Legacy of the Sith
Chapter 19: Darth Jerk and Jedi Master Wormie
Vader was on his holocom as he boarded the Falcon.. Han was bursting with about a thousand questions, but didn't dare interrupt. Han still could barely stand it. Not only had he failed to kill Kenobi, he had been worried about that snake! Fear crept into every molecule of his being. What was he going to do now? He'd heard the horror stories of what had happened to those who'd failed Vader in the past. Was he going to become another one of those losers?
But apparently, Vader had other concerns. One thing about him; he didn't waste time once he got started!
"What do you mean, the Emperor's not there? He has to be there; he was planning on overseeing the final stages himself!" Vader argued with the small figure on a holocom.
"Lord Vader, I'm sorry, but the Emperor never made it here. He sent me in your place, to oversee the Death Star's completion," the figure answered.
Yeah, Han had been hearing the rumors for a long time, even before Hoth, that Palpatine wasn't done with trying to make his pet project work. Apparently, he'd gotten the thing almost rebuilt. Whoever Vader was talking to, he had to be important; he could see that the man's uniform was white, which meant it was a Grand Admiral that Vader was browbeating...
"Well, Thrawn, where could he be?" Vader asked with an exaggerated patience.
"I can only assume he's still on Coruscant," Grand Admiral Thrawn answered.
"I must say, this is not at all like you, Admiral! You usually are never this inefficient! What do you mean, you can only assume that the Emperor is on Coruscant?" Vader snapped. "If he wasn't coming, then why didn't someone, either him, or even you, contact me?"
"With all due respect, Lord Vader, I was given very strict instructions from the Emperor himself not contact you under any circumstances."
Vader didn't respond at first. Of course. Palpatine must have known that he was training his apprentice. After considering this for a moment, Vader asked slowly, "Well, you are speaking to me now, aren't you? Why is that?"
"Two reasons, Lord Vader. First of all, you contacted me; I did not contact you," Grand Admiral Thrawn pointed out in his usual, insufferably precise way. "Second, I am as concerned as you are about the Emperor. He has not seen fit to contact me. I'm on full alert for this Rebel Fleet that is supposed to be coming here. Perhaps he thought better of coming here if there was going to be an imminent attack?"
"Unlikely; he was quite confident of the Death Star's abilities, along with the fool-proof nature of his plan. Only something dire could have kept him. I will get to the bottom of this, make no mistake." He signed off, then growled, "Damn those fools! How do you lose your own Emperor?"
"Um, I don't know if you want my opinion or not..." Han began with his heart hammering up into his throat.
"I would very much like to hear you opinion, my apprentice. After all, you served in the Imperial Navy. Maybe you could illuminate me," Vader growled.
"Um, I was just thinkin' that G-A Thrawn isn't terribly interested in Palpatine's whereabouts, as long as he isn't there. And he sure doesn't want you there either."
"I have a bad feeling about all this. In fact, the more time passes, the more it feels wrong," Vader said. "I want you to go back to the Rebel Alliance and reintegrate yourself with them. Pick up Chewbacca. Find my daughter. In the meantime, I must return to Coruscant. Darth Sidious is up to something, and I want to make sure no more planets get blown up before I figure out what it is!"
"Wait a minute! How are you going to get there without me? You've got no ship!" Han pointed out.
"I have my methods. Don't worry about me; it would be better now if we were separated anyway. It will throw Kenobi and these other Jedi fools off track."
"You mean to say that he's still alive?" Han felt sickness creep into his stomach. "Look, I know I screwed up before," Han began.
"How did you 'screw up?'" Vader asked. "Your duel with Obi-Wan Kenobi could not have gone better. You are still alive. Moreover, you didn't even lose any body parts. No, I'm afraid it was my fault things didn't go the way you'd planned."
"You mean you're not gonna kill me?" Han blurted out.
"Pay attention, Solo, because I'm not going to tell you again. The Sith master cannot kill his or her apprentice once they've taken one on!"
