DISCLAIMER: I do not own Lupin III, and—Wait, he isn't even in this chapter!!
Hi!
Sorry this chapter's a little late in coming, but someone just had to come down with a cold…. Eck… Nothing like watching talk shows all day… Anyway, I received a great deal of positive response from the first chapter, so I hope this next chapter does just as well. Remember that feedback is always appreciated, and I'll see you all again hopefully sooner than two weeks!
Fun Fact of Boredom: Speaking of disguises… Ming and then Ryo have the love for bracelets due to song lyrics from the oldie hit Judy in Disguise. 'Keep a wearing your bracelets/and your new ra ra/cross your heart yeah/with your living bra'. Hey, I don't understand those lyrics, either, but the song of a flashy girl in disguise seemed to fit Ming, and it was only natural Ryo carried on the tradition.
Chapter Two
A Short Time Later: Brilliant Disguise
'Golden slumbers fill your eyes,
Smiles await you when you rise,'
—The Beatles, 'Golden Slumbers'
A Small Province Outside of Germany:
"So, about the same size as Cagliostro, huh?" Ally repeated as he sat in the back seat with Heiji and Odori, as they had so long ago.
"Yeah… Place thinks of itself as its own country… It's really shut away from the rest of modern civilization… Less than ten percent of the population owns a television, and there aren't any American or Western stores to be found, anywhere! It kind of kept itself secluded even after the Berlin wall fell, and, well, no one talks about it and it keeps its mouth shut. But apparently their ruler is more vicious than he lets on…"
"Wait, so, a guy wanted to marry Leo?" asked Ryo.
"Heh, I had no clue Max was royalty!" Heiji laughed.
"Ha, ha… Yuck it up… Not funny… But this guy ain't taking no for an answer, so that's why I'm taking all of my murderous friends along with me! Because I personally loathe killing!" she said brightly with a smile. "Over here, Ryo-san…"
"That huge palace? You sure they'll let us in? I'm not exactly dressed for the occasion," Ryo admitted.
"Yeah, well, wearing jeans when you're in a popular band of thieves is a little gauche," Fuji started.
"Your father wore gray jeans," Ryo was quick to point out.
"And he also wore a Barbie pink and seafoam green jacket at different points in his life," Fuji added. "I was fortunate enough to inherit my mother's sense of style."
"And her fanbase…" Ryo mumbled.
"Here are the gates," Fuji whispered, and ducked down at little low as Ryo and Toshiro pulled up next to one another in front of the gates.
"Hey, let us in!" Ryo shouted.
"You have no business here!" shouted the guard at the front gate.
"Let us through or I'll cut you ribbons!" Odori shouted, gripping onto Zantetsu.
"Huh… Shouldn't you be home knitting?" asked the guard with a slight chuckle.
"No, Dori!" Heiji quickly gripped onto her as she went to go fight the guard, and Ryo continued, clearing her throat.
"We've got Lupin the Fourth," Ryo began.
"Where?" asked the guard. Yukiko raised an eyebrow and looked over at Toshiro as she noticed this guard was dressed the same way their attackers in Italy had been.
"Right here," Ryo nodded to Fuji. The guard gave way to a little smile, and a little laugh as well.
"Very… Very well… Enter!" he said in a whooping laugh which caused uneasiness amongst the group as they passed through the iron gates, hearing them clang in the background as they entered the mainly stone and sculpture courtyard, which in the center held a large running fountain. Fuji smiled as she laid eyes upon the fountain, but then turned her attention back to the large household in front of them.
"Holy crap," Yukiko said aloud as she stared stunned at the large household. "It's a friggin' palace!"
"Rulers usually reside in those," replied Toshiro with a heavy sigh. "The gardens are astounding…"
"You gonna take clippings for your herb garden?" Yukiko asked wryly.
"We're here to see Von Idle," shouted Fuji as Ryo stopped the car in front of the large doorway.
"So that's the name of Fuji's stalker…" said Odori to herself.
"Leave the vehicles here," another equally large guard ordered, "Guards! Take their luggage to their prepared rooms!"
