Thanks to Lomeil, Archer of Darkness and Callie (Yeah, the Snitch was in her hair, and Draco's invisibility cloak will be a family heirloom passed down through the ages) TheScarletSecret, preciousone, and DrunkenBuddie82 (I think I'm going to use your suggestion…yes, definitely, in the next chapter!)
Disclaimer: Would it really be so bad to be in jail? Ah…right…no cable. Well then, I say nay!
and it begins
issalee
"Giiiiiiinnnnnnnyyyyyyyyyyyy…"
Said redhead flipped over on her side and promptly resumed sleeping.
"Giiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnyyyyyyyy!"
She then showed off a very bad finger, and snuggled deep into her covers again. She was dreaming about butterbeer, lots and lots of it. Currently, there was some Firewhiskey getting involved, and two guys in spandex called Xavier and Juan.
"Ginevra!"
Ginny catapulted up, and glared blearily at the intruder. "M'name's Ginny, not Ginevra. Nasty name, bad, bad name…" She fell back onto her bed, only to find that her pillows were gone, and she groaned.
"I just wanted to sleep…this is aggers…(ooh! Ooh! British word! British word!)" She opened her eyes again, and found Colin grinning madly over her. "How did you get up here?"
He lifted his broom from the bedside table, just as Ginny noticed the neon orange fur sprouting on his knuckles. "I, er, flew up here, and as you can see, it still has side effects, and the stairs are still slides. Would you help me?"
Ginny threw off her covers and, yawning widely, found her wand and made Colin's knuckle-fur go away. She then looked through Tessa's trunk for something to wear. The girl was a mine of clothing, and Ginny frankly didn't like much of her clothes either, even if Tessa had given her the new robes she owed her. They were black and dark purple.
"Go on down to the common room, Colin. I'll be down in a sec, ok?" The boy nodded and was halfway out the door before he looked at her, curiosity evident on his face.
"Where were you last night? Ron was mad; he even went as far to say that you were in the Slytherin dorms, with Malfoy." Ginny laughed.
"No way, I was just—in the library, and I lost track of time."
"We looked for you there." Colin still looked doubtful, and Ginny walked over and shoved him. As he slid down the slide, she called down, "I was in the Restricted Section! Wonderful place to hide, am I right?"
Sighing, she closed the door and picked a random outfit from the Tessa-Mine's trunk. Everything in there was all mostly black or white or velvet red or emerald green. Thus, a guaranteed match. Ginny took a quick shower, and changed into her clothes.
"Merlin…" she murmured. She hadn't meant to pick out an outfit like this! Two separate pieces, forest green jeans and a dark green rollover. She grimaced and fingered the fabric of the shirt, which felt like velvet, and although she hated to admit it, she looked good in it. Not to mention green was her favorite color…and she was supposed to go for causal today too…
"Ginny!" Tessa's voice floated up the stairs. "Come on, today's the first prank and we've got to talk about the plan!"
Sighing, Ginny picked up a pair of black ankle boots and grabbed her knapsack, before jumping onto the slide. It was quite fun, actually, and served to make her feel much more cheerful. But as soon as she hit the bottom and saw Ron (who had managed to get Professors Flitwick, Snape, and McGonagall to turn him back) glaring at her in a way that suggested she was in trouble, her mood soured once more.
"Where were you last night, Ginevra?" she didn't answer, instead choosing to look at Harry and wonder why she couldn't get a cool scar like that. And look, there was glitter in his hair still, just like hers…although she suspected that he hadn't washed his hair, just to keep as much of it in as possible.
"Ginevra!"
She looked blankly at her brother, and smiled sweetly. "I'm sorry, but if you're referring to me, my name is Ginny. See, it's quite simple to pronounce. Gin, like the liquor, and e! There, easy isn't it?"
Ron growled. "It's not funny. Where were you last night?" Ginny drooped visibly, and walked up to him. "Brother dear, I know it will take a long time to convince you otherwise, so yes, I was in the Slytherin dorms cuddling with Draco dearest." She patted him on the cheek, grabbed Tessa and Colin, basically took Harry hostage, and wandered out of the room.