"Even if he loses his temper and does the chokie-chokie thing? Just asking!" Han quipped when he saw Vader cross his arms with silent annoyance. "As it happens, I did remember you sayin' that. So you don't have to worry that all that alcohol affecting my brain."
Vader was a bit startled by that comment. "Hmm, it appears your mind powers are sharpening. I do think about your excessive alcohol consumption, but I worry more about your liver than you brain. At this point."
"Oh, great! You think I need a twelve-step program? Yeah, I can just picture this: 'Hi, I'm Darth Han, and I'm an alcoholic...Hi, Darth!'" Han snorted.
"No, you're name is not going to be Darth Han, I told you... But you know, I'm going to have to think of a really good name for you," Vader mused.
"How about 'Darth Jerk,'" Han sighed with sudden disgust.
"Quite the suggestion. And just why do you think I should name you, my Sith Apprentice, something like that?" Vader asked.
Han shook his head unhappily. "I can't stand the guy! Why couldn't I just let him rot?" Han growled.
"Why couldn't I? When he'd left me alone on that cliffside?" Vader countered.
"I think I know the answer, but you ain't gonna like it," Han ventured.
"And what might that answer be, my apprentice?"
Han sighed deeply. "I guess we're just a lousy pair of Sith lords."
Vader's back stiffened. "That's because we are allowing ourselves to get distracted with our issues. We need to get back on track. We are allowing ourselves to get distracted too easily."
"Well, G-A Thrawn at the steering wheel of a Death Star might qualify as a legitimate distraction, don't you think?" Han shot back.
"Well, he will not dare do anything without specific orders from the Emperor. And those orders will never come, I can personally guarantee that. But just to be on the safe side, perhaps you ought to find out why your rebel friends haven't attacked Endor yet," Vader suggested.
"Hey look, I'm not doin' any spyin' on them, even if you are my master. Just because I'm studying from you doesn't mean the Emperor is suddenly a good guy or suddenly the right person to run the galaxy!" Han warned.
"I don't need you to spy for me, my apprentice," Vader answered with that assurance that set Han on edge. That tone that said he already knew what was going to happen, that he was going to get his way as usual.
"What about Kenobi?" Han threw back at him.
"When you meet with him, just do what I told you to do. And all will be well. You do remember what I taught you to do, right?" Vader asked in a very crafty voice.
"Yeah, I remember. I'm doing it right now," Han reported.
"Excellent. Remember, it is the secret of the Sith's power. I'm sure the look on Kenobi's face when he sees you again will almost be worth leaving him alive to see. Now, go. When I need you again, I will contact you. May the Force be with you," Vader said.
"Yeah, may the Force be with you too," Han responded, feeling uncertainty gnaw at his stomach.
Luke took a steadying breath. The last time he entered the cave, he had known there might be some significance to it, but he had no idea of just how much importance was really placed on the Trial of the Cave until that moment. If he got out of the cave, he would be a Jedi Knight! He turned to Obi-Wan, who nodded once, showing no trace of anxiety or uncertainty. Then he locked eyes with Yoda, who stood upon a rock. Suddenly, Yoda's and Obi-Wan's lightsabers glowed in the misty darkness.
"Who comes to the cave?" Yoda asked.
"I bring my Padawan Learner, Luke Skywalker, to face the Trial of the Spirit," Obi-Wan answered.
"Passed the Trial of Skill and Trial of the Flesh, he has?" Yoda asked Obi-Wan.
Obi-Wan answered, "Yes, Master Yoda. The Trial of Skill was passed many times over, first by destroying the first Death Star, and most recently when he raised that elevator so I could escape that building. As for the Trial of the Flesh, Darth Vader saw to it that Luke endured a harrowing Trial indeed. The Trial of the Spirit is the only one that remains."
"Agree with these things, I do. Enter the Cave that Mirrors the Spirit, you must." With a glance to his side, Yoda noted Luke's lightsaber already beside him on the rock. This time, Luke knew he would not be needing it.