"Huh… So I guess they were expecting us, eh?" Fuji said as she hopped out of the cars with the others. They walked into the large palace, and were told to wait in front of another set of large wooden doors. It was a long while before the doors opened and the group was sawn in by a butler. Von Idle was sitting in a study, many books on a large wooden desk forming a sort of fortress. Von Idle was tall, with long blonde hair, and a stern expression and sharp facial futures.
"Hey, he isn't half bad to look at…." Fuji admitted, much to Ryo's shock, "Baron Von Idle? I'm Lupin the Fourth—The one you threatened to tear to pieces if I didn't marry you. You still remember me?"
"Baron?" Von Idle wondered aloud in a thick German accent. "Wait… You are Lupin?"
"What'd you want, my dad?!" Fuji inquired with a chuckle, "I am the one and only… Black-haired, busty and beautiful as ever!"
"I was just expecting… Aren't there two of you? Don't you have a brother?" Von Idle asked.
"Yeah, but he legally changed his name, so now I'm carrying on the family lineage!" replied Fuji with a smile.
"Well… You certainly are boisterous…" Von Idle.
"Hey, it don't take a rocket scientist to figure out that I've got big—"
"That isn't what it means!" Ryo hissed, "Shut up before you make yourself look even more like an idiot!"
"I must admit, you do look a great deal like your mother," Von Idle rose, and walked over to Fuji. The Baron was dressed in attire which looked to be from the late 18th century, and Von Idle exchanged a smile with Fuji. "I suppose you'll do, after all."
"Wait, you still want to marry me!?" Fuji choked.
Von Idle nodded, "Yes."
"I thought you'd wan to call it off! Might I ask friggin' why, then!?" Fuji wondered aloud.
"Because many years ago, your great-grandfather, the original Arséne Lupin, entered our country… A local fortune teller told him that when the fourth generation emerges, our two families shall unite when my people are in time of need," responded Von Idle with a smile that made all uneasy. "And, apparently, it has come true…"
"Um… Heh heh, I hate to tell you this, man, but I'm not exactly marrying material! I mean, I look awful in virgin white, and there's a good reason to it, too!"
"Then you can wear a light blue wedding dress," replied Von Idle with another eerie smile. As the baron passed Odori, the samurai sniffed the air, and tilted her head to a side. She was clearly puzzled by something, but she did not say what.
"Uh… Hee hee… Um, I…" Fuji took a few steps back as Von Idle approached, and cracked a nervous smile. This nervousness then faded, and a smile came upon Fuji's face. Ryo could tell that Fuji was up to her usual tricks.
"Sounds good… Hey, why don't you give these guys a tour?" asked Fuji, nodding to her team, "I'll need someone to sit at my side in the church."
"Wait, what? Did I hear you right?" Yukiko asked in disbelief.
"Come on," several guards appeared, and quickly led them out of the study.
"Hey, don't worry about me, guys!" Fuji said, waving good-bye to her friends as they were locked out.
"Come with us," said the guards, leading the gang up a large flight of stairs to their rooms. When they were partway up the stairwells, they heard a scream emit from the study. All immediately ran down, Toshiro quickly disabling the guards and joining the others down the long passage.
"Fuji, we're coming!" Ryo shouted.
Meanwhile, on the road:
"Are you sure you read these right, Zenigata?" Leo sighed tiredly as he adjusted his glasses and read over the map, "I could've sworn we should've hit a toll bridge by now!... Max, where are you going?"
"Dammit, LeBlanc, I don't know! Do you want to give the wheel a try?" snapped Max.
"Like I wanted to an hour ago?" Leo sighed as he folded his map and tossed it into the back seat of the police cruiser, "We should ask for directions… I can speak German, so we ought to be okay."
"Like hell I'm going to pull over! We're on a roll, I can feel it!" said Max excitedly.
"I'm starting to wonder if I should be leaving breadcrumbs…" Leo muttered as he rested his head against the window of the car. "Hey! Hey, there it is!"
"Really!? Where!?"
"It's that huge building in front of us, Zenigata."
"Hey, I found it!"
"You—Yeah, yeah, Max… Ya found it… Now let's just try to get in, get Fuji and the gang, and get out of there as soon as possible, okay? I've heard nothing but bad news from this place…"
"Really? Like what?" asked Max, his voice apparent with curiosity.
