Beloved Misery

To the person who commented on how I made likeInuyasha's demon was someone else: Ok lets get this straight. Inuyasha's demon IS NOT Inuyasha and that is something any Inuyasha fan would know. It's true it's a part of him, but he is also half human. When his demon takes control he has no idea what he is doing and he does things he would never normally do and for those of you who have seen the episodes he becomes a demon you should know that. So by making Inuyasha's demon sound like another person I am not doing anything wrong. I still mention it's a part of Inuyasha and all...

As I said last chapter I can understand that it was a bit annoying that Inuyasha seemed so much off character. Trust me, I understand. One of my talents it reading people and learning their personalities from movements, which is why I tend to portray a characters personality nicely most of the time. Sometime it can be not right, but that's mainly because I listen to music while I write... actually I have to. It's a serious habit, but anyway the music I listen to tends to either lower or upper my mood and effect my writing abilities sometimes.

Warnings: Sexual Content; Extreme Violence; Offensive Language

Rating: M for Mature

Good to know: LEMON means sex.

LIME means just the basic kissing and hugging

Disclaimer: I DON'T own Inuyasha or any of the characters associated with the series. I do own this storyline.

RECAP: He felt like a lost and lonely child that could never be at peace with themselves for the manslaughter they committed.

"Please stop hurting." Inuyasha wrapped his arms around Kagome and held her close to him. The thing Inuyasha didn't seem to understand was that what he was doing now was actually making the hurt all seem to disappear. In his arms she felt such calmness that nothing compared, not even the mass sorrow in her soul... END RECAP

Chapter 5: Beloved Save Me From My Misery

Running, the girl found she no longer had this energy or this strength. Her world was spinning and everything seemed to be going wrong. Nothing right had happened to her lately. Everyone mocked her, hated her. She didn't understand...

At first things had been going well and she thought she could deal with her life and live on forgetting what she had not wanted to remember, but fate seemed to be against her once more and she could no longer take this pressure.

She grasped her plump belly in pain and slid down the tree. The rain was pouring down and crying out the tears she could no longer hold in. Was she truly this much of a coward? To run away from the only hope she had? 'Why!' Her mind screamed, her heart, her body, her soul. She was in a sea of perpetual confusion.

She didn't understand why they had to hate her for this. Why did the people on the streets make fun of her? She had thought she had done nothing wrong, but apparently no one had the same thoughts on the matter.

Kagome leaned her head down and stared at the muddy ground, reminiscing about what had happened since that night. After Inuyasha had told her his feelings and apologized over again she had thought things would be fine. She had desired that they could both just forget about it and move on with their lives, but no... the gods had to make things difficult for her. They had to permanently ruin things... with proof, with a baby...

She had been raped three months earlier and only two months earlier had found out she was pregnant. As soon as she found out she had immediately shut herself away from everyone and in worry of the risk of Inuyasha smelling the truth she had given him a false peace of attitude and come back to her time, telling him to stay away from her.

She realized that it was probably something he would never forget and always ache for, but what else could she do? What would he had done if he knew the truth of the matter? She knew that he would no ridicule her. She knew he would understand, but he would be ten times as guilty and probably not be able to bear being around her anyway.

She was disgusting to the people around her. People knew she was young and her belly - although still pretty small - did prove she was with child and in the modern times that was not right. Her family didn't know what to do. She had refused to tell them the truth. She refused to explain that she was raped, so she had told them a lie and said that her and Inuyasha had gotten drunk. Her mother seemed to understand, but at the same time was still a bit more distant than before all of this. She figured it was probably because she had disgraced her and tainted herself. She was no longer pure enough to be near them.

Kagome dearly wanted to return back to the feudal ages. She missed her friends and everyday she missed Inuyasha. She could not stand being away from him for so long, but at this rate she didn't know if she would ever see him again. That thought made her shake with fear. She wanted to hold him again, she wanted him to comfort her like he had and she wanted to opportunity to make him smile again and make him feel happy... that would make her feel happy as well.

"Owah!" Kagome moaned in pain and wrapped her arms tighter around her gut. This baby was hurting her. She knew why. It was hurting her because it was a half demon and she was only a human... a weak and fragile girl. The child was cutting her up with its grown fangs and claws.

She would not know how to deal with a half demon child. She could never harbor one in the modern ages and she didn't know how to take care of them either way. What would people think when they would see a baby with claws and fangs and amber eyes?

"Kagome!" Kagome looked up at the sound of her mothers concerned voice. "Kagome!" Her mother called again. Kagome saw the woman walking around with in umbrella looking from left to right.

"Mom, I'm here!" Kagome got up waited for her mother to notice her and as soon as she was noticed the woman came over quickly.

"Oh, dear. I was so worried. I've been looking everywhere for you. She left without saying a word. Your dinner is ready."

"Thanks, but I'm not really hungry."

"I understand your going through a tough time, but you do need to eat. For your baby and for yourself." Her motherly tone didn't really seem like one you would want to argue with so Kagome slowly nodded her head. "Alright, lets go back and get you some dry clothes before you catch hypothermia." Mrs. Higurashi let Kagome share the umbrella with her.

