, though less harsh than before, would just continue a pattern, and maybe it would go too far this time, unable to walk back from it.
He thought Kurt was tougher than that, had certainly appeared that way at least. Kurt had gotten over his side of things and talked to Sebastian decently even though he still didn't like Sebastian nor actively sought him out. He just tolerated him more and accepted the apology. Though he hadn't forgotten or forgiven. Nor should he.
The other Dalton boys apologized to Kurt, some sobbing and begging for forgiveness. Kurt said he forgave them and they all hugged it out. Sebastian knew though while he said it and would treat them all decently, he would always be on the look out for the next stab in the back. He chose not to make it a big deal but he was weary of all his so-called friends and put up with them, giving them chance after chance though he knew who they were and how they would inevitably hurt him again.
Sebastian had watched Kurt and Blaine go through several rough patches that year. There were so many moments when Blaine made Kurt felt badly about himself that Sebastian could have swooped in and turned his head, offered kind words. Instead he still insulted him.
Then, when Klaine patched everything up after winning nationals and were stronger than ever, Sebastian resigned himself to the fact that he'd missed out on the one person who had actually made him feel something other than lust or disdain.
Then the biggest upset ever happened, Rachel Berry got into NYADA and Kurt didn't. Blaine had told him all of the gossip and every single step that led them to this situation. Sebastian had stared at his phone unsure how that could be. Rachel had hurt Kurt once again.
The school year ended and Blaine went to go work at the amusement park in Chicago and Kurt resigned himself to a life in Lima.
Sebastian waited for his moment and once knew Blaine was safely out of sight and state, Sebastian rolled up to the Lima Bean and ordered a coffee during the busiest time of the day from an extremely busy Kurt Hummel. He leaned on the counter and drawled out his words so incredibly slowly with long pauses. Kurt was handling the stress of the busy cafe well but he was starting to get agitated by Sebastian's presence just causing a jam.
"Will you order already?" Kurt snapped, knowing Sebastian was only doing it to annoy him. "You get the same thing every time. I don't even know why you come in, it's just a black coffee. You could make the same thing for so much cheaper and faster at home. It'd probably be better too with your fancy machine and hasn't been sitting for a couple of hours by the time you get at it."
"Really?" Sebastian tipped his head. "Would you say that again? I didn't get a chance to record it."
"The only reason to come here is for a fancy coffee but you never order them." Kurt growled. "Can I just get you your drink already? Medium, right?"
Sebastian leaned back and chuckled. "I think I'll just have a water today." Kurt stared at him in disbelief. "The free one, not the bottled."
Kurt spun and grumbled as he slammed a plastic cup into a dispenser and put ice and water into a cup and came back to Sebastian. He could have done it himself, they were sitting out for people to drink while waiting in line. He shoved it toward Sebastian who held up his hands and shook his head. "I didn't want ice."
Kurt spun and dumped it out and put the water in the cup this time. "Here." He growled.
Sebastian shook his head, the people behind him were increasingly growing in anxiety and annoyance at the hold-up. "That cup has already been used."
"Sebastian, I swear if you don't take this cup and go away I won't be responsible for my actions." Kurt said with far more violence in his voice than Sebastian had ever heard from him.
Just because he could, and because it amused him to no end, he leaned forward and put his face nearly in Kurt's. "A new cup, princess."
"You're the princess." Kurt grumbled and backed away to do just that. "You're so finicy and particular. Only a princess would be so demanding."
"Then you're the one not living up to your name." Sebastian said as he took the cup from Kurt's hand, making sure his fingers touched Kurt's as he did so. He winked. "See you around." Then he headed to the window to sit and watch Kurt struggle to catch up after that blip.
Kurt lost track of the bully near the end of the rush and once it cleared up, he looked around for him, wondering why he'd leave after sitting there watching him for hours. He wondered why Sebastian would watch him for hours. Granted it was only 2 to 3 hours, but still.
Then his boss came over and cleared his throat when the building practically cleared out as quickly as it filled up, instantly. Kurt was exhausted, they all were and he looked at his boss who hadn't lifted a finger to help out at all.
"Yes?" Kurt had never exactly been buddy buddy with the manager. He'd gotten the job over his head.
"I've had a few complaints about you today, the most important one was about how you were incredibly rude and told them to go home and make coffee rather than support us."
"He didn't buy anything! He was just here to annoy me." Kurt protested, knowing he'd only said that to one person.
"Regardless, you need to be better with the customers. I'd give you a chance to prove yourself and show me you can but this complaint came from a VIP and I can't ignore him. You're fired."
"You waited until after the rush to do this." Kurt shook his head and tore his apron off and threw it at him. "Whatever, I make more money at my dad's shop." He reached into the tip jar and pulled out a handful of bills. "These are my tips." Then he spun on his heel, stuffing the bills into his pocket and headed toward the door.
"We're just going to take it from your paycheck." His manager commented and Kurt came back over and glared at him.
"You can't do that. I legally earned that money."
"We're just in our legal rights to assage our losses from your actions." Kurt pushed the bills back into the jar.
"Then I'm taking the whole thing." He picked up the jar and turned back around and left without a look back. He did pause in the door. "You know I single handedly supported this establishment with my friends and boyfriend over the last two years, right? You've just lost all of our business and I'm going to tell everyone about the rats." He continued on his way out and ignored the manager's shouts. He didn't care what the man had to say, even if it was to offer him his job back.
Sebastian was leaning against his car when he walked out. Kurt scowled. "What do you want now? Wasn't it enough to get me fired?"
"Good, you didn't belong there."