"Well… A lot of people just disappear around here, that's all… And there's also rumor that they're notorious for sales in illegal weapons… They're also known as the only country on Earth who still sides with the losing side of the Second World War…."
By this time, Max slammed upon his brakes, which caused Leo to lurch forward, and then fall back into his seat, "These people are Na—"
"Cool it, Max… It's all just speculation! Just stuff that passes over my desk in the office!" Leo sighed, "Keep driving, okay?"
"Hey, the Alfa Romeo… And that goofy Vespa… They're past those gates!" Max said as he resumed driving drove up to the front gates of the palace.
"Guess they're here already," Leo added. Max brought the car to a halt, and looked upward at the large guard, and smiled at him hopefully. The guard did not smile in return, but instead leered downward at Max.
"Guten! Max Zenigata, Leo LeBlanc—Interpol," said Leo, showing his badge to the guard.
"I understand English," snapped the guard. "And I take it you both do, too."
"Yeah, fluently," replied Leo with a nod.
"Then you'll understand when I tell you you're out of jurisdiction here and if you both don't leave, you'll be escorted out," snapped the guard.
"What!?" Zenigata shrieked, and Leo grabbed Max in order to keep Zenigata from lunging at the guard, who only laughed as he looked upon Max's expression. "Lupin's in there, and you're going to have US arrested!? Do you all have any idea what kind of a criminal you're housing!?"
"Well, I know two which we won't be housing," answered the guard. "Interpol does nothing except trample upon the liberties of smaller nations. You all, as far as this country is concerned, are a group of International bullies…"
"Bullies!?" Max fumed, and Leo once again grabbed Zenigata before Max did anything stupid, "This is such bull s—"
"M-Max! Come on, let's just go make some phone calls, okay?" Leo asked, "We'll call some people to take care of this…"
"No way! I don't let anyone talk to me like that!" Max growled, "If I wasn't on duty, I'd—"
"Max!" Leo shouted.
"Heh… I'd listen to your mother back there, Inspector," said the guard with a smirk. "Or, is that your girlfriend? By the way you let him boss you around, perhaps I'm wrong, and you're his girlfriend…"
"Come on, Max, just back up. Please," Leo whispered. Max gritted his teeth together, backed away, and drove away from the palace angrily.
"What was up with you grabbing me!?" snapped Max.
"These people have rooftop snipers everywhere," Leo answered. Max looked in his rearview mirror, and, sure enough, there the snipers were. "They were all aimed at our car! Now, I know I've got a good shot, but I don't think I could ward off that many…"
"Well, then what the hell are we supposed to do?" Max inquired.
"You forget that I was once a convict and I learned certain tips from the dark side to use on the light side," replied Leo.
"Okay, quit talking in Jedi and tell me what you're up to…" said Max suspiciously.
"Well, Fuji won't be there too long, knowing her, so I'll have to get everything together quickly…"
"Get what together? Leo, what are you planning?" Max inquired.
"Exactly what's your shoe size?"
"Um… Eight, American," replied Max.
"So you'd be an eight… Okay," Leo nodded.
"An eight? What the hell are you talking about!? Tell me!" Max shrieked.
"Oh, you'll see, Zenigata…. You'll see…" Leo chuckled.
Inside the Palace:
"Fuji, what's wrong!?" Ryo shouted as Fuji burst through the door and leaned against it, a horrified look drawn upon her face.
"Von Idle… Von Idle…" Fuji panted.
"What'd that creep do to you!?" snapped Heiji fiercely.
"Von Idle's got a rack!" Fuji shrieked.
"What? A rack of what?" asked Odori.
"Your English needs so much work, Dori," sighed Toshiro tiredly.
"She could wear my bras!" Fuji squeaked, "Where the hell was she hiding those, anyway!?"
The unified phrase of the moment, as all took in what Fuji said, appeared to be, "…." Ryo soon broke this silence, however.
"Von Idle's a baroness?" Ryo asked with surprise.
"Apparently! That or he's in touch with his feminine side, not to mention a good plastic surgeon!" Fuji answered frantically. "What am I gonna do!?"
