Welcome back my children to another episode…err Chapter of "You Wish". Now on to the show.
Disclaimer: I don't own Fruits basket or any of the characters…if I did they would surely hate me…oh so much.
Ch.6: When life gives you Comas, Make LemonadeThe sun had begun to lower itself in the sky and shadows began to creep out over the landscape of the Sohma estate as Sarah and Ashley finished recalling their "date" with Akito to the other teens. The group of youths was gathered on the porch of Hatori's house in the main house. "And then we called Hatori-san in…and he got kind of mad and told us to go outside and wait for Shigure" Sarah concluded as she smoothed down some of her wild post fighting hair. All the others could do was stare on in shock and disbelief at the story they had just been told.
It amazed the three Sohma boys that anyone, especially two dingbat girls could possibly take down their powerful and short-tempered god…it certainly gained them a lot more respect in the Sohmas' eyes. Kristen buried her head in her hands as she tried to grasp the severity of the situation at hand "oh great…just perfect. We find ourselves stuck in some weird alternate universe and the first thing you two idiots due is commit a crime…possibly a felony, we'll be minced meat!" Kristen groaned as she stood up hastily. Tohru seemed a little put off by her statement "uh…um…Kristen-kun what do you mean minced meat? I-I don't understand" Tohru asked timidly as her embarrassment of not knowing shone in bright pink across her cheeks.
Kristen turned to Tohru and was about to continue on with her harsh passionate rampage but decided against it in favor of not upsetting the sweet little brunette. "Look…they beat that poor guy into a coma…if he dies or suffers brain damage the Sohmas could press charges and have us all imprisoned! And then once they realize we aren't citizens and don't have passports we'll be deported and sent to some penitentiary in a far off land where we'll be beat and murdered brutally" Kristen stated in a eerily calm voice.
Tohru's eyes widened fearfully and the girl began to panic "oh no! That would be awful! Don't worry Sarah-kun, Ashley-kun…I'm sure Akito-san will be fine and he'll forgive you once you explain your situation…I'm sure it wont be as bad as all that you just have to have faith" Tohru exclaimed as she grabbed the two girls' hands determinedly. Yuki sweat dropped and placed a comforting hand on Tohru's shoulder "please Honda-san calm down…I'm sure everything will work out fine" Yuki said in his best calm princely voice as he spared Tohru a rare genuine smile. Tohru ceased her rambling and blushed as she realized how close Yuki had gotten with his hand on her shoulder, Yuki noticed her blush and then realized he was touching her and quickly withdrew his hand from her shoulder, blushing.
Ashley bit her bottom lip nervously "well…maybe it wont be so bad. I mean we wont get arrested if it was in self defense" the dark haired girl shrugged as she looked to her older cousin. Sarah nodded in agreement as Kristen merely shook her head as she propped up her elbow on Kyou's shoulder and leaned on him, Kyou went stiff at the sudden contact and stared at Kristen in shock.
"Well maybe Sarah wont get arrested but Ash, we're black! Of course we'll go to jail" Kristen rolled her eyes and ignored Kyou's silent panicked stare. Ashley's mouth dropped and she looked to Sarah for advice but the blonde simply shrugged "she's got a point though" Sarah chimed in, Haru and Yuki nodded in agreement. Ashley sweat dropped "I can't believe you guys…I mean we're in Japan not L.A! How can you be so pessimistic" Ashley sighed as she looked over everyone in the group.
Sarah stood between Kristen and Ashley and grinned widely "no problem buddy! That's what we're here for!" Sarah beamed as she playfully slapped both girls on the back causing Kristen to lose balance on the step and fall onto Kyou. "Oh Snap!" Kristen yelped as she connected hard with Kyou's upper body on the ground POOF! The others turned away and winced as the tell tale explosion occurred leaving Kristen face flat on the grass coughing in the orange smoke as a small orange cat struggled to squirm out from beneath her torso.
