Hi everyone! This chapter (so far) was one of my favorite to write, so I hope you enjoy!
(Disclaimer: See Chapter 1.)
Chapter 7:
An Angry Mudblood
"'I bet I'm in Hufflepuff,' said Harry gloomily.
'Better Hufflepuff than Slytherin,' said Hagrid darkly. 'There's not a single witch or wizard who went bad who wasn't in Slytherin. You-Know-Who was one.'"
Jonah was having the time of his life.
He had read the Harry Potter books so much that it wasn't even funny. Once, he had read the entire series in four days. Now, he was getting to live the life he had always wanted to live - the life of a Hogwarts student.
The only problem was his House.
Jonah wouldn't deny that he was a Slytherin - he was shrewd, ambitious, and an all-around cunning guy. But one of the bad things about being a Slytherin was that he had to share a house with Malfoy and Crabbe and Goyle and all the other people who would hopefully never be tolerated back where he came from.
His saving grace was being in Ava and Zoë's House. They were still ambitious and clever - and Ava loved snakes - but they didn't have any Muggleborn prejudice. Almost every day, he'd hear Malfoy sneer about having Mudbloods in his House, or Marcus Flint talking about how twisted it was that Hermione Granger, a Mudblood, was one of the smartest girls in the school when she probably stole her magic from someone - but Ava and Zoë never talked like that.
It came to a head in late October, just before Halloween, when Jonah walked up to the Slytherin door, down in the dungeons, and tried to get in.
"Callidus," Jonah said.
Nothing. The door, for some reason, didn't respond.
"Callidus," he repeated.
Still nothing.
"I said Callidus!" Jonah said.
Still, nothing worked.
Jonah fished in his pocket for a paper clip and found one. Thank goodness, he thought. He took it out and bent it into a straight line. He walked up to the door and found a small hole in the carving of a snake on the door.
Carefully, the paper clip line went into the hole, and Jonah fiddled with it, trying to pick the lock. When he felt that it had to be undone by now, he pushed at the door.
Nothing happened.
Of course, Jonah thought too late. It's magic.
Now there was only one thing left to do. Jonah grabbed a hammer from inside his robe and ran at the door.
"Take this, magic!" he shouted as he brought the hammer down on the snake. The rock caved in, and Jonah could see the Slytherin fireplace.
"Thank goodness," he said, walking towards the door - but just before he could crawl through, the rock bounced back, almost hitting him in the face.
Jonah rolled his eyes, raising the hammer to see if another hit would break the magic. He started to bring it down -
"Oh, don't bother," a proper voice said behind Jonah. He turned around to see that it was Malfoy.
"Put that Muggle thing away," he said, and Jonah obliged. "Why the enfer do you have a hammer with you?"
"Why the enfer not?" Jonah replied.
"Here, I'll do it," Malfoy said, walking towards the door. "It's obviously Ambitiose, you idiot Mudblood."
The door opened and Malfoy walked in, leaving Jonah with a thunderstruck look.
"By the way," Malfoy said, "you really don't need a hammer with you."
He moved his hand to close the door, but Jonah stopped him.
"I...am not...a Mudblood," Jonah said, panting. "I…am a Muggleborn...and proud of it."
He let go of the door for dramatic emphasis.
"Besides, it's my lucky hammer, and it's come in handy before," he said snarkily.
Malfoy rolled his eyes and walked inside.
"Flint?" he called. "Get in here."
Marcus's large sixth-year feet thumped down the stairs in the common room as Jonah walked in.
"Shoot," Jonah muttered under his breath. Whenever Marcus showed up, things were never sunshine and rainbows.
Finally, Marcus came into view as he finished his walk down the stairs. His teeth were crooked - like usual - his hair a mess - like usual - and his attire covered in greens and golds - like usual.
"What are you gonna do?" Jonah said. "I'm not scared of you or anything like that."
"I know," Flint said, his proper voice not matching his disheveled body.
"So do I," Malfoy said. "But, Marcus, this traitor is proud of being a - as he calls himself - Muggleborn."