"Hm? Lupin, there you are… I thought you had run off…" Von Idle said as she opened her doorway and looked out at the group. She had removed her coat, and it was now strikingly obvious that Von Idle was indeed a woman. "I think we've been at some sort of misunderstanding…"
"Well no friggin' crap!" Fuji snapped quickly. "Why didn't you say something when I called you a baron!?"
"Thought it'd be better to explain the situation to you away from your teammates," replied Von Idle with a shrug. "Speaking of them, why don't you send them to their rooms?"
"Hey, Lady, we aren't dogs; she doesn't order us around like little puppies, as compared to popular belief," replied a slightly annoyed Yukiko.
"Then I'll have someone escort you," replied Von Idle sternly. "Now, Lupin…"
"I—I've got a headache," Fuji answered. "Can we talk about this tomorrow?" she asked with a hopeful smile.
Von Idle paused, "Very well. We'll continue in the morning… But I warn you, I've got rooftop snipers covering the entire area…. Even if a sword cuts through the wall, there will still be the matter of the heavy guards…"
"Hm… Apparently she doesn't know who I am…" Fuji mumbled, "Guess I'll have to wait on that treasure, after all…"
Later:
The same guard who had stood out earlier with the Lupin gang and then Leo and Max saw something approach in the distance. As it drove into view, it was clearly a Harley-Davidson motorcycle, with Fuji Lupin at the wheel. Gripping onto her was a more paranoid than usual Heiji Ishikawa. Fuji brought the bike to a halt in front of the guard, and smiled as she dismounted.
"Who are you?" the guard demanded.
"Hm… The girl of your dreams," replied Fuji with a smirk. "And… This is Heiji… Hopefully you don't dream about him…"
"Very funny. Now, how did you two get out?" snapped the guard.
"That's easy. I had two other distant associates pose as myself and Heiji while we scoped out the situation… Sneaky, yes, but it worked, and now I know that I can handle the situation, now that I've assessed it," replied Fuji with a smile.
The guard paused, and looked critically at Fuji and Heiji. Heiji moved back as the guard moved inward to take a closer look at him. He put a hand to Heiji's face, and nodded as he felt no mask. "All right…"
"Thanks, Sweetie!" Fuji said cheerily as she hopped back on the Harley and drove through the gates of the palace, "Good job, Zenigata…" Leo whispered.
"It's amazing how close you got to your sister's voice!" Max whispered, "Aren't you a little uncomfortable in that dress, though?"
"Eh, nothing I haven't done before," replied Leo as he pulled up next to the Romeo and Vespa.
"You have no idea how glad I am that pudgy laid off of the donuts… My face is a little bonier than his…." said Max.
"But it's really creepy how much you look like your nephew, Max… Which Zenigata do you guys take after, anyway?" asked Leo.
"My grandpa, actually. My dad looks like my grandmother," Leo stopped at this comment, and looked at Max disbelievingly a few moments before continuing to their raid into the palace. Von Idle was a little surprised to see Fuji and Heiji in the main entrance as she walked down the stairway, but then smirked good humouredly and silently continued.
"What'd he see in her?" Leo inquired.
"The daughter of his boss," responded Max with a shrug. "She really loved him, though… Went a little batty when he died."
Leo paused, "God you guys have got some family…."
"Heh, they aren't exactly normal, but I love them," Max answered with a shrug.
Both stopped at the foot of the stairs, and Fuji and Heiji stared at the Fuji and Heiji look-alikes in shock and surprise.
"I know who those legs belong to, but I don't want to admit it…" said Fuji with a gulp. She reached forward, peeled off the mask, and there, sure enough, stood Leo, wearing her same exact dress. "You know, I know Mom thought it was cute when we dressed alike when we were little, but I think you're carrying it over a little too far…"
"I'm not doing this for the hell of it, Fuji. I'm working a case…."
"Yeah, yeah… Any excuse to shave your legs…"
"I had them waxed, thank you!"
"Ouch," Max shuddered.
"Like you'd know what that was like…" Leo said with a roll of the eyes.
Max turned to him, "Do you any idea what kind of bored and sadistic bastards pass through the doors of the police academy, LeBlanc?"