"Get the hell off me!" the cat growled as Kristen lay there coughing "oh quit being such a crybaby you stupid cat" Yuki mumbled with disgust as he grabbed Kyou by the scruff of his neck and yanked him from beneath Kristen.
Kyou hissed at Yuki and scratched his wrist angrily causing Yuki to curse and toss Kyou over into a bush. Kristen pushed herself up to her knees and sat hunched over looking at the ground "why…why does Jesus hate me?" she sobbed dramatically as she thrust her arms toward the heavens "I've never done anything horrible! I've been a good Protestant!" Kristen pleaded as she shook her head towards the sky, earning her strange looks from the others.
Tohru cocked her head to the side and looked down at Kristen "but Kristen-kun, I thought you were Buddhists" Tohru chirped innocently causing Yuki, Haru, and Kristen to sweat drop. Ashley shook her head and laughed, "No we aren't. And Kristen you know very well we're catholic" Ashley stated as she shook her head at Kristen "oh yeah…I forgot" Kristen groaned as she slumped forward against the ground in hopeless exacerbation. Sarah snorted "sheesh. Can't even remember your own religious affiliation. No wonder god hates you…" Sarah mumbled as she crossed her arms over her chest.
Kristen turned her head upward to glare at Sarah "look…I've had just about enough of you blondie" Kristen grunted in frustration, Sarah gasped in offense "well! At least Jesus still loves me," Sarah teased as she stuck out her tongue at Kristen. The caramel skinned girl gritted her teeth "that's it!" Kristen growled as she rolled to her side and thrust her right leg towards Sarah's abdomen and kicked her into a nearby bush. "Ahh! Ow! Branch! Ow! Help! Ow! Jeez!" Sarah cried out as she thrashed helplessly in the bush trying to get up
"Serves you right" Kristen smirked as she rose to her knees and smoothed out her ruffled skirt just as Kyou (still in cat form) leapt from out of the currently occupied bush and unintentionally into Ashley's arms. "Crazy woman!" Kyou hissed from Ashley's startled arms, Tohru immediately began to panic and attempt to help pull Sarah up. "ACHOO!" Ashley sneezed suddenly causing her whole body to tremble "aw crap it! Kyou-kun you know I'm allergic to kitties" the girl sighed as she tossed Kyou over towards Haru and Yuki. Although unfortunately for Kyou the exact time Ashley tossed him into the air was when his body decided to change back, "why me…" Yuki mumbled as he watched with helpless exacerbation as the now very human and very naked Kyou came hurling towards him.
"What in the DEVIL IS GOING ON HERE!" came a sudden booming voice from the top of the steps causing all eyes to turn toward the owner of said voice. It was Hatori and by the looks of it he was not very amused by the antics of the seven teens. By now Tohru had successfully helped Sarah out of the bush and was looking up at the elder Sohma quite exhausted and flushed "uhh…err…H-Hatori-san! Um…we can explain!" Tohru pleaded excitedly as Sarah brushed the twigs from her hair. "Oh I certainly hope so, because from the looks of it…this must be quite an interesting story" came a new voice from the dirt path leading to the house. Hatori felt a new surge of pain course through his temples at the sound of that "oh-so-familiar" voice.
"Oh great! What are you doing here you perverted mutt?" Kyou grumbled irately from his current spot on the ground sitting on top of a dazed Hatsuharu and a nearly suffocated and pissed Yuki. As attention was drawn to Kyou, he (and everyone else) was reminded of the fact that he was indeed very…very naked. "For kami sake…" Hatori mumbled in blatant disgust as he turned his eyes away from the exposed redhead, Tohru squeaked feebly and fainted. Luckily Ashley caught her, but unluckily for them Ashley also lost he footing and fell backward onto her butt "ow! My poor butt" the dark skinned girl whined. Sarah's mouth gaped at Kyou in all his naked glory then suddenly her small pale hand flew up to cover her nose as a familiar crimson liquid began to gush forth from her nostrils.
