A/N: Hello all! Thanks for reviewing! Okay so, one of the reviewer said that they didn't know which Pride I was talking about; and that completely fine! But I'm talking about Pride!Ed. Which bring me to my next point, someone asked what Pride was, and I'm going to tell you. Pride is nothing more them a product of Edward's insanity. Oh and one more thing…I liked the little comment about fanart bunnies hehe. That would be really cool if someone did that! But that's all!

Warnings: Therapy, confessions, language, and hypnosis

Entry #4

Journal Entry #4 – June 16: I had that dream again, but this time it was worse. This time, Envy actually…'touched' me. But, I told myself that I wanted…more. I mean in my dream! Why is this happening now? Why Envy? Of ALL people, why Envy? This could explain why I attacked Roy yesterday. I did really hurt him, I just tackled him. I didn't like the way he was touching Envy! Roy is a fucking pervert, he shouldn't be touching anyone! Why the hell an I getting so upset? This is so frustrating! I feel like pulling out my hair, which I won't do, because it took my ass years to grow it! GOD DAMMIT! NOW I'M JUST GOING ON A TANGENT! I really need to get my priorities straight.

Edward let out a yell, as he threw his journal against the wall. He didn't like feeling like this. His entire life was spiraling out of control, and there was nothing he could do about it. Edward swung his legs over the side of the bed, and walked over to his dresser. Seeing that he had to leave in about an hour, Edward decided to take a shower. He just felt so filthy; it probable had something to do last night. He opened the second drawer, and pulled out a pair of blue jeans, along with a long-sleeved, dark blue shirt. Closing it, he kneeled down and opened the last drawer, and pulled out a fresh pair of boxers. Edward was about the place the clothing on his bed, but someone knocked on his door.

'Please don't be Envy.' Edward held his breath, as he waited for a voice to come.

"Sweetie, are you okay in there? I heard something hit the wall."

The blonde let out a sigh; it was his mother.

"I'm okay, I just got a little angry that's all." He called back.

"Oh. Well we have to leave in an hour, so would you mind waking your brother up?" She asked.

Edward became silent. He really had no intention of going into Envy's room, but his mother asked him, so he had to do it.

"S-sure. I-I'll do it's after my shower."

Trisha noticed the slight stuttered in Edward's speech, but chose to ignore it.

"That's fine."

Edward let out another sigh, as his mother left. This was not going to be a good week for him, not at all. Edward opened the door, and stepped out; bringing the clothes he was going to wear with him. He walked into the bathroom, and closed the door. Edward began to pull of his pajamas, starting with his shirt. He pulled it off, and discarded it to the floor. Next was his boxers; he pulled then down and tossed them to the side. The blonde then removed his hair tie, letting his golden locks go free.

"You look good, for someone so scrawny, Edward."

"I'm not fucking scrawny, Pride!" Edward shouted back.

Feeling a little self-conscious, Edward looked at himself in the mirror. He did look a little pale, but by no means, did he look scrawny.

"Envy looks better then me." He said softly.

Edward quickly clapped his hands over his mouth. Where did that come from?

'I DO NOT like Envy in that way!'

"Pride, go away!"

"Fine, but I'll be back."

Edward tilted his head up, and let the jet stream hit his face. The heat felt good against his face. He slowly ran his hands down his body. He really wounded if anybody had ever seen him as attractive. Edward didn't think he looked drop-dead-gorgeous, he mostly thought he looked okay.

'Envy could never see in 'that' way.'

While pondering his thoughts, one of Edward's hands made it way down to his groin. Then, Edward made the mistake of visualizing Envy lying on his bed, naked. Edward couldn't take it anymore, he needed relief.

'God, I shouldn't be doing this.'

"Then you should stop, Edward"

"I t-thought I told you to l-leave?"

"And I said that I would be back."

Edward let out a moan.

"G-get out."

"Aww, is someone about to come?" Pride said in a child like tone.

"S-shut-."

Edward's breath hitched, as he came into his hand. He pressed his forehead against the tiled wall, trying to catch his breath. Pride stepped forward and sneered, crossing his arms.

"You disgust me, Edward."

"Fuck o-of."

Once Edward had finally completed his shower, he got dressed. The blond didn't feel any cleaner though, actually he felt worse. He shouldn't have thought about Envy, while jerking off. Walking out of the bathroom, he made his way to Envy's room. Edward knocked at first, but not getting and answer, he walked in. The sins room was messy. Clothes were scattered everywhere on the floor. Edward maneuvered his way to Envy's bed; he only slipped once on a dirty shirt. Envy was curled up underneath his blanket, tightly holding it.

"Envy, wake up." Edward said in a low tone.

The sin just groaned, and turned over facing way from Edward. The blonde reached over, and began to yank the blanket away from Envy.

"Come on Envy, wake up!" He said louder.