"Yeow…" Heiji shuddered. "So, may I ask what do we owe the pleasure of the ambiguously gay duo visiting us?"
"Ha ha…" Max said blandly. "I could ask you the same question, Heiji… What the hell's your game, Lupin?"
"Game, no game," replied Fuji with a smile. "Now, tell me, guys—When can I expect to be Aunt Fuji?"
"How about we talk about that in handcuffs?" Max asked menacingly.
"Ph, try to get me out of here, Zenigata… Heiji and I have been going around for the past hour looking for escape routes… We're all trapped like prisoners!"
"What? All of us?" Max yelped.
"Not an unguarded door in this whole facility…." Heiji shrugged. "It's impeccable, really…"
"I'm stuck in a dress!?" Leo yelped.
"Relax, I brought you spare clothes in this stupid laptop case Ishikawa carries around…" Max said, holding up his suitcase.
"Thank God…" Leo muttered as he kicked off his heels.
"Ur… You may want to keep those… I forgot your shoes…" Zenigata added innocently.
"WHAT!?" Leo shouted angrily.
"Well…. Hey, they don't seem to be any trouble to walk in…"
"Then why don't you try?" Leo hissed.
"Eh, no, thanks," Max answered, shaking his head. "I'm a huge klutz in anything with heels… Even cowboy boots give me trouble!"
"Just wait until we're out of here… Then I'll give you trouble…" Leo grumbled as he stepped back into his heels.
"Um, hey, I was wondering if I could ask you guys a teensy, tiny favor?" Fuji asked meekly. "Could you…. Kind of… Um… Help… Me?"
Leo and Max stood there placid for a few minutes before Max broke into a wild fit of laughter, followed by Leo, who leaned against his friend for balance. "Why would we help you!?"
"Because this crazy lady wants to marry Lupin the Forth…." Fuji responded.
"But what do you have to do with it?" asked Leo.
"You gave up your name! She wants me!" Fuji shuddered, "I can't do it! C'mon, fellas, please, for old time's sake help Fuji, huh? C'mon, bro, what do you say? Come on… Think about everything nice I've ever done for you!"
"…That gives me even more reason not to help you, Fuji," snapped Leo after a pause. "We're going to find a way out of here, and then we're both taking you in… But that's only if you find me comfortable shoes…"
After stealing away an extra pair of Ally's shoes and after Leo and Max changed out of their disguises, Leo went to inspecting the palace, Fuji, Heiji and Max following closely behind him.
"There's always a trap door… Palaces, especially around this age, usually had one, in case the peasants revolted…. They'd have a back way to escape… It's all a matter of finding it…" said Leo, feeling about the stone wall for any sign of a trap door. "Let's see… Nope, not there… Na-ah…"
Max averted his eyes from Leo, and looked to Fuji, who was smiling strangely at both he and Heiji, "What exactly are you looking at?"
"I love twins," she responded with a wide smile. Max immediately tore off his black wig and glared at her, Fuji smiling in return. "Oh, don't be so modest, Zenigata… LeBlanc's enough of a prude, I would think."
"What's that exactly supposed to mean?" asked Leo as he peaked over a high ledge, but to no avail.
"I'm just surprised you two haven't, you know, yet," Fuji shrugged.
"Yeah… Hey, don't we still have that bet going on, Fuji?" asked Heiji.
"What bet would that be exactly?" Max snapped.
"Well… I'm betting that LeBlanc will kiss you…" Heiji started.
"And I'm betting you're going to kiss LeBlanc, Zenigata," Fuji added with a smile.
"You both have nothing better to do with yourselves?" Max asked blandly.
"How much is that bet, exactly?" Leo inquired.
"Five-hundred yen," Heiji answered.
"That's it!?" Max yelled angrily, "That's pocket change!"
"Hm… He's right! Let's make it five thousand American dollars then, huh?" Fuji asked excitedly.
"Sounds good to me. I could really use some new computer parts…"
"And I could use a new pair of shoes!" Fuji added.
"You need a new pair of shoes like you need a new hole in the head, Fuji," Leo said in a murmur. "Ah ha!"
"Ah ha good or ah ha you had to sneeze?" Fuji asked.