"Bathroom" the blue eyed schoolgirl piped up before jetting up the stairs and into the house in search of the before mentioned facility. Shigure could hardly stifle his laughter as he turned away slightly, "get off of me you disgusting cat!" Yuki nearly growled in a strained breath as he tried to force Kyou to get up by pushing Haru into his back. All it took was the feel of Kyou's naked rear against Haru's pelvic bone to spring both boys up and away from each other as fast as possible. Haru scrambled away backwards and clutched his stomach "I think I'm gonna be sick" the ox commented dryly as he scrunched up his nose in distaste.
Kyou scrambled into a cross-legged position and did his best to cover his "valuables" with his hands as he tried to force down a very humorous yet slightly adorable full body blush. "That goes double for me burger boy!" Kyou snapped in reply to Haru. Yuki simply rose to his feet and turned away from the both of them in cold disgust as Shigure was nearly rolling with laughter. Hatori massaged his temples as he looked upwards into the clouds "please Kyou…put on some clothing" the stoic doctor suggested in an emotionally drained tone that let the whole world know that it was way over due for this physician to take a sabbatical.
"Aww…but Haa-san, I think Kyou-kun seems to rather enjoy this new exhibitionist persona" Shigure commented as he tried hard to control his mirth, "maybe this year for a summer trip we could visit a nudist colony…I'm sure our little kitty would be right at home…bwahahaha!" Shigure lost all composure as he began to tear up with laughter at his own poor joke.
"Shut Up!" Kyou hissed angrily. Suddenly Kyou looked up to see a pair of lean tanned legs only a foot in front of him, Kristen rolled her eyes "here" she sighed as she dropped a pile of his clothing that had been shed after he transformed. "Put 'em on before you catch a cold or get arrested," she said with a shrug as she stepped back to allow him room to rise up. Kyou bowed his head to try and hide the blush "thanks…" he mumbled as he rose to his feet and began slipping on his underwear. Meanwhile Kristen had walked over to Ashley and Tohru and was trying to help the newly conscious Tohru to her feet. "Are you ok To-Chan?" Ashley asked the girl as she rubbed her back soothingly, Tohru nodded and wobbled slightly on her feet as she shook the daze from he mind.
"You done yet?" Kristen asked as she looked over to Kyou who had just gotten his underwear on and was now attempting to pull up and zip his pants. Kyou jumped at her voice and looked up with a startled blush as he dropped his pants in the process "hey! Quit looking over here! Hentai!" he growled gruffly as he pulled his pants back up hastily. Kristen rolled her eyes "oh please! Don't flatter yourself red. I have 2 little brothers and 5 male cousins…you don't have anything I haven't seen before" Kris said coolly causing Hatori, Haru, and Yuki to crack a small grin. Kyou shot them his dirtiest look "shut up" he barked as he pulled on his white under shirt.
After a few moments of Kyou getting dressed Hatori cleared his throat loudly to call attention to himself "Now that we're all decent I think it's time that we take this conversation inside" the dragon suggested as he gestured to his house. The others nodded and trudged in at their own pace.
Once they were inside Hatori and Shigure sat down near his desk while the younglings all stood in uncomfortable silence, Kristen looked around and the uncomfortable slightly annoyed face of the others as everyone waited for someone to speak. Finally Kristen scrunched her eyes shut and let out a low growling sound "I can't take this any more!" Ashley finally blurted out causing all eyes to fall on her. Ashley stalked over to Hatori's desk and slammed her palms down dramatically on the smooth surface, "this silence is killing me! Look we all know about what Sarah did to Akito…so just give us our punishment and be done with it! This waiting game is torture!" the girl whined as she through herself onto the desk.
