Matt and Jeff finally got me to leave the room…I went to the arena with them later that night…I stayed in their dressing room the whole time…I didn't speak to anyone…I didn't look at anyone…I just sat on the floor watching the monitor…and watching my brothers as they flew through the air like trapeze artists in a circus. About an hour later, I was still sitting there when the door opened…Mark came in and just looked at me…I stood up ready to mow him over…
Mark said, "Can we talk?" I said, "What do you want? Haven't you done enough yet? You belittled me, you talked to me as if I was a whore…and said I was a liar…and then to top everything off…just to add to the pile of shit you've given me…you had my son taken away from me…If I ever get him back, I can't make up the time that he's been gone…I will never get those weeks or months back…and he's sitting in some God Damn foster home, and I don't know if he's sick, or if they are treating him good…I don't know anything about him right now…How could you do that to me?…hell, how could you do that to anybody…just take their life away from them like it's your decision…You're not God Mark…you may think your gods gift to women…but you're not."
I went to slap him, and he grabbed my wrist…DAMN…That's twice now…maybe I televise that too good…I really want to hit him…I have to work on my slap approach…of course my guess is, he's been slapped enough to know when it's coming.
Mark got closer to me and said, "Will you just stop for a minute please…I'm just trying to talk to you…I want you to hear everything I have to say, and then I'll leave." I jerked my arm away from him and sat on the couch with my knees in my chest and watched as Mark paced in front of me…at a slow speed, nothing fast…he was debating things over in his mind. He finally stopped and said, "Do you think it was easy for me to have my own son taken away from you?" I said, "Yes. You're the one who said he wasn't yours…now all of a sudden he is? Mark don't confuse me…I'd rather be pissed off at you…then confused right now…"
Mark said, "I never thought for a minute that Christopher wasn't my son…I knew he was mine…as soon as you told me…I was just so mad at you…I couldn't believe that I had let myself fall in love with some girl, who I'd only met and made love to after knowing for 7 hours…I knew you had fallen in love with me as crazy as it had seemed…7 hours really isn't sufficient time to know if you're in love with someone…but as we talked while you was giving me a massage…I was falling completely in love with you…I didn't know how or why, but I was…and then after we made love, I had just started to fall asleep when I heard you whisper in such a low tone, I wasn't sure I heard you right…but when you snuggled closer to me I knew I had heard you perfectly…I heard you say, 'I love you'…I know I wasn't imaging it…" I looked down and said, "No, you weren't imagining it…far from it…I said it."
Mark said, "Why didn't you say it to me…at least if you would have said it to me, I would have been able to say something back…something close to the fact of I love you too." I said, "Mark, I had only known you 7 hours…you was a stranger, you was someone I didn't even know…I didn't know anything about you, except for the fact that you made my whole body insane with love for you…I wanted to say it…but I didn't want to sound stupid at the time…that's why I just kept it to myself."
Mark said, "Well, next time say something…Then I left the next morning…and you called a couple of times…I was really pissed about that…I never wanted to lose touch with you…but I couldn't exactly call you back…you're number was blocked from my cell, and I didn't have your number…" I said, "Why didn't you ask me for it?" Mark said, "I didn't think you was going to stop talking to me…I thought I had done or said something wrong…and now after 3 years I find out, the only reason you stopped talking to me, was because you had a baby…and you didn't want to ruin my life…I have to be honest it wouldn't have ruined my life…"