"Ah ha here it is!" Leo responded with a smile as he moved away a brick, and it revealed itself to be a door. Leo shoved the door open, and there was a long passageway down a darkened hall. "Anyone got a light?" asked Leo.
"Here," Heiji handed him a small flashlight, and Leo held the door open while Fuji, Heiji and finally Max slowly ventured down.
"Hey, Zenigata, wait a second!" Leo whispered.
"Huh?" Max turned his head, and Fuji and Heiji stopped and looked at the two. Leo pushed Zenigata's face to his and quickly kissed Max on the cheek, leaving the blonde inspector even more stunned than Fuji and Heiji.
"Fuji, pay the man," Leo said with a satisfied smirk.
"You did that just so I'd lose that bet, didn't you!?" Fuji yelled angrily, "You creep!"
"….I'm officially scarred for life…" Heiji said after a long pause.
"Eh, you can probably buy a few hours therapy with your money, Heij…. Now come on, guys…" Leo continued walking, and Heiji and Fuji resumed with him. Heiji turned back and nudged for Max to come, too. Zenigata had been in a sort of stupor until then, and Max nodded, purposely falling back. Fuji caught sight of this, and fell back as well.
"Well, I hope you're happy… I'm out five grand now…. Seems like you and Heiji were the only winners here…" Fuji mumbled. "Dad's gonna be thrilled… His little boy wants to hook up with a Zenigata, and I have a girl after my ass…"
"You guys didn't have any other bets, did you?" Max asked after a long pause.
"Why would you care?" Fuji inquired, raising an eyebrow in suspicion.
"I just don't want him to go along with anymore of your sophomoric antics!" Max snapped critically in response, "He was simply doing that to prove once again that you're always wrong!"
"Do you want me to make a bet about who wakes up first the morning after?" Fuji asked with a sly smile. "I'll do it if you let me off this time…"
"Get a grip. What do you take me for, anyway!?" Max asked angrily.
"You don't want to know the answer to that, Zenigata," Fuji said with somewhat of a wary tone, "But don't come crying to me when he leaves you for some pretty girl and you want my help to reel him back in…. Because good ole' Fujiko's door will have shut… The L Train will have left the station, you hear me, Zenigata?"
"Do you have an off switch somewhere?" Max asked in a tired mumble.
"It's called a blank check, Blondie," Fuji responded.
"Hey, guys, quiet!" Heiji whispered, coming to a dead halt. "What'd you find, Leo?"
"Holy… Wow…" Leo whistled and adjusted his glasses, "I don't believe it…"
"What's up, LeBlanc?" asked Max, pushing his way forward.
"It's a door…" Leo said in awe. He turned to the other three, "It's made out of gold!"
Upstairs:
"No sign of escape for miles…" Yukiko said with a shake of the head as she looked out her window and then turned back to Toshiro. He was pacing back and forth, trying to get any reception at all on his cell phone. Yukiko watched as he threw it to the floor, and jumped a little with surprise.
"I'm guessing the reception here sucks?" Yukiko inquired.
"Not only that… I was roaming…" Toshiro mumbled darkly, "We're all trapped!"
"Hey, maybe not…" Yukiko smiled suddenly as she saw a bird fly past her window. "Could you… Talk to one of your friends here?"
"The bird? Why?" Toshiro inquired.
"Just get the damn bird," Yukiko sighed. Toshiro nodded, and opened the window. He kneeled down on the small seat in front of the window, and removed some bird feed from a pocket. He held out his hand, and a pigeon was quickly attracted. He slowly and gently clasped his hand about the bird, and brought it back into the room.
"That a girl…" Toshiro cooed reassuringly to the small creature, who ate ravenously from his hand. "Now what, Yukiko?"
"Here," Yukiko took a small piece of paper from the desk table, and wrapped it about the bird's foot. "Now we'll need something shiny, like, um… What? What can we use?"
"Will a paperclip work?" Toshiro asked hopefully.