Shigure and Hatori nearly jumped out of their seats as she lay slumped forward on the desk before them. Suddenly a very pissed looking Sarah walked up behind Ashley and kicked her hard in the rear causing Ashley to yelp and jump up from the desk. "What do you mean 'what Sarah did to Akito'? If I do recall you're the idiot who kicked Akito in the gut and got her all worked up in the first place!" Sarah hissed at Ashley as the darker girl rubbed her sore butt. Ashley glared at Sarah hard "So! You're the one who knocked Akito's lights out with the vase!" Ashley taunted back as she shoved her friend backwards.
Sarah fell back into Kristen causing them both to fall back on Kristen's butt "but I was only doing it to protect you!" Sarah snapped back defensively as she jumped off of Kristen's lap. Ashley looked up at Sarah and frowned slightly "I know…I'm sorry!" Ashley wailed as she threw herself at Sarah and hugged her friend tight, Sarah was shocked at first but after a moment she hugged her back and smiled "ok" she said cheerfully. Kristen, Kyou, and Yuki all rolled their eyes sweat dropped while Shigure, Haru and Hatori simply shook their heads, Kristen turned to Hatori "may I borrow your bag for a second?" she asked suddenly.
The doctor was so stunned by the random question that all he could do was nod so with that Kristen grabbed Hatori's bag and then grabbed Ashley and Sarah by their uniform collars and dragged them out of the office shutting the door. "Um…what was that all about" Haru asked bit put out by the whole situation, but all the others could do was shrug helplessly. After a few minutes Kristen slid the door open triumphantly and stepped into the room with a loud sigh of relief "well…now that that's taken care of we can have a civilized conversation" the brown haired girl said calmly as she crossed her arms over her chest.
Shigure scooted his chair closer to Hatori's chair out of slight fear of the thin high school girl, "where are Sarah-kun and Ashley-kun?" Tohru asked curiously. Kristen turned to look at Tohru and smiled a wide and creepy grin "oh they're out here…come in girls and sit down quietly" she called out of the door. Suddenly Sarah and Ashley came shuffling in sadly with their heads hung low, which wasn't quiet as strange as the fact that their hands were behind their backs and bound by surgical tape as well as their mouths. Tohru gasped in horror "oh my! Are they alright?" she asked worriedly "what the hell did you do to them you psycho?" Kyou asked in a rather disturbed voice.
Kristen tossed Hatori's bag over on to his desk and smiled "thanks for the bag…don't worry about those chuckle heads…they'll be fine" Kristen said with a wave of her hand.
"Ok…look. First of all Shigure-san I want to say I'm very grateful for you allowing us to stay with you…we really appreciate your help" Kristen said with a polite bow towards Shigure. "And I'm sorry for all the trouble we have caused you Hatori-san…and we promise that if you will refrain from taking legal action…we will pay you back for any damages we've caused…you have my word of honor as a Woman" Kristen finished up her declaration with a second bow.
Hatori and Shigure were a bit loss for words as they looked back at each other and then at Kristen and then at their younger cousins and Tohru. "Well…what do you think Haa-san? I think the girl sounds sincere" Shigure said with a cool shrug "and besides…from what I hear it was self defense" Shigure added with a sly grin. Hatori watched this look of perverse amusement flash in the eyes of his childhood friend and frowned, he never could tell what Shigure was thinking but he had a feeling that he probably didn't want to know anyway.
Hatori sighed in defeat and looked up at Kristen "alright. It did seem to be in self defense….judging by the defensive wounds on Ashley-kun and Sarah-kun. And Akito isn't in any serious danger…besides being in a seemingly comatose state…so I will allow you three to stay with the Sohmas for the time being" Hatori reasoned. Ashley and Sarah both began cheering and yelling in muffled voices under their tape, Kristen smiled and sighed in relief "thank you Hatori-san…I promise you personally that I will keep an eye on those two dorks" Kristen promised as she bowed graciously. Hatori nodded and looked over at the two bound and gagged girls as they tried to jump up and down for joy but merely succeeded in falling over.