Ron looked stunned. "Did she say what I think she said, Hermione?" The bushy-haired girl had to smile and roll her eyes.
"I think she said exactly what you think she said, Ronald, and moreover, I think you were being a bit of a swot (BW! BW!) and you had no reason to go prying about in her life like that. So, then, I'm going down to breakfast with the others, and as they plan and plot without us, I hope I can safely say you will leave them alone and get on with finally finishing your homework." Hermione, quite exhilarated after her little speech, skipped out of the common room.
And poor, poor Ronald Weasley was left in the common room, with his jaw touching the floor.
Ginny Weasley was very determined that morning to soar past even Gred and Forge's reputation. Nothing was going to stop her, not mad brothers, or even petty house rivalries. Which is why, after a whispered conversation with Harry, as the others sat down at the Gryffindor table, she marched over to the Slytherin one.
Blaise saw her coming, and nudged Draco out off his talk with Theodore Nott. "What is it?" The blond asked irritably. Blaise pointed, and in doing so, drew the attention of most of the Slytherin table.
"Make space?" Ginny asked, as she leaned upon the table. They gawped at her, until Blaise grinned. Several thuds were heard as a few girls fell off their benches, and Ginny rolled her eyes. Blaise made way, and she sat down next to him, smiling gratefully.
There was another minor commotion, and Carina pushed the tall, pimply-faced Slytherin next to her and sat down. When he grunted in anger, she rolled her eyes and glared at him. "Pipe down, Eldon, I'll be just a moment. Not like I want to sit next to either of these two dorks, anyway." She looked pointedly at Draco and Blaise, who shrugged off her insults.
Ginny took this chance to talk. "I trust you all received your owls?" they all nodded indecipherably, and Ginny didn't let her gaze linger too long on Draco as she sped forth. "Good. Now we need codenames, which need to be discussed privately."
Draco waved a hand in a slightly organized motion, and every Slytherin within three feet backed off and crowded around another section of the table. A little first year that had been sitting next to his older brother gazed impertinately at him.
"Watchoo make Freddy move for?"
Draco glared at him. "Because I would like to have a conversation, you little snot-nosed twit." The twit in question picked at his food.
"I ain't done eatin' yet."
"Does it look like I care?" Ginny had to admit, she didn't want to break this fight up, and Blaise and Carina were enjoying it also. So she didn't.
"Watchoo gonna do if I don' move, pasty-face?" She had to stifle a snort at that one, and Draco seemed to be restraining himself.
"Listen, you can come back and eat later, ok? I'm just talking to these people for a moment. Put yourself in my position; it's very annoying what you're doing."
The boy did an excellent impression of Draco's sneer, and by this time, every table had quieted down and looked over.
"I've tried putting myself in your position, but my head doesn't go that far up my arse!" That did it. Ginny and Carina slumped against each other in laughter, and Blaise almost slid under the table. The Gryffindors were applauding loudly, as were the other tables, and Draco looked fit to burst.
"Shut your bloody hole!" The first year crossed his arms and stood up. "Make me, arse-hole!" The word had never before sent Ginny into such rocking laughing spasms, and Draco glared at her, but turned back to the first year afterwards.
"You don't mess with Malfoys, you swotty brat!" The boy stuck out his tongue.
"Nyah! An' what're you gonna do 'bout it? Tell your mommy to come and beat me up? I'm sure she could, with her wonderfully huge basoomers, I'd be knocked out in a moment!"
In that instant, the Great Hall stilled. Several people (read: everyone but Draco and Ginny) wanted to laugh, but kept ended up holding their tongues as the blond Slytherin's cool mask slipped over his face.
"What's your name?" He asked, the picture of calmness. Ginny kicked him in his shin under the table, but he didn't even flinch. The first year answered snootily.
"Name's Ima Harsehole." Draco let a smirk come over his features, which were still stony. "Well, the name speaks for itself. Listen, 'Harsehole', I've got no time for you or your disgustingly immature insults." He got out from the bench, and turned around one last time. "Oh, and you should try to keep those in."