"You told me that's all I would ever amount to, only thing that I could do. Now you've taken that away."
"You were supposed to give me the finger and prove otherwise." Sebastian told him honestly and took the jar of money from him a bit forcefully and put it onto the hood. There was a cap on it so it couldn't all fly away. He turned back to Kurt and wrapped his hands around Kurt's arms, holding him in place. "You don't belong in Lima, you don't belong in Ohio. You belong up on the stage, proving to everyone how wrong they were."
"I didn't get in."
"Then go somewhere else, get on the stage a different way."
"I won't be able to afford it." Kurt didn't fight to be released or to move away from the suddenly close position they were now in. "You just assured that I'll never be able to afford it."
"Your dad's a senator now. He's got more money coming in that you've ever seen in your life. More than he's ever made in his entire life, even with being an owner of a mechanic shop. I voted for him, by the way."
"You're 18?" Kurt thought he was only a junior.
"Early birthday, something you know all too well." It was true, Kurt was now 19, well on his way to being 20. Ironically he was the oldest in his class. It was a special election too, so it didn't happen in November, it had happened in April.
"You can't apologize by claiming that. It's one vote and maybe it helped tip the balance but that was to get my father elected, not making it up to me. You were just furthering the gay agenda, not supporting me or my dad, just supporting him because he supports all of us."
"I am not trying to do that, I just wanted to tell you I supported your father, my family does too. They donated to the cause and raised awareness in Westerville." Sebastian's hands slid to Kurt's elbows. "I support you. I want to get you to your dreams in anyway I can and if that means making sure you don't settle and get stuck here in Lima, then I'll do that even underhandedly but you did say everything you did, so I didn't have to lie to get you out of there. You would slowly die in there until there was nothing left of you."
"What does it matter to you? You hate me."
"You matter to me and I don't hate you. It's quite the opposite actually. I care about you too much and too much to let you end up here."
"There's nothing wrong with living your life in Lima."
"For people like your dad and Finn, maybe not. But even your dad's going to be living in D.C. On occasion from now on. Even he's leaving."
"I could have always gone with him then."
"Maybe, but you belong in New York, no matter what you're doing there or how you get there, that's where you belong."
"How am I going to manage that?" Kurt asked, feeling defeated and leaned against his car this time and looked at Sebastian as if he would have all the answers. Sebastian liked to think he did.
"You're Kurt Hummel. What can't you do?"
Kurt scoffed. "Apparently everything, nothing has worked out for me this year."
"Like I said, you're just in the wrong state. Get to New York any way you can and you'll see that. Change state residencies, get a job and work there for a year and reapply next year or at NYU, they'd be lucky to have you. Get on Broadway without having to go to school, prove to the world that the talent you have doesn't need to be taught, just natural. Be better than even Rachel Berry and give the middle finger to those who had toyed with you."
"Including you?" Kurt looked at Sebastian wearily.
"Even me." Sebastian agreed, closing in on his space. "I'm going to prove to you that a change is necessary in not just location but a complete overhaul of your life is needed."
"You won't be able to prove that to me." Kurt shook his head. "I'm happy."
"You just think you are, it's your first relationship."
"You're not a safer bet." Kurt argued. "You've been chasing after my boyfriend for a year. Now that he's out of town you've turned your attentions to me. If anything, you'd be even more of a risk."
He was glad Kurt picked that up without him having to spell it out himself. Sebastian let go of one of Kurt's arms and slid a knuckle under Kurt's chin. "Maybe that will just make it more exciting."
Kurt looked tempted, so incredibly tempted to see what the fuss was all about, to get the second self declared too good for you boy to fall in line just like the first but Kurt pushed him back. "I'm not a cheater. Nor will I take anyone's leftovers or 2nd choices anymore. The next boy I fall for will have chosen me first and foremost and never even flirted with another boy in my presence and will continue to choose me over all other temptations and not even let me think for one second there's another person they'd rather be with or ignore me for."
Sebastian shook his head. "Maybe the next boy will be that for you. But you and I? We'll end up together in the end. What we have can't be ignored or pushed aside forever."
"Insults and violence? Unease and distrust?" Kurt questioned somewhat seriously.
"A fire that burns hot between us."
"That is not what a relationship can be built upon. It will just destroy everything it touches."
"And without fire, the occupants of the relationship freeze to death. It draws you in and keeps you warm and safe from outside dangers."
Inexplicitly Sebastian's prediction did come true. It took a betrayal, hurting a really good guy, a stupid breakup that would have been the best choice in the end to stay that way, each time. Another betrayal and hurting yet another nice guy before a divorce and two more relationships that just sucked before Sebastian and Kurt found their way into each other's lives again.
It was a relationship that actually worked, even if it to the outside world there seemed to be a lot of flaws.
And another prediction of Sebastian's had also come true. Kurt got his residency and worked in New York for a year under a fashion icon before he was eligible for instate tuition and managed to continue working for her while getting a degree in business and finance, something Sebastian thought Kurt would never do. It was actually in their Masters in Business program at NYU that Sebastian and Kurt met again. Kurt used it to open his own theater years later and was able to put together all of his passions, skills and loves in one place. He may never have stared in a legit Broadway play, but he did what he adored and was able to share it with those he loved.
He also taught their kids to adore the stage too and his son went on to become one of the most famous Broadway stars, directors and cross over to Hollywood actors and directors in generations. His daughter also became a famous Broadway and Hollywood actress but she gave it all up to spearhead an NGO with her other father.
Both Kurt and Sebastian supported each other in their endevours and in life. The fact that they still threw barbs at each other only added to the fire rather than detracted from it.