"Hey Tori! I was wondering if you'd seen my candy necklace I bought yesterday…" Momiji asked as he skipped into the room, the bunny boy stopped when he noticed the it was filled with lots of familiar faces as well as a bound and gagged Ashley and Sarah wriggling on the ground like a fish out of water. "Wow! Why is everyone here so suddenly? Was there some kind of meeting no one told me about? Huh? Huh? I wanted to be involved too! How mean not to invite me…oh Hi Tohru! How are you?" Momiji babbled on excitedly as he hopped around happily, curious to find out why all his friends were there.
"And what the Yankee Doodle is up with that kid?" Kristen asked as she looked to Ashley for the answer, Ashley simply grunted at her and Kristen rolled her eyes in annoyance before reaching down and ripping the tape from Ashley and Sarah's mouths. "Ow! Golly that hurt! Anyway…ehem. Kristen, that is Momiji Sohma. He's 16 years old and of German and Japanese decent. He's also the rabbit of the zodiac" Ashley stated matter-of-factly. "And he's so adorable!" Sarah chimed in and Momiji smiled at her while the others sweat dropped. Kristen nodded "man…this family is freaking huge…and I thought black people and Jewish people had big families…" Kristen mumbled to herself as she undid the binds around the two girls' wrists.
Once Sarah and Ashley were freed Ashley stretched and yawned "yeah I know…actually the Sohmas are a lot larger still" Ashley said to Kristen as she rubbed her sore wrists, Kristen's mouth gaped "how many Sohmas are there?" she asked in amazement as she looked around the room. Hatori looked over at Ashley curiously, he noticed that she seemed to know an uncomfortably vast amount about the Sohmas and he wanted to see if she'd answer. Ashley smirked at her cousin and then elbowed Sarah in the arm "you take this one" she said slyly, Sarah winked and grinned before clearing her throat and taking a large breath.
"Well…the Sohma family is quite large actually. In the Sohma compound alone there are hundreds of Sohma living here as well as some non family members who know of the curse and therefore live amongst the family" Sara stated in her best oral presentation type voice. "But as far as those that are curse there are exactly 13 members of the family who are cursed with the zodiac spirits…12 zodiac animals plus the cat from the legend of the zodiac" Sarah finished with a bow. Kristen, Tohru, Haru, and Momiji gave her a round of applause as she made her bow, Ashley smiled smugly and draped her arm over Sarah's shoulders "I know…I taught her all she knows" Ashley said proudly as she pretended to wipe a tear from her eye.
"Wow…you sure know a lot about the Sohmas…it's as if you were one of the Sohmas" Tohru said admirably, Sarah smiled and then bowed to Ashley "thank you Sensei…I feel your training has prepared me well for this moment" Sarah said in a mocking voice. Ashley laughed at her and patted her head "that'll do grasshopper…that'll do" she replied jokingly. The girls began laughing and the mood lightened considerably, Kyou and Yuki were both glad for it because they were really starting to get uneasy. But now everything seemed fine and both boys allowed themselves to exhale in relief, "um…excuse me but if you don't mind me asking…why is it that you know so much about the Sohmas?" Hatori asked Ashley suddenly. Ashley stopped laughing and looked at him seriously "Well now…if I told you that I'd have to kill you" Ashley said with a deadly calm tone as she looked him square in the eye.
The others in the room gasped "w-what?" Tohru asked as she began to panic, Ashley looked at Sarah and then at Kristen and laughed "just kidding…ha-ha boy you guys are slow!" Ashley giggled heartily. After a few moments the others joined in with a strained nervous laughter, "well I think it's about time we started heading to Shigure-san's house…I mean we have homework and all" Kristen said suddenly as she looked up at the clock on the wall of the office. Tohru looked up suddenly "Ah! Yes Kristen-kun is right…um…we're very sorry for having to leave so suddenly. Please forgive our rudeness" Tohru said with an apologetic bow. Yuki and Kyou nodded "yeah…let's go…being in this place gives me the creeps" Kyou said with a shudder.