With a small bow, Luke turned to face the Cave that Mirrors the Spirit. Odd, Luke had been under the impression that the cave had been a place filled with the Dark Side. Well, he decided to put that thought aside for now. All would become clearer with time...
Luke walked for a length of time. Nothing of any conseqence was around him, but up ahead, he saw some welcoming bright light. He smiled when he saw where he was; Camie was lounged in her usual spot, on Fixer's lap. Windy was wiping down a vaporator part. Deak was playing with a beat-up droid's speakers.
He was at Toshi Station! He'd meant to get over there on his last visit to Tatooine, but because Jabba's Palace had been closer to Mos Espa, he didn't have time to travel to Anchorhead. Leia had berated him for wanting to go back.
Windy finally looked up from his task. He blinked, shook his head, then wiped his hand on the front of his mechanic's jumpsuit. "Well, I'll be damned! Luke Skywalker!"
"Fix? Did you just hear Windy say that Luke Skywalker's in town?" Camie asked drowsily.
"Yeah, Cam. He's right there," Fixer answered with a touch of wonder in his voice.
"Hey everybody! What's going on?" Luke said with excitement.
Windy gaped. "I heard you'd got killed, with your aunt and uncle. Are you real, or a ghost?"
"Windy, since when did you beleive in ghosts? I'm no ghost!" Luke nearly laughed. Surely Windy couldn't be serious!
"Well! If you weren't dead, what kept you away so long? And where's Biggs?" Windy asked.
Luke bowed his head. Biggs used to be his best friend. He'd hooked up with Rebel Alliance people who had contacts at the Imperial Academy, where Biggs had gone while Luke remained on Tatooine to help his uncle with vaporators. "Biggs is dead, Windy. He's the one who died, not me. But he died nobly, in an X-wing fighter, during the attack on the Death Star. I'm sure you've all heard about that," Luke added a bit sarcastically.
Fixer, after removing Camie from his lap, came around from his side of the workbench. "Sure, even we heard about the Death Star. What are you trying to say? That you were there, and you saw it happen?" he asked derisively.
Windy laughed and added, "Yeah, we all know how much you wanted to get into the thick of things."
If they only knew... Luke began to think, but then cut it off. The urge to tell them that he had made the shot that destroyed the superweapon came over him, but he squelched it. Instead, he crossed his arms and glanced at each one of them. Not one of them had changed at all. It was just like the last time he'd been there, when he'd dashed into town to tell them all about the space battle that had been taking place right over their heads. Which they would have seen, if only they had looked up. But that was just it. Windy never believed him. And Fixer was never the type to look up.
"Would you take a look at those clothes he's wearing?" Deak breathed fearfully.
"What?" Luke asked, glancing down at his Jedi robes. He looked no different than Obi-Wan did when he ran around Tatooine as Ben, only not as old, obviously. Everybody looked him over in turn, but none of them seemed to see what Deak saw, yet.
"Yeah, what?" Camie whined. She ambled over to Luke, and for one second, Luke had forgotten that five years had passed since he'd had a major crush on her. Her sandy hair was just as he remembered it, and her cat's eyes blinked at him.
Deak hissed, "Camie, don't! Can't you see, he's a Jedi Knight?"
"Oh, Deak, stop being stupid. Luke Skywalker wasn't Jedi material. That would be like sayin' Camie was Jedi material! Nobody from 'round these parts ever becomes anything more than moisture farmers or Jabba's hoods or mistresses!" Fixer pronounced.
"Fixer, Deak is right. I became a Jedi," Luke told him.
"See, he even admits it! Get out Jedi! I didn't do anything! You can't do no mind tricks on me, see, I got this good luck charm! It keeps people like you away!" Deak gasped, holding out a Jappor Snippet.
"Deak, knock it off!" Camie snapped. "Gee, Luke, you sure got Deak all crazed. Dressing up like a Jedi! How did you know that would freak him out?"
"Truthfully, I didn't realize it would," Luke said, "but I should have, I suppose."