"Keep what—" Ima started to say, but all of a sudden, his—er—chest started to grow. And grow…and grow…and they didn't stop until his man-boobs were threatening to rip his shirt open, by which time Draco had left.
By the time Ginny had managed to stop laughing and Ima had been carted off by some teachers (who had been enjoying the insult contest until the—er, man-boobs came in) she was rather frantic. Carina and Blaise had picked out codenames…and she needed to find Draco before first period!
With a sad look at the plate of food (Draco's) that she could have been eating, she got up and slipped out of the Great Hall, which was filled with discussion on The Battle Of The Basoomers, as they so intelligently called it.
It was very, very hard to find Draco, and in Ginny's mind, a complete waste of time. He was sitting by the lake, with his knees pulled up to his chest and his robes discarded next to him. Ginny noted the relaxed atmosphere and dropped her robes by a tree as she walked next to him.
"Er…Malfoy?"
He didn't say word, which made Ginny feel a bit irritable, but she forgave him because he had just been in a very unfair fight. First years have barbed tongues…
"Do you hate me?" The question was rather simple, but it threw the redhead way off balance. She had to lean against a willow tree's trunk as she pondered this answer. If she came up with a deep and mellow answer, maybe he'd be happy (or sullen, as close to cheerful as a Malfoy could get) and they could GET A MOVE ON with things already.
"Er—yes." Draco turned around and looked at her strangely, and she began sputtering. "It's not that I hate you—it's just—well you aren't—you're EVIL—and Ron—" A sound startled her and she looked down at her shoes to see if maybe she was stepping on a first year or something, but after a moment, she recognized it as laughter—coming from Draco!
"Are you—alright?" She asked hesitantly, which sent him off even more, and Ginny gaped for a moment before glaring. "Oh, you're just fabulous, you know that? I had to sacrifice breakfast for you and everything, and just so I can learn your codename, and now I'm hungry and we've got class in fifteen minutes and—WHY ARE YOU STILL LAUGHING!"
Draco stood up, legs trembling, and grabbed her around the waist. She shrieked a little (read: like a bloody banshee) as he spun her around. "What's your codename?"
Ginny, as she tried to make a desperate bid for freedom, told him. "Ah, Fireball!" Draco fell to his knees, taking her with him, and shook his head.
"You're hilarious, d'you know that?"
She hissed at him.
"I'll be Dragon, then." He pulled Ginny's hair back from her face with a hand and she huffed. "And don't be too upset, Weasley. You don't know how funny you look dressed in Slytherin colors and acting like a Slytherin, and yet you're in Gryffindor."
He grinned, and although she tried to hide it, one made its way to her face as well. "Ah, but we have class in what, ten minutes now?" Draco nodded, and let her go. She quickly pulled her robes on, and started for the school, but stopped as the blond Slytherin grabbed her wrist.
"Is this an alliance of sorts?"
"What? Between all of us planning this thing?" Draco shook his head.
"Between you and me, Weasley." She eyed him for a moment, and then checked the area, looking for Gred and Forge to pop out and say "Gotcha!" while the Draco-bot they made exploded in confetti.
It didn't happen.
Ginny sighed, and looked back at Draco. "Yes, I suppose so. But just an alliance!" Draco nodded, a smirk forming on his lips.
"Of course, Weaselette. Nothing more." And he brushed by her, leaving Ginny red-faced and missing the warmth of his hand—but just a little bit.
"Are you in position, Fireball?"
Silence.
"Eh, Fireball?"
"Harry, put the bloody thing down, I'm right next to you."
"But it's fun! OW! Ginny, don't hit me with your sack! Bad. Bad Ginny!" Harry held his arms over his head as Ginny giggled, and Tessa rolled her eyes.
"We should really be getting into position now. It took me and Gin forever to charm these walkie-talkies to work, and me and Colin even longer to teach the Zabinis how to use it."
"And Malfoy?" Harry asked absently, as he ran a finger through his hair and smiled at the glitter that it came out with.
"He already knew." Tessa smiled at the shocked faces. "I know, I know, I was going mad too. But he just mumbled some stuff about his 'crazy father' and shuffled off to his position."
"He can shuffle?" Blaise said thoughtfully. Ginny sighed.
"Come on, guys, it's almost lunch, and we've got to do this now. Everyone, get in your positions!" She poked Harry in the ribs. "Stop staring at the glitter, that means you too."
They followed her orders, and Ginny clambered onto the shoulders of a statue of a naked man, kneeling and thinking. She patted his head awkwardly.
"Um…hello…I suppose you're doing something, but I may have to be animating you soon, so finish quickly…"
"Gods, Ginny, stop trying to get off with the statue." The redhead glared at her walkie-talkie, where Carina's voice had come from.
"Ah, shut your bloody hole and keep a look-out. Harry, do you see them?" There was a pause, and she ground her teeth. "Harry! Put the damn finger down and check to see if they're here!"
There was a crackle, and Harry's voice came on. "Sorry, Gin, but it's so…sparkly. And yes, they're heading down the hallway. Malfoy, you know what to do?"
"Yeah, keep you knickers on, Potty." There was a clicking noise, and then Draco's voice could be heard, but faintly.
"Ooh, Professor! Professor, the Creevey git—er, boy, is hexing Carina Zabini! Blaise is fending him off, but he's got Reeve and I think Connors on their way!"
"Lead the way, Draco. And you, Crabbe, just follow me." Snape's voice emanated clearly. Ginny shrank against the statue and watched closely as Draco turned the corner. Professor Snape and Crabbe following close behind him.
From the corner of her eye, Ginny could see Carina standing with her wand lying forlornly on the ground. Her hair was neon orange, as was her brother's. Tessa, Justin, and Colin were all holding their wands and pointing them at the brother and sister.
"Stop right there!" Snape called out, pushing past Draco with Crabbe in tow running towards the children, who were picking themselves up and moving back.
Ginny waited until they were directly beneath her before whispering the words. "Animatus!" The statue gave a mighty heave, and the people below it stopped and looked up. Ginny slid down its back and crouched in the shadows, giving whispered commands.
The statue picked up Snape and Crabbe and held them both in the palm of its right hand. Ginny whispered another word, and they were instantly knocked out.
"Well done!" She smiled as her fellow plotters joined her. "Phase Two of Objective: Capture the Flag is done and over with!"
"Who's doing Phase Three?" Draco wrinkled his nose, and Ginny shrugged.
"That, my friends, is for whoever's brave enough to get to Crabbe's knickers." There was a long silence, before every single person turned to the one they thought capable.
"Harry!"
The Great Hall was filled for lunch, as usual, and it was halfway finished when there was a commotion at the door. This proved to be Harry Potter stalking in, wiping his hands with a wet handkerchief and grumbling angrily to those surrounding him, which surprisingly included Draco Malfoy, Blaise Zabini, and Carina Zabini.
Ronald Weasley was amongst them, but after a kick to the shins from Hermione, he shut his mouth and poked sullenly at his food.
But they all quickly got over it as everyone went to their own separate tables and sat down. That is, until the Hall started shaking. The doors burst open, and a giant, at least ten-foot tall man in the nude wandered up to the front of the teacher's table.
"Methinks they belong to you," it said, in a slightly girlish voice, and deposited its package on the floor. No one noticed it lumber away. All eyes were on the 'package' it had dropped.
Severus Snape was clutching Vincent Crabbe's rear end with a hand, and his arms were around the teacher's neck. Both of them had messy hair and mussed robes, and Snape had lipstick marks all over his face. They were in a position that suggested they were lying down before something had frozen them.
But the clincher was that in Snape's other hand, the one that seemed to be coming from the direction of an opening in Crabbe's robes was a pair of frilly red panties. Snape groaned, and opened his eyes, with Crabbe following soon after.
There was a pause, as they both looked at each other. Then Crabbe, in a voice that was obviously not his own, stated clearly enough for the hall to hear. "Sevvy, maybe we should have these encounters in a more—private area!"
And thus began the greatest War against Hogwarts pupils and teachers that Hogwarts had ever known.
And I--am a genius. No, but seriously, I'd just like to thank everyone reviewing. And if anyone wants to see Draco in the shower...well, next chapter, I'll set something up/