Yuki rolled his eyes at the cat as he began making his way to the exit "well you shouldn't even be here anyway" Yuki said as he walked away, Kyou perked his head up and glared at Yuki's direction "what was that you damn rat?" he sneered as he clenched his fists in preparation for a fight. Yuki ignore him and held out his hand to Tohru "are you ready to go Honda-san?" he asked the brunette with a kind smile, Tohru looked at his hand and blushed "um…y-yes" she replied as she grabbed his hand and allowed herself to be pulled out of the room "goodbye Hatori-san!" she called over her shoulder as her and Yuki left out. "Hey! Don't leave without me!" Kyou yelled back as he ran out after the two teens.
Shigure shook his head in bemusement as Kristen and the other two girls looked around at each other trying to decide what to do. Kristen shrugged and turned to the remaining Sohmas "well…thank you again Hatori-san. And we'll see you later Shigure-san" Kristen said with a bow before turning to a bored looking Haru and a lollipop sucking Momiji. "Nice to meet you Momiji-kun…hopefully we can get to know each other better some other time. And…well…see ya at school Haru-kun" Kristen said with a nod in their direction as she too left the room to go home. Sarah and Ashley both watched her leave and then turned to the others "well…BYE GUYS!" they yelled and with a wave they both sprinted off to catch up to the others.
After the initial shock of their exit Haru sighed and shook his head smiling "well that was odd. Something tells me things are about to get a whole lot more complicate around here…but more fun too" the ox said as he opened up the door leading to the hallway of the house and left to go to his own place. As he left Ashley came skipping back into the office "um…did you forget something Ashley-kun?" Shigure asked curious as to why she had returned so quickly alone. Ashley shook her head and walked over to the desk "you know…it was so sweet of you not to call the po-po on us for beating down Akito-san…and well…gee I just wanted to say I'm really grateful" Ashley said sincerely as she looked down shyly.
Hatori was a little stunned but he gave her a small half smile and nodded "you're welcome… but just make sure that this is the last incident" Hatori said sternly. Ashley nodded and smiled "don't worry…we'll be good…or at least try. You're so awesome I could just hug you!" Ashley squealed as she leaned over the desk. Hatori scooted back in his chair a bit in fear that he may transform, Ashley giggled "but I know I cant….so instead…" she said mischievously as she rested her hands on the desk and leaned further across on her tip-toes. Hatori blinked unsurely just as Ashley leaned down and pressed her lips lightly against the side of Hatori's mouth. Shigure almost chocked on his own tongue as he watch with disbelieving eyes as the girl pulled away from her kiss with Hatori and smiled coyly "here's a thank you kiss…hehe well bye!" she said with a giggle as she turned and ran out of the room.
Hatori was still wide eyed with shock as he brought his hand up to touch the spot where Ashley had left her warm feather like kiss. His cheeks began to heat into a warm reddish color. Shigure caught the look of flushed amazement on his usually emotionless friend and his grin grew a mile long. "Oh my! Haa-san, you do seem to be quite the stud today…hmm looks as if maybe someone has a bit of a Lolita complex…" Shigure teased as he laughed heartily at the doctor's deepening blush. "Shut up you sick pervert" Hatori grumbled as he kicked Shigure's chair away with his foot.
Shigure's chair leaned back from the kick on its back legs before wobbling and toppling over, causing Shigure to land head first on the floor underneath his chair. Momiji looked at the fallen novelist and then at the tomato faced doctor and shook his head "grown ups are so immature" he sighed as he bit into his red and green lollipop and began to exit the room.
T.B.C
A/N: Ok. Here it is…finally! I hope you liked it…I was a little rushed at the end but…oh well hopefully next chapter will be better! So stick around and be patient with me ok? I mean it is summer and I do have stuff I need to do…but don't worry I wont give up on my stories! I promise you all that I'll try harder! So stay with me and please…REVIEW! REVIEW! REVIEW! - Chizz