"Yeah," Yukiko nodded, and took a paperclip readily from the desk. She tied a small string to the bird's foot, and tied the paperclip to this. "Now let him go…"
"She's a girl," Toshiro corrected. "The plumage is different…"
"…Hrm… Well pardon me…" Yukiko muttered, "Touchy…"
"Sorry, I tend to get a little anxious when trouble is afoot…" Toshiro mumbled to himself as he sat upon the bed and leaned against the wall it was up against. "I have the feeling that there is more to this than we know. Fuji could escape if she wanted, you and I both know that."
"True… She did seem really freaked out over Von Idle, though. I wonder what's so great that's keeping her here…" Yukiko wondered out loud.
"Sometimes I wonder what keeps us here," Toshiro snorted.
"I just went because you wanted to," Yukiko shrugged. "I guess I'm to the point where I'm dependant on you, as friggin' sad as that sounds."
"Well, I am all that you have outside of your family," Toshiro reminded her with a small smirk of pride.
"How'd my life get to this, again?" Yukiko asked, "Bonding with the Bird man of Brooklyn."
"Hm, very funny," Toshiro sighed. "There isn't much to do until we wait for Fuji's signal to fight. There's no way we can all get out of here without working together. It'd be stupid or reckless to try anything else."
"Hey, I'm all for stupid and reckless, but I'm just out of ideas!" Yukiko admitted as she looked out the window once more. "Hopefully someone'll find that note and call the police, as much as I'd hate to get help from the right side of the law."
Back at the Gold Door:
"This is it!" Fuji said happily, "Oh wow, oh mommy… I can't believe it! Yes! Ha ha… Mommy's gonna be vacationing in Fiji for a long time, Boys."
"Not if I have anything to say about it…" Max replied crankily, "What's the story with this door?"
"Von Idle's great-grandfather was a ruthless thief… Made my own dear sweet great-grandpa shake in his frilly French boots… They did one gig together, and that was steal an entire room," Fuji explained.
"A room of what?" asked Heiji.
Fuji smiled wide, and there was a twinkle in her eye as she spoke, "Solid gold… They moved it out, piece by piece… Then they got into an argument, and Great-grandpa had to leave it, but promising to come back one day for it… He never did, so I will!"
"How come you always seem to hear these stories, and I never do?" asked Leo tiredly.
"I'm taking it back in the name of the Lupin clan!" Fuji announced happily.
"That's why you're risking your life, and also risking the possibility of becoming the wife of some crazed woman?" Max inquired, raising an eyebrow in interest.
"Yep! Honor of the family, Zenigata-sama," Fuji answered. "Now who wants to help me blow this door open, huh!?"
"This is in Russian… Fuji, this belongs to the Russian government!" Leo said as he studied the door more thoroughly.
"Yeah… Well, you think the Romanovs would've had an easier time keeping out revolting peasants, as tightly shut as this thing is…" Fuji muttered as she studied the lock upon the door closely. "We may even need a small bomb, Heiji!"
"Do you, like, forget that we're here!?" Max shouted angrily.
Fuji looked up from the lock at Zenigata, "What, do you know how to open locks, Max?"
"Yes, but I'm not going to tell you!" Max shouted in response, "What the hell kind of a joke of an inspector do you take me for!?"
"A pretty damn funny one," Fuji admitted. "Speaking of jokes, Leo, Dad wanted you to know that he saw that video you posted on the Internet… The one with you and your Interpol boss."
"What!?" Leo yelped, horrified, "What'd he say!?"
"Good job," Fuji answered. "But he has a list of pointers for you."
"Yeah, I typed it up. Here's the first page," Heiji removed a list from his shirt pocket, and passed it to Leo. LeBlanc read over it, and his face reddened, and he quickly hid it away in a jacket pocket, horrified at what his father had written.
"Okay, I think I've got it!" Fuji said triumphantly.
"Oh, but I think we've got you, my Dear," Fuji gulped as she heard this uttered, and turned around to see Von Idle and a barrage of guards staring back at their small party.
"Aw, crap…" Max muttered in a low voice, "Here we go…"
"Exactly!" Fuji yelled, quickly taking Heiji by the hand and running into one of the long darkened tunnels.
"Hey, wait for us!" Leo shouted, and pulled Max along with him into the dark tunnel.
"Follow them!" Von Idle ordered, and the guards broke into a run after the two inspectors and two thieves.