Edward gave one last pull, and successfully pulled the blanket away from Envy. Once he did, he soon regretted it. Edward had forgotten that Envy sometimes had the tendency to sleep shirtless, which he was currently. Edward couldn't pry his eyes away from the sins naked torso. Envy, still asleep, tried to feel around for his blanket. Once he came in contact with something, that something being Edward's shirt, he yanked him forward. Edward couldn't stop the blush from creeping across his face, as Envy held him close. He had to do something, and fast, if he wanted to get out of this without a nosebleed.

"E-Envy, wake up dammit!" He practically screamed.

Envy groaned again, as he cracked his eyes open.

"Uh…Ed…what are you doing here?" Envy asked, still half asleep.

"I was trying to wake your lazy ass up! Now let me go!"

Envy released Edward, letting the blonde quickly remove himself from the sins bed.

"We're leaving in an half an hour." Edward said.

The blonde looked away, as Envy stretched.

"Okay, but are you sure you can go today? You look kinda sick."

Edward gave him a confused look.

"What are you talking about?"

"You're completely red, and you're sweating." Envy commented.

Edward didn't say anything; he just headed for the door. One, he didn't want to look at Envy anymore, for a nosebleed was starting to make its presence known, and two, he didn't want anymore dirty images in his head.

"Hay Ed, you can tell me anything, especially if something's bothering you." Envy said with a smile

Edward just nodded as he left the room. He couldn't very well tell Envy that he was fantasizing about him, hell, he never would.

'I really, really hate my life.'

"Is something the matter Sweetie?"

Edward hesitated to open the door to his therapist. His hands were shaking; he really didn't want to do this. He swallowed hard, and opened the door. He walked in, and closed the door behind him. Hawkeye was already waiting for him. She was sitting in her usually spot, with her legs crossed. Edward let out a sight, and walked over to her.

"Um, before was start, could I ask you something?" Edward said in almost a whisper.

"Sure, go ahead."

"Can…can you not tell my parents about what I say here?"

"Is there some reason why?" she asked.

Edward blushed, and handed her his journal. She opened it, and read the two current entries. Once she was done reading, she closed the journal, and cleared her throat

"Please have a seat." She said calmly.

Edward took a seat on the couch.

"I'm going to try something new with you. I didn't want to at first, seeing that I might run the risk of awaking Pride, but now would be a good time to use it."

Edward really did understand what she was saying, but he went along with it. Hawkeyes instructed him to close his eyes, and relax against the couch cushion. She was going to hypnotize him.

"Okay Edward, you are now going into a deep trance. Once I clap my hands three times, you will come out of the trance, understood?"

"…yes." He responded quietly.

"Let's begin. What do you think about Envy?"

"…I like him….I dream about him…I want him."

"How so?" She asked.

"…I want him to…do 'things' to me…I jerked off in the shower thinking about him today."

"How long have you…'felt' this way?"

"…Since yesterday." He responded.

"Edward, do you love Envy?"

Edward grew silent. Hawkeye noticed the look of pain in the blonde's face. He groaned, gripping his head.

"Edward, are you alright? Say something!"

"Edward's not here right now, hehe."

She was confused at first, but soon caught on. She adjusted he glasses, and cleared her throat.

"Am I talking to Pride then?"

"Yes."

"Why are you torturing Edward; it's not like he's ever done anything to you."

He chuckled.

"I like seeing him suffer, but the prick has hasn't been listing to me! It's that bastards fault!"

"You mean Envy?"

Pride growled at the mere mention of his name, he hated it.

"Edward's body is mine, not his! Edward will be severely punished if he touches Envy, I'll make sure of it." He said in an angered tone.

Hawkeye didn't want to take the conversation any further, so she clapped her hands, causing Edward to wake up. He shot up, and looked over at Hawkeye.

"W-what happened?"

She adjusted her classes once more. Edward lowered his head, and sighed.

"…he's the only one who cares about me."

"Your mother cares very much about you, Edward."

"She afraid of me; afraid of what I might become." He said, as a small tear trickled down his face.

"The only conclusion I can think of is this; you feel strongly about Envy, because he's the one that has ever gotten close to you, from what you've told me. Ever since 'that incident', your parents haven't treated you the same, except for Envy, understand?"

"Yeah, I like him, because he doesn't treat me like a fucking maniac. He treats me like a…" Edward was starting to get choked up.

"Like a brother." She finished for him.

"Yeah."

Envy leaned against the wall, waiting for Edward. Once he heard the door open, he stood up, and crossed his arms.

"So, how'd it go? Mom went to go start the car."

Edward didn't say a word. He just walked over to him, and wrapped his arms around the sins waist. Envy gladly returned the embrace.

'Nii-san, I love you.'

A/N: That's all for chapter 4! MY GRAMMAR SUCKS! DON'T KILL ME!