Beloved Misery
I am very proud of the last chapter. I know many of you have questions, but honestly you will have to be patient and just read on to see how all of this is going to go. I'm also so glad that so many of you are enjoying this fan fiction!
Warnings: Sexual Content; Extreme Violence; Offensive Language
Rating: M for Mature
Good to know: LEMON means sex.
LIME means just the basic kissing and hugging
Disclaimer: I DON'T own Inuyasha or any of the characters associated with the series. I do own this storyline.
RECAP: "How could you..?" She mumbled. Kagome was a very understanding person and though her body was no longer pure, her heart still was and she could find it in herself to forgive Inuyasha, but not his demon. She understood that Inuyasha had no control over what was doing. He told her to get away. If she had not been so weak maybe she could have, but she didn't. Inuyasha's hanyou did not disserve to suffer for it. Not at all. That would not be fair. She could only blame this on his demon blood. END RECAP
Chapter 2: Forgiven, Not Forgotten
Kagome cried some more. She was lying down and turned towards the wall of the cavern. It had been a few days now and she had eaten little and slept as much as she could, trying to release all the horrors of that night from her and be placed into peace-filled dreams.
Inuyasha's demon just sat there. He was not ashamed of what he had done. He knew the hanyou was. He knew his hanyou and human would never forget and never be able to deal with this regret. He did not care what either of them thought. He only cared that he had a mate now. Him and his other parts... this was his mate to protect. Her crying was quite irritating, but the voices in his head had been none stop for the past few days. They yelled and screamed at him for what he had done. 'How dare you touch her! I can't believe... you stole her purity.. you took her most precious possession from her in a selfish desire! She'll never look at us the same way. You ruined EVERYTHING!' Inuyasha's hanyou screamed in his mind. His human could not speak up at all.
"You stupid hanyou." The demon muttered. Kagome turned her head slightly, knowing he was talking about the Inuyasha she knew and loved. "Why aren't you happy? I did you a favor.."
"No, you destroyed her life!" Inuyasha's hanyou yelled from the body.
"His hanyou..." Kagome mumbled. 'Inuyasha would have never done this to me. It's not him. I need the real him... I want him here with me. Please make this side of him tuck back in!' Kagome realized she had some leverage here. If the hanyou was fighting she could aid him and help the real Inuyasha to come out. "Inuyasha!" Kagome yelled. She sat up weakly. The demon looked over at her with blood-thirsty eyes.
"What do you want?"
"Not you! I want the hanyou. Let me see Inuyasha!"
"I am Inuyasha."
"The hanyou. Inuyasha you can do this. You have to fight!" Inuyasha felt a weird feeling in his gut. Kagome was still sticking up for him, even after his demon had done such a ruthless thing to her. She truly was one in a zillion. "Please come back to me. I miss you so much!" She cried out and crawled over to the growling demon. Inuyasha's demon held his head trying to hold in the now stronger thoughts. Kagome could see it was working. She just had to work a little harder. "Inuyasha! Come out! For me..."
"Ahh! You bitch!" Inuyasha's demon dug his nails into the floor. He was overwhelmed. His blood burned and his insides felt like they were being torn apart peace by peace.
"I NEED YOU HERE!" Kagome jumped up and into the demon's arms. She did not know what she was doing, but her instincts told her this was what she needed to do. Her miko could purify Inuyasha to an extent.
There was a glow coming from Kagome's hands and Inuyasha howled out in pain and threw her off of him. She flung into the wall and fell with a thud. She was not giving up so easily. Kagome looked up at Inuyasha's demon and watched the demon groaning and it's eyes slowly became more of a honey color. Tears welled in her eyes. Her Inuyasha was coming back.
"K... Kagome..." Inuyasha kneeled over. He felt so disgusting and dishonorable. He now controlled the body that had sullied Kagome's. "I..." He looked over at the trembling girl. He saw some excitement in her eyes, but they also seemed so hurt and helpless. Confused, pained. "I'm so sorry!" He yelled out. Kagome took in a ragged breath. She had thought this would be a little easier, but he was still in the form of the one who had raped her.
"I know." Kagome looked straight towards him, determined not to turn away. She had to face this now. 'Must be strong. Must not let go of him. I can't just waltz away from all of our memories. It's not his fault. He should not have to pay for it.' Kagome crawled forward. She smiled. She actually smiled.
Inuyasha gulped. He wanted to grab her and hold her for hours and hours - apologizing over and over and over again, but he still could not expect her forgiveness and he did not understand why she would smile at a time like this.
"Inuyasha.. you're back. I'm so glad." Kagome's smile was weak. She came as close to him as she could and wrapped her arms around him, leaning against him. "Inuyasha... it's not your fault. Don't apologize anymore."