"Hmph! Truthfully, I didn't realize it would. Since when did you get so...uppity?" Fixer snorted.
Luke was about to retort, Since I found out I'm Darth Vader's son! But he didn't let the words out. The thought shocked him. Imagine if these guys found out about that!
"What's the matter, Fix? Jealous?" Camie shot back. Fixer sat back at his workbench, not answering.
"Forgive me. I didn't realize my reappearance here would upset everyone so much," Luke admitted.
"Well, I'm not upset, Luke. I'm just glad you're alright," Windy assured him.
Luke nodded once, in a typical Jedi manner. Deak eyed him very warily, crept back to the droid he'd been dissecting. Camie eyed Deak, and laughed. "What's the matter, Deak? You afraid of Jedi Master Wormie here?"
A sudden surge of rage jolted Luke. Wormie! Surely, after everything he'd been through, he deserved a better nickname that that! Did Yoda know he'd once had a name like that? Did Obi-Wan? How would Leia, and Han, and especially his father react to that name? He wasn't that same young loser! How dare you call me that? his mind raged.
And there, he realized, was the answer. No one in this cave version of Toshi Station had changed, but he had! So instead of getting angry, Luke just let the anger seep out of his system. He even brought himself to give Camie a tight grin. "Deak, I'm sorry I frightened you. But I'm glad I came here. I'm glad I saw you all. I now know that it's true when they say you can't go home again..." He bowed out the door he'd come in...
And found himself in a dark room. He went to the window, and the scene looked familiar, somehow. It took him a moment to realize where it was; Cloud City. Glancing behind him, Luke found the room was some kind of guest bedroom. He heard voices approaching from beyond, and Luke did not want to be seen, so he dove under the bed before the door opened.
The voices were all too familiar. "Han, I can explain!" Leia's voice pleaded.
"How long have you known that Luke is really your brother, Leia?" Han asked angrily. Damn, Luke thought sadly, I still haven't even told Han!
"It's been a few months; since before we got you out of Jabba's Palace," Leia admitted.
"Tell me, Leia. If Luke wasn't your brother, would you be with him now?" Han asked.
There was a very thick silence. Luke was glad he didn't have to see anything, since his eyes were burning anyway. He felt there should be someone to blame here. But who? His parents? Obi-Wan and Yoda? Or himself? Who could he rage at, that their actions had caused him to fall in love with his sister?
One thing was very clear. There was no way he could go on like this. He had to move on. At least Leia had Han to fall back on. Or did she? The door opened, and the new voice shocked him even more.
"Perhaps she would be with me instead," Obi-Wan announced. Luke had to squeeze his hands into tight fists. No, not his Jedi Master! Not with Leia! Luke had always thought that Leia just had this stupid temporary infatuation with Obi-Wan, not a love-affair!
"What are you doin' here, Kenobi?" Han growled.
"You should have stayed away, Solo. When you left Tatooine, we all thought it had been because you knew about Leia's and Luke's parentage. Apparently, my Padawan had not told you what he was supposed to."
No, Master! Don't tell Han, not like this! Luke begged in silence, but it was futile. The words, Darth Vader is their father, just hung in the air as if they had been spoken, thought technically, they had not been.
Luke saw, from under the bed, Han's boots as he stomped off. No words, just walk away. Obi-Wan and Leia settled on the bed. No, I cannot remain here, Luke decided, slithering out of the bedroom while they were occupied. Luke's stomach was roiling, but he knew he could not interfere in this. Though he definitely wanted to, he couldn't. The dim light in the outer chamber showed very little, except that there was a deck outside the slider doors. Luke went out there, wanting the air desperately.
Gripping the railing, he peered down. Cloud City had no ground. Imagine if somebody actually jumped out their window; would they ever land anywhere? Surely Obi-Wan and Leia wouldn't notice if Luke jumped... And what a great answer to his problems, to just bow out gracefully. Then he wouldn't have to deal with his feelings about Leia, Obi-Wan, or his father anymore. Yes, taking the long walk off the deck sounds like a really good idea.
Wait! What kind of thing was this? Luke had never been suicidal before! He'd never be acting like this if it wasn't the Cave! He turned away from the ledge--
--only to see a gaunt man, dressed in flamboyant livery, bow before him. "Please, your Highness, follow me..."
Stupidly, Luke glanced around him, looking for Leia. She was the one always addressed that way, but she was nowhere around. In fact, that whole Cloud City apartment disappeared. The gaunt man had lamp-like eyes and teeth that glinted bright white but were filed to points. It occurred to Luke that the creepy man wasn't addressing himself. "You don't mean me, do you?" Luke asked finally.
"Your father, Emperor Vader, is awaiting your audience, your Highness. Please, come this way. He has been very eager to see you, and it is not wise to keep our illustrious Emperor waiting..." With that lingering pain in his stomach, Luke followed the man down a huge great hal, with stained glass cielings and dark stone walls. Like something out of a picture book on ancient historical buildings, Luke mused.
The illustrious Emperor Darth Vader sat in the same kind of seat his former master had, but he didn't fit so well in it. Vader had to fold his long legs up to the side to keep them out of the way. Luke was momentarily aware of his jealousy of his father's height. Why couldn't he pass that on to me? Clearing his head of peevish thoughts, Luke approached and bowed. "Father, here I am. You wanted to see me?"
"Indeed, I did, my son. I understand you passed the Jedi Trials. I wanted to tell you that I..well, I can't really say I'm proud..but that I always knew, as did my former master did, that you had it in you," Vader began. Luke noted that Darth Vader's appearance didn't change all that much, aside from the touches of silver against the black that has been added to his suit, denoting that something was different. "Well, aren't you going to congratulate me? I'm the Emperor."
Luke said, "Father, that has to be the absolute worst thing you could have done for yourself. A controlling man like you given the keys to the kingdom! Have a care; no one is going to tolerate the dictatorship from you any more than they did from Palpatine!"
Vader stood up. "I'm not worried, my son. After all, I have the Jedi Order at my disposal, thanks to you."
"The Jedi Order are not your servants, Father!" Luke corrected him.
"That's what you think, Luke. You three only survive on my good graces. I know you wanted this very badly, and I finally worked out a way where we could both get what we wish, my son. But know this; the Jedi of old had become virtual slaves of Darth Sidious before the Clone Wars ended. I saw this happen myself. I learned from him, very well, how to manipulate the Jedi. We all can co-exist, as long as they all realize that the Sith rule them, and always will. This way, the Balance of the Force can be maintained," Vader explained.
"That's only if you remain a Sith lord, Father. Which I am determined to change! So that you are aware, I'm not through with you yet! Not by a long shot! May the Force with with you," Luke said, turning his back on Vader and quickly leaving. His fledgeling Jedi Order would not bow and scrape to his father! He'd make sure of it personally. He was no longer afraid of facing Vader; he knew his father better now, and he knew that his father secretly ached to stop this madnes but just didn't know how. Luke would show him...
So preoccupied with these thoughts was Luke that when he came out of the cave, and saw two lightsabers glowing upright in the darkness, at first, he didn't seem to register it.
"Step forward, Luke Skywalker," said Yoda's voice.
Luke did so, and then knelt before the old alien standing on the mossy rock. Yoda's lightsaber pointed over Luke's left shoulder. "By the will of the Force," he said, then moved the blade to hover over Luke's right shoulder, "We thee dub, Jedi Knight..." Luke thought he could almost hear the part Yoda omitted; of the Republic...
Obi-Wan's smile was at least as bright as his lightsaber. Luke glanced up at his now-former Jedi masters, and nodded with a smile of his own. "Thank you both for helping me. The Force is with us, I know this. But we have a lot of work to do."
"We leave for Endor first thing in the morning, Luke. Be ready to go," Obi-Wan advised.
"That's just the beginning of out work, my brothers..." Luke murmured as they all departed.