He shivered when saying the word, as if not saying the wizard curse would poison him.
"So why don't we show this idiot Mudblood how we do things around here?"
That was it. Jonah drew his wand and pointed it at Draco.
"Don't...call...me...Mudblood," he said. "I am more than just a toy for you."
Out of the corner of his eye, Jonah saw Marcus roll his eyes and draw his own wand.
"Perfect, Marcus," Malfoy said. Jonah turned to look at Marcus head-on - until he suddenly heard Marcus's proper voice shout:
"Imperio!"
Jonah couldn't see. It was as if all his senses had gone out, like the filament of a lightbulb breaking down. He couldn't hear a thing, or feel the air that he knew must be around him.
Of course he knew what was going on - he had read Goblet of Fire about a zillion times - it's a technical term, Jonah thought in the internal monologue he was trapped in. But for some odd reason, he didn't care.
Then, out of the blue, he heard something - Marcus's proper voice, yelling at him.
Dance for me, you idiot! Sing! it said. Sing "I'm a Mudblood, I'm a Mudblood, a filthy little Mudblood!"
His voice had changed from prim, proper, Percy Weasley-esque tones to sneering, snivelling, Agatha Trunchbull-esque tones.
Come on, do it, you butthead! Get up on the table and dance!
No, I don't think I will, another little voice said - definitely not Marcus's. Why would I do it? You never jump up on a table and call yourself a racial slur - it just makes you look like an idiot.
You are an idiot, though! Marcus's teasing voice said.
What's the square root of 841? Jonah thought, like a little conversation between him and Marcus.
Uhh… Marcus paused, and Jonah used the opportunity to grab for his wand, which he somehow knew had been put back in his pocket when he had been dazed from the spell, and point it in the direction of Marcus's voice.
It was as if the filament had been fixed. Suddenly, Jonah could see Marcus perfectly - the boy was shaking, Jonah's wand pointed directly at his chest. A draft blew through the room, one that Jonah could finally feel.
He sighed with relief and put away his wand.
"By the way, it's twenty-nine," he said.
"What?" Malfoy said, dumbstruck.
"The square root of 841 - it's twenty-nine."
"What does that have to do with the price of tea and china?" Malfoy asked.
"More than you would think, Draco," Jonah said, beginning to walk up the stairs to his dormitory.
"Get back here," Malfoy called, "you little -"
"Call me Mudblood one more time!" Jonah yelled down.
Malfoy side-eyed Marcus. "He's an angry Mudblood."
"Oh, now you asked for it!" Jonah said, running back down the stairs and drawing his wand again.
"Petrificus Totalus!"
Malfoy froze in place and fell to the ground. Out of the corner of his mouth, he was able to sneak out, "That's the second time that's happened to me!"
Jonah smiled and ran up the stairs to his dorm.
Thanks for reading! Here's the behind-the-magic (I've always wanted to say that) fun facts for this chapter.
1) The square root of 841 is actually 29.
2) The hammer and "Take this, magic!" lines were actually the idea of Jonah's inspiration, who is extremely snarky (although as far as I know, he doesn't carry a hammer around with him).
3) I was originally going to have Draco and Jonah curse in this chapter, but then I felt really uncomfortable (especially because the story's rated K+ for implied language), so I replaced them with alternatives, like "shoot" and "enfer." (Look it up - it's French.)
4) One of the reasons this chapter is my favorite so far is that I was able to get a Hamilton reference and an Elf reference into two lines of dialogue. See if you can find it!
5) Ambitiose is Latin for ambitious, and callidus is Latin for cunning. (I was originally going to have the password have the word Mudblood in it, but then realized that it was really hard to come up with a short password that put down Muggleborns.)
6) And yes, I know, Hagrid's wrong. I just thought it would be a funny juxtaposition to go from "There wasn't a witch or wizard who went bad who wasn't in Slytherin" to "Jonah was having the time of his life." Remember, part of the story is Molly overcoming her Slytherin prejudices.
Feel free to review, but please no negative reviews or cursing. (And please, NOTHING POLITICAL!) Thanks!