"But Kagome..." Inuyasha could feel himself ready to cry. He had hurt her so much and no matter how much she denied it, it echoed in her voice. "I could not control myself." He returned in wrapping his arms around her. "I'll do anything I can to make up for what has happened. You don't have to stay here if you don't want to. You don't have to be hurt anymore. I'll give you anything you want. Just don't hurt anymore. I'm so stupid. I can't even control my demon. What kind of 'thing' am I?"
"I want to stay with you." Kagome closed her eyes and snuggled close to him. No more words were necessary for him to understand. "All I ask... is that you protect me and stay with me."
"Of course I will." Inuyasha put his chin on her hair. Her breathing was becoming less tense and more even. She was falling asleep. Her heart was so big. Inuyasha did not know how she could even bare to be near him after all that had happened, but she was - after all - Kagome. Instead of asking him to leave her alone and never see her again she came to him, asking for him and his protection and that was all she had asked for. He would truly do anything to make up for what he has done. If she had asked him to kill himself he would have. That's how far he would go for her.
Inuyasha felt he did not deserve Kagome. She was to wonderful and full-hearted. She disserved the world, not him. She excepted him as a hanyou. She had forgiven him when his demon had destroyed her sacred barricade. What had he done to be worthy of this beautiful and quite amazing miko, woman?
Inuyasha thought farther into the situation and recognized the fact that the others were probably searching for them. They were probably worried about Kagome. After all Inuyasha had taken her when he was in demon form. For all they knew Kagome could be dead and gone by now. Inuyasha realized he would have to bring Kagome back there soon and he would have to be sneaky about it too, since Kagome was not wearing any clothing other than his haori. They would become suspicious.
Inuyasha hugged Kagome a little closer and she moaned painfully. Inuyasha released her and looked at her.
"My back... hurts.." She mumbled into his haori. Inuyasha blinked in question and turned her to face away from him. She was still sleeping. He pulled down the haori from her back and his eyes widened in rage. She was slashed and bruised all over her back. It had plenty of dried blood and there were holes in her shoulders. He growled deeply. His demon had dug his nails into Kagome when taking on to much pleasure from her core. 'How dare he?' Inuyasha would kill his demon if it were not a part of him. His evil side.
"Kagome.." Inuyasha pulled the haori over her shoulders and pulled her back against him gently. Her wrapped his arms around her shoulders from behind and she leaned her head against his shoulder.
After taking a few more moments to nuzzle, Inuyasha pulled away. He slowly and carefully placed Kagome down on the ground. He needed to retrieve some water in a pale. He had to clean Kagome's wounds before they could become infected.
Later
Kagome opened her eyes slowly. She could feel a gentle feeling on her back. So tender... She moaned in contentment. It was so soothing. The water was warm on the cloth rubbing across her back.
"Inuyasha..."
"Hmm?"
"I understand that you're sorry..."
"Ka..."
"I do. Honestly. I don't want you to feel bad. It's not your fault and thinking it is won't change a thing."
"Kagome..." Inuyasha frowned. "How can you be so forgiving?"
"It won't be forgotten Inuyasha. No. Never, but it's not because of you. It was your demon. That is where my anger is directed at. Not you." After Kagome finished she noticed how bare she really was around the hanyou. The haori covered her bottom - leaving all the rest exposed, but since she was facing the ground her breast where hidden beneath her. "How does my back look?"
"A..." Inuyasha bit his lip and that sad, regretful look appeared on his face. How was he to explain to her that her back looked horrible. Inuyasha leaned down and traced a clawed finger around one of the wounds. "It's not looking good..."
"Ha... I see." Kagome said. She too frowned. This would be unexplainable to her family and the others. She then felt a cold tingle on her back. She turned her head in surprise. Inuyasha was licking her back. Her face contorted in confusion. "What are you doing?" She asked. Inuyasha spared her a look.
"My saliva will help heal the wounds with out scars." He answered as simply as he could and continued licking her wounds. She felt a little uncomfortable, but only nodded and turned back in a more comfortable direction. "They'll be healed soon."
"That's good to know." Kagome closed her eyes. "We need to get Tetsusaiga."
"Yeah."
"Miroku has it.. I think."
"When do you want to go back?"
"As soon as you finish what you're doing."
"K." Inuyasha wiped his finger over a small hole in her shoulder. He watched as Kagome flinch. "Sorry."
"It's fine."
"We're done." Inuyasha pulled the haori up on her.
"Thanks."
"No problem." Inuyasha placed the cloth in the pale. "You ready to go now?"
"Yeah." Kagome reluctantly sat up and pulled the haori fully around her.
The question here is 'What will the others think when they see Kagome's bruises?' and 'Will they see her before she can get fully dressed?'
See I told you things would get better. Trust me. It will only continue getting better and better.