Looking at her mother from the side of her gaze Kagome knew that she was only a foot away in reality, but in a mental state she seemed so far away from her. Kagome couldn't remember the last time she gave this woman a hug. Months ago!

Later

After a nice warm bath Kagome lied her head down on the pillow and covered up her form with the blanket. It was pretty cold. It was almost half way through winter now. The wind was beating against the window and causing it to howl out, like a crying soul. That sound had never been one to comfort anyone, more like one to make people shiver twice as much as they were from the cold.

Kagome didn't wish to hear such agonizing sounds so she pulled the blanket over her head and closed her eyes. She began reciting a poem that she used to here her mother say on some nights.

"Beloved come and save me from my misery.

Save me from this horror,

This night of cold and creepy feelings.

I don't want to be alone.

I don't want to cry on my own.

I'm shedding what's left of my hope,

What's left of my bliss...

If only I could see you just once more

Just one more kiss

My limbs are tired and sore.

But to be near you and by your side

To be holding hands with you

Where you and I both collide

That would be my blissful sea

Beloved come and save me from my misery." (I created that poem just now...) Kagome finished and felt a little calmer than before. Though, that poem was a tad depressing, it still made her feel more secure. After all misery loves company and that poem was Kagome company.

No more crying on such nights. Kagome didn't like to sit and cry before falling asleep. It caused her to feel uncomfortable, because the tears dried on her face.

Kagome went to try and finally fall asleep, but she felt a pain in her stomach again. She flinched, because it was so sudden and then she groaned, trying to stop it from continuing. She wanted to beg her child to stop, but it was not listening... apparently.

Kagome could sleep with this feeling, so she wanted something to make her head stop aching at least. She moved to covers aside and start swaggering out of the room. She walked straight towards the bathroom and when she entered she turned on the light and opened up the medicine cabinet. The aspirin sat, more obvious than the other medicines.

She moved her hand towards it and pulled it out popping the cap. After pouring two unto her hand she grabbed a little cup and filled it with sink water. Tossing the pills in her mouth she gulped them back with the water.

Sighing she closed the aspirin and put it back in the cabinet. She figured that would hold her over for now. She really didn't like the thought of taking medicine, while she was pregnant, but she figured since the child was - after all - a demon, that it would not be harmed, but such minor tablets.

Kagome made her way back towards her room and this strange feeling automatically began to course through her. It was something familiar, but at the same time not...

She was about to walk past the stairs, but stopped and looked down them. Her eyes widened as fear engulfed her. She knew exactly what this was. Someone was in there home. Some human... Her heart felt like it stopped for a second. Someone was breaking in.

Kagome went to run, but remembered where she was. She could not just leave her family behind. She would have to face this problem all on her own. She went in her room and came out with a bat in her hand.

Cautiously she began to make her way down the stairs, looking from left to right. Her head turned in a heart beat when she noticed a shadow move from the side of her eye. She was shivering out of fear. She would never be able to handle herself against someone in her condition. An overwhelming desire to have Inuyasha there over came her. Yes, he would have protected her and her family.

When Kagome held movement behind her she turned quickly with the bat and screamed loudly as she swung it with her eyes closed.

"Ahh!" She screamed out.

BAM

"OWE!" She heard someone yell. That voice. It was familiar.

After another second a light switch turned on from the stairs. Kagome looked over to see her tired mother standing there.

"What's all the noise about?" The woman asked, rubbing her eyes.

"Mom..." Kagome turned to look and see who the invader was. Her eyes went larger as she saw a human Inuyasha leaning down and rubbing his head. "Inuyasha..."

"Why the hell did you do that?" Inuyasha asked. Kagome gulped, not knowing what to do. She heard something from the stairs and watched her mother turn and go back upstairs.

"Inuyasha, why are you here?" Kagome asked.

"I came to see you! You haven't come back in two cycles..." He seemed saddened by this, as if he thought it was his fault. In a way it sort of was, but Kagome didn't see it that way. She just didn't want him to know about her pregnancy, but now she had no other choice.

"Inuyasha, I think we need to talk."

"Sure." Inuyasha replied, finishing rubbing the bump on his head. He followed Kagome over to the couch and sat down a few feet beside her.

"I... don't think we can be near each other anymore." She said nonchalantly. Inuyasha looked at her in incredulity. That had been a little 'unexpected', if that was the right word for it.

"W... what do you mean?"

"There's something really important I need to tell you. Please don't be mad, because I'm not holding you responsible or anything. You don't ever have to see me or it at all."

"It...?" Inuyasha was a little to naive to understand right away what exactly she was saying, but it was starting to clear up for him in that mind of his. "What do you mean 'you or it'?"

"I mean I'm going to have a baby..."

For those who read on FictionPress I am now writing stories on the site under the user name JLV so check it out!

I'm going to leave you hanging here, because I know how much you all just love cliff hangers! I can be cruel, but I can